anyways I’ve been having #thoughts all day about how much i want a scene where robert legitimately comes out to victoria, like straight up tells his little sister that he’s bisexual, because robert has had so few opportunities to come out on his own terms (the only one was him telling aaron he was bi in the car, really) and so letting him have a positive coming out experience with someone he loves, where he comes out on his own terms would be 10/10 a+
my mom came back home and told me “hey rocky today i saw a girl who was reading a book by your favourite author, it was called the gambler, i didnt know he hasnt only written huge brick like books” asbhfjkafahsbf
AU Where Geoff Slowly But Surely Becomes Dad Of The Crew
Like It Starts One Day When He Gets Michael A New Gun Or Car Or Something And Without Thinking Michael’s Like “Oh Sweet Thanks Dad” And Geoff’s Just “What” So Michael Just “What” And Immediately Leaves To Escape The Situation.
And At First He Doesn’t Think Much Of It, Just A Flub Like They All Do, Nothing Worth Noting, Until Gavin Calls Him Dad One Day And He Just Stops Like “What The Fuck Did You Just Call Me?” “Dad!” “I’m Not Your Father Dumbass” “Aw But Michael Got To Call You Dad That’s Not Fair! You Can’t Have Favourites!” And Michael Runs In From The Other Room Like “You Little PRICK” And Chases Gavin Off For Pointing It Out And Geoff’s Just Left Standing There Confused.
The Next Time Gavin Tries To Get Away With Calling Him Dad It’s Over Earpieces During A Heist And Geoff Quietly Hisses “Fucking Stop Calling Me That” And After A Moment Of Gavin Giggling Ray Comes On Like “So Can I Call You Papa Instead Or…?” And Geoff Nearly Blows Their Cover Loudly Insisting That He Cannot.
A While After Jeremy Joins He And Geoff Are Driving To Get Masks For A Heist And Laughing About Something, As They Approach The Mask Store Geoff’s Like “Alright, Everybody Calm Down” And Jeremy’s Just Immediately “Sorry Dad”. And At First Geoff’s Just Dumbfounded For A Second But Then He’s Like “Fucking- Did Gavin Tell You To Call Me That?” And Jeremy’s Just “What? No, Wait Gavin Calls You Dad?” And Geoff’s Like “No He-” And Ray Pipes Up From The Backseat “I’ve Been Using Pop Pop Is That Better?” And Geoff’s Like “NoI’m Not Your Fucking Father!!”.
The Lads Are Caught Messing Around On His Yacht Again (Probably With Rocket Launchers, Thanks Ryan) And He Turns To Jack Like “You Said You Were Watching Them, Can’t You Keep Them Under Control For Five Minutes??” And Jack Just Crosses Her Arms Like “They’re Your Kids Too Y’know!” And Geoff’s Just “I- THEY’RE NOT MY KIDS”. When They Finally Get The Lads Reeled In Again Geoff’s So Frustrated He Just Points Them To The Penthouse And Deadpans “Go To Your Rooms.”.
Afterwards He Flops Down On The Couch With A Bottle Of Whisky To Unwind And Notices Ryan Out Of The Corner Of His Eye, Sitting On The Other End Of The Couch And Grinning At Him.
Shitty knows way too much about housing codes and property law. He initially learned property law to save the Haus from being condemned, but then he realized that reading archaic, flowery law opinions while high was the most fucking hilarious thing ever. Everyone at his law school is confused by and a little afraid of Mr. B. Knight, because while no one else wants to touch all those old, mostly nonsensical British common law cases, Shitty eats that shit up