because he really is just a kid

elvhenyoung  asked:

Time for some fluff cuz I think we all really need it, again. (Also morning, dear~) Again a mix US, UF and SF Skelebros after a really hard and tiring day at their work are met with their S/O who had drawn them a bubble bath with relaxating scented oils and candles (with their favorite scents), and additional pampering for whole evening.

Underswap

Sans

Blue is just so happy!!!! He pulls you into a tight hug and kisses your lips before excitedly stripping in front of you to get in the bath like a little kid. He invites you to join him because hey, you put this together, you deserve a reward to! You join him in the bath and the two of you splash around playfully and just enjoy each other’s company. Blue forges you a bubble beard and snaps a picture will you cover his entire head with bubbles and the two of you just continue to laugh. 

After your bath, the two of you help each other dry off with small little kisses and mutters of gratitude. Before either of you put on your clothes, Blue attacks you with tickles, leaving you writhing on your bed with happiness and laughter, as you breathlessly beg him to stop before you roll over on top of him and get your revenge.  

Papyrus

If there’s one thing Stretch knows how to do, it’s relaxing. He’s pretty good at finding ways to wind down by himself, but it makes it 10x more special if you help him and do it with him. Bubble baths aren’t really his thing, but if he gets to go in there naked with you, he’ll gladly do it. 

Once you two are in the bath together, and despite his height over you, you lay back behind him and massage his tense bones, letting release all that tension and melt into your arms. Stretch falls asleep during your massage. Careful to not let him drown. 

Underfell

Sans

Like Stretch, bubble baths aren’t really his scene, but you put in all this work, for him? Why? He doesn’t understand why you would do such a thing for him. Red doesn’t deserve this, his “hard work” usually just consist of taking really sneaky naps, there’s no reason for you to put together such a lovely and relaxing evening for him. But you did and Red has no choice but to go along with it. 

When he gets in the bath, he encourages you to get in with you, and Red touches you everywhere, non sexually. He just like feeling your nice skin under his fingertips. In this state, he is very vulnerable, but he trusts you enough to allow himself to be. 

Papyrus

Ahhh now you’re speaking his language. Romantic candles? Warm drawn bubble baths? Deep massages? This is the perfect relaxation setup for Fell. But what makes it more perfect is you naked in the bath with him. With you, he can shed that touch persona and let loose, covering you in kisses while you massage his bones. Fell isn’t one for touch, but right now, it feels so good so he lets you do it. 

Afterwards, it’s passionate love making. Since he’s so relaxed and isn’t up for anything intense, Fell goes for soft domming instead, focusing on making you drown and both pleasure and pain as a thank you for making him so happy. 

Swapfell

Sans

Black can’t sit still enough in the bath for a massage. Heck he can’t keep still at all to relax, he’s too hyperactive. He loves the setup though, and once you get in the bath with him, he’s all play. Black will have splash water on you and you two end up having a splashing war, and as competitive as he is, Black wins, but in the process, there’s barely any water in the tub anymore and you both made a big mess. But Black doesn’t care. Once he wins, he pulls you into a deep kiss and doesn’t let you go. 

Don’t worry, he’ll clean up the mess. 

Papyrus

Oh, Rus just swoons. You both get in the romantic bath together and Rus is the one massaging you. He doesn’t care about himself, as long as you feel good, so does he. And oh stars, his fingers are divine. When he’s finished, you two just sit in the tub, kissing and touching each other until you’re both breathless and dizzy. You stay until the water turns cold and the candles die down, because neither of you wants to move. He wants to stay like this forever, with you in his arms, the smell of you rubbing on him, his fingers stroking down your bare back. 

Eventually, you two fall asleep in the tub. But don’t worry, in the morning, Rus wakes up to you shivering and he feels bad so he carries your naked self into bed and wraps you in a heap of blankets. When you wake up, Rus already has a warm drink and pancakes ready for you. 

Some personal Lazytown headcanons
  • Lazytown is a micronation that’s been around for generations, that the mayor inherited after his parents died. 
  • Lazytown is located somewhere in the US or Canada 
  • The mayor has some southwest asian heritage (India, Pakistan), but is a mix of a lot of things (it’s why he looks so racially ambiguous) 
  • Trixie on the other hand, has a southeast asian family background
  • Stingy’s dad does actually love him, but his business job just takes him around the world so he’s never home often. But he REALLY values the times that he is 
  • Sportacus is only a superhero title and not his actual name. Since he’s a full-time superhero, he’s not allowed to tell anyone in town his real name until he retires (because who the fuck names their kid “Sportacus”) 
  • When Sportacus came to Lazytown, he was actually a freshly appointed hero who was actually looking for his first town to take care of (Lazytown got really lucky) 
  • Robbie’s family has traces of magic blood in it, but Robbie was the only person in his family growing up who could actually do magic 
  • Robbie grew up in a farming family, which is why he has a cow billboard and blankie. He also likes being lazy and hates sportscandy because he spent his whole childhood working hard to grow sportscandy instead of getting to play 
  • Stingy and Pixel aren’t real names either and are just nicknames 
  • Stingy’s parents made a comment on him having stingy behavior once. And only being a little kid, he took that as a good thing and claimed the nickname as his.
  • Ziggy is short for “Siegfried” 
  • Robbie did not make his lair and it actually existed for a long time (no one remembers what it was for). He literally just asked the mayor “Hey, can I live here” and the mayor was like “sure” 
  • Robbie affords everything because he sells the things he makes and actually has his own brand (the RR). He’s also been commissioned to build and fix stuff for town by the Mayor in exchange for getting to live there 
  • Lazytown used to have a lot more people than it does now (like a couple hundred) and most of the houses we see are actually empty 
  • Since Lazytown seems to be in a rural area, we never see the parents because they all work out of Lazytown and come home late 
  • Pixel’s house? The fucking genius made it himself. The whole fucking house is his “bedroom”. 
  • Sportacus, being just a baby hero who is new, is not widely recognized the way that nine or the other heroes were
  • Sportacus doesn’t take off his hat or show his ears because elves consider their ears as private parts of their body that are rude to show 
  • Steph’s summer stay in Lazytown turned into a forever stay because her parents dumped her with Milford with no intentions of getting her back (Steph is 100% alright with this though) 
What the hell?

I posted a pic of Alan Turing because it’s his birthday today and it gets marked by tumblr as NSFW?! What the hell is up with that @staff? Really? Because he’s a gay icon? He is way more than just a gay icon, though that is awesome too. But he was also a genius who came up with algorithms that paved the way to modern computers, lap tops, tablets and cell phones, not to mention all the other things he was interested in. But to my mind the most important thing about Alan Turing, he is a true hero who saved thousands of lives during WW2.

As for my post, there is NOTHING NSFW ABOUT IT. It is a tribute to a great, and good, man. I find tumblr automatically tagging posts like mine as NSFW just because it is about an openly gay man offensive, especially ON HIS BIRTHDAY. You should be celebrating Alan Turing today, not labeling posts about him as NSFW.

Yeah Jake is very immature, especially for an adult, but a lot of the time he intentionally acts immature for Finn. Jake wants to distract him and make him laugh because Finn is still a kid who’s dealing with really heavy stuff, Jake is the big brother who has to keep his cool while everything is falling apart. If Jake didn’t act that way, Finn would fall apart too. He’s a kid dealing with so much and Jake is just trying to lighten the load and distract Finn from how cruel things are. 

Jake hides how he feels behind this immature facade too, he gave into the ice elemental’s depression the same way Finn gave into the fire elemental’s rage without Jake. The reason he gave into it wasn’t because he was cold, it was because on the inside he was depressed and repressing it. 

Not to mention he’s given Finn incredibly wise advice time and time again throughout the series, and despite his immature personality he does know when to get serious, like when he believed his daughter was kidnapped (Even though Jake Jr ended up being just fine). And he’s actively harmed himself multiple times for Finn, and unlike Finn, who is still a kid, Jake knows when to quit and swallow his pride, like with the Jake suit, he wasn’t about to throw his little bro in an active volcano (But Finn jumped in anyway).

He does go too far at times, like with his granddaughter, but those are chalked up to his desire to be cool and young, because he fears growing old and being old.

TL;DR: Yeah Jake is immature on the surface but there’s a lot more to him

DJ Khaled’s “I Love You So Much” has me so fucked up. Just because, like he really really genuinely loves Asahd. To have somebody just l o v e you like that? Like just love you in the purest form possible? I don’t have anybody in my life where I’m like “oh wow if anything every happened to me I know (so and so) would be so fucked up.” Like, when I have a kid I’m gonna love them so hard so that he/she will never have to know what it feels like to question his/her worth, or question if anybody actually cares about him/her. Like I want him/her to off the bat know that I love him/her and that I would be fucked up if anything ever happened to him/her and that he/she doesn’t need anybody else besides me, feel me?

“In Another Life” | NaruSaku

In which Sakura’s character becomes self aware.

Pairing: Naruto Uzumaki x Sakura Haruno

A/N: I am extremely new to fanfiction (fanfiction based on existing works, that is) so I don’t really know what I’m doing here and I don’t know the fanfic terminologies so I don’t know what to tell you. It’s a bit angst-y, I guess?

Excuse the typos. I rarely proof read.

Also, if you ship ss or nh along with, don’t read this k thx

Words: 2,490

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anonymous asked:

27 and 57. together or not :P

I’’m assuming the pairing is malec, for obvious reasons. 

Before we start, this might not go the way you intended, nonny. That is because I just can’t see malec being jealous as in, feeling their relationship is threatened by other people. I’m not comfortable writing that or romanticizing such a harmful sentiment, so I put my own spin on this one. 

Send me a numbered prompt!


“Hey have you seen my- Oh.” + “Wait a second… are you jealous?”

Magnus was late for a meeting. Half an hour late, and it wasn’t even the fashionable late he wanted to be. It was just plain late and disrespectful to the other American High Warlocks at their biannual meeting. Really, as if he wasn’t already getting enough shit from having married a shadowhunter and adopted kids, now Magnus would get an earful from those smug old assholes simply because he couldn’t find his favorite jacket.

Desperate times called for desperate measures. There were many perks to having Alec Lightwood as his husband and only some of them had to do with their sex life. The one advantage Magnus was most thankful for at the moment, however, was the fact that Alec was a neat freak.

He would know where the jacket was for sure.

So Magnus marched up to their children’s bedroom, where Alec was putting the boys to bed. He opened the cracked door. “Hey, have you seen my- Oh,” Magnus stopped midsentence.

Alec was indeed there with the boys, sitting on the foot of Max’s bed. Only, their little one was fighting tears and whimpering, his little hands covering his face.

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The NDRV3 Cast's Phones (1)

Shuichi Saihara
- Has a simple phone, which he uses mainly for communication
- Occasionaly takes a picture or writes a note
- His wallpaper is a reading aesthetic with a motivational quote written over it

Rantaro Amami
- A super modern and expensive phone
- It has like a million accessiories
- But he doesn’t really use it that much??
- He mostly uses the maps and texting or calling (especially his sisters), but sometimes he also uses the camera or notes
- His wallpaper is a selfie of him with his youngest sister

Kiibo
- Doesn’t need one
- But might get a simple one just to be more like a normal kid
- Won’t use it much.
- His wallpaper is a picture of a dog, because he once saw a kid who had their dog as a wallpaper so he thought it’s normal
- It’s not even his dog, it’s the Shiba doge meme because Ouma

Kaito Momota
- A fairly normal phone, neither too simple nor too expensive
- Occasionally uses it to play games
- Mostly for communication
- Also for taking selfies with his bros
- Might put them up on Facebook
- His wallpaper is a space aesthetic

Kokichi Ouma
- A pretty normal phone
- But the cover and the keychain are pretty weird
- He mostly uses it for communication and searching for memes while he’s bored
- Occasionally takes pictures, but like 75% are blackmail material
- The rest are selfies of his doing the peace sign with someone who fell for his prank in the background
- His wallpaper is his organisation’s logo

Korekiyo Shinguuji
- He has a somewhat modern phone but barely ever uses it
- No one ever texts him anyway
- His wallpaper is a picture of his sister at a Japanese shrine

Gonta Gokuhara
- ???
- He knows how to make a call!
- Texting is a bit more of a problem, but he can do it if he tries really hard
- Other than that he has no idea how to use it
- His wallpaper is a bug aesthetic

Ryouma Hoshi
- He has a normal phone, something similar to Momota
- But he usually doesn’t even bring it with him
- Who would talk to him anyway??
- Is honestly considering selling it, since he doesn’t think he has a use for it, but he can’t bring himself to, since he still hopes he might use it one day, even though he won’t admit it to himself
- His wallpaper is his girlfriend

Kaede Akamatsu
- A very cute phone with a lot of music themed accessories
- Filled with classical music and notes for her songs
- Other than that she mostly has it for communication
- Just like Kaito, she only takes selfies with friends and occasionally will take a picture of something pretty she sees
- Her wallpaper is a piano aesthetic

Maki Harukawa
- …
- F u c k
- Honestly she is so bad at using it
- She can fuck up something as simple as making a call
- But really if someone tries to call her she will try to cancel the call and accidentally accept it instead
- Then she gets angry and blames it on the phone being too difficult to use
- She doesn’t even know how to set her wallpaper so it’s whatever was there from the start or something Ouma put in while she wasn’t looking

Kirumi Tojo
- A fairly simple phone used 99% for communication
- She also occasionally uses the reminders or the camera
- Her wallpaper is a picture of a very clean, old-fashioned bedroom

Tenko Chabashira
- Didn’t really use it much until meeting Himiko
- Now she constantly texts and calls Himiko
- All her pictures in her camera album are either of just Himiko or a selfie of her and Himiko
- Her wallpaper is a selfie of her with Himiko

Himiko Yumeno
- She has a pretty simple phone, because she only needs it to call mommy
- Who needs a phone when you have magic anyway?
- Her wallpaper is a picture of her and her mom

Angie Yonaga
- What’s a phone??

Miu Iruma
- She made it herself
- It has like a million other functions besides being a phone
- Nobody can ever find her browser history on this thing
- Literally has a special application for porn
- Her wallpaper is literally her own selfie

Tsumugi Shirogane
- A very modern phone
- The cover has her favourite character on it
- It has so many character keychains hanging from it, it’s almost disgusting
- Her wallpaper is also fandom trash
- Her photo album is filled with fandom screenshots

anonymous asked:

tbh the fact the relationship even happened was bad for maia. even if he was "out of control" or whatever, the memory of the awful things he said/did to her would still be very real. it doesn't matter if Jordan had an excuse, the abuse is still abuse even if there was an "I'm sorry." the fact she reentered a relationship w him was so unhealthy for her mentally. it's one of the biggest problems I have w the books bc cc is teaching kids to go back to ppl who hurt them if they merely apologize.

yes exactly and she didn’t even really want to get back together with him and forgive she literally did it because she felt guilty like he manipulated her once again and wouldn’t take no for an answer and she even was planning on breaking up with him but he died before she got the chance like she was consistently uncomfortable with him when he came back because of what he did and it just makes me sick that it was just brushed aside and like the wolf thing isn’t even an excuse because maia never abused anyone when she changed, like it heightens your emotions so he was obviously already an angry person like i feel like he would have ended up abusing her either way

nct hogwarts!au [hansol]

• slytherin
• tbh everyone was shook the sorting hat was shook he is the quietest boy
• yuta was like ,,,??? Because he thought he was gonna be a ravenclaw for sure
• half blooded and used to be lowkey ashamed
• because slytherins are mostly pureblood snobs and hansols really quiet and never stood up for himself
• kinda kept to himself and just ignored everyone
• one day yuta steps in
• throws some hexes
• no one ever came for him again

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anonymous asked:

Rev-set head canons: when one of them is drunk and the others have to take care of him? Or when they go to a party who is usually the mom-friend?

When Alex is drunk:
- Probably the most difficult to deal with
- Swears he isn’t drunk no matter how drunk he gets
- He’ll get really sleepy but won’t go to bed because??? He is stupid
- The other three spend the night trying to get him to sit still since he won’t sleep
- They usually end up passing out before him

When John is drunk:
- You thought this kid was loud before
- He will just talk and talk and talk
- He can go a long time super hyped but then he just crashes
- The other three tag team it because as much as they love him, none of them can listen to the same incoherent rant five thousand times in one night
- They usually end up with bruises the next morning because he likes to gesture, and the drunker he is, the more wild the gestures

When Gilbert is drunk:
- He comes off as very put together; it takes a minute to notice he’s drunk
- He does get to be very emotional after a certain point
- He is v e r y affectionate
- He is the easiest to take care of because he wants to be taken care of
- He has to be cuddled always, but especially before bed
- All four of them end up crammed in one bed because he just cannot get enough affection

When Hercules is drunk:
- He is also loud but not ranty
- He just looses his sense of volume and yells everything
- He may be yelly but it’s pretty easy for the boys to get him quite
- If he gets too loud, just a little kiss will bring him back down
- He is a good kisser no matter how drunk he gets, so no one gets tired of the pretty constant kissing, but they still take turns

Hercules is 100% the mom friend if the group is going out. The most mom friend you know? Times that by ten.

Sweeney Todd glorifies murder:

1. The Ballad of Sweeney Todd is awesome. It sends the message that if you want a really awesome ballad and a lot of attention you should kill people. What theater kid doesn’t want a really awesome ballad and a lot of attention? 

2. Sweeney Todd is portrayed as a sympathetic character. You’re supposed to sympathize with him just because he was shipped off to bloody Australia or whatever. 

3. This is extra Problematic because not every ex-con who’s been shipped off to bloody Australia turns into a murderer once they get back to London.

4. His victims are, for the most part, regular people who as far as we know don’t deserve to die, but the text never condemns him for killing them. They’re just nameless characters. We sympathize with their killer more than the victims.

5. Even at the end, he’s never punished for murdering people, just for carelessly murdering his wife. Basically saying “Be careful that you don’t murder one of the two people you don’t want to kill but who cares about anyone else?”

6. He’s not even really punished since he chooses to die. He feels remorse for killing his wife, but he never faces consequences for everyone else he killed.

To be honest, I can’t really take Mr. Enter’s haters seriously…like, all I can see from them is “boo hoo, he hates my favorite show”. Deal with it; he gives out valid reasons as to why he doesn’t like them (and I totally agree with most of them). It’s not “wah I hate it because I’m not in the target audience” or whatever. I totally agree with like, almost everything he talks about in his reviews and always had (especially the whole “you can’t half-ass something just because ‘it’s for kids’” he points out in the MLP G3.5 reviews)

Like obviously we don’t agree on everything (I like Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi but I’m aware it’s a flawed show. He didn’t like it and made an Animated Atrocities review. I’m not going to get bent out of shape about it. I don’t like the rest of KaBlam!. He does. That’s okay). But almost every time I watch his videos, I always think “amen to that!”. Plus, I gotta thank him for drawing more traffic to my LwL YT channel!

(Yes- I know about the elephant in the room regarding the whole SpongeBob writers thing. He apologized for it and did say he was wrong for it. And that’s better than just not acknowledging there was a fuck up at all)

the story behind mr. sugarnose

‘Cause, see, Sabo wears a top hat and a coat that flares like a cape, so I really just want some kid to wander up to Sabo and be like, “mister, are you a magician?” So he ends up learning a few sleight of hand things because of it, and someone already taught him to cheat at cards (you’ll never convince me he doesn’t cheat Allen!style at poker) and anyway sometimes he entertains kids for a bit on the streets while killing time

OR NO WAIT SO EVEN MUCH BETTER somehow he ends up undercover as the magician entertainment at a child’s birthday oh oh please

v. important child. High risk target. Too much overly paranoid security. Infiltration is the only way, Sabo, and it’s this or the clown, do you want the clown wig, Sabo, Sabo, wait, stop running away. It’s not til next week, that’s plenty of time to learn magic, I’m sure

“You realize, if you’re gonna make me do this, this makes you my Lovely Assistant. Bunny suit and fishnets and heels for you.“ "Hmm. Good point. Maybe I’ll be the magician, then?” “Wait–” “Nothing you wouldn’t wear yourself, I mean it!” *devious face* “that’s right, I forgot, you think shame is a sin. Right, never mind, I’m gonna take care of my own outfit, thanks. Shouldn’t you be learning a French Drop or something?”

“One week to learn a routine that’ll impress a crowd of little kids. How hard could it be?” HAHA SO HARD SABO U HAVE NO IDEA. kids are actively the very worst audience

But the hilarious thing is, you’d go learn a handful of simple tricks, like appearing candy or something, right? WRONG. A kid’s show should have about one dumb “mistake” warm up trick, one or two quick fun tricks that involve the audience, and then one big visually impressive trick, and that’s it. Five MAX. A forty minute routine would be pushing it anyway, and that’s for a crowd ages ten to twelve.

Sabo would do it so wrong. To be fair, Koala would be a much better magician, actually. …actually, of that pair, I really would put them as partners, with Koala as the head and voice and Sabo taking pratfalls and sitting in the audience and generally being a goof as Koala plays the straight man.

…damn, now I wanna design them a routine? Sabo would be the plant, the idiot sitting in the middle of the twelve year olds pretending to be one of them and calling out dumb questions and waving his hand wildly to be chosen and managing to get through the crowd by pretending to trip on all the kids, pulling candy out of noses and ears.

I BET HE FAKE SNEEZES CANDY ALL OVER THEM. And he keeps “messing up” Koala’s tricks. The Comedy Magic Duo of the Revolutionary Army!

chaotic--cosmos  asked:

Please talk about the mummy returns

pristinepastel said: Hey, i know you like the first mummy, but what about the mummy returns?

I HAVE RETURNED…after like a day. 

but what the people want, the people get!

RIGHT SO THE MUMMY RETURNS!

aka the only sequel that is 1000% just as good as the first one. like holy shit. 

ten years later and we meet our heroes again. rick and evie are happily married, going on adventures, and evie’s dream of becoming a respected scholar has come true and they’ve made a tiny human! 

the only unrealistic part being that they only had one kid, i mean they are still all over each other ten years later and you’re telling me they only had ONE kid.

okay. sure jan. 

but boy o’ boy is that one kid awesome! 

alex o’connell. this kid is literally:

  • 50% evie super-klutz-genius. 
  • 50% rick screams-at-things-that-are-illogical-to-scream-at. 
  • 50% uncle jonathan’s sheer dumb luck and wit. 
  • 10% i’m really bad at math. 

you get the point. HE’S GREAT. also the actor passed on harry potter because, JUST LIKE ME, the mummy 1999 was his favorite movie and he just HAD to be in the sequel. alex is just such a smart-ass little shit. that much like his mother, accidentally brings about the apocalypse by opening something he shouldn’t have:

Originally posted by rafikecoyote

ARDETH BAY TIME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. he has a much bigger role in this one. GOD BLESS. (because he was supposed to die in the first one, but test audiences loved him as much as we do, so they kept his fine ass around) he still looks prettier than everyone and is still so done with white people once again. 

*after almost being killed on he bus* “this was my first bus ride.”
*after realizing they’re gonna make him fly again* “why can’t you people ever keep your feet on the ground?”

he’s just such an awesome A+ friend goals, because while he probably needs to go be with other medjai to prepare for battle against anubis’ army (yikes), he stays with the fam to rescue alex. it wasn’t even much of a thought for him really, rick and evie just batted their eyelashes and he was like: *sighs* “these white people are always messing my shit up, but they are my white people.”

Originally posted by lestatscherie

jonathan: still beautifully the same as ever. witty, clever, and would do anything for his family. 

“be quiet alex! if there’s going to be any hysterics, they’ll come from me!”

“if you see anyone come running out screaming, it’s just me.”

when he boasts about being a good shot and ardeth is internally like “i’m gonna die.” THEN HE SAVES ARDETH. hell yeah.

Originally posted by aurhireactions

rick: he’s still screaming at things. BUT IN DAD MODE. he’s the ultimate dad.

“you, lighten up. you, big trouble. you, get in the car.”
*sweetly* “honey, what are you doing, these guys don’t use doors.”
“knowing my brother-in-law, he probably deserves whatever you’re about to do to him, but this is my house and i have certain rules about snakes and dismemberment.”

Originally posted by lmhotep

evie: still a super-klutz nerd, but with C O N F I D E N C E. little baby librarian is now a honey badger of ASK ME IF I GIVE A FUCK! and also a re-incarnated princess

“no harm ever came from opening a chest.”

rick: “i swear that kid gets more and more like you every day.”
evelyn: “you mean more attractive, sweet and devilishly charming?”

Originally posted by a-ripley

we meet izzy, another one of rick’s ex boyfriends, who is a much more reliable mode of transportation than previously mentioned murder buses. 

imhotep: still emo. still wants to make out with his gf.

anck su namun/meela: hella good villain. she bomb af and 100% wants to take over the world. amazing. she actually has like a really cool role this time too!!! like so much screen time. 

Originally posted by marimoody

the rock…i mean the scorpion king, he’s another emo villain with goofy cgi rendering and like 4 million terrible made-for-TV spin off movies that you are lying if you haven’t watched at least one of them and felt that utter disappointment. but who cares the rock is pretty. and this was his first acting role and the reason we have him where he is today. 

thank you mummy returns for giving the world actor rock johnson #blessed

Originally posted by charmander-ann

THE ROMANCE AGAIN:

normal action movie sequel romance: same guy. different girl. repeat of first movie’s romance. hehehehhehehehhEHEHEHEHHEHH. 

not here bitch. 

rick and evie’s love has only grown stronger. they still bicker like old ladies at bingo night. the still look at each other like they hung the moon. they’re still disgusting jonathan because they CANNOT KEEP THEIR HANDS TO THEMSELVES. one kid my ass. they still support each other and protect each other like crazy. they love each other so much and it’s so healthy and pure and there is some good in this world mr. frodo.

Originally posted by yocalio

the bottom line here is. what’s the point of watching the mummy 1999 if you aren’t going to watch the mummy returns immediately after?

JUST DO IT.

Originally posted by mummymovies

shibolet3  asked:

Wait what con artist from 2014

I’d like to title this story “Swing And A Miss

Okay, so my high school had this program where seniors could leave school like a month and a half early and opt out of exams if they took on internships around the neighborhood, but not everyone wanted to/was eligible to do it. Back in like 2013, they had like 15 bored seniors stuck in the school, so the administration brought in this Professional Life Coach, left him in alone in a room with them for two hours to talk to them about like, self-esteem or some shit. All the kids were pulled out of their classes for this*, and later told the administration that they loved him, they really enjoyed the talk.

So, about a year later, we have a new principal. He’s supposed to set up an assembly for all the 11th and 12th graders, but he doesn’t know what to do. One of his coworkers mentions that there was a life coach that was a huge hit with the kids that didn’t do community study last year, so maybe he’d also be great for a larger audience. The principal basically thinks “okay, what the hell” and calls up and hires Jason C. Jean to come talk to the kids.

Now, it’s like, 10:30, maybe 11:00 in the morning, and two entire grades are getting shepherded to the main gymnasium, and no one wants to God damn be there. We ain’t got time for self esteem talks. We want to sleep. And this guy, watching us all drag our feet in and collapse into the bleachers was just like…offensively peppy. There’s a couple faculty members sitting behind him, the woman who suggested he be hired for this, the vice principals for the grades- but the principal himself kept getting calls so he was in and out the whole time.

Now, Mr. Jean was like…the chill “Just call me by my first name dude” history professor at college times 30. He was trying so fucking hard. I’m referring to him as ‘Mr. Jean’ in this story just to be disrespectful. So anyway, we all get in there, and he tells us right off the bat “You guys are totally allowed to be on your phones and laptops during this! I get it! It’s no problem, like really, I insist!” so while the faculty members are exchanging smiles that read ‘how do we kill that while respecting him’, all the kids are immediately pulling out their electronics and he’s starts his speech.

Now, again, I really wanna reiterate that he told us we could be on our phones- because when the news articles started coming out about this, I remember all these angry, annoying comments from old people like “Why the hell were the students on their phones in the first place! So disrespectful! These damn millennials and their social media!” like, they were completely ignoring the entire story and just focusing in on kids using the internet, and it Really Super Pissed Me Off, so. Again, we had permission for this (which also ended up being Mr. Jean’s fatal mistake).

So, he starts off this speech fairly normally, like ‘hi, I’m Jason, I’m a professional life coach and I wanna teach you kids about how to be The Best You!’ and like people were tuning him out and listening to varying degrees. Some kids (like myself) were kinda dozing off, and everyone was on twitter or facebook.

His approach to a self esteem speech seemed to be ‘let me tell you my entire life story for hours’ and like, at first I was like “I’m not really hearing this, I’m half dreaming right now” but the more I started making myself pay attention the more…bizarre and rambling his story got.

So like, for instance, he told us he drank a lot in high school. Like, a lot. But he didn’t use that as a ‘don’t drink or party too hard’ lesson, instead he was like “I was fourteen so I always called my parents to pick me up, and they weren’t mad because they knew it meant I could trust them. So remember, always tell your parents when you’re drinking!” and then it kinda got to a point where it sounded like he was encouraging partying and drinking and the like to the group of underage kids.

And then, he told us how he used to play baseball all the time when he was a kid, and at 16 reached a crossroads in his life where the Phillies wanted to draft him or he could go play football for Penn State. And he said he went with Penn State but later lost the scholarship for some reason and we’re like…really.

There was absolutely nothing coherent about anything he was saying- nothing that tied anything together, made a point, seemed like it had anything to do with an assembly on self esteem. He told us at one point he was making upwards of 7 million a year. He told us one time before college he was homeless. He told us he used to own a construction company and built his own branch of nightclubs himself, that he and his friend then ran. He told us he fought a shark and came out with no scars. He told us that he had less money now, because after surviving a work related accident- direct quote- “I fell almost 30 feet and I broke in half” - he decided to leave that industry and spend more time with his family.

So, yeah, I was pretty positive this was bullshit, but there were clearly kids in the room that were falling for it. But then he said something like…he and his friend got bored one day and started jarring up their own pasta sauce, and made a deal with wegmans or some store like that to start selling it, and now he has a pasta sauce empire. Like he spent 15 fucking minutes on this. The way he kept saying ‘pasta sauce’ was so annoying I was about to claw my ears out. But anyway, two girls in my grade wanted to find out what brand he was talking about, so they googled his name.

And then quietly gasped.

And then furiously started typing into their phones.

And remember- everyone, even though they were paying attention- was on twitter and facebook. All the sudden I see heads flying up and wide eyes and people whispering to each other. Mr. Jean doesn’t seem to notice the change and keeps rambling on, but I know something happened so I google him too and-

Okay so basically he’s 1) been arrested, 2) filed for bankruptcy like three times and 3) has been hailed as a ‘Swinger Guru’ by playboy.

EVERYONES SILENTLY FLIPPING OUT.

So by now, this is a fucking game- he still doesn’t notice anything wrong amongst the kids, so we’re all silently texting each other to fill each other in. Pulling up receipts. But still playing the part of politely intrigued audience members. The school faculty have no fucking idea what’s going on, until one of the students texts her mom, who happens to be the woman that convinced the principal to hire this guy. We see her check her phone, go wide-eyed, and she runs out of the fucking room presumably to either find the principal or hide in terror.

So Mr. Jean had been talking to random people intermittently throughout this speech, but we reach the ‘questions’ part of it. Everyone seems to silently agree that instead of just asking him anything outright, we should just see how good of a liar he was. So they’d be asking him stuff like ‘how much money did you make with ____ company’ and he’d give a ridiculously high number as people were sending each other reports of him filing for bankruptcy during that time. Or they asked him about his construction business which he said was great, and while he was talking about how great it was we were all reading his arrest report, from when a woman hired him to build her house, and he took her money and then like…just didn’t build anything. Wild. Someone asked him about his family and he’s extolling Christian virtues while we’re all on the website for his annual Swing Fest. People would ask him how he got certain jobs and he was making promises to hook kids up in interviews and shit. Everyone was loosing their God damn minds online and just barely holding it together in person. This man was so beyond full of shit- like, he was a God awful life coach but his dedication to lying was inspirational.

We eventually get to leave and everyone is yelling and cracking up and freaking out, all running to our classes to tell the teachers and the underclassmen everything, and the teachers are freaking out, alternating between horrified confusion and laughing hysterically. Before the school day even ended, someone had called a bunch of news stations. The principal was freaking out and denying he had anything to do with it, before calling some students to his office to see what exactly the kids had searched up on the guy…Because apparently teenagers can perform better background checks than school officials. It was all anyone could talk about for weeks.

A couple months after this, for my theater class’ showcase, I wrote and directed a skit called ‘Mason B. Mean’. It was a huge hit. The principal was in the audience. I’ve never seen a grown man look so dead inside. I made sure I was out of the room before he came up to congratulate the cast and everything. The next day, my theater teacher told me his only comment about the skit was a quiet, long-suffering “Why.” 😂😂

Annnnnnnnd that’s the time a Swinger Entrepreneur rambled on about pasta sauce and money in front of teenagers who knew how to use google for almost two hours.  

http://www.philly.com/philly/news/breaking/Montco_principal_apologizes_for_having_swinger_entrepreneur_speak_to_kids.html

I want to tell a quick story about how important representation in television is, and how Sense8 is really making a tangible difference. You can repost if you like, I thought your followers might enjoy it.

My dad is a wealthy, white, conservative male who voted for Trump. He’s not a hateful person…in fact he’s one of the kindest people you’ll meet and he can talk to a random stranger for hours. But he’s extremely fiscally conservative and tends to have a narrow world view. 

He and I argue a lot. He calls me a naive liberal who has no idea how the real world works. I call him a decrepit old man who wouldn’t know innovation if it kicked him in the teeth. It’s our way of keeping each other on our toes. 

But we love to watch TV together. Game of Thrones, House of Cards, and Vikings are a few of our favorites. I always held off on showing him Sense8…I honestly didn’t think he’d like it. But one day he asked me “What should we watch next?” and I though…why not?

He absolutely loved it. Yeah he thought the sex scenes were a little gratuitous, but he couldn’t stop watching. He even started talking about it to all his brothers and friends during our BBQ. I was so pumped he enjoyed it. 

But it was one scene in particular that really changed things for him: Nomi’s speech during her sister’s rehearsal dinner in episode 2x8. 

You see, my dad thought Nomi’s relationship with her Mom was unrealistic. He said “Parents love their kids unconditionally. No real mother would ever say those types of things. I mean…she’s not abusive. She’s not a drug addict or an alcoholic. And clearly no money problems at home. A real mom wouldn’t hate their kids just because.”

I was floored and didn’t know what to say at first. He had called me sheltered and naive so many times…and then he says something like that. I realize that it’s because he loves me so much (and would still love me so much even if I were trans) that he found a character like Nomi’s mom not just unrelatable, but completely unrealistic. 

But eventually I say this. 

“Dad…about half of homeless youth are LGBT. Believe it or not, this is one of the most realistic parts of the show.”

To which he replies: “Oh. Really? I…didn’t know that.”

And then a few minutes later Nomi’s says her speech and I look over and my dad is tearing up, just a little. 

“You doing alright over there?”

“Yeah…yeah I just….I’m fine. But I think I get it a little more now.”

So that’s my story. Even old white guy who voted for Trump is heartbroken about Sense8’s cancellation. That says a lot about how big a mistake Netflix is making. 


Submitted by @fourforyouglencoco

im not saying nina taught sonny to read, but that is what she tells people

compose-myself  asked:

I know you get a lot of crap about the Wesley character, but I've recently introduced my 9yo niece to TNG, and he's one of her favorite characters. We just started S2 and she keeps bubbling about how excited she is to see him go to the Academy and get his uniform. She's disappointed if he's not in an episode. Her enthusiasm reminds me how much I adored him as a little girl. People use the term "kid-appeal character" as a pejorative, but you were *good* at it. Just wanted to let you know 😊

I really love this. Thank you for sharing it with me. 

Please tell your niece that I talked with Wesley, and he wanted me to tell her: “You can be anything you want, do anything you want, and don’t ever let someone tell you what you can’t do in your life. Don’t give up when things get hard, because everything worth doing is hard! If I can drive the Enterprise, so can you.”