Ah, I like thinking about Murdoc getting older...
-Murdoc finally reckons with the fact that he can’t read the newspaper unless he’s holding it two feet away from his face. So he sucks it up, goes to the eye doctor, and finally comes back home with a pair of reading glasses. When the band sees him with them on for the first time Russel says Murdoc looks just like Grandpa Hobbs, 2D can’t even look at him without laughing, and Noodle takes a picture of him and makes it her phone background.
-Murdoc buys men’s hair dye from the pharmacy and has Noodle touch up his roots every once in a while because he’s starting to grey around his temples and there is no way in hell he’s doing band promos with grey hair.
-Russel is a little shit and starts slipping pamphlets for retirement homes into Murdoc’s mail every morning. Murdoc flips his shit when he sees them and always rips them up and throws the pieces out the window, and Russel can’t even bother trying to keep a straight face about it.
-Murdoc has a tiny crisis at a bar one night when he tries to flirt with a woman and gets completely written off because he’s way too old for her. Murdoc’s just standing there in shock, and 2D pats him on the shoulder and takes him out of the bar and tells him that maybe he should just consider being a sugar daddy or something. He’s old enough for it.
-Murdoc is constantly looking up advice and gimmicks online to keep his penis in tip top shape because, no, he is not going to be one of those old farts that can’t get it up in their 60s, and he is sure as hell not going to reduce himself to Viagra. He’s a fucking sex God, dammit. He doesn’t need those pills.
-Murdoc comes into Noodle’s room drunk one night, complaining that he’s gonna be one of those old men with beer bellies and man boobs, so the next morning Noodle tries to ease him into her healthy diet, because she’s the only one in the house that eats properly. Murdoc keeps complaining about it because he doesn’t like all the green shit she’s putting on his plate, but she posts pictures of beer guts and moobs all over the house to motivate him into staying with it.
-Russel realizes how loud Murdoc’s headphones are when he wears them in the studio, and he has the rest of the house convinced that Murdoc’s actually going deaf. 2D starts screaming everything he has to say to Murdoc so he can hear him, and Murdoc doesn’t know why the fuck he keeps doing that, I can hear you just fine you fucking idiot, stop your bleedin’ screaming!