because i just realised


“There’s a scene at the very end of episode four between you and I. And I remember when I read that scene it gave me goosebumps. […] There’s a little moment where you’re in the garage and just before the lights go out and you say ‘You wanna know his name? Ask him yourself.’ And I just remember thinking ‘That’s the kind of show I wanna be in!’ That’s one of the coolest moments. It’s so badass. - Charlie Cox [x]


Yuzuru Hanyu + Worlds 2013-15 - Playing with Pooh

You were taught in Sunday School,
that battle was not beautiful.
They lied, or so you still believe.
For what else could he be,
when you look at him and see,
the most divine of any sin?
—  Maybe you’ve always been a solider, and maybe he’s only the war of what might have been | p.d

I started out composed when I was taking pictures, and then I just kind of… lost it because I realised that I don’t take pictures with my scar out in the open very often.

I’ve got a pacemaker (80 beats per minute paced 60-70% of my existing hours) due to a rare genetic disorder—a pacemaker is not an ordinary occurrence for said disorder, most people with it live long healthy lives (minus the arrhythmia), but my heart just doesn’t work like it’s supposed to, and in November my heart rate exceeded 300 beats per minute six times, triggering cardiac shocks to keep me from going into cardiac arrest and dying and permanently ruining the delusion that I am immortal.

I don’t really know what else I want to say, once I’m past facts. I’m still coming to terms with the fact my heart, which is viewed as the very thing that makes us human, can’t beat properly on its own. I’m trying to stop being so mad that people want to treat me like I’m fragile because they mean so well and I’m trying to not fall into a gaping pit of self-pity and I’m really trying to convince myself that I am grateful for this ugly scar and what lies under it but it’s really hard. I just want to live and this scar is both a reminder I am doing that and a reminder of why I shouldn’t be here.

Sometimes, not often but sometimes, this scar reminds me that I have cheated death and I will do it again.

(Ah, and this is fine to reblog; she/her pronouns please!)
  • me & my little sister:*watching s2 of the 100*
  • clarke & lexa:*make out*
  • my little sister:that's not very realistic
  • me:why not?
  • my little sister:clarke likes boys
  • me:you can like both, you know
  • my little sister:really?
  • me:yeah. i like both.
  • my little sister:oh, okay
  • and this, kids, is why representation is important

Never give up.. Dreams can come true.

The last few months. I have been suffering badly for depression, anxiety and a behavioural disorder. I’ve been off work, picked up bad habits. Hidden from my friends.. All sorts of bad really. I was planning on cancelling my taping vacation due to it all.

Despite every low blow, every inch of self hate and low self criticism.. I pushed myself to come out here to LA, to see my friends and face my fears. Because I needed just that to make me stronger and realise the potential.

And look what happened. Over coming a fear resulted in living one of my dreams. Getting on set and free beer 😂

My point tumblr. No matter how bad things get. No matter how much you feel you can’t achieve something.. Just do those things that bring you happiness. Now matter how hard and no matter the personal battle. Just do it.

No I’m not fixed or better. Far from it in fact. But that’s for me to address.

Things do become better over time.

Sending everyone here all my love and positive vibes ❤️


hi I’m Abbie (lawlietvevo) and this is a little late for #noshameday but… my other post just didn’t quite cover what I haven’t seen in the tag.

So I was diagnosed with aspergers when I was 4 from a worker at the preschool I went to when she went on a course about stuff like that and noticed I fitted all of the ??symptoms?? of it. she told my mum who took it really well since she noticed my habits too and just accepted me for who i was. - unfortunately- It went no further and I did not receive any help nor was it brought up with any of my teachers which lead to so many difficulties with some and I really hate to say this now because looking back on it I have only just realised what they were doing, but a few even victimised and bullied me for my behaviour which wasn’t alerted because of my reluctancy to talk about school (or anything) as I was also bullied from a few other students as well when I was younger, and also my neighbour.

Leaving primary school and going to secondary was such a huge improvement for me (strangely?) as I was no longer the child who needed extra support and did no work and was actually starting to get a real education when I left the poisonous people and got new friends. Sadly it started to go downhill as I entered my gcse year but I’m getting better now and trying very hard to get at least a few Bs In my exams and maybe even an A since the recline in the beginning of the year fucked my grades up so bad and led me into a real bad state of mind which I’m still suffering from now

ON TOP of all of that, when I was 9 I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when my mum (who’s also diabetic) noticed it really early on and got me into hospital ASAP. it was a very hard time since my mum who got it when she was 11 knew what I was going to go through and really couldn’t handle it as my dad was also recovering from cancer.
The top photo is me last summer after I got so ill when my pump stopped working and I got into DKA (diabetic ketoacidosis) while at work so that I couldn’t stop being sick. this really is a shitty thing to have and the main reason I can’t do many jobs I would want to do :/

but to all my diabetic and autistic friends out there - I love u and I hope u are all well, even tho this is a little late


One of my dogs has been winking at me all night. The time for greatness has come.


Here’s the stuff that I got at the gem show the other day!

Pyrite [in matrix]
Bismuth [lab grown because i was running out of money]
Galena [gosh it’s so pretty]
Quartz [dang i love quartz crystals ok. simple but SO pretty]
Celestine [giant egg-shaped cluster of perfection]


The accent challenge because I’m procrastinating (shock horror)

Doing videos just makes you realise that:

 1) you’re way more of a loser than you originally thought 

2) you look nothing like you think you do in your head 

3) you sound nothing like you think you do in your head 

Chapter 28: Flashes

Summary: Ellie has figured out a way to communicate with Sam, but they still have to figure out what’s going on.

Wordcount: 3111

Warnings: None

A/N: Sorry this took forever. I was trying to write but got a bit blocked and then I finally binge-watched the last season of Glee (so many feels!). But it’s finished now. Enjoy Ellie being a big ol’ nerd.

Episode Guide: This happens between 3x04 and 3x05, but you can think of it as the fifth of several chapters that will cover one case.


Dean hadn’t got back to the motel yet. I found Sam sitting alone, still staring at his computer screen. He was perfectly set up for me to speak to him.

I decided to just go for it straight away. It was going to take me a while to communicate with Sam. I may have known Morse Code by heart, but he probably didn’t. I’d have to keep trying until he recognised that the flickering of his computer wasn’t random. Then I’d have to wait for him to figure out it was Morse Code. Then he’d need to look up how to understand me. Only then would I be able to actually get a message across.

I figured the most common phrase anyone knew was SOS. Three short signals, three long and then another three short. Bothering Sam with that repeatedly seemed like the best bet to help him recognise what was happening.

I went over to stand beside him. It would probably have been easier to actually stand where he was sitting, but there was a mental barrier that stopped me moving through him. It was too weird to be in the same place as someone else, but in different dimensions or planes or whatever it was.

I took a deep, hopeful breath and put my hand through the computer. Three quick, even flashes and the screen flickered, the three short bursts of “S”. Sam blinked. I had definitely gotten his attention. I put my hand in again, holding it three times as long each time. Three long bursts for “O”. Sam’s hand reached for his power cord. I kept going as he jiggled it, giving him the short signals of another “S”.

The danger was that Sam would assume his computer was malfunctioning so badly that he had to turn it off. Maybe I could get around that, though. If I did the same pattern with something else, he’d know it wasn’t the computer. I ran over to the light switch, and Sam looked up and around him as I gave him another “S”. I finished the S.O.S message and went back to the computer again.

I had definitely been smart to use the lights as well, because Sam was no longer looking at his power cord or fiddling with the computer to try and fix it. When I pulsed the message out with his screen again, he stared at it, frowning. I used the computer a third time, and then the lights once more.

Sam stood up, and turned on the tiny television. It was showing some crappy sitcom, but he muted that, and sat on the edge of Dean’s bed, watching the screen. I smiled. It had only taken five tries for him to realise that something was happening and that he needed to pay attention.

I went to the television and did the same thing again. Three dots, three dashes, three dots.

“Huh,” said Sam.

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anonymous asked:

I feel like Jason would be a hot young trophy husband. Like, that's what the rich ladies at all the high society galas call him.

I’ve been trying to figure out if this was directed toward the Wedding Planner AU or otherwise, but hey, both work. 

Because DAMN would Jason make an amazing Trophy Husband. He is a goddamn hot piece of work (tick), he is a feminist (big damn tick), he will back your plays (especially if they are hilarious so tick), so amazingly organised) and god damn does he look good in any position around your home (innuendo most heavily intended). 

Hell, even if he came out as bi/gay I feel like that would only increase the fervour for him because hey ladies, he could be your beard and be totally okay with it slash will play protective hubby whenever you need me.

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pokethetriforce replied to your photo “Nothing about this picture is good news. Remember when I was freaking…”

Also Ashura is far into your future. As far as the timeline goes he’s really close to the final boss level. Consider him the Spirit Temple in relation to kicking Ganondorf’s smarmy ass.

Oh good! So he’s literally forever away. I’m okay with this. I was about to start stress reading all of RG Veda at once just in case he was sooner than I was anticipating. (Though I really do need to actually just do that at some point. Along with everything else. Oh my god I’ve had X/1999 on my desk since before I moved houses. That was over half a year ago.)

pokethetriforce replied to your photo “Nothing about this picture is good news. Remember when I was freaking…”

You’ve never been so wrong before (not saying about what). The halo thing is a good catch though! That’s actually an interesting thing I never noticed. And reminder that Fai does/did live in a perpetually frozen country in the far north. Ice happens.

THIS IS ACTUALLY A BIT OF A RELIEF THOUGH. I’m so used to accidentally getting something right and then trying really hard not to figure out what it was. This is a lot less to think about. 

But yeah the ice shouldn’t have been as much of a surprise I suppose, and I have 0% science knowledge, but I was thinking more along the lines of whirlpools probably don’t freeze. I mean maybe they do? Does anyone know?

I’ve recently noticed a spike in ID badge sales and I only just realised this is probably because of con season. I thought I would make this post to implore you to order as early as possible to ensure it’s with you in time! I can rush deliveries but that only depends on me being able to get to the post office at any time and it gets very expensive very quickly. Essentially I would much rather avoid that.

Also if you plan on ordering for Red Dragon Con in october might be worth getting in early if you can. I don’t know when I’ll be getting more stock in.

I have BSHCI ones and FBI ones designed by me based on stills from the show.

Also! If you use my badge at a con tag me in a photo! I’d love to see! (#Idontfindyouthatinteresting on tumblr/instagram and @IDFYTI on twitter)