because i have so much to offer

There’s nothing quite like sitting in your car while hiccup sobbing because you realize how much a goddamned series of strokes in your noggin’ has effected many facets of your life.

I only did two chair massages today at an event I worked with a friend, and that’s all I could do.

Ten minutes of massaging two individuals has triggered my vertigo so severely that I had to sit half of the time I was there.

I cannot physically offer massage therapy services any longer, and that acknowledgement, and that reality shatters my heart.

I have assumed as much these last many months, but today it was like a slap in the face sort of realization.

It’s time to continue focusing all of my energy and intentions into my jewelry business, as well as my non-physical holistic modalities.

Massage and I just likely won’t ever get along anymore, and for whatever reason in this moment, that breaks my heart.

Thank you so much for the messages everyone, like seriously. It makes me feel so incredibly happy I have such supportive and kind people that follow me and can offer advice. I’m sorry I can’t respond to everyone, but it’s just because it was such a huge influx of love and support and I could spend days responding and thanking you all for your help.

I’m frustrated simply because my mom refuses to give up on her idea that I’ll become a doctor or lawyer or CEO. In the end, it’s her personal insecurities and lost dreams she’s trying to push onto me. She’s been depressed and unhappy for years and all of her depression has fallen on to me when she decides to manipulate me and lash out and tries to kill my dreams. I’m not who she wanted as a daughter, and she regrets it. She’s been abusive to me all my life, emotionally and physically, and I’m now at the cusp of 25 knowing what I want to do with my life and she refuses to accept it because it’s not something she can brag to her friends about.

But I don’t care.

I can see the future I can have, where I get to live with people I care about and we all contribute to making a difference. Where we all love and support each other for who we are and what we love. I’m not letting ANYONE take that away from me.

I have so many plans for the future and I know they’ll work out because I’ve worked so hard to build them up. It’s basically after taxidermy school and acquiring my license that I’ll be certified to do what I already love.

After I graduate I’m going to be doing a lot of prep-work for building up my shop. I’m re-branding under a new name and will have almost 2 and a half years worth of stock to start filling it with. There will be more consistent giveaways, streams, guides, and really anything I can do to give back to the community. And I’ll finally be moving out of my apartment into a home where I can continue to do consistent processing and build up a true business.

I’ve had an awful and stressful year with the only silver lining being my future plans and my friends, and the last thing I plan to do is give up on my own happiness to make someone who doesn’t love me for who I am happy.

So

I think you guys have noticed how much Natalya prefers blood offerings to food or other stuff. She believes that someone’s blood is much more valuable than food, because she thinks if someone willingly takes their own blood for a request, the deal bonds are stronger and a bit more…how do I say…real? I guess?

Advice from an hereditary witch’s grandmother: things a crone has to say

My witch of a grandmother gave me her beautiful encyclopedia on healing plants to celebrate Ostara!

I told her about my blog and she asked me to share some of her advice “for those lovely internet disciples of yours”.

No, Yeyé, that’s not how this works…

But hey! When the crone talks, you listen!

“A jar of glass keeps away envious spirits and people who want to hurt you.”

“Everything dead deserves to be honored.”

“Strings of seeds bring prosperity.”

“A stone in the windowsill is a soldier that keeps away thieves, but make sure it’s not a pretty rock cause they might steal it!”

“When you trim a vine, keep some branches by the door so all the hard work you’ve done doesn’t disappear in a single day!”

“When you’re old and can’t move so much anymore, keep a jar of seeds by the Gods so they can pick their offerings as they please.”

“I keep lavender by the computer because it helps me remember how to open Facebook. Lavender is good for memory. Tell your friends of the internet.”

“I keep the obsidian and the agathe geodes in front of the TV so there will be no bad news.”


So there you have it.

Advice from an authentic crone with over 70 years of Craft , Old Yeyé.

She wishes you all many blessings and love and hopes you are all well guided.

Happy new season from lucky Old Yeyé!

-Semiramis the Magpie Witchling

Milk and Honey // Rupi Kaur

Aries: “Our backs tell stories no books have the spine to carry”

Taurus: “Perhaps the saddest of all are those who live waiting for someone they’re not even sure exists”

Gemini: “I didn’t leave because I stopped loving you, I left because the longer I stayed the less I loved myself”

Cancer: “What is stronger than the human heart which shatters over and over and still lives”

Leo: “I will never understand why you held me if you were afraid of warmth, you should have known I was a fire”

Virgo: “The world gives you so much pain and here you are making gold out of it”

Libra: “I am water, soft enough to offer life tough enough to drown it away”

Scorpio: “If you were born with the weakness to fall you were born with the strength to rise”

Sagittarius: “I do not want to have you to fill the empty parts of me, I want to be full on my own”

Capricorn: “We began with honesty, let us end in it too”

Aquarius: “Your body is a museum of natural disasters can you grasp how stunning that is”

Pisces: “You treat them as if they have a heart like yours but not everyone can be as soft and as tender as you”

What she says: “I’m fine”

What she’s thinking: Honestly don’t bash cheritz for charging 300 hourglasses for V’s route (forcing you to pay for hourglasses) they try their best and do everything for their consumers like you don’t even know this type of unpaid play is legit unheard of in otome games and they offer totally plausible ways of getting hourglasses for the people who can’t pay and they gave us so many extra hourglasses with each update like I could totally get 300 without having to pay I’m just impatient and they also run ZERO ADS like they’re a miracle and a blessing, besides being one of the most revolutionary and intriguing ‘otome’ games in the history of 'dating sims’ they also are so personal with their audience and put so much work into everything they invented an entire new route just because everyone was begging for it and the voice actors put in LITERAL HOURS OF DIALOUGE and they make the entire app accessible for EVERYONE which no other otome game has ever done they ALWAYS make you pay but not mystic messenger like can you even believe it?? They put so much quality into their work but how are they even making money? The real cheap ones are us the consumers because we can’t believe we have to pay $.99 to unlock one route when most games would force you to pay upwards of $20 to experience the game. They have done so much I love them and they love us

How We Met AU's

You found me wandering lost around an Ikea. We’re both lost and I’m getting really scared so you built us a fort and now the employees are trying to get us out of it.

I’ve lost my dog and I’ve been searching for them all day now. You found me crying on the curb and offered to help. I have no idea who you are but thank you so much for helping.

Our group had a lip sync battle and you got up there and lip synced to Sexy Back and didn’t break eye contact with me. I’m both turned on and embarrassed.

You pepper sprayed me in the face because you thought I was your creepy ex. I’m mad but then I actually looked at you and said a cheesy pick up line so now we’re just staring at each other awkwardly, but my eyes still burn please help.

8

Dearest. There are no accidents and he would have found us one way or another. Everything comes full circle. Be grateful it was sooner rather than later. You’ll think it harsh of me to say so, but no explanation I offer will satisfy you. Please don’t be angry when I tell you that you seek resolutions and explanations because you’re young. But you will understand this one day. And when it happens, I want you to imagine me there to greet you, our lives stretched out ahead of us, a perpetual sunrise. But until then, there must be no contact between us. I have much to do, and you, my darling, even more. Please believe that I would do anything to see you happy. So, I do the only thing I can… I release you.

Gift for Harry

So, I taught my 5yo son how to make pot holders this week. When I asked him which colors we should us, he said rainbow.

Once it was done, he decided he wanted to give it to Harry who is his favorite singer. Now, I don’t exactly have Harry on speed dial, so I chuckled and asked him how we would get the pot holder to him. He shrugged and said, “You should ask your friends.”

So I did, and having the most amazing friends ever, @phd-mama and @littlebabyruth stepped up like the heroes they are. They are going to be at the Boston concert this weekend and have offered to take Ian’s gift and try to throw it on stage.

So Ian wrote a note to attach to the finished potholder.

I helped with some of the writing because that’s a lot of words for a kindergartner, but the message was all him.

So I wanted to let the world know what awesome people my friends are and to say publicly how much I appreciate them helping a 5 yo they’ve never met get his art project to his hero. Also, anyone who wants to signal boost this so maybe someone from Harry’s team will see it, thank you in advance,

My crazy wish is that the pot holders get to Harry and there is video of him reading Ian’s note. I asked Ian what he would do if this happened, and he said, “I would probabwy scweam and fall on the floor.” If he does, I’ll post the pics. 😉

If there is one positive thing I can say about the life I’ve had, it’s that it made me a better person. As much as I wish I’d had the happy carefree life everyone else seems to have had, I have to admit that it’s made me who I am – for the better, not just the worse. Every time I’ve been knocked down I’ve gotten back up and it’s a strength I gained from never having anyone to help me. So now when I see someone else who’s down and out, I offer them a compassionate hand because I know how it feels and I believe that in their darkest moments nobody should ever be alone. Empathy is a gift and I share it with others, but it’s a gift that comes with a terrible price that only those who possess it know… Because to empathize with someone’s pain, you need to have experienced it yourself and that is the hidden price that compassionate people have paid to be who they are. So as much as I wouldn’t want to go back and relive them all again, I wouldn’t undo my life’s painful experiences either because I know that ultimately I wouldn’t be the same person without them.
6

Carol (2015)Dearest. There are no accidents and he would have found us one way or another. Everything comes full circle. Be grateful it was sooner rather than later. You’ll think it harsh of me to say so, but no explanation I offer will satisfy you. Please don’t be angry when I tell you that you seek resolutions and explanations because you’re young. But you will understand this one day. And when it happens, I want you to imagine me there to greet you, our lives stretched out ahead of us, a perpetual sunrise. But until then, there must be no contact between us. I have much to do, and you, my darling, even more. Please believe that I would do anything to see you happy. So, I do the only thing I can… I release you.

-
Sit down buckaroos because I’m gonna share some historical insight with you because of ignorant people who are trying to discard the most badass character in all of feminist characters in musical theatre history and I won’t take that.
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Katherine Ethel Pulitzer was a real person - daughter of Joseph and Kate Pulitzer. So there’s fact number 1 to prove she was an actual living person in the 1800’s. Fact 2. When you say women weren’t journalists back then well you obviously have never heard nor read about Elizabeth Jane Cochran also known by her pen name “Nellie Bly”. She was the inspiration behind Katherine’s character in the first place. They basically merged the real Katherine with Nellie and created this character. Nellie Bly began writing for “The Pittsburg Dispatch” in 1885 and moved to New York City two years later to begin working at “New York World”. She was known for her investigative and undercover reporting, including posing as a sweatshop worker to expose poor working conditions faced by women. She earned her acclaim in 1887 when she went undercover at an asylum on Blackwell’s Island and posed as one of the patients to get the story and in turn had launched a full on investigation on the treatment of the institution and the well being of patients (which wasn’t a well being at all with neglect and physical abuse) in said facility. In 1889 she went around the world in a record-setting 72 days, 6 hours, 11 minutes and 14 seconds in attempt to break the faux record of Phileas Fogg, the fictional title character in Jules Verne’s novel “Around the World in 80 Days”. At the age of 18 (my age) she submitted a racy response to an editorial piece that had been published in The Pittsburgh Dispatch that made sexist statements towards women. The writer was Erasmus Wilson (known as the Quiet Observer or Q.O.) Nellie’s letter grabbed the attention of the paper’s managing editor, George Madden, who then offered her a position. She later published a book about the experience titled: “Around the World in 72 Days” in 1890.
-
So don’t you DARE tell me Katherine Plumber wasn’t a vital asset to these boy’s story. She’s more of an inspiration to me than ANY character I’ve read about. Nellie Bly is an inspiration who makes me want a writing career. I am very much like Katherine (in more ways than just having power bangs) and because of her I’ve learned to love myself. Because of her I can get through days when I’ve got a shit ton of Senior year homework knocking me down. Because of her I’m happier. Katherine and Nellie are huge inspirations to me and if you hate either one of them just unfollow me now. Because these two are my role models and always will be❤

Have fun being stranded in the Philippines.

Please be patient, the buildup to this is intense and long but the resulting revenge has probably put me on the Devil’s shortlist. (tl:dr at the end)

About 3 months before I finally quit, I was getting really pissed. Management was never in the office, the Owner couldn’t make up his mind about anything, and so many people were quitting that I ended up being the only Programmer/Developer in an office of about 50 people… for a company that received 95% of its business from online sales. People started taking credit for my work and I decided to quit. Looked around for jobs, found one pretty quickly, and put in my two weeks notice with a nice little note that simply said something to the effect of “I hereby resign, effective blah blah blah”.

Lo and behold the man who had in the last few days become my manager (we’ll call him Frank) instead of idk maybe promoting the only programmer in the company to the head of the development department, begged me to stay, promised me a raise, and told me about their new project and how he wanted me to be involved.

Keep reading

Imagine skyping with Jensen on your anniversary and him having a unique surprise for you.

“Hey, just hanging out on set here with the crew, the car… And a few friends.” Jensen turned the camera to show a group of people right behind him, making you giggle as you saw all the Supernatural fans on the background.

“Woooo!” they all cheered as Jensen waved at them, his eyes still focused on his phone’s screen and therefore you.

“You’re having all the fun there without me huh?” you put on playful frown “Shame on you.”

“Oh you know it’s never real fun without you here, sweetheart.” he grinned at you, winking.

“Just on our anniversary hm? You are a terrible boyfriend.” you tried to say as seriously as you could but it was impossible considering the adorable pout that appeared on his face. Why did you have to love him this much?

“I’m sorry, baby. You know I’d give everything to take the first plane and fly right there to you and give you on of the biggest hugs and kisses.” he sighed a little too sadly and you felt bad for bringing it up in the first place.

“Jens, I didn’t mean it like that. Come on, you know I was just kidding. I am thankful for every moment I spent with you on and off set. I know that you didn’t imagine it like this, but you had to do the extra shooting.” you shrugged, getting comfortable in your bed as you wrapped his flannel closer around you. It was some sort of comfort to be able to smell his scent days like this when he had to leave because he had extra scenes. You did have a role in Supernatural but much like Misha you didn’t have to spend so much time on set like Jensen and Jared.

“I know, I couldn’t skip this because otherwise I would break down but- this is out five-year anniversary. I had so many things planned and-” he bit his lip, turning around so that you could see the Impala again “I wanted us to do so many things today and I just- I screwed up, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, please.” you offered him a small but sad smile “We can do this another day, we’ll pretend it’s our anniversary and we can spoil each other as much as we want.”

“It’s just it won’t be the same. And I wanted you to know it today that-” he cleared his throat looking at the group of people again “Just wait, they have a little something for you.” he said a little excited, turning to show them again.

“Alright guys, you ready?” he asked as he got a loud “Yes” as a response.

“One, two-” he glanced behind him “Three!”

“I love you!” they all shouted in unison so that it sounded almost like oe voice and you bit hard on your lip, giggling softly.

“Oh Jensen, I know that already.” you felt your heart swell inside your chest “I love you too baby, very much.”

“I just needed you to know this today.” he whispered “Because things probably didn’t go as planned but I am still set on asking you today-” he took a deep breath, giving the guys a small nod.

“(Y/n)!” they all shouted in one voice, making you grin to yourself “Open the first drawer of your nightstand!” this was harder to say but they managed.

“Ok” you chuckled with a perplexed look on your face as you went for it. But you froze mid-movement when the only thing you saw was a small red velvet box.

“What…?” you whispered, trailing off, not paying attention to your computer as you took hold of it.

“Jensen what-” you tried to swallow the lump in your throat as you felt tears well up in your eyes.

“Open it, sweetheart.” his voice was rough as well, laced with emotion. Even if you didn’t look at him you could picture that nervous and cute smile on his face as well as his glossy eyes.

You did as told, still unable to look up from it as you trembling hands you attempted to open it. For some reason it seemed harder than you’d expect, your muscles refusing to do the simple task but when you actually opened it all air got knocked out of your lungs. Your eyes widened more than before and you could swear you felt a tear slip from your eye as your lips fell apart. You stared at the diamond ring for what felt like an eternity before managing to move your eyes and look back at the screen.

“Jensen…” your voice was barely above a whisper and whatever words you had in mind to say disappeared when you saw the four words on the screen.

“(Y/n)” he breathed out, giving you a nervous smile “I wish I was there to ask you this, but I am not going to waste this day when I planned to make it the best of your life. So I need to ask you one last thing-” he said breathlessly before glancing at them and giving them a nod.

“Will you marry me?” they all shouted in unison as they held boards with the words.

“Will you marry me, princess?” Jensen repeated the question in a whisper.

anonymous asked:

Hello, I'm the anon who's freaking out about being thrown into adulthood, and thank you for your previous help. 1.) How do I mamage/budget a minimum wage salary? 2.) I've never been great with any sort of organization, but would you mind teaching me about home organization and important paper organization?

Okay, so this post will be about budgeting on minimum wage, and later in the day I will also post about paper organization. Enjoy!

Budgeting on Minimum Wage

Overview

The average minimum wage in the US is $7.25/hr. Even working full time at 40 hours a week, that’s only a profit of $290 before taxes. This is not a fair living wage! You are worth way more than this amount! I strongly encourage you to start looking for another job that pays better, look for something around the $10-$15 range. 

While $7.25 is atrocious, thousands of people around the world support families on much less. If they can do it while supporting children, so can you! To live off a minimum wage budget you need to declare yourself independent. If your parents are still claiming you as a dependent YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO DO THIS. I also recommend that you have the highest amount possible taken out of your taxes so that you get money back from your state at the end of the year, instead of being in debt to them.

What I’ve done is come up with a budgeting plan based off some made up factors and my own personal experience.

Housing

1. City life. Forget about the city! Apartments located in cities can be three times as expensive as apartments in small towns or villages. On top of the extra expense, they’re much smaller and have less amenities included. I’d much rather live in a one bedroom apartment with a dishwasher and a conveniently located Laundromat, than a literal closet with no windows on a fifth floor walkup. Look for apartments twenty minutes to a half hour outside of your closest city. Now you have the close conveniences of a city, with none of those pesky city prices that your budget can’t handle.

2. College towns. Shop around and look at apartments by local colleges. Large colleges with have apartment complexes within walking distance of the school grounds. Landlords know that college students have less money (you might even be a college student yourself) and adjust their prices accordingly. Even apartments next to ivy league schools are priced this way, so don’t be discouraged by the institution’s “prestige”.

3. Locale. Your safety is more important than your bank account. It doesn’t matter if you live in Section 8 housing or in an affluent suburb. Some apartment complexes and neighborhoods are just safer than others. I live in a heavily populated and upper middle class suburb, and the first year I moved in, a drunk woman tried to throw a beer bottle at my car. Thankfully this is the only time this happened to me, but it made me feel unsafe in my environment. Before signing a lease, walk or drive around your prospective home’s neighborhood at night. Take in the atmosphere, and make sure it’s one where you could comfortably run to the local supermarket at 10:30pm and pick up toilet paper.

4. Roommates. Living on minimum wage requires that you find one or two roommates to help split the rent. The more the better! Get together with your more responsible friends, so at least you’re living with people whose company you enjoy. There are lots of “roommate wanted” forums and message boards for you to browse on the internet, but always bring a responsible adult with you before meeting a stranger. Please. Bring your mom if you have too.

Food

1. Low-spoon food. I created this post a few months ago which offers lots of suggestions about cooking and shopping on a budget.

2. Online recipes. Here are some of my favorite online Tumblr cookbook resources. 

3. I also regularly update my cooking on a budget tag. 

Misc Expenses

1. Gas. Shop around and find the cheapest gas in your area. Avoid gas stations next to colleges, highways, and in touristy areas. Look into getting as gas rewards card from your favorite supermarket. I get 10 cents off a gallon with Stop & Shop every time I do a big shop. 

2. Dollar store. Get to know your local dollar and bargain stores. You can buy everything from pots and pans to bed sheets there. These stores often sell bulk ramen for $1 and large cans of crushed tomatoes for 75 cents. That’s enough food for you to live off of for several days. When shopping, I make three grocery store stops to ensure that I spend the least amount possible on my pantry needs. I go Dollar Store, Stop and Shop, and then to my local organic grocery store. I’m going to make a list of things that I buy at Dollar Stores and things that I don’t buy at Dollar Stores soon!

3. Cable. We are living in the digital age- you don’t need cable television. Use Netflix or Hulu or whatever. It will save you tons of $$. 

4. Internet. As far as internet speed goes, if you’re living with roommates you will probably need a higher speed. Living by yourself, choose a lower one. Most internet companies offer large discounts to new subscribers. These typically only last a year, but will save you serious money. Make sure to take note of when this discount expires, and contact the company before it does. If you don’t, they’ll begin charging you the full amount without notice.

5. Verizon. I just want to take a moment to talk about how much I love Verizon because they have literally saved me so much money in the three years I’ve been with them. After you sign a contract with a new internet company, they charge you a bunch of ridiculous fees like “activation fees” and “installation fees”. I called Verizon and was like “I’m a poor college student, I can’t afford this” and they were like “don’t worry, we’ll waive the fee”. I signed a two year contract with them that saved me $80 on a high-speed internet bill per month (my price being only 50.99 a month). After the contract expired I call them and they put me on a month to month, keeping the price absolutely the same. TLDR- get Verizon if you can.

6. Utility. Get on a monthly budget with whatever utility company services your new apartment. Although it may seem like the cheaper option, paying the actual amount of electricity you spend per month is the more expensive. It’s also unpredictable, and a minimum wage budget won’t allow for it. See this for more info.

7. Amazon. I buy a lot of my beauty, cleaning, and cat products online. Amazon offers Prime shipping free for a year with a student email address, and then offers it at a greatly reduced price after the year. If you are a student, snap up that free deal ASAP. If it’s in your budget, I’d greatly recommend investing in Amazon Prime.

8. Saving money. It’s so important to attempt to break way from the “paycheck to paycheck” vicious cycle. Living this way does not allow for emergency expense money, and trust me, sometime soon you will need emergency expense money. Your cat might get sick or your car may die, whatever it is, it’s always smart to have at least $500 squirreled away. I’m gonna level with you, things have been tight for my budget and I haven’t been able to save anything for the past three months. But this month I will!

Example Budgets

Full Time

Working with the $7.25/hr and 40hr/week model, here’s an example budget for living on minimum wage. That’s $1,160 a month without taxes.

Housing: Let’s say you’re sharing an apartment with two close friends, the rent being $1,500 without any amenities. That rent split three ways is $500 each.

Gas I commute twenty minutes every day, and I drop about $20-$25 a week on gas. That’s $100 on gas a month.

Food: I do one big shopping a month with my boyfriend. We drop around $180 and that’s including toiletries and soap and stuff. So maybe you’ll spend about $100 a month on all your shopping needs.

Cable/internet:  Hopefully you took my advice and skipped cable. Let’s say you’re paying around $50 per month for internet. Split three ways that’s $17 each.

Laundry: Hopefully you’re not like me and are only spending around $20 on laundry per month.

Random expenses: Because there always are some. Let’s just tack on another $100.

With everything added up, you still have around $290 left before taxes! That money can go into a savings account, and after several months, you’ll have that $500 worth of emergency money saved.

Part Time

Working with the $7.25/hr and 25hr/week model, here’s an example budget for living on minimum wage. That’s $725 without taxes.

Housing: In this case, you need to look for apartments in the $800-900 range. In my area, one bedroom apartments go for around $1000, so you may need to get creative with your roommate (I don’t think you could have more than one roommate in this situation). Buy dividers to split the bedroom or studio in half! Let’s say your rent is $850 with nothing included, that’s $425 each.

Gas You’re still looking at a large gas bill per month, so it may be more inexpensive to ride a bike or use public transportation. Let’s say you use public transportation, and spend around $50 a month on that. Or maybe you and your roommate can split gas expenses and share a car?

Food: Pinch those pennies! Use some of those budget cookbooks I linked above to help you cook healthy and delicious meals for under $4 each. See if you can only spend $80 a month on groceries.

Cable/internet:  Hopefully you took my advice and skipped cable. Let’s say you’re paying around $50 per month for internet. Split two ways is $25 each.

Laundry: Hopefully you’re not like me and are only spending around $20 on laundry per month.

Random expenses: Because there always are some. Let’s just tack on another $100.

That leaves you $25 to put in your bank account, if that. This is a paycheck to paycheck situation, and you will probably need to get another source of income to feel secure. But you can still do it!

It’s incredible as to how many people are still obsessed with using identity politics despite it being so painfully obvious that it’s just a cruel game of one-upmanship, like so:

A: “I feel really crappy right now and I wish someone was here supporting me.”
B: “Yeah, A, but you haven’t been through abuse. I’m an abuse survivor. I could have your problems, but also have to deal with trauma. Your problems are therefore nothing compared to mine.”
C: “Yeah, B, but you’re not mentally ill. I’m a mentally ill man who’s an abuse survivor. I could have your problems, but also have to deal with ableism. Your problems are therefore nothing compared to mine.”
D: “Yeah, C, but you’re a man. I’m a mentally ill woman who’s an abuse survivor. I could have your problems, but also have to deal with misogyny. Your problems are therefore nothing compared to mine.”
E: “Yeah, D, but you’re cis. I’m a mentally ill trans woman who’s an abuse survivor. I could have your problems, but also have to deal with transphobia. Your problems therefore mean nothing compared to mine.”
F: “Yeah, E, but you’re white. I’m a black mentally ill trans woman who’s an abuse survivor. I could have your problems, but also have to deal with anti-black racism. Your problems therefore mean nothing compared to mine.”

So suddenly, A asking for a little support after having a bad day leaves him open to be mocked and abused. There’s no compassion for him. No care for him. No space for any kind of basic human kindness.

Even in the middle of the pack, D gets to be mocked and abused because her problems still aren’t “enough” for others to give any compassion or sympathy.

And because identity politics is like this, the extra labels in bold end up becoming what’s important. It’s not even the so-called “intersectionality” that ends up being important, despite the claims to the contrary. It’s the final, additional label that gets all the focus.

  • Having a bad day isn’t as important as surviving abuse.
  • Surviving abuse isn’t as important as ableism.
  • Ableism isn’t as important as misogyny.
  • Misogyny isn’t as important as transphobia.
  • Transphobia isn’t as important as racism.

What’s even more shocking is that whilst A in this scenario is currently feeling really down and needs support right that second, in every other scenario thanks to identity politics, they’re not focused on what’s currently happening. They dismiss A because of labels that could mean that terrible things have happened in the past, or that bigotry might happen again in the future. It’s torn between “Once I had it worse than you currently have it, so that means that your issues are worthless” and “Something could potentially happen to me in the future that I think will be worse than you currently have it, so that means that your issues are worthless.” 

And that’s horrific.

But that’s not all. It doesn’t even always come from those with different labels to A. Sometimes it comes from people who are just like A, but because B, C, D, E and F even exist, then those people use them to dismiss A anyway.

In any other scenario, this kind of thinking would clearly show how nasty, cruel and disgusting people like that are.

1: “I’m upset because my snake might be sick.”
2: “Yeah, 1, but my snake had a disease, so you being upset means nothing.”
3: “Yeah, 2, but my snake died, so you being upset means nothing.”
4: “Yeah, 3, but I had a hamster that died, so you being upset means nothing.”
5: “Yeah, 4, but I had a dog that died, so you being upset means nothing.”

Or like this:

Z: “I’m upset because my parent is sick.”
Y: “Yeah, Z, but my parent is in the hospital, so you being upset means nothing.”
X: “Yeah, Y, but my parent died, so you being upset means nothing.”
W: “Yeah, X, but I never knew my parent, so you being upset means nothing.”

Anyone is allowed to feel pain without feeling guilty.

Someone always has it better than you. And someone else always has it worse.

There isn’t a limit on how much compassion you can give. How much care you can offer. How much sympathy you can feel.

Caring about one issue doesn’t mean that you have to stop caring about another.

Everybody goes through their own issues. They appear because of personal circumstances, background, their families, their friends, their schools, their jobs, their environment. Nightmares. Worry. Stress. 

Sneering that someone else’s personal problems are “worse” when you see that someone is having a rough time doesn’t make you “woke,” it makes you a monster.

Dean’s Plaid

Summary: You and Dean do NOT get along. Until the night that you do.

Warning: smut, anger sex

Word Count: 3200

A/N: Hope y’all enjoy some Dean smut! XOXO

There are two things in the world you really hate: plaid and Dean Winchester.

There are plenty of things that you don’t like, that irritate and annoy you, that you’d rather not deal with. But those are the only two things you actively hate. A store with a window display of plaid clothing is enough to get your blood boiling these days. And Dean? Well, you make sure you never think of Dean. That just tailspins your world into a mess of violent anger for days before it wears off.

So the fact that you are currently wearing one of Dean Winchester’s plaid shirts, listening to him hum along with the radio as he drives you to his motel?

Yeah. You’re gonna need something to kill.

Or you could just kill Dean.

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Communicating With Deities


How do I communicate with my deity?

How do I know if a deity is trying to reach me?

How can I tell if my deity accepted my offering?

How can I receive messages from my deity?

The topic of communicating with deities is the question I get asked the most so I figured it was time to give it its own post. Especially because this question doesn’t have an easy answer.  It’s not as simple as learning to give an offering or how to devote yourself to a deity. There’s no step by step, made for everyone and every deity, guide to communicating. Its ultimately something you have to figure out yourself, though I can offer some help in ways to go about figuring it out. But first I want to clear some things up about communication with deities. I feel there are a lot of misconceptions that surround it and I also need to explain WHY it’s a topic I can’t give you an easy answer to. So let’s get to that!

  1. Faith- So I’ll admit that the obsession that a lot of people have with communicating with their deities confuses me. When I started I didn’t really think much of the hows of interacting with Aphrodite because I, just like with any other religion, assumed that I had to have faith that Aphrodite was listening. I feel like a lot of people are missing that, like being a Hellenic Polytheist means you have constant, consistent, and direct messages from the gods, but that’s not the case. Faith is still an element and honestly it remains an element even when you have been devoted for years. You’re not always going to get confirmations on things you do or ask, actually most of the time you don’t. You just have to have faith they are there and listening
  2. Tumblr - This point is directly related to the first point. I believe that a lot of the misconceptions of communicating with deities and even the obsession with it has a lot to do with our community here on tumblr. I’m not here to accuse anyone or point any blame. I’m not even saying that people are lying or exaggerating. I just think because of everyone sharing their wonderful experiences it’s creating an image of communicating being a natural part of a devotee’s everyday life with their deity. I mean maybe it is for some, but not all. Honestly, a lot of what you are looking at on tumblr are snapshots of worship. Maybe that devotee received an AMAZING sign or message from their deity but perhaps that was the first one in a few months. The truth is, just like with most aspects of our lives, we like to share the fantastic on social media, so don’t take everything you read as the “normal” or the “standard” of devotion. The truth is there really isn’t one and definitely not one for communicating with deities.
  3. Skills - It’s important to keep in mind that communicating with deities can be seen as a skill. And just like with any skill there are those who are “naturally gifted” and others who have to practice practice practice in order to see any results. This is also a reason why you shouldn’t look to others’ experiences as the way it works for everyone. They could be one of those naturally gifted people who are just born tuned into the god frequency or they could also have been practicing and doing a lot of work to get the point where it’s easier to receive messages. So those of you starting out shouldn’t automatically think you will begin getting signs and messages right away, it most likely will be something you have to work towards.
  4. Deities Communicate Differently - A big reason it’s nearly impossible to say how or if a deity is communicating with you is because they do it in different ways. The way Aphrodite and me communicate may not be the same way she communicates with another devotee. A lot of it depends on the devotee. We each have a way of communicating that we will be more receptive to, whether you know it or not. Your deity might know that and choose to use that form, even if you haven’t exactly figured that out yet (fun, right? lol). A deity also may choose a way to communicate depending on the message they are trying to send you. They could also pick a way simply because they find it amusing and/or ironic (i’m looking at you, Hermes). It’s really hard for someone on the outside to tell you for sure how your deity is going to interact with you specifically. I can’t speak for the gods and I can’t speak on your personal relationship with them. Again, it’s something you have to journey through and find answers to yourself.

Now that the bad news is over with, how about I give you some good news? As I said above, I can give you some advice/tips on ways you can figure out how to communicate with your deity yourself. Remember this is a process, a journey, it’s not a faucet. Doing one of these things isn’t going to automatically start the flowing of messages. Just keep that in mind! Now onto the list!

  • Divination - Probably the most popular form of communication with deities is using some form of divination. There’s A LOT to choose from so do your research and see what calls out to you and give it a try! Some examples are tarot, oracle, runes, pendulum, scrying, bibliomancy, shufflemancy, just to name a few.
  • Meditation - I strongly recommend everyone try meditation because there’s a ton of benefits to it and one of those benefits is connecting with your deities. Not only can you receive messages and signs while mediating, the act itself opens you up to be more receptive in your everyday life!
  • Astral Travel - This is another popular method used to communicate with deities. Many people talk about not only receiving messages from their deities, but also full on interaction with them. Make sure you do your research before attempting it! It also may help to practice meditation first.
  • Dreams - Okay so this is one of the easier ones on the list to do. Basically start recording your dreams and see if you notice anything either popping out at you or that’s repeating. Sometimes your deity may just simple show up like “hey, what’s going on? You dreamin?” but other times they aren’t that obvious (why would they make it easy on us?). Recording your dreams is a great way to notice patterns because sometimes it can take multiple dreams to get a message. This applies to the universe as well. Like it took me a good chunk of my life to realize that when the universe wants me to pay attention it throws an abundance of something in my dream, where I’ll be like “shit thats a lot of elephants!” and then another dream years later “What is with all these fucking spiders!?”. Keeping a dream journal makes it easier to notice things like that. You can also ask your deity to appear in your dreams if you so choose (of course whether they do or not is up to them). Also if you’re into it you can use herbs and stones to better receive messages in your dreams and to remember them when you wake up.
  • Journaling - Anyone who has been a follower of me for awhile can probably tell you that my answer for most things is “Keep a Journal” and they are probably eyerolling me right now, lol! But I really believe in the benefits of journaling because they are abundant! I won’t go into all of them because we are talking about communicating with deities and damn it I WILL stay on topic! Just like recording your dreams, recording your waking life can help you spot patterns and possible signs that you might miss otherwise. If you’re like me and interact a lot with your deity through emotions and feelings, journaling is truly wonderful! You can start making connections between actions and your emotions that could help you better understand your deity. I also recommend doing this even if you choose to do one of the other ideas listed above. Recording your progress and your emotions is great for looking back on and seeing how far you come especially in those moments when you feel like you haven’t done much. So yeah, everyone keep a journal!
  • Open Yourself - So those of you who are witches don’t really need much explanation on this and honestly you might have already started on this one, but for the sake of those who might not know let me explain. There are different ways you can better open yourself up so receiving messages can be easier. Using certain stones, burning certain herbs/incense, using oils, casting spells, doing rituals, etc. There’s a lot you can do to help open yourself up to the universe! And these aid a lot in the techniques above!
  • Talk To Others - I know what you’re thinking “Wait, didn’t you say that looking at what someone else does is part of the problem?” Yes, i did, but it can also be helpful as long as you find the balance! Seeing how other devotees of your deity interact with them can at least give you ideas and a direction to go in. The key is not to compare and to not see their devotion as the “one true way”. Think of it more as a brainstorming session!

I just want to add that this post is my own personal opinion and personal reasons why I feel I can’t answer questions of this topic. I hope this post was helpful to those of you who took the time to read it!

Meme credit goes to my hilarious, wonderful and talented wifey @nerdywitchmomma 

How beauty routines got me extra money

I’ve tried to post this twice so I’m making a very short version of this post. Sorry I won’t have much detail but my phone is acting weird.


When I started Tumblr I collected so many hoe tips, masterpost, beauty tips, and etiquette cheat sheets that I filled 3 note books. Some of them are still in boxes so until I find them to make a masterpost I’m going to share how they made me money


Skin routines

Making my skin close to flawless took me a long time but when it was perfect it got me more looks and cost me less makeup.

Presenting myself with clean, soft, and smooth skin put my at a different level in sugaring that equaled more money. Whenever I looked like a million bucks men thought I was worth a million bucks.

You wanna walk in the bedroom like:

Originally posted by anangstyblackgirl

I received extra money for facials, skin products (especially LUSH), and various spa treatments. After spa treatments I would go out and show off my glowing skin and attract some POTS.

Fit body

Not all SBs have to be a size 3 to get lots of money but the do typically have a curvy figure wether slim or plus size. So look up some homes workouts and quick fit routines and get in the habit of doing them at certain time. I still to this day do my squats before I take a shower and my booty looks fabulous.

Having an amazing body to show gets me countless shopping trip, lots of gym clothes and with semi-fit SDs you might get a personal trainer.

Originally posted by fitnessua

Hair care

As a natural black woman it was hard to get men to see my hair as high maintenance but I did it and here’s how…

  • I would style my hair differently for every date
  • I would have it smelling nice
  • I would straighten it for special occasions
  • And most importantly I would invest in high quality wigs.

I love to switch it up

Originally posted by multiculturalmodels

I’ve even had a SD pay for my weekly Cowash appointments because he hated that u spent Sundays doing my hair instead of having brunch with him.

I received lots of money for hair appointments, salon products, and even fancy hair combs. In addition to head hair I’ve also got waxing for the few spots I do grow hair on my body.

Perfect Smile

For me the smile is very important and just a smile alone can get mores yess than nos from your SD. I’ve had men come up to me just to talk about my smile and that’s a good thing when you freestyle.

For me I focus a lot on making my lips smooth, moisturized, and attention catching. I invest a lot in lipsticks, lip gloss and scrubs to get my lips looking good because they are my assets. I’ve also regularly seen my dentist and kept up with my mouth hygiene.

I actually get my smile looks from men lol

Originally posted by tuftofidols

I’ve received extra money for electric toothbrushes, lipsticks, and I had one man purchase me some invisaligns.

Hands and feet

There are a lot guys who like a nice looking foot and delicate hands so make sure to baby them as much as possible. Keep you nails done, feet smooth, and socks fuzzy (they help make your feet soft overnight).

Even vanilla men will drop some cash to pay for my nails and pedicure. I’ve never paid for my nails to get done because I have a whole nail kit but I never turn down an offer to go to the salon. When your SD pays make sure you try out all the fancy places you know until you find the best one. Good nail technicians and hair stylist are hard to find so make sure you use this opportunity to find the best.

Originally posted by glamhoeour

Make up

Doing your makeup right is very imporant and should be different for every occasion. When I first started out I went full on glam for every date and wondered why I was being taken to certain places for dates. But then a lovely SD made this amazing make up post and taught me how classy ladies do their makeup for different occasions.

Thereafter I found myself going on dates in different environments. I went horseback riding, to Galas, to 5 star restaurant and felt more comfortable there. Even though being a black sugar isn’t always comfortable fitting the part of a high class person makes it a little better.

When I mention to my SDs that I’m running low I would get sephora money, expensive make up, and exclusively saled makeup as gifts.

P.S. If you haven’t had Fenty and your brown you should invest asap

Originally posted by s-t-4-r-g-i-r-l

Last but not least eyelashes and eyebrow

Let me just say real quick, don’t get creative with eyebrows and keep it simple. The more natural your eyebrows look the better. I don’t really get more money because of this because they go with make up but I do get money to maintain them.

Originally posted by classyorgasm

The extra money I get is usually for eyebrow threading and tinting, and eyelash extensions.

I so hope this was helpful and am willing to talk about any of this in more details but my next post will be focused on fashion.

Until next time,

T

Imagine Dean meeting your parents while you spend the weekend in your old home and realizing he wants to have a family with you.

“De-Dean” a whimper left your lips even if you meant to say it in a completely different way “Dean please, we- we can’t. Not again.” a small whine left your lips when his lips actually detached from the skin of your neck even if that was the exact thing you were asking him.

“Sweetheart, are you really telling me you don’t want it?” he said with a smirk, looking up at you through his eyelashes before he kissed back your collarbone and you let a small groan, mixing with a moan when his lips started trailing down.

“Don’t ask questions you already know the answer to.” you whined softly, still arching your back upwards to press yourself closer to him “But D, you- you know we-” you gasped softly when you felt him bite you, his face inching closer to your chest as his hands worked one on the bra and the other on your panties, which by the way were the only things you were wearing. Not for long, though.

“We can’t do it now.” you said with a moan and he pulled away, looking down at you “My parents are gonna hear us.” you bit your lip.

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