get to know the boys:
tom brady - the goat. he’d rather eat avocado ice cream than strawberries. he yells but it’s because he’s really passionate. deep down he love everyone a lot.
jimmy garoppolo - he looks more like aladdin than aladdin. here comes the smolder. super cool. tries his best and always succeeds.
julian edelman - he’s fast. he thinks of himself as a squirrel but he’s probably more of an energizer bunny. he’ll fight anyone for his teammates. he’ll punch the sun than take a selfie after just to prove he’s hotter.
danny amendola - has so much heart. tried to keep a cool head and mostly succeeds. actual male model. he makes helmet hair look styled to perfection.
rob gronkowski - the funnest guy you’ll every see. loves to dance, great at twerking. cugs beers in minion hats. he’ll drag opponents where he wants to go, they don’t stop him until he decides it.
duron harmon - CLUTCH. he is the definition of a ball hawk. he’s on you like leaves on a tree. your shadow is always a step behind him.
dion lewis - the sweetest smile. wear ankle braces cause odds are he’s juking you out. speed demon. full of heart. got a little break last season but ready to come off the block sprinting.
malcolm butler - the super bowl savior. he did That™. not a one hit wonder! unless he’s trying to knock the ball away from his competition. deserves everything and then some. went to disney world and brought all the magic home with him.
jamie collins - confirmed superman. he is so fast, he’ll get there before you do even if you have an hour head start to run 5 feet. great at reading people. my man is a physic.
logan ryan - a prince. his family is goals. been compared to bambi because he’s just that light on his feet.
stephen gostkowski - probably made in a lab. 100% guarantee almost every single time. he’s not called mr. reliable for nothing. he’ll kick your ass without even touching it.
legarrette blount - he will hurdle you so watch your head. he is a bulldozer, he forces his way through. always really smiley and takes great pictures. snapchat is always hype.
matthew slater - was probably the popular jock in high school. everyone loves him. if you touch him, good luck. the real og leader. everyone listens to him. got married recently.
devin mccourty - moves so fast you’ll see two of him and that’s not just because he’s a twin. totally the team’s guardian angel. just trust me on this.
rob ninkovich - beard goals. looks like a grizzly bear but has a heart of gold. good luck getting anything past him. lumberjack looking boyyy.
patrick chung - tattoo goals. that’s all you need to know besides the fact that he’s always on his A game.
ryan allen - he is secretly the reason we always succeed. his punts go into the next state. he has a standard and never lets it drop. a real life angel on earth.
james white - his nickname is white lightning for a reason. he’ll juke you out of your shoes, run back around, hand them to you, and still make it into the end zone before you pull up your sock.
martellus bennett - an artist on the field and off it. his wife and daughter are gorgeous. he’s basically a little kid at heart. so sweet, his smile makes anyone melt.
jacoby brissett - tore apart the texans. hasn’t played much but has simply proved in one game that he truly is a force to be reckoned with.
that’s not even half of the absolutely amazing athletes we have on the patriots. this organization has honestly been blessed to have such ballers.