because i know you love it dearly


“i feel so lucky to have existed at the same time as you, clearly the odds were in my favor for once.“

If you’re working retail on Black Friday (today) I know it can be hard and I know you might just feel like a cog in a machine and I know white people will look down on you and treat you like servants and I know it sucks (because I am currently on break which ends in 5 minutes). But I just want you to know that your worth is not derived by how useful white people think you are. You are not a lowly servant, you are not just a tool for white people’s use. You are amazing and strong for carrying on and I love you all dearly.

If you’re by yourself this Christmas or if you just feel like you’re by yourself, I pray that whoever you are, wherever you are, that God would touch your heart tonight. I pray you’d both go to sleep and wake up knowing and believing and feeling that you are loved and that you’re not alone. No matter what your circumstances may be, nothing can change the fact that God sent His Son to be born for us and for that we should always be grateful. He truly loves us, and though our lives be broken still we must worship Him and praise Him however we are able, because He is honestly so, so good and immeasurably worthy.

God knows you and He loves you dearly. I hope He gives you reasons to smile and be happy and just thankful this season whatever things may look like for you.

Merry Christmas, xx.

Dan Talking About The Problem With Onision
  • the chat: watch onision's video
  • Dan: no, I don't like people that...
  • Dan: listen, I feel like recently a lot of people have felt like me and Phil are very popular and they just talk about us to get attention from you. You know? And I feel like they're using you to get attention and money for themselves. It makes me very sad because we appreciate and love you very dearly and we think you're very kind, we don't like any of you being exploited. So I personally, It's a pet peeve of mine when people are professional fans of other people to just leech off of the fanboys and girls.
24 Days of Christmas: “Why Do You Hate Love?” *T’Challa x Reader*

Originally posted by marvelheroes

Day Twenty-Two

Summary: “You don’t like marshmallows in your hot chocolate? Why do you hate love?”

Note- Christmas isn’t mentioned. Hopefully, I do him some justice. I have only wrote one thing in the past of T’Challa, so please go easy on me, especially since this is shorter than the previous two things posted. I have done zero research on Wakanda, I am taking knowledge from stuff I’ve read, so I am sorry if this is wrong. - Rosalee

Day Twenty-One

You were under the double bed looking for your pet, Aziza; he’s a pure a cat, Savannah breed with bright green eyes. He’s honestly, your pride and joy, you love him dearly but he has this thing of running away from you. All the time. Your boyfriend tells you it’s because you smother him, which is highly likely but he does love cuddles, you know deep down in that little cat heart, he does.

“Y/N, what are you doing?” The sudden, deep voice startled you so much you jumped, banging your head on the slats of the bed. You shimmed out and held the top of your head, glaring at T’Challa who was staring down at you with questioning, and concerned brown eyes. “Aziza has gone missing, again?”

You nodded with a small sigh, pouting as you looked around the room from your spot on the floor, listening to any sound of a small ‘meow’. It’s not like he has run away, not really, in fact, he loves to run around in the trees outside the palace of Wakanda. He loves the outdoors but you don’t like him going outside, at all.

“What if he never comes back?” You look up at T’Challa with wide eyes, he sighs gently and walks over to you and kneels, taking your hands in his forcing you by touch to look at him. “What if he went outside and something happened?”

He shakes his head, he couldn’t help the small smile appearing on his face, he always loved how emotional you get over these things. You and he both knew Aziza would come back, he always does. You just get protective and think the worse things, “He’ll be back in a few hours, he always does and he’s a strong, versatile cat!” You sighed, knowing how true his words are.

He kisses your forehead gently, standing up and pulling you to your feet, he glanced at you to make sure you were actually okay. You weren’t because you are thinking a mile a minute, despite T’Challa’s comforting words and the truth behind them, you couldn’t help but worry still and he got that.

He called someone over, “Can we have two hot chocolates please,” You sighed gently and that’s exactly what you needed.

“With Marshmallows!” You add quickly, they nodded with a small grin.

“I do not want marshmallows in mine,” They left as you frowned up at T, who pulled you to sit on the bed, he didn’t notice your weird look to him. Instead of pulling you to cuddle him, he eventually noticed your face, “I don’t like marshmallows in my hot cocoa.” He shrugged.

“You don’t like marshmallows in your hot chocolate?” He nodded, “why do you hate love?” He rolled his eyes with a simple chuckle just as the mugs of hot chocolates were brought to you both.

He takes a quick sip watching as you drink your own in comfortable silence, “I just don’t like the weird mushy mess it becomes at the bottom of the mug.” He defends, mostly to himself and you grin lightly at him, kissing his cheek for him to know it didn’t actually matter; it kind of did but you refused to allow this big revolution destroy your beautiful relationship.

“Shouldn’t you be doing king duties?” You asked with raised eyebrows, sat cross-legged looking at T’Challa, who smiled softly.

“My duties as King is also looking after my people, you’re one of those people.” You blushed lightly and rolled your eyes.

You talked for hours, a few important came to talk to T’Challa, who left but would eventually come back to you. Lying with you in bed as you talked about random things, occasionally falling in and out of sleep, like you’re both doing now.

You feel a soft pat on your arm, you blink your eyes lazily open and look to see T’Challa waking you, and then you burst out into laughter. Aziza had returned and was laying on top of T’s head, sleeping contently, you laughter turned into fits of giggles as T’Challa just sighed.

“My two kitty-cats,” you curled into T’Challa who tried to get comfortable with your cat on his head and you curled against him. The life of a king.

(Sorry, it’s kinda rubbish. I am not really comfortable writing T’Challa, I think after I’ve seen his movie I’ll have a better understanding of him. I hope this is somewhat readable and okay. - Rosalee)

Tagging list: @girl-next-door-writes @22ifyoukeepmenextoyou  @t3-daria-todo@sebby-staan @skylark50 @thegoddamnfeels @gillibean9 @sergeantjamesbarnes107th @full-of-sins-not-tragedies @fxcknbarnes @broncos5soslover @say-my-name-assbut @fangirlwithasweettooth @buckyismybbz @phanalamatrash@charlotteblanden @wholockiand@momscapris @mashroom-burrito @firewolfkelly @winterboobaer

@mychocolatemints @avengingthesupernatural @usannika @itzelreader @tillytheinvisibleshadow @tomhollahd @imagining-marvel-soldier @oh-my-gravity @what-the-ducky-bucky @heyitssilverwolf @katiegrace122@newtmas-newtella @sillylittlemary  @buckyhawk @codexofwitches @the-the-sound-of-the-bees-blog @songsforsentences @leahneslen21 @whateveriwantworld @itsblehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh @cassiebarnes  @that-one-jewish-elf @tardispandagirl  

@theawkwardone-0002 @djpaige13paige @thewinchestersbabe @majestic-squad  @fangirlextraordinaire713 @stevesmylove82 @mrporkstache @t0kistar @marvelousmimi @shadyweeny @thequeenofgood @calursocute @tomitheavenger @casey-anne-j @ohmoveoveralohomora@grass-is-not-green @hiphoppery  @imnotinsanehunny @myonlyloveisblade @shamvictoria11  @castiels-fave @zootycoon1o1 @fangirl1029 @itsilvermorny @angel34jolly-blog   @hellomissmabel @castellandiangelo @dividedwecantfall  @heyitsthatlouisdork @buckys-shield @heaven-bound-angel (I deleted the tags that wouldn’t work)

The Lesson (The Visit Pt. 2)

The Visit (Pt. 1)  The Quest (Pt. 3)  The Confrontation (Pt. 4)  The Confession (Pt. 5)

Ao3 Link

Aelin Ashryver Galathynius was out in a beautiful meadow, the wind in her hair, and her father and Rowan arguing behind her.

“You can NOT threaten to bite her because she does not have the ability to shift on command. She is only a child,” her father yelled.

“I can damn well do as I please,” Rowan yelled back.

“Have you ever trained a child? Has that ever occurred in your long existence?” Rhoe asked.

Aelin huffed from the rock she was perched on. She looked at the two men, the father that she loved dearly and the fae warrior she didn’t know anything about. The confession that she overheard Gavriel say last night made a lot of sense in the light of the day, but she still didn’t know how to get through to him. She was only seven and a little girl, he was centuries old and quite a bit intimidating for her to handle.

Keep reading

Best Christmas Present

Originally posted by ohparkjimin

words: 2951

pairings: jimin x reader

genre: fluff

warnings: fights

summary: You had the best present but you did not know what it was until it came flying past you.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!! This is my Christmas present to all of you because I love you all so dearly. I hope you had/have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

“I’ve been meaning to tell you something since I first saw you 2 years ago, I’ve fallen hard for you Y/N. Everything about you, i can’t get it out of my head, the way you laugh at my stupid jokes, the way your face lights up when you see christmas lights, the way you have such kindness in your heart for everyone in your life. You’re perfect for me, and i was wondering if you wanted to go out wit…………….”

Keep reading


True friend. 
Real friend. 
Friend Forever. 

After years of being guilty of using the above terms excessively, I have decided to use only the word ‘friend’ to describe those who I dearly love, adore and trust. 

Because you know what? 
A friend is real. 
A friend is true. 
If you have friends you can’t trust or be true with, they aren’t even your friends in the first place. 
If you have friends who bitch about you, make fun of you and mock you every chance they get, guess what? They aren’t your friends at all. 

These additional words take away from the actual meaning of the word friend. 
They take away from how important, beautiful and nurturing the relationship is in it’s innate form. 

About friends forever…
No relationship is forever and that doesn’t have to be a sad thing.

Inevitable Pt.1 (Philip x Reader)

Word Count: 1,676

Warnings:Angst, mild swearing

Authors Note:Guess who’s back! I missed you guys dearly. This fic was supposed to be only one part, but I felt like splitting it in two because it was getting a bit long.LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF IT, AND BE SURE TO GIVE ME FEEDBACK AND REQUESTS FOR PART TWO IF THAT IS SOMETHING YOU ARE LOOKING FOR. LOVE YALL.

Not Requested. technically, but I love writing for philip so much that it is always something in the back of my mind, so its kinda requested by me. if you haven’t noticed all of my philip fics so far are not requested because its all shit that i randomly think about. but no its not technically requested.

Part 2


You woke up with a heavy heart knowing what lay ahead of you. No matter how much you had dreaded the day, lived in the moment, all of it lead up to today. It was the last day of school and it was inevitable.

In many ways, having an older boyfriend had its benefits. He had more experience than you and always looked out for you- although sometimes he could be over protective, you found it awfully cute. The part where it fell short was when he got to leave high school and you didn’t. You lingered in bed trying to forget about what lay ahead of your relationship before finally getting enough motivation to get dressed.

Everybody had warned you about this. Everybody had told you that high school romances should stop where they start- in high school. You got into the relationship not expecting to last more than a few months. But those months turned into years and your heart betrayed your mind. You never planned to fall in love with him, but you did.

You sat outside on your front steps twiddling your thumbs when you heard a car pull into your driveway. You couldn’t stop the smile that spread on your face as you picked up your bag and headed for the car.

“Hey babe” Philip said getting out of his seat and jogging around the front of the car to open the passenger door for you. You pressed a kiss on his cheek.

“Hi.” You smiled before you graciously took a seat. He closed the door and made his way back to the driver’s seat.

“How’d you sleep?” He asked, backing out of the driveway.

“Great.” You lied to him, suppressing a yawn. He turned to you with a smile and put his hand on your thigh. His thumb rubbing gentle circles on your bare leg.

“Are you ready?” He asked, his voice gentle.

You could only respond with a slight laugh because you weren’t. You weren’t ready at all.

You avoided Philip all day taking obscure hallways and going out of your way to miss him in the hallways. Maybe if you stopped seeing him, it would hurt less. But hurt was inevitable.

The day passed too quickly but lunch still crept up on you. You closed your locker and jumped back when you saw Philip standing there with a sheepish grin on his face. You’d miss seeing his smile.

“I’m sorry did I scare you?” He laughed as he snaked his arm around your waist. You laughed with him as you rested your head on his chest.

“I haven’t seen you all day, are you avoiding me?” He asked jokingly but you knew he was serious in the way his eyebrows knit together.

“No I just had to run a few errands for my teachers” You lied once more smiling up at him.

You felt him relax, resting his head on top of yours.

“Oh… well I missed you.” He said sheepishly, almost embarrassed to admit it.

On any other day you would have shot back with a witty response of how it had only been a few hours. But it wasn’t any other day.

“I missed you too” you said sincerely. Because you meant it.

“Let’s go get some food” he said as he led you to the parking lot.

You two sat in the school parking lot after a quick run to the nearest supermarket.

“Ready?” Philip asked, pulling his keys out of the car.

You eagerly nodded and got out of the car, heading back to the school’s entrance when you spotted an empty picnic table.

“Let’s not go inside today.” You said to Philip who was a few steps ahead of you.

“What?” He said as he turned on his heels to see you heading towards the empty picnic table. He quickly followed you there, setting the plastic bag on the table and taking a seat.

“You don’t want to go in today?” He asked pulling out your sandwich from the bag and handing it to you.

“No. I want it to be just us.” You shyly admitted.

You glanced up to see him stupidly smiling and unwrapping his own food.

“Me too.” He said too quietly for you to hear.

When lunch ended you two reluctantly got up and made your way back into the school.

“So I’ll see you after school?” Philip checked in with you. You nodded in response, giving him a quick peck on the lips before splitting ways just as the bell rang.

When the final bell rang, it felt as if everything was in slow motion. This was what everything had led up to. Your feet were heavy as you drifted down the halls occasionally stopping to talk to friends- stalling. Once you made your way outside, you saw Philip leaning against his car waiting for you. Your heart fluttered against your will and you couldn’t stop the smile that made up half of your face. You walked over to him just as he looked up to see you.

“Hey. How was your last-”

You shut him up by grabbing his face and planting your lips onto his in a hungry kiss. He stumbled back a bit but quickly began to kiss back. One of his arms wrapping around your waist, his other hand holding your cheek. You pulled away first.

“Whoah.” Was all Philip could say. “What was that for?” He asked, trying to regain his composure.

“You graduated! Congratulations!” You smiled at him. The truth was you knew it would be the last time you kissed him for a while.

“I should graduate more often.” He chuckled. “Let’s get you home kiddo.” He said getting in the car.

The car ride home was quiet. More quiet than you would have liked. But it was not an awkward quiet. It wasn’t because you didn’t know what to say, or you didn’t have much to say. It was because you were relishing the moment, trying to remember what it felt like to have his hand on your leg. The stupid smiles he’d give you at every red light. The soft sound of his favorite album coming out of the speakers. You’d steal glances at him when he was focused on the road and tried to memorize every tiny detail on his face.

Before you knew it you were pulling into your driveway. Philip parked the car and turned to you.

“So are you doing anything this afternoon? I think we’re much due for a date.” He wiggled his eyebrows and you cracked a smile. He could make you smile in any situation, even in this.

“We need to talk Philip.” You said, turning serious again.

“Um… ok” he said, the nervousness evident in his voice. He turned off the engine and took off his seatbelt to face you.

You took a deep breath. You were doing this for him. You didn’t want to be selfish. You wanted him to be happy.

“We need to break up.” You breathed out in a barely audible whisper.

“What?” Philip questioned his hearing more than you.

“We- we need to break up.” You said a little bit louder, your voice cracking at every other word.

“Y/N, I- I don’t know what I did but-”

You cut him off. “It’s not your fault Philip. I- we need this.”

“How do you know what I need?” His voice rose, and you shrank in your seat.

“For gods sake Philip, you’re going to college. Were you planning to drag your stupid high school girlfriend with you?”

The look on his face answered for him.

“This” you said pointing between you two “this is immature to bring to college. You’re going to meet so many people out there when I’m not with you and I don’t want to stop you from having the best life you could live. I don’t want to stop you from finding the one. I don’t want you to feel guilty for falling in love with somebody. Somebody who can be so much more than I ever was. Somebody who you can picture in your future.” You said. You didn’t realize you were crying until Philip wiped away a tear with his thumb.

“But I see you in my future Y/N. I know you’re the one. Let’s get married Y/N. Run away with me. I’ll stay in state for college. Just please Y/N, don’t leave me.”

“Don’t change your dreams for somebody like me Philip. I’m trying not to be selfish. I’m trying so hard to give you everything that I possibly can and if that includes me having to give you up then I will. I will because I love you and I can’t bear to see you settle for anything less. I will because you deserve it.” You tried to explain to him. Explain that you weren’t doing this for you but for him.

“But I’M selfish. Goddamnit. I want yOU.” His voice cracked and and you felt your heart crumble into a million pieces.

“Please Philip. Don’t make this harder than it has to be.” You said in a whisper. He turned forward so he was facing your garage. “I’m trying to help you.”

“I don’t need your help. I need you” he said, his jaw clenched looking straight forward.

You knew his stubborn nature. You knew he would never accept what the outcome of this conversation would be. You knew he needed time. You leaned over and used your hand to gently turn his head toward you. He was crying and you wiped a tear away with your hand, and tucked a strand of his hair behind his ear. You leaned in and kissed him gently, his lips feeling hot against yours.

“Don’t forget about me.” You said as you opened the car door and made your way into your house. You waited until you were alone in your room to break down in tears. You had to be strong for him, and now he was no longer yours.

Some Winter-Eruris I’ll probably never finish…

I really want to try and do a ‘proper’ pic with actual coloring that has some kind of background and is more than dumb chibi-jokes (though I love them dearly)…but because I know I’m a lazy shit with no real drive I’ll share what I have with you or it will probably get lost :)

What I DO indeed intend to finish are the requests in my inbox…I just lacked inspiratiom for a bit :)

‘wondering if I dodged a bullet or lost the love of my life’ is a lyric that hits way to close to home. I can’t even express how much i love this, because earlier this year I lost a person out of my life, someone who I loved dearly. I question every single day if it was for good reason, it it was meant to happen, or if I truly lost the love of my life. It doesn’t make sense and losing someone you love hurts like hell. it doesn’t make it easier to know you’ve felt this way @taylorswift, but its nice to know that I am not alone in this situation. love you tremendously .


Snufkin and Moomintroll. [2/?]

“About what I said before… you know, not going back to Moominvalley? Well I am. I’ve missed Moomin and all my friends.”

― Snufkin

helping Chris Evans shave would include

Originally posted by your-kylie-me

  • waking up to Chris kissing your neck
  • him smiling when he notices you’re awake
  • “good morning, beautiful”’
  • him pulling you into his embrace
  • putting your head under his chin
  • kissing his jaw
  • your fingertips wandering on his hairy cheeks
  • him kissing your fingers
  • “i like your scruff”
  • “well too bad because it needs to go away today”
  • “you wouldn’t dare”
  • “i’m sorry, love, but Cap can’t have a beard”
  • “maybe he decided to change his style, you know, wearing all leather and stuff, growing a beard, dating Buck-
  • “urgh here we are again. you ship stucky more than you ship us”
  • “it’s absolutely true”
  • getting up to make breakfast
  • him hugging your from behind as your making pancakes
  • him moving his cheek against yours
  • feeling his scruff on your skin
  • leaving small kisses on your skin
  • turning around and kissing him passionately
  • your hands on his cheeks
  • eating your breakfast while sitting on his lap
  • “want to help me shave, love?”
  • “why would i want to help you kill something i love so dearly?”
  • “because you love me more?”
  • “good point”
  • putting some shaving cream in your hand
  • rubbing your hands together
  • him kissing your neck
  • his soon-to-be-gone beard tickling you
  • “i feel like a mother who’s about to kill her son”
  • applying the shaving cream on his beard
  • taking the razor
  • slowly and gently shaving a small section of his beard
  • him giggling
  • “you’re so cute when you’re concentrated”
  • working on another section
  • “i’m so sorry”
  • “who are you talking to?”
  • “your beard”
  • washing his face with warm water
  • pat drying it
  • taking his face in your hands
  • nuzzling your face against his smooth cheeks
  • “it’s so soft”
  • him pulling you closer
  • “but i like you better when you have a beard”

Hope you all had an amazing Christmas guys!!

I’ve had such a good time here at home, it’s been nice to see family and hang out with old friends, I’ll be coming back tomorrow so gifs and regular content will resume then!

Had an unfortunate moment though. A family member of mine was involved in a very bad fire and he was engulfed in flames. He was put into an induced coma and he has very severe burns to his face but all his organs are lucky to be working.

I say it every year but the doctors and nurses who work on Christmas Day are worth the universe and beyond. Without them, someone who I love very dearly could have been taken.

I hope you’ve all had good holidays whether you celebrate Christmas or not, because you all deserve so much happiness and love, and if you haven’t got that yet, just know that I love and appreciate every single one of you. ❤️

Being conceited

Someone the other day told me that I seem conceited. They took it back, but it’s been nagging at me ever since. My absolute worst fear, as long time followers know, is that I’ll come off conceited. It’s been difficult enough having people call me popular or tumblr famous, because I just don’t want to go there. I’m smart, I know that, and I’m social, but I don’t think I’m better than anybody else. I love you dearly for your kind messages and support. But I don’t think I’m gorgeous, or brilliant, or altruistic, or popular, or perfect. I think I’m lucky.

I told my mom that they said that and she laughed and said “if only they knew.” I guess it’s hard sometimes, when you’ve fought tooth and nail to reach this level of confidence, and you’re told that it’s conceited. It’s like…should I not be confident then? I mean, I really truly don’t consider myself superior to anybody. And I hate hate HATE that this person said that. Now every conversation I have with them I feel so self conscious because I’m scared I’m gonna say the wrong thing and come off conceited.

When people say and do things like that it’s a combination of “screw you” and “oh my god I have failed myself.” It’s a trivial thing to get hung up on. But I hold myself to a high standard and being told that I’m conceited was like a punch in the stomach. It physically hurt.

Oh well. You can’t let others’ words define you or dictate who or how you are. If I say something and they think it’s conceited, too bad. I’m true to myself and my beliefs and those who matter won’t see me as anything but Edye, just Edye, not conceited or perfect or anything else. “Edye” as an adjective.

I will say that if I ever seem that way, I apologize. I feel terrible if I do, if anybody out there has perceived me as snobby or stuck up. I’m not. Like I said, I’m lucky. Every kind message I receive is met with as much disbelief as the first one. Every gift I receive is as shocking as if I’d never gotten one before. I don’t take anything or anyone for granted, ever. I’m lucky to be who I am, not because I’m perfect, but because I’m safe, healthy, strong, resilient, and, well, Edye. I’m loving. I’m happy. That’s all I could ask for.

You do you, my friends. Do what you feel is right, and spread the love. We could all use a little extra.


This blog turned one year old recently + 2k16 is almost over finally + is almost everyone’s fav season of the year, so I thought I’d make a small/quick follow forever for my favorite people! I love you all, thank you for being my friend // or just plain sticking around following me for so long! I hope you all can have a peaceful end of the year and that 2k17 do your good <3

A special mention to Mel ( @ofaddisoncarvers ) you’r such an amazing human being and I’m so grateful for knowing you and having you as a friend! I love you so much!

To some amazing writers and friends: (who I love dearly and I’m very thankful for specially for putting up with my great slow/lazy ass)

@ofthxrnsandrxses, @stardustion, @dispatcherwrites@piperhvlliwell, @padaleckiwrites@rielrps, @zombiexwrites, @tin-writes, @kalie-writesl, @janeyrps, @crystalreedwrites, @xkatiewrites, @merrittrps​, @writelike-taradactyl

  • To Kristen ( @thefirstarchitect ) because between her curiosity and constant hc’s I was finally able to make the decision of opening @edenshq + I am very thankful for her help + she’s a really great person
  • And another special mention to Jewels, I know she’s no longer part tumblr but she’s an amazing person and I hope that if you take a quick look to my blog any time soon you can see this (ily and miss you!)
  • Also a quick one to everyone on the @slowroleplayersnet!

And more amazing people (mutuals / followers / people I enjoy having on my dash)!

@octomoosey​, @littledhamplr, @lindseymorgan, @iceackles, @chloebenben, @swaenlake, @alyxofrp, @setthgecko, @vanessaiivves, @wiscowrites, @azianxpersuasionwrites, @poulterwrites, @lianaliberatcs, @frostborn, @silentsam, @natashkabarnes, @juleswrites, @karlasouzawrites, @aintnoyou, @lishs1x1, @samanddeaninpanties, @kctmcnamara, @jordanbakerwrites, @queenchiddy, @jamrps, @orphanwrites, @sophiabushrps, @tabithamuses, @rebeccabreeds,  @rcmeomontague, @the-looosers, @valkyrianwriter, @montaguewrites, @spn-idjits-guide-to-hunting, @jaredpadaleckis, @dukhannes, @lunaxwrites, @sapphireroleplays, @disappointedwrites, @nyssaalghuls, @sylviaplathwrites, @scamander–writes, @dameronhoewrites, @sadserotonin, @sevenwrites, @ghostling

To all my LGBTQA, Black, Muslim, immigrant, Mexican, ANY POC, ANYONE, I’m sorry this nation has let you down. it’s let me down. All we can do now is be strong and take care of each other. Four years is nothing. Ain’t no sweat. and in two years, we will vote again to make our voices heard in the Mid-Term elections. I want to hear nothing negative, from those of you will immediately yell and scream. You voted for a man who hates people like me. A Pansexual woman who loves a Trans partner dearly. who has friends and family who could, potentially, be affected by this in the future.

I’ll keep up some hope. We’ve dealt with some shit in our lives, no matter how young or old we are. Right now, we just gotta back each other up. Protect your friends, and family, because people WILL act like the trash they are and hurt, harass, or kill people we know and love. That was proven in the last year, and it’s only gunna keep proving itself.

I’m here for you guys.

Cold Eyes, Colder Shoulders (Avengers x Reader)

Hey! Soooo that last fic? You guys are AMAZING! I will never reach that level again so please forgive me haha! Honestly I love each and every freaking one of you!<3 

For this next one I got a request for a fic but with all the avengers reactions so I’m hoping I can do the request justice because it’s super awesome and different than my usual fics! If you requested this and you don’t like it please let me know and I’ll try to fix it!(: 


Base after base, country after country, realm after realm the Avengers were searching everywhere and were continuously coming up empty handed. What was so important that every other mission was being ignored? You. 

You had been missing for about a month now and the team was distraught. You had been an Avenger since the Battle of Sokovia and every one on the team loved you dearly. You had forged special connections with them all and now that you were gone they were all kind of lost. That’s why they had to find you.

No enemy could be ruled out as everyone on the team knew you were their weakness and everyone and anyone could be after you. That’s why they had all split up and were scouring the universe looking for you.

Thor was running between realms with some help from Loki. Sam and Rhodey were looking into sketchy military personnel. Tony and T’Challa were cracking down on business and political world leaders. Natasha and Bruce were going into the undergrounds of countries on every continent. Clint and Director Fury were keeping close eyes on all of SHIELD’s known enemies. The Maximoff twins, Vision, and Scott were stationed between Avengers Tower, Avengers Base, and your old house all waiting for you to come back to them. 

Every day they searched for you. And every day they didn’t find you felt like another little piece of them died inside. 


It was Bucky and Steve who finally called in a lead. They had been racing around the world crashing HYDRA bases at record speed when they finally found a lead to your location. They had run down a facility when they caught sight of a folder with your picture in it. The only other things the folder contained were a location and a list of words which made Bucky’s stomach turn as he realized their purpose. 

“We have to find her Steve. They’ll kill her. They’ll kill the most precious human left on this earth.”

“We will Bucky,“ Steve promised, opening the folder and lowering his voice as he looked at your picture, “We’re coming for ya doll. Hold on.” 


It took less than 32 hours for the Avengers to assemble. Each one was prepared to do whatever necessary to save you. All their hearts pumped with adrenaline and stomachs twisted with anticipation. To see you safe once again and to hold you in their arms. That’s what they wanted. What they needed. 

The jet ride over there was tense and felt like an eternity. No one spoke as they feared the worst and quickly tried to hush their inner thoughts for being so negative. The second the quinjet touched the ground the team was gone and on the offense. 

The fight lasted about three minutes before the ground was littered with fallen HYDRA agents. Parts of the base were on fire and the Avengers stood huddled around a room marked with your name. Everyone was scared to open the door, afraid of what they’d see inside. But eventually Tony couldn’t take it anymore as his shaking hands threw open the door.

A plain grey room laid on the other side. Grey walls, a grey concrete floor, and a grey bed which held your sleeping frame under grey sheets. 

Pietro was the first one in as he sped past the others to kneel next to you. His hand lightly touched your shoulder as he whispered a desperate, “Printesa?” 

You sat up slowly and turned to face the anxious superheroes as they all filed into your room. Their faces held a wide array of emotions from pure relief to utter confusion. Why weren’t you happy to see them? 

Your face had remained stoic as you sat on the edge of your bed and studied the people who had previously been considered family. Much like the bare walls your face was free of any emotions. It was starting to unnerve some of the Avengers as they stepped closer. 

“Why are you here?” Your question stopped them in their tracks and Pietro’s hand, which had remained on your shoulder, pulled away like you had burned him.

“Little Bird we’re here to bring you home,” Clint’s voice was soft but firm, thinking you were just scared and confused after being hostage so long. 

“But I am home.” Your head tilted to the side as they all looked shocked. Bucky fled the room while everyone else tried to keep their breathing in check. Of all the possibilities they had prepared for none of the Avengers were prepared for this. 

“No baby girl, back to the Tower with us where you belong,” Tony’s brown eyes looked broken as he reached out to stroke your cheek but you jerked away.

“I belong here though.”

“Listen Bitsy Spider I know it’s confusing, but they tricked you,” Nat’s voice was quivering as she tried to sooth you. 

However, before Natasha could continue any further Bucky burst back through the door and threw a manila folder onto the floor, letting the contents scatter across the room. “You lied to us!” His metal hand went up to point an accusing finger at you, but T’Challa threw up his hand and pierced Bucky’s arm through with his claws. 

“Do not touch my Queen.” T’Challa warned with an even tone that Bucky barely even registered as he simply yanked his arm free and continued to stare down at your still blank face. 

“You lied to me,” Bucky’s jaw was clenched, his nose twitching and his eyes welling up with tears he fought not to shed. He swallowed down the crack he could feel rising in his throat as he raised his voice.”To us! You sat there for years and pretended to be something you weren’t!”

“Bucky what in the hell are you talking about?” Sam asked defensively. He had fought the soldier before and was willing to do it again if Bucky continued attacking you like this. 

“She’s a HYDRA experiment. A blank slate that can absorb a person’s power and personality.”

“We were HYDRA experiments too Barnes. That does not mean (Y/N) is evil!” Wanda’s hands were starting to glow red with anger.

“No. It doesn’t,” Bucky agreed. His icy stare had never left your blank cold one. “But using that power to get close with the Avengers and give all their information to HYDRA does.”

“What?” Bruce whispered feeling more confused than the first time he had Hulked out. “Bucky that’s crazy. (Y/N) would never-”

“Agent Barnes is correct.” You finally stood up as your even voice sent the Avengers into a deeper state of shock. “I was given a power strong enough to put me on SHIELD’s radar and a personality sweet and luring enough to draw each and every single one of you in. After getting the information required I returned home and HYDRA wiped me clean for my next assignment.”

“So we were just another assignment to you?” Rhodey asked, glad he was in the suit to keep him upright.

“Don’t spend too long caring about what you were to me. I won’t about you.” You blinked calmly as you tore the teams world apart. Everything had been a lie, and now they didn’t know what to do. As they all stared in hurt at your uncaring face Thor turned on his heel and walked away not sparing another look back.

“Thor where are you going?” Vision asked, calling attention to the blonde god trying to make a hasty escape before his emotions could get the better of him.

“I am leaving. I cannot harm someone whom I care so deeply about. If you wish to bring justice then it shall have to be without me.” His red cape whipped out behind him as he continued to take large steps away from the scene. 

“I have died once before and the pain I feel now is just as strong. Count me out as well,” Pietro muttered, looking deep into your eyes one last time before seeing how truly dead they were inside, then speeding away.

“There’s some blood even I don’t want on my hands,” the tears were falling freely now as Natasha made her escape, Clint saying nothing as he crossed his arms over his chest to hold himself together just long enough to get back to the jet. 

“I thought I was going to be fighting bad guys. I didn’t sign up to fight loved ones,” Scott didn’t even bother putting his helmet back down as he shuffled away wondering how he was going to break the news to Cassie. 

“I can’t even read the thoughts going through her head,” Wanda whispered with tears in her eyes. “The (Y/N) we knew is already dead.” Vision followed the sobbing Sokovian girl and wondered what exactly the aching in his chest was. 

“I fill one hole in my chest just to get a new one,” Tony flipped his helmet down before flying off, Rhodey following quickly behind with defeated eyes.

“There is no hatred deep enough to cover the love which once ran through my veins,” T’Challa’s somber voice echoed around the quickly emptying room before he walked out with his head hanging unusually low..

“I’ve lost enough people I loved at the doing of my own hands. It’s not a mistake  I plan to keep making,” Steve seemed to be in a daze as he and Sam left Bucky alone with you in the blank grey room.

“Are you going to try to kill me now Agent Barnes?” Your voice was as cool as if you were discussing the weather. The air was quiet save for the sound of fire burning in the near distance as you stared him down waiting for his response.

“I just need to know if any of it was real,” Bucky’s blue eyes begged for something deep inside of you to snap. For you to remember who you were just like he had so he could take you back home and everyone could stop being so damned lost. So he could once again stop being so damned lost.


Bucky caught his breath in his chest as it expanded painfully to the point of implosion. He gave a brief nod and went to walk away, unable to look at the hollow shell of the woman he once loved.

“Wait!” You called as he reached the door frame and lingered in it, not looking back. “My name. My name was real.” 

And with that he was gone. Along with the last sense of warmth you had felt in your bones when the Avengers had first burst into your room. Your brain made the logical connection that the fire that had been ravaging your home base had finally died out, but you knew. Somewhere deep inside you knew that the closest thing you were ever going to get to a family had just walked away and they were never going to think twice about you again. 


I think I broke my own heart with this one guys…. but I hope you liked it and like always I’m sorry it’s kinda late! I should be catching up on requests though so!

As usual Requests, Ships, and Preferences are all OPEN!  The list is getting longer though (YAY!) so they should be coming more frequently (let’s hope) but there may be a slight wait (like that wasn’t the case before right?). 

Have a great day and send me love!^^^