because i am having doctor feels

I have a nice smile, I’m smart, I’m extremely kind, I can do pretty much everything (sometimes even better than able-bodied people), I have the potential to become a doctor and I was offered to get into Olympics but of course none of that matters because I have a hand that doesn’t work quite well… none of who I am matters. I don’t matter, I don’t mean shit. Why? Because I’m not worth money to capitalism and its already multi millionaire industries. I’m not worth shit. I’m worth nothing.

How am I supposed to feel good about myself when all I see is this dead disgusted look in their eyes?

Asexuals and Aromantics are interesting enough people to carry stories. I am so sick and tired of tv writers and writers in general and people in society thinking that just because someone doesn’t experience sexual or romantic feelings, they don’t lead interesting lives. Our lives are just as interesting and fulfilling without crushes and dates and making out or having sex or whatever. We can still tell a story. We aren’t broken or boring or whatever other lameass excuses you have for excluding asexual characters from your stories. We are people that deserve representation. And I don’t mean coming out arcs or self discovery or shit (which I wouldn’t mind), but you can have a character in a story. Make them ace or aro or both and thats it. It isn’t hard. Its not like they don’t care about people. Aces and Aros have friends. Friends they love and care about deeply. They are just normal people. They aren’t a soulless robot. They aren’t the villain because they don’t have sex or a romantic partner. I’m so fucking tired of this shit.

Am I the only one who thinks Theseus Scamander probably looks like Jude law as John Watson?

is it that he looks like newt a little

no not really but there is a vague these-white-guys-could-be-brothers feeling to it

do they have similar movie posters

no but the movie poster from jude’s movie looks like when newt is chasing credence 

(or visa versa)

is it because sherlock looks a little bit like a skinny jacob

yes you jacob

is it that i like the idea of him acting a little bit like john Watson who is also a war veteran , hero, and doctor.

and being an over protective brother figure who deals with Newt with exasperated amusement because this baby has his head in the clouds

 

is it because of a Tiniest Trace of Hope (8) by @esamastation that gave me the perfect older brother and uncle combo that i didn’t know i needed

i dont really know

(also cool note about the gifs)

burn out

There has been a lot of talk lately at my program about burnout prevention. Nobody, of course, addressing the root problem which is that we work too much.

I just had my first weekend off in a month, and it’ll be another month before my next one. I’m starting my first ICU rotation tomorrow, knowing that I will likely face more heavy shit – death and dying, grim family meetings – in three weeks than I have so far in almost six months of doctoring.

I do not feel up to this right now. I am entirely lacking in both energy and curiosity. Doing it anyway, of course, because what is the alternative?

I would cry if it would help.

the only thing i am good at
is crying
and feeling things the rest of
the whole world
has a choice not to.

i spent last night in the
waiting room of a hopsital
asking the doctors
if my heart
if my heart
stained their white coats.

i believe in magic
and nonsensical things
which don’t have any logic
which doesn’t make sense
which must mean i am
good at recognizing mental illness
because ultimately i am only attracted
to the madness in people
who have less self control
than i ever will.

listen, doc, i know i shouldn’t
but i admire those people
who are so unabashed in their misery
it drives them crazy
because as much as i try to
i can never let go
of anything,
much less of
myself.

FanFic Appreciation Week

I feel like I am getting on this kind of late but I have excuses. But here are some great authors or some amazing fics that I have enjoyed and gone back for a few fandoms. I have a lot of stories from a lot of fandoms most Gravity Falls because I am currently obsessed with it right now so here we go:

Keep reading

So I love my primary care doctor. She apparently has a note in my file to try to put me as her last patient of the day because she knows I have issues and a complicated doesn’t-fit-in-boxes chronic illness, and so my appointments take a while. She gave me a maintenance scrip of Prednisone for while I am waiting for an appointment with rheumatology. With that, it doesn’t feel like she’s trying to make my health problems someone else’s problem (see also: maintenance scrip so I am not in agony until then).

She is going to do more research on Crohn’s arthritis and other non-typical presentations of Crohn’s and joint problems because she doesn’t run into that, um, ever.

She didn’t give me grief about getting a handicap parking tag or act like it was So Much Paperwork (like my previous doctor did. But I really think that they thought I was faking.)

So. Yay.

How to make your pelvic exam a little less scary

Anonymous said: So I haven’t gotten a pelvic exam or any exams of my lady junk. I’m 23 and my doctor always brings it up every time I go in for anything. I am absolutely terrified because I was sexually abused as a child and I don’t even feel comfortable letting my partner look or touch down there. I feel like I’d need my therapist there to stand by my head and hold my hand just to feel a tiny bit better. Do you have any advice?

Ok first find a doctor you are comfortable with. This is huge. 

Your doctor needs to be patient and understanding of your situation and be willing to help you get through the exam as uneventfully as possible.

Once you’ve found a good doctor, make an appointment specifically to talk about your abuse and your anxiety about having a pelvic exam. Tell them about what was done to you as a child if you feel comfortable so they can understand your fears. This is unfortunately an all-too-common situation, so I doubt your doctor will be shocked by anything you say. Remember that the focus here is not to degrade you or make you relive any trauma. The focus is to help you be more comfortable with your body and to help you take good care of yourself.

At that visit, ask them to walk you through the process of a pelvic exam verbally if you think it will relax you. Find out who will be in the room during the exam and if there is a nurse you are more comfortable with, request that they be the one who assists. Know that the nurse or assistant often stands by your head or side and doesn’t have to view your “lady junk,” but depending on room setup it may be unavoidable. If you think asking questions about the exam will make you more nervous, skip it. Ask your doctor if they feel comfortable prescribing you some sort of anxiety medication for one-time use on the day of your exam to help you get through it easier. We will do that occasionally (like when people are terrified to fly), so I don’t think it’s an unreasonable request.

Schedule your exam just a few days after this initial appointment. Don’t give yourself much time to agonize over it and keep changing your mind. On the day of your appointment, bring whoever you want with you for support. It’s 100% okay to have someone come with you and stand by your head and hold your hand. Wear clothes that you feel comfortable and confident in. 

Bring headphones and listen to music during the exam if that makes you more comfortable. And don’t worry about any special cleaning or grooming. That’s not necessary.

After the exam, 

Additionally, check out these old posts on how to make your pelvic exam not hurt and this one on current US guidelines for the frequency of pap smears and pelvic exams so you will be better equipped to advocate for yourself at your doctor’s office.

And finally, 

Remember that rules of consent apply to pap smears too. 

If you decide halfway through that you’re uncomfortable and you want to stop, speak up. Your doctor should stop. Nobody can do a procedure or invasive exam on you without your consent.

anonymous asked:

Hi! So in the past few months I've been feeling more and more tired and like I am out of energy. In September I became a vegetarian and my parents keep saying it is because of that. I'm not sure. Do you have any tips? 🌿

There are so many reasons why you could be feeling tired!

1. First of all, I would definitely go to your doctor and get a blood test done to check that you aren’t deficient in anything. Deficiencies, especially iron, can cause a range of symptoms including tiredness.

2. Make sure you are eating enough! Plant foods are a lot lower in calories than animal products, which means you have to eat a bigger volume of food. Not getting enough calories will definitely result in tiredness and weakness, so I would try increasing the amount of starches (rice/potatoes/oats etc) and fruit, as well as increasing portions in general if you think this might be the case, and see if that makes a difference. Including more leafy greens can also really help with energy levels as they are PACKED with so many nutrients!

3. Also make sure you are eating regularly and not going for long periods of time without food!

4. Make sure that you’re drinking enough water throughout the day! Dehydration will cause you to feel sluggish and tired, our bodies are about 60% water after all!

5. Try to get enough sleep and also make sure you are getting a good nights sleep. This might mean going to bed earlier and getting into a good sleep routine.

6. Exercise is also important for good health and if you just sit around all day it can actually cause you to be MORE tired than if you include some physical activity into your day. It doesn’t have to be anything strenuous, just a walk, some stretching, yoga, anything you enjoy, will do! I love getting out in nature to ‘recharge’ and I always feel so much better afterwards!

7. Stress can also cause tiredness, so if you think you might be stressed from work, school, anything else (life can be stressful!!) I would find ways to reduce that. Try to do something you really enjoy doing every single day, that also relaxes you! This might be drawing, playing or listening to music, exercise, meditation, calling or catching up with a friend, cooking etc. also try to take unnecessary pressure off your shoulders and don’t expect yourself to always be perfect. Try to put yourself and your health/happiness first!

Of course there can be a number of other reasons as to why you’re tired, but I hope you find this helpful and are feeling better and full of life again soon💛 xxx

anonymous asked:

Can you explain why you don't like Moffat? Because i mostly liked all his episodes and i feel like i am missing some shit Moffat has been doing.

I could do that, but => Aja Romano does a much better job of it here <= (With receipts!), it goes way beyond ‘omg get over the fact your fave char isn’t on the show anymore.’, especially for me, bc I’ve been watching Doctor Who since I was five. That’s 24 years. If I was going to skip out over a character bowing out, I would have peaced out on this show decades ago.

My problem is with the writer, with the writing, with what he’s done to the Doctor, with his representation of women, his representation of wlws, poc, etc. – and that’s before his fucked up comments. People can disagree with me as they like, but to me he’s made the show unrecognizeable. 

It’s a really deep hole in my life, not being able to look forward to it, or to be able to watch a large chunk of seasons bc of him. I miss when the show was campy, but about something. At least that’s how I feel. Again, you enjoy what you like, it’s the time you spend. If you get something good out of it, then by all means <3

“Your Heart Next to Mine” - Digital Oil Painting

I have a headcanon that Tentoo has an additional reason to love kissing Rose, because he can feel her heart beating against his chest, and for a moment, he can remember having two hearts, and both of them beat for her. She is his second heart.

If you enjoy my art, please consider subscribing to my Patreon! I am saving to buy a wheelchair.

Am I the only one or...

Does anyone else get that feeling when they are reading a really good book or a fan fiction and realise that they have nearly finished and then wish the fan fiction or book was longer because it is that damn good?

That being said if I was inseminated without my knowledge or consent by a doctor I would sue literally everyone on the whole entire planet and I get that Jane is a character who is a people-pleaser and doesn’t want to make trouble for anyone who is even a little bit nice to her but like, listen, on an intimate level I understand feeling that way, I am the person who would not contest her 400 dollar cell phone bill until her stepmother took charge because I didn’t want to come off as strident to a call centre worker even though paying that bill would have meant being short on over half my rent. HOWEVER, inseminating someone without their knowledge or consent is, like………. assault. I’m not saying that you have to report an assault of any kind - I have never reported any of my assaults - I am just saying that they did a really good job of handling the subject of abortion on this show and I would like to see them also address the fact that what happened to Jane is HELL OF illegal and actually like a major violation of her trust and agency and not just a wacky misunderstanding. 

Let  me clarify something

The reason why everyone is so hyped up by the fact that Yoongi talked about his mental issues has deeper meaning that you would think first.

1) It’s rare to see or hear idols talking about something special like disorder, mental illness, anorexia etc. But he did it and told the world that : Hey here I am I have the same problem just like you because even that I’m an idol I’m not different

2) And looking this from the other side…..well I don’t know if you have ever experienced depression, anxiety or any other mental problem but one thing is true. If you experience it you can’t overcome it. No matter how hard you try or how many doctors you visit. You only learn how to live with it but unfortunately and sadly the feeling will never disappear. And because of, that talking about it is such a huge thing. Because first, you acknowledge the fact that you suffer from something that you are aware that something is not normal with you. Then you start to worry again that you should tell anyone or not? ( and the devil cycle starts again) But when you finally face with it yourself and took one more step to say out louder your problem…well you have to be really brave because even though that you acknowledged it a little voice in your head will question your act ( before you do it…when you do it …and after you do it) So from this perspective saying out your problem is a real BIG DEAL

You’re like the stars in the night sky

I can’t help myself from falling in love by the way you shine from above.

You’re like the moon in the night sky

You have a personality that has different phases at different places, and it was so damn fine.

You’re the clouds in the night  sky

When i look at you and when i talk to you, i feel calm, safe and at ease

You’re the stars, the moon, and the clouds because you never leave my side even if im at my darkest times. Remember  that i will always, always be here when you needed me, a helping hand, a bestfriend, a counselor, a doctor or whatever you want as long as you’re mine and forever i am yours.

- M.K 11:07pm 02/09/2017

anonymous asked:

i am so sure i'm autistic. my parents won't listen to me and they're always dismissing my claims (i.e. "if you were REALLY autistic you wouldn't think you were") and it's really hurting me. so many people don't take self diagnosis seriously but it's all i have until i move out because they won't let me see any doctors about it 😔

You could try talking to them about about it without actually mentioning autism. Focus on any difficulties you have and anything you feel you need (what kind of help you need with things, accommodations that would be helpful at school if you’re still in education). If they realise that there is a need to look into those things, that might give you an opportunity to discuss the possibility of an assessment with a doctor.

If they’re too aware of the fact you have told them that you are sure you’re autistic for you to be able to avoid mentioning it, then you could acknowledge it but still focus on the needs rather than the label. For example, explaining, “Okay, I know you don’t think I’m autistic, but I am having problems and I feel like there must be some kind of explanation for them/I do need some kind of support.” 

You could try asking them very clearly to listen to you properly, to discuss it without being dismissive, and to take the time to consider and look into what you’re saying. Them dismissing you isn’t stopping you from believing it to be true, so you could point that out and ask them to at least take you to speak to someone about the possibility that you might require an assessment, or if you live somewhere where an assessment would be free, you could ask them to support you in seeking an assessment (even if they’re sure you won’t be diagnosed).

You could try explaining why their dismissive comments aren’t true (for example, pointing out that lots of people who are diagnosed suspected that they might be autistic beforehand). 

You could also try talking to someone else who might be taken more seriously by your parents. For example, if you’re in education you could talk to a teacher or someone whose role is to support students with additional needs.

I have been so unhappy with myself over the past two months and honestly, I don’t know what to do anymore. I am isolating myself more from my closest friends, my self-esteem has lowered, I can’t focus when people speak to me or on any tasks with school, and I have had multiple panic attacks/mental breakdowns over the last 3 weeks. I am trying to get help; I have been going to the doctors to get medication but every one I have tried, my body has reacted negatively to it. I’m so frustrated, the process is tiring and I absolutely hate going to the doctors or to anyone when it comes to anxiety/depression. I feel weak and I feel embarrassed when I get like this. I am a very strong person and I am very good at pushing through and doing whatever it takes to get better; but right now, I am lost and I am hurting and I don’t know what to do with myself because I am so tired of fighting this battle. i just want to feel better and be better.