because all men i know are weird

Being Remus’ twin sister, but Sirius' girlfriend would include...

-when he found out that Sirius liked you, he was grossed out

-and very surprised

-and overall, got really protective

- “Okay, well, you can feel that way, but never, ever, will you be able to date her”

-spoiler alert: you guys dated

-after your first kiss, you just said “shit” which was followed by a cocky Sirius saying “what, is wasn’t that bad, was it?

-because how are you gonna get away with this?

-when you both told Remus, he was just like “Nope,”

-he kept going on and on about how Sirius was an effing womanizer and that you are just setting yourself up to get hurt

-and you were just like “Okay, cool, but I think we all know that if he did hurt me I would just kick him in the balls and dump him so boom, problem solved”

-this is followed by Sirius staring at you, smiling, because he thought that was so hot

-and Remus just storms out

-later, when Remus realizes there is nothing he can really do, he kind of just sits next to you by the lake one day and takes an easier approach

- “I just- you’re my sister and he is one of my best friends. You can understand how that’s weird for me. Just be careful, alright? Men can be real wankers,”

-and for the rest of your relationship with Sirius, it was smooth sailing

-Sure, Remus got weirded out or protective sometimes

-but you were happy, and that’s all he ever really wanted for you anyways

bernthalls  asked:

Okay, i don't know if you read the leaked spoilers of s7 but jon and dany will have a sex scene. So...You think there's still hope for jonsa in the future? as a jon x sansa shipper im in deep shit and i need your opinion

I did read the leaks and I still believe in Jonsa happening. I don’t know if I’m a fool to believe this, but I won’t lose hope until the very end and not just because it’s my otp, but because D&D gave me the reasons why I still should believe in them ending up together, eventually.

The boatbang is likely to happen and I know it’s disheartening, especially because it sounds very OOC for Jon. But IF it’s going to happen, I hold my faith in the contextualization of the scene. I’m aware fucking is just fucking, but Jon could be doing it for various, different reasons and we still don’t know yet. The leaks gave us little info, there are still missing pieces to give more sense to the plot and maybe one of these missing pieces is the reason why d/j are possibly going to bang. 

When I watched ep 1 & 2, I didn’t think immediately about how right the leaks were, but how many things were left out, and above all, how much the context changes the dynamics of one scene. For instance, the leakers depicted Jon as a complete jerk towards Sansa, as he “put her in her place” during the council and I was very scared about what I was going to watch, instead I ended up watching Jon determined and stubborn on his own decisions (as a King should do after a discussion), but totally not “putting Sansa in her place”. They discuss and talk after the council, a scene we knew nothing about, and they were basically two cupcakes confronting each other. Maybe the only rude thing was “How should I be smarter? by listening to you?” which sounded like a dick line, but as I interpreted it, I don’t think Jon meant any offense to her, but more like “you know better than me how to prepare the North against the White Walkers?”, that was the point that was poorly delivered by d&d in that scene. Jon lives in a constant fear no one believes him and maybe even Sansa thinks he’s a fool, but we know Sansa blindly believes him without any proof, unlike a certain Targaryen Queen. That scene was everything! and the reason why I believe the leaks left out so much and have no fucking idea the context of the scenes.

I will never stop speaking about the CONTEXT. It’s so important and it’s the only thing that keeps me hopeful about what will really be this quick boatbang.

As many other Jonsa shippers pointed out, they may fuck, but the Targbowl is coming in S8. D@ny in 7 seasons has come to a place of self-righteousness and has developed a sense of entitlement regarding the Iron Throne, that she won’t like one bit the minute Jon’s true parentage will be revealed to her and her right to the Throne will be undermined by him. Ep. 3, to me, foreshadowed there will be a final clash between them, not coming from Jon obviously, but D@ny herself.  


Re: Jon and Sansa, D&D have been constantly given us Cat/Ned parallels throughout the first and second episode of S7. The parallels are HEAVY, blatant and so evident that no one could deny it. The writers are not even trying to be subtle anymore, they just shamelessly show us how Sansa is becoming like her mother, and how much Jon is becoming exactly like Ned. Jon and Sansa have been turning into a new, future version of Cat and Ned, the difference is that they’re still work in progress; they are still building the relationship Cat and Ned had and I strongly believe they will reach that point.

As Cat said to Robb: “Love didn’t just happen to us. We built it slowly, stone by stone, over the years.”

In Jon and Sansa’s case, they’re building a relationship of trust, support and love for each other, as they go through their own disagreements and discussions. It just doesn’t happen to them to agree on everything concerning the North and their home, it doesn’t just happen to them to be on the same page, yet they trust and love each other, learning how to rule together.

Besides, I don’t forget what happened in S6. They might be apart now, but I don’t forget their scenes together in S6 and not even the first 2 eps. of S7. it’s hard to get over that because of j/d fucking and be attracted to each other. 

Jon constantly looks and stares at Sansa, as if he’s trying to figure out the woman she’s grown to be and attempting to adjust himself to this new woman that doesn’t resemble one bit the Sansa he remembered back in Winterfell. A brother does not incessantly stares at his own sister like Jon does. It’s too damn weird! Why do d&d zoom in on Jon’s reaction when Sansa speaks? when she touches him? when they’re fighting? Do they really think that’s brotherly? We might say lots of things of them, but they are no fools in their job.

Above all, I could talk about the fight in the tent in S6 where the sexual tension between them almost exploded.

I mean, WHAT WAS THIS??? the director still has to explain to me what the hell they had in mind with this shot, if they weren’t planning to let the sexual tension make it to the screen. 

And the forehead kiss in 6x10 with Jon looking at her lips. Again, WHAT WAS THAT FOR? Couldn’t they just shoot a normal forehead kiss between siblings without zooming in on Jon’s face and his eyes falling on his sister’s lips like he wants to devour her mouth???

Originally posted by daughterofwinterfell

Many could tell us we’re delusional, because it never meant to be sexual, nor romantic. And that’s ok, I thought I was delusional too a year ago. Maybe it was just Kit and Sophie’s accidental chemistry that made it to the screen and thousands of fans noticed too damn well something was off and weird between these two! But then, we all start overanalyze their scenes in the year gap and we notice e.g. the zooming in on Sansa grabbing Jon’s arm, the light used during their tent scene, the fights they had like an old married couple, the constant looks that Jon throws, Ramsay’s line about Sansa being back in his bed and the close-up on Jon’s face to see his reaction to that.

Most of their scenes had a romantic undertone, and the most incredible thing is that it’s not only us as shippers, but even the media noticed it and they’ve not been subtle about Jon and Sansa becoming a couple in their own reviews.

Then, we have S7 with 2 episodes with them in it. 

Sansa grabbing his arm in 7.01 and Jon looking at her like “omg she touched me, keep it cool, Jon. Keep it cool”.

Jon throwing LF against a wall and chocking him for daring to say he loves Sansa.

“I love Sansa. As I loved her mother

Originally posted by heathergee25

In that scene LF teased him with everything he had in his hands about Jon and his past, Jon forced himself to quietly listen to him and shortly responded to him with a “get the fuck out of my life” face. He was ready to leave the crypts without any harm done, but the second Petyr mentioned he loves Sansa, Jon snapped and he snapped when LF pointed out he loves her like Cat, hence on a romantic/sexual level.

And LF was like “wtf just happened?”

Originally posted by beyondmysky

There are clueless reviewers who didn’t understand the scene at all, they cannot explain what that scene meant and you know why? because if you don’t have a mind the possibility of Jon and Sansa becoming a romantic couple, you just don’t get it. But it’s clear that Jon has becoming to brew romantic feelings for Sansa to the point of threatening men who admit to love her. I don’t think I could actually fully describe how excited and happy I am about this scene. 

Jon has no chill when it comes to Sansa, which is weird seen from a brother pov. A brother worries and wants his sister to be careful, but never rages this way and never makes possessive statements such as “Touch my sister and I’ll kill you myself.”. That was way over any brotherly threat. 

Let’s even consider how every single man that has been linked to Sansa seems quite fond to point out to Jon things extremely sexual/romantic about Sansa. WHY??? WHY TO JON OF ALL PEOPLE?? 

It cannot be just coincidence to write these lines. To me, there’s a bit of foreshadowing of Jon being the one having romantic feelings for Sansa and the one who will consummate the marriage with Sansa.

Are we excepting the Hound doing any comment about Sansa on a sexual/romantic level to Jon when they’re gonna meet? Hell, yes. Or I’ll be disappointed at this point. 

Everything points at Jonsa being endgame. We may have them at the very end of the show, but I do believe they will end up together. D&D have done questionable choices over the course of the series, but I know when they throw hints, parallels and reminders of possible future events, they’re not doing it just for fun or to confuse the fans.

J/D is the red herring couple in S7 and maybe S8, that will lead us to the real couple: Jon and Sansa. They are the endgame. 

I’m sure that whatever painful events we’re going to see this season, it’s gonna be worth it for the very end.

Southern Motherf*cking Democratic Republicans (Jefferson x Madison x Burr x Reader) 2 (Final)

Words: 2000+

Warnings: Consistent mentions of sex, flufff

A/N: i’ve been procrastinating on writing a second part to this because i suck, sorry. enjoy! also just realized that the first got more than 100+ notes? thank you loves!

Part 1


After that day, it was extremely difficult to walk out of your apartment without reporters flashing lights in your face or taking pictures of you. It was the same questions, like how does it feel to have three soulmates? And did you ever think this would happen to you? Three eligible bachelors fanning for your affection? But it was not what you imagined. It’s not what anyone imagined meeting their soulmate (correction: *soulmates) would be like.

This was just the beginning of your odd relationship with them. Burr would drop you off at work in the morning, Madison would take you to a local coffee shop on break, and Jefferson would take you home. Once he asked if you would go to his house instead, with a wink.

You didn’t.

It was hard. It was extremely hard to deal with. Your heart was torn in literally three pieces, fighting to share your love with all three of them. You were stressed, and you cursed to the universe every night. There were being even more unfair, they were making you exhausted every day.

Eliza said that you were complaining too much, and that you should appreciate what the world has given you. You retorted back, asking if she could handle having three soulmates. She blushed, wiggling her eyebrows at you.

You decided to not bring it up to her again.

After a few weeks of this, you decided to have a meeting with all three of them at your home. There were few reporters still there, and Thomas made the last few go away, with threatening to call his “resources” to make them get fired. They quickly dispersed after that, never showing their faces to you again. You shook your head at Thomas’s threat, but he insisted that it was for your privacy, and that he would do everything in his power to keep the media out of your lives.

You ordered takeout that night, the boys wanting to buy it for you instead. You scowled them for the hundredth time that day, telling them that you had enough money to spare. You appreciated their kindness, but sometimes, you wanted to treat them instead.

You heard a knock on the door, and opened it, your three soulmates standing there in front of you. You couldn’t ignore the throbbing in your chest when you saw them, the universe reminding you that you loved them more than anything. Jefferson wore a dark purple shirt tonight, his hair neatly combed (if you could do that to the curls on his head). He walked in, kissing your forehead softly. Madison strolled by next, wearing a dark blue shirt. The smile on his face made you grin back at him, he kissed your cheek. Burr was the last, wearing a black shirt. He pulled you into a hug instead, holding you as tight as possible.

They all gathered in the kitchen, sitting at the small table. You lived alone, so a small table with four chairs seemed enough for you, at the time. Now that these massive men were in your home, you made a mental note to buy a bigger table. The three of them were cramped in the apartment, constantly bumping into each other. Maybe a bigger apartment instead.

“How are you, my love?” Jefferson asked, gathering the plates.

“I’m fine, Thomas.” You replied, pulling out the rice containers. James placed his hand on the small of your back, telling you to sit down.

“We’ve got this, Y/N. You bought the food, so we’ll serve you.” Burr grabbed sodas out of the fridge, and James helped, putting ice in the cups.

You were extremely thankful for them. As you four sat down, Madison next to you and Burr and Jefferson across from you. You wanted to enjoy your moment with the boys, but you couldn’t help but bring up the point that you needed to make. They were chatting with each other, ignoring your pleas and gestures. After a minute of this, you rose you voice, causing them all to look at you.

“Listen, guys, listen. I, don’t you think our situation is weird? We’re all soulmates, isn’t that strange to you at all?” Madison was the first one to shake his head.

“Not at all. Before we met you, Thomas and I grew up knowing that there was someone out there who had the same tattoo as us. Once ours didn’t glow or hurt when we saw it, we knew there was a missing link.” Madison glanced over at Burr. “Two missing links.”

“James is right, this seems okay to me. Why, do you not like us?” Burr asked, pausing in his eating. You sighed, putting your head in your hands. You were constantly bombarded with mixed emotions from the three of them all the time. There was research done that suggests soulmates felt the pain and other emotions of their loved one, and vice versa. Since you had three, you felt all of what they felt.

Right now, you felt nervousness emulating from all of them. It was cumbersome to deal with all their emotions at the same time. Your head was throbbing, and you tried to deal with it. “No, Aaron, that’s not what I’m trying to say. I just, I don’t know if I can do this.” You whispered.

You felt a burning sensation on your arm, and looked at it quickly. The dragon tattoo on your arm was burning bright red, fading the tail of the dragon. You widened your eyes at your arm, looking at your soulmates. They were all looking at theirs as well, watching it fade.

“You’re rejecting us, Y/N?” Thomas whispered, a small bit of sorrow in his eyes.

“No, I’m not, I-“

“We’ve researched this for our whole lives, Y/N, don’t you remember? We know what happens to soulmates when one of them rejects the other. Your tattoo begins to fade. As you grow away from them, it continues to dissipate, until there is nothing left. We know what we’re talking about.” Thomas hissed, growing angry. You shook your head, looking at the dragon.

“I don’t know how I feel about all of you, about this.” You whispered. “I care about all of you, but it’s like I’m not myself anymore. It’s like, everything you guys think, everything you do, consumes me. I can’t think around you all.”

Burr grabbed your fingers, his eyes pleading with you. “We can figure this out, we are scientists. We can make it easier for you to handle. Just, just don’t give up on us, please.” Burr said desperately. You hated hearing his voice shake, but you needed some space, and space. To deal with this.

You nodded, hearing Burr sigh in relief. He was the most sensitive out of the four of you. Since you two have met, he needed constant reassurance that you were not going to leave him. You always wondered why, but never found the time to ask him about it.

“I won’t give up on you three, I need some time. I need some time to stop these headaches that I’m getting. It’s hard enough to deal with my own emotions, let alone three other people.” They nodded. You sensed relief from the rest of them, and it calmed your headache. Dealing with positive emotions were much easier than negative ones.

“Can we eat in piece, now?” Thomas mumbled, grabbing an egg roll from the pile. You smiled at him, picking the sweet and sour chicken out of the middle. “Y/N, I told you to get soy sauce.” He grumbled, staring at the sauces on the table.

“I asked the lady for it, did she not put any in the bag?” Thomas pouted, and you told him to check in the closet for sauce. Fortunately, you saved packages from previous takeout. He grinned happily, sitting back down next to Burr. “Guys, I have a question.” They all looked up at you. “Do you, do you feel the same way about each other like I feel about you. You know, romantic feelings?” Burr laughed, glancing at the two men next to him.

“Why do you ask?” Madison asked.

“Because, it seems weird that we’re soulmates and I only love you, but you don’t love each other.”

“Good question.” Thomas replied, lending you no more information. You rolled your eyes at his lack of a response.

“Come on.” You grumbled.

“We do, love each other.” Madison answered for them, twirling noodles in his fork. “Before we met you, it was more like a brotherly love. We knew we were soulmates, too, so that was kind of a given.”

Thomas interrupted Madison. “We didn’t know how many people were going to be soulmates with us, especially after we found Burr. Honestly, I thought it was going to be more than ten people, which sounds ridiculous.” He mumbled, playing with his mac and cheese. You made it for him yourself, since he was always unhappy when dinner didn’t include the “delicacy” (he called mac and cheese that constantly).

“I’m happy that it’s only four, Y/N. Three’s a crowd, four’s a party.” Burr winked, causing you to blush.

“But yes, we do love each other. Once our tattoos glowed, there was a click, at least for me, when I looked at the other two. It was like I was seeing them for the first time.” James replied, smiling at the other two. “I’m happy for us, I really am.”

“And we’ll have great sex.” Thomas murmured, making your face reddened even more than before. You were reminded of Eliza’s look when she mentioned the four of you.

“You’re embarrassing Y/N.” Burr chuckled. Thomas looked up from his food, smirking at you. He wiggled his eyebrows, nudging Burr. Burr grinned, putting his hand on Thomas’s thigh.

“Can we stop talking about the deed? I just want to watch a movie later.” You mumbled. Who knows what emotions you would feel when that happened.

“And after…?” Madison questioned, giving you an evil grin. You gasped, surprised at how blunt Madison was. He was usually the one to mediate and calm everyone down, but it seems like tonight, he was encouraging the other two. You snickered.

“Let’s just focus on the movie right now.”

“We’re definitely gonna f*ck tonight.” Thomas mumbled, and you threw a piece of bread at him. He raised his eyebrows, holding a piece of pork in his hand. You warned him with your eyes, and he grinned, tossing the piece of food at you. The sauce on it hit your face, leaving a trail of grease. You glared at him, picking up the rice container in front of you.

Thomas held his hands up in defense, looking at you. “Come on, Y/N, you started it! Just, not the rice, please. It would take me forever to get it out of my hair.” He complained, and you tossed it anyway, the pellets going on all three of you boyfriends. James sighed, picking the rice off his food. Aaron laughed, grabbing the noodle container. He looked at James, then placed it quickly on his hair, giggling evilly.

James frowned, the noodles cascading down his face. “That’s it, I’m going to stop this right now.” James grabbed the soda bottle from the middle of the table, and poured it on Aaron, and you heard a gasp come out of his mouth.

You three began this insane food fight, tossing anything that was close by. After a few minutes, all the food was on the floor, stains were everywhere; from the ceiling fan to inside your closet. When you were looking at the aftermath, they boys stared at you sheepishly. You broke out into a grin, and laughed.

“You guys are so going to help me fix this up.” James grabbed your waist and ran, carrying you in his arms. You laughed, hitting him on his back softly. “James, we need to clean this up! I don’t want it to stain!”

“We’ll clean it later, but now…” Thomas said, grinning. Aaron was hanging on Thomas’s back, all of them leading you to the bedroom. The happiness radiating from all of them made your heart swell with glee.

And that’s when you knew. You knew that you could handle being with the three of them. At this moment, you could not imagine your life without them in it.

“Are you there? Somewhere? Keeping an Eye on all of us? Hah. Who am I kidding. Of course you are.”

Quick morning sky study. Kurt just somehow appeared to show up. <3 Somehow. >> Adding own weird combo of his uniforms, because I’m never happy with official designs.

pitchfork.com
Bleachers’ Jack Antonoff Is Your Favorite Pop Star’s Secret Weapon | Pitchfork
The most trusted voice in music.

(excerpt)

How did your life as a songwriter begin?

I didn’t grab the opportunity. Fun had a hit; “We Are Young” took off [in 2012], and it happened very quickly because it was on the heels of a TV spot. The next day, every publisher called. This was right before the age of everyone moving to L.A. to be a pop songwriter. Right away, I was able to get into the bottom level of [writing] rooms, and I’m learning right away how people are doing things. Everyone wants hits. But we weren’t trying to make a hit with “We Are Young.” I don’t sit at home all day and write and produce songs. I do it because I love it. So it was weird at first, but now it’s gotten good. I’ve worked with Carly Rae Jepsen, Sara Bareilles, Tegan and Sara, Grimes, Taylor, Lorde—that’s what I want to do. I love working with women.

Why do you think you work so well with women?

I don’t know. All emotions aside, I write a full octave above where I sing. I think about Kate Bush and those registers when I’m writing, because I always imagine that vocals should be dancing on top of the track. There’s just a lot of melodic DNA that works better for women than men. And most of my favorite artists are women—outside of all the things I said about Bruce.

Also, my experiences with men and music have been in this really macho, intense, high-octane environment. I don’t want to categorize something that’s more specifically female, but I will say that, in my experience, the women that I’ve worked with have been more interested in talking about what’s gone wrong in our lives, quietly putting it to a piano, and then eventually making it into this big thing.

I only have sisters. I always want to hear women sing my songs. I just want to be around women. It’s not a sex thing—I’m heterosexual, but it’s not coming from any place like that. It’s just a comfort thing. And my studio presence isn’t bombastic, which is funny because some of the songs are. But I like to be calm. I guess I could go way deeper into certain conversations I’ve had with my analyst about not being a certain kind of man that other men think is enough of a man.

There is an archetype of the modern male producer/songwriter, like Dr. Luke, as an all-powerful figure.

It’s a position of power, but this is work where there is no power—songwriting is the most powerless, saddest, sit-there-and-pray-it’s-going-to-come-to-you experience, you fucking Little Mermaid-style poor unfortunate soul. You sit in a room for two years and make noise until it comes. You work on something for six months, and then you go to take a shower and in six minutes you have a better idea.

When I’m working with artists, there’s no power struggles, no “I got the fucking answer, I have these hits so I’m the shit.” I hate that, and I can’t be around it, because if I’m around it, it’s like someone coming into your house and taking a piss on the floor. I can’t write a song with someone who feels that way. This is my work. This is my very safe place.

How can you say there’s no power in writing songs with someone like Taylor Swift, who’s one of the biggest musicians around. There’s an enormous amount of power in that.

But there’s not. She just sits there in the same place you’re sitting, and we just talk about songs and Joni Mitchell. I mean, I won’t name names but I’ve met many other people in her position who I decided to not make music with because when we were sitting here, they were that person who wielded a lot of power. I felt there wouldn’t have been an opportunity for us to create. I have absolutely no disrespect for anyone else but, for me, making music is so private and personal. So if a popstar came in this room and was like, “Well, I’ve done this, this, and this, so I’m right,” then why are we here? I’ll just keep doodling in my journal.

How do you decide who to work with?

If I ever work with someone else, all that I think about is: Do you want to make the best album you’ve ever made in your life, or not? And if there’s even a hesitation, then go on your greatest hits tour.

anonymous asked:

jimon + they get married because one of them needs a green card but it ends up turning into something more (ahhhhhh am i dead yet??)

idek how long ago this was sent i’m so sorry!! also, i don’t know, are you dead yet??

a story the kids won’t believe || 4k+, jace/simon + fake marriage || read on ao3

.

Simon’s life gets wildly out of hand when he opens his door to a furious knocking at three in the morning on Saturday and gets a frazzled, furious Jace Wayland barging into his apartment, shouting, “You need to marry me!”

“I - “ Simon blinks at Jace, takes a step back, collides with his shoe rack, and stumbles further backwards. “Cool, okay, so like. Are you drunk?”

No.” Jace stalks forward, twisting his hand in Simon’s collar and glaring at him with a wild kind of emotion in his eyes. “If you don’t fucking marry me in the next twenty-four hours, Lewis, I am going to be deported back to France, which is a country I didn’t even know I was from until a few hours ago, so suck it up and take one for the team and marry me.”

Simon blames his half-asleep, drowsy state, and his general saint-like nature for saying yes so quickly.

.

Keep reading

….is something an *actual human adult* is choosing to get angry about.

Tomorrow: why soup is misandric.

(thanks to cybermango on Twitter for this one)

Protectors

Warning: FLUFF, sexual assault, that’s it i think.

Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester, Sister!Reader Winchester, Castiel

Summary/Request: Hi, i love your work so much! Could you do an imagine where the reader gets attacked by a drunk guy from a bar and her brothers and Cas come to the rescue. FLUFF, lots of FLUFF please. Thank you, keep writing!

Word Count: 1,209

Y/N: your name

Y/N/N: your nickname


After week of researching, kicking, ass, and many bruises finally the hunt was done. You had to say you were kind of proud of yourself, you fought off nearly an entire pack of werewolves almost without a scratch. So with a hunt all done of course you and your brothers went to a old bar to celebrate. It was all going great, until it didn’t.

You and your brothers walked into the dingy bar feeling accomplished and ready for a few glasses of cold beer. Dean walked in front as always inspecting the place for hot women while you and Sam walked behind looking for an empty table to sit. Finally you found an empty booth at the end of the place and sat down, Dean walked over to the bar to order a few beers and some food leaving you and Sam alone.

“Hey, good job back there. You really did kick their asses.” Complemented Sam as he fist bumped you and smiled.

“What can I say Sammy, I learned from the best.” You smirked back at him.

“Aww thanks Y/N/N”

“I meant Dean” You said back jokingly, smirking at him mischievously.

“You little-“

“Beer!” You yelled raising your arms as if you were a child as Dean approached the table with the drinks.

You all grabbed your drinks and began to talk, talk about the hunt, the future hunts, and everything in between until your glasses of beer were out leaving you all wanting more. Suddenly Dean’s phone began to sound so he answered while you and Sam looked at him curiously.

Keep reading

Secrets [Part 1]

Pairing: Peter X Reader
Warnings: Fighting, Language
A/N: This is a four part series and it’s one of my favourites that I wrote tbh, it’s all on my wattpad if you guys don’t want to wait for me to post the rest, but it is already complete so I’m setting all the posts on a schedule! :D Hope you guys enjoy! Btw the reader’s powers are like the flash’s, if you want an idea of how they work!

-

You weren’t exactly sure how you ended up here.

Well, that’s a lie. You knew exactly how you got here, you just weren’t sure as to why.

A couple months ago, you got into some trouble with the Falcon, and in return for him not turning you in, he asked for a favor when he needed it. So here you were, returning that favor.

You had a particular power that seemed it would come in handy, so Sam finally approached you about helping him out. He was sure to remind you that you’d be in a lab being tested on or just thrown in a jail cell if it wasn’t for him, so you readily agreed.

You thought maybe he needed you to do something for him that required going in and out quickly and not being seen. Your power helped with that. But you didn’t expect to be standing in an airport in Germany facing one half of the Avengers.

Keep reading

Naruto Canon Couples Foreshadowing

So many people post about why they think certain pairings “make no sense,” “never had development,” or why their ship is “the only couple that makes sense in the whole series”. So I decided to talk about how there isn’t only just one super special magic couple that “makes sense” in the entire Naruto series solely because you like it better than the others, and that most of the canon couples have some sort of development or moment at some point :)

I’m also just limiting this post to canon so it doesn’t get too long and out of hand! I may do a non-canon post later for fun, who knows! :)

As always, my pretty disclaimer: I am pro-Sakura. You will not find me bashing Sakura on here at all. (I wish I didn’t even have to say that… Jeez.) Oh, and same with Hinata. I won’t be spending time bashing her either. I like to keep things civil :)

And I promise I am not saying “this is why you should like and ship them so there”. That isn’t it at all!! You have the right to ship whoever you want!! (Trust me, kakasaku I also have kakasaku crack ships kakasaku that I enjoy kakasaku.)

I am just trying to express that Kishi didn’t just throw people together by drawing their names randomly from a hat.

Anyway, I won’t get into much detail, I just want to provide at least one example for most of the cannon couples on why there was, indeed, some sort of moment or hint that they might end up together and that it wasn’t “totally unexpected”.

First off, Sasusaku:

I hate when people claim that Sakura and Sasuke have “no development”. Just because you do not want to acknowledge the development does not mean it never happened. Some people try to make it sound like Sakura and Sasuke never ever freaking met each other until the last chapter. Since it’d take way too much time to go over and explain everything related to Sasuke and Sakura’s development because there is a ton of it, I’ll just hit a major point or two.

If you want to discount any interactions between Sasuke and Sakura between the beginning of the series until the chunin exams, I’m okay with that. A lot of people don’t care about it (not me personally though). But the moment Sasuke received that curse mark, Sasuke and Sakura’s relationship took a much more serious turn. In fact, many people began shipping them around that time. Even the data books state that it was Sakura’s heart that helped Sasuke keep his curse mark from controlling him (ya know, in case you couldn’t already tell that from reading and watching it all unfold in the forest of death).

I also chose this moment as an example because after this point, it’s quite hard to argue that Sakura just had superficial feelings for Sasuke. She had seen the darkness taking control of him, and wanted to be at his side and help him stop it from ruining him. She didn’t want to run away because it was too much drama for her or just his problem. She saw how much he suffered, and she wanted nothing more but to help him.

Okay, I could go on forever about that moment, since it’s one of my favorites, but my point is that moment alone should show that there was SOME development. This is when Sakura’s love became completely selfless, in my opinion, as well. It was a really big moment, not only in personal character development, but in the relationship between the two as well. It was one of the reasons, I’m sure, that Sasuke thanked Sakura before he left the village (the first time). I won’t go into that moment, however, because it’s pretty self explanatory (although people to love to argue about it).

Honestly I could make a huge blog post just dedicated to the development of SasuSaku alone (which, hell, I may just end up doing later), so I will just move on before I start. Point was to give you a moment of development.

I really want to bring up the Sakura bringing Sasuke back to the right dimension thing right now too, but that will have a lot of explaining to it as well because of some of the ridiculous arguments around that… SAVE IT FOR ANOTHER BLOG POST MEGAN AND MOVE ON ALREADY.

Now for NaruHina:

I know, I know. It’s not everyone’s favorite couple. I think the reason for that is a good chunk of the NaruSaku fans are bitter (I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be, I’m just saying it’s a reason why).

But it was foreshadowed. I could even tell that while reading the chunin exam chapters as a kid.

It wasn’t all about Hinata’s growth as a character in the exams. It was about how her respect and love for Naruto helped get her there. (I won’t lie though, I do not enjoy that so much of her character was based on Naruto. I feel like Kishi should have given her more of a chance to stand up for herself because of something other than her love for Naruto. I mean, women can do things without men around ya know!)

It also showed that Naruto started to notice her as a person, rather than the weird girl who gets shy around him.

Hinata was also shown to be the only girl who liked Naruto for himself as children. She wasn’t a Sasuke fangirl like the majority of the girls. That was a big part of why she ended up with him (and yes, I know Sakura and Naruto became close, but that isn’t what we are arguing about right now. Plus, as I mentioned in another post, I see Naruto and Sakura’s development as platonic.)

And then Kishi even had the whole war scene. But I won’t get into that, because it’s a bit self explanatory and I don’t feel the need to get into it.

ShikaTema:

Honestly, I don’t think I need to defend them. Their fanbase never really argues about what development they did or didn’t have (that I have seen at least). The little drama about the pairing is always so pleasant. (Well, until someone says “They are the only pairing that ever had development!” and start a fight. Hence why I am blogging this.)

ShikaTema’s development (for me) began when she helped him against the sound ninja (one of my favorite moments, by the way). I know people can use the chunin exams as an example of development, which is a-okay, but I personally didn’t feel it there (but again, that is JUST ME).

Also, remember when Shikamaru’s dad told him that No matter how strong-minded a woman is, she will show kindness to the man she loves” That description TOTALLY describes Temari. Super foreshadowing!! :) That cute smile she gave him after she blew away that sound ninja, that did it for me. Loved it so much. Then Temari snapped right back and became the strong/blunt woman she is once again when she had to help snap Shikamaru back into his senses when he became irate at himself about letting Choji almost die.

Oh, and please let me add this too, because it made me happy as well:

SaiIno:

As for SaiIno, they didn’t really have development, per say, in the manga besides a few small hints (Ino stating she thought Sai was cute, and including Sai in her dream during the war where he fought Sasuke over her).

Plus there was this cute little bit from one of Kishi’s side chapters:

But with this couple, I feel like Kishi put them together because, well, it just made sense.

What I mean is that, to me, it makes sense because Sai is able to take Ino’s last name, so the new InoShikaCho formation could exist (well, by name anyway). Plus Sai feels more like he belongs to a family now I’m sure, considering he was just known by one name, which wasn’t even his birth name to begin with (I hate Danzo so much I really really do). Plus, Sai seems pretty happy, and I love seeing Sai happy :) (Plus, Ino’s sassiness with Sai’s bluntness! Perfect combination!) However I will agree there was barely any development for SaiIno.

… And honestly, I have nothing for Choji and his wife. No one really does. That was pretty random. I like it though. Chocho is freaking adorable with all that sass.

Okay so this is getting too long, so I’ll stop here for now. I guess I just wanted to point out some solid “there was development” moments.

Hope I didn’t bore ya! Thank you for reading :) I really appreciate it!

Vampire: the Masquerade Clan Haiku (I am so sorry)

Camarilla Clans:

Brujah
Near Dark was so good
like when they bar-fight bikers?
that was my sire

Gangrel
we are not just beasts!
we are men! we are - shit! cat!
bark! bark! BARKBARKBARK!!!

Malkavian
if i spoke prose they
would all find out I don’t know
what I talk about

Nosferatu
hey there count orlok
oh fuck, i am so sorry
that was pretty rude

Toreador
i really enjoyed
interview with a vampire
not so much these days

Tremere
hey is that your clan’s
deep-sleeping progenitor?
asking for a friend

Ventrue
i can tell you to
eat all of this old cat food
and I bet you would

Sabbat Clans:

Tzimisce
i made you a gift
out of you and me and him
and this horse. you like?

Lasombra
could you tell me if
i put my lipstick on straight?
you better not lie

Independant Clans:

Assamite
our clan is run by
a baby wizard demon
not even kidding

Giovanni
no bad has ever
come from killing your sire
the master of death

Ravnos
our founder was slain
by a big crossover event
you’re surprised we freaked?

Followers of Set
i promise this time
it is not snakes and evil
haha, no, it is.

Bloodlines: 

True Brujah
some serious-ass
doctor who shit in this clan
but no amy pond :(

Samedi
have you heard the one
about the gawker I made
into a raisin? :|

Nagaraja
that’s some fine-lookin’
skin you are wearing like a
hot people gyro

Kiasyd
I can assure you
we know how weird our shit is
we have to live this

Daughters of Cacophony
it’s not how you sing
but how you kill all men with
song. also how you sing. 

Baali
did you think Setites
were the authority on
making players squick? 

Children of Osiris 
no one has ever
actually played this clan
except that one guy

Blood Brothers
playing a single
blood brother is like eating
just one dorito

Harbingers of Skulls
we forgive you for
diablerizing our liege
but not the incest

Caitiff
don’t hate me because
i picked all the physical
disciplines. #YOLO 

Old Clan Tzimisce
we don’t even want
the best discipline ever.
BECAUSE REASONS, MAN.

Gargoyle
guess how few players
named their dude goliath and
got away with it? >:|

just ~lesbian who didn’t realize she was a lesbian because of compulsory heterosexuality~ things:

  • mistaking positive attention from men as attraction to them
  • mistaking lack of abuse from men as attraction to them
  • mistaking a man having an interesting face or outfit or general aesthetic as attraction to him
  • having weird (platonic) relationships with men as a result of all of the above
Fangirls - A Slam Poem

Dedicated to @the-gayyyyliens and @the entire CYM Discord server for bullying me into posting it.

You read us bedtime stories when we were young.

You laughed as we played pretend that we were fairies,

and wizards, and knights in shining armor.

So what did you expect?

We wished on dandelions and falling stars,

asking for superpowers so we could save the day.

What did you expect?

Years later, it’s unrealistic to wish on a star.

“Work to make your dreams come true!”

It’s unacceptable to play pretend,

“You’re wishing your life away!”

Well, maybe I am.

We read novels about daring adventures,

We play games about magical wonderlands,

because what else can I do

to escape?

He looks at the camera, smiles, and says “Hello,”

and I know, I know he’s not speaking to me,

but it makes me happy.

The dedication in the front of the book says

“For all the amazing women

I’ve met, and those I haven’t,

who battle with dark days.”

We are those women,

those women who need to escape,

the men who just need a reason to smile.

Yes, I cry when my favorite character dies,

because I felt that character.

I knew that character.

I was that character.

Yes, I cry when I meet my favorite YouTuber because

does he know?

Does he know that his laugh has saved lives,

that his smile gave me mine?

You tell me to get a life,

get a real job,

make a living,

find a husband,

have children,

be just like everyone else,

but that’s not me.

Does she know?

Does she know that she made me realize I like men and women,

that I love music more than I love myself?

And I know that this is weird and different,

but so do all of them.

And we don’t care.

Because that book kept me going.

Every minute I stayed up reading “just one more page”

is another minute I could have spent hurting myself, hating myself.

Every costume I put on

makes me feel alive,

because I want to play pretend today,

and I’m going to do it with other people who grew up reading bedtime stories.

So do they know that they saved us?

Do you know that they saved us?

It doesn’t matter.

The razor didn’t hurt me because they told me to put it away before it could,

and they didn’t even say it with words.

Dean, but... not Dean - Dean Winchester x Reader

Title: Dean, but… not Dean

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 3,562

Warnings: None

Prompt: Hi! This is a request for a fic/imagine where dean and Y/N are a couple and get gender swapped accidentally basically. I think you’ve done that before? So something like that but different obviously.

You rubbed your eyes feelings more sore than any other time. You were known for loving sleep, who didn’t after all, and whenever you had the chance to - at least when this life allowed you to - you would end up sleeping till very late. But today for some reason you had broken every record you had. And that wasn’t the weirdest thing of all, because the previous day had been especially hard anyway.

Your body felt particularly heavy, more so than any other time. You didn’t even open your eyes as you sleepily made your way to the bathroom. You knocked on a few things but didn’t pay attention still, your vision slightly blurry. Well, it certainly cleared out when your eyes widened at the sight on the mirror.

The person staring back at you certainly wasn’t you. Not the you you had come to know over the years and not the you that stared at you every morning you looked into this specific mirror. For a moment you through Dean had played a joke on you but first; there was no way that man was going to wake up earlier than you, he was more of a sleeper (one of the things that made you love him all the more) and second and most important; the moment you made a move so did the person in the mirror.

And as if the thought of what that witch-bitch aid before she fell down was not disturbing enough the fact that the person staring back at you made it all even more worrying. You narrowed your eyes at the mirror and sure the person did the same. Everything started making sense and that was the most disturbing: it wasn’t a dream. It was all very real.

Short hair, sharp jaw with a slight scruff that you definitely didn’t have. Firm and broad chest that was covered in only a black t-shirt. Muscular arms and pretty much everything else that could show that you were no longer yourself but… a man. And not just any man. But Dean freaking Winchester.

“Fucking hate witches.” you grumbled, Dean’s voice surprising you when it came out of you.

Keep reading

god I hate live action Beauty and the Beast: a roast post

I’m sick of yall telling me I gotta like this glitter glue cupcake and that if I don’t I’m a monster. Here’s a list of everything I hate personally and you can’t stop me

*Oh my God the beast face. Ooooh my god. They reduced his animalistic features so he no longer has the trademark hunch, lowered brow, or tusks. He has little baby vampire teeth. Pathetic. Give him tusks you cowards

*Because they reduced that it looks like a human face with a large nose photoshopped onto an uncomfortably large buffalo head and it made me queasy every time he was on screen

*Nearly all the object servants have hollow soulless beady eyes which also weirded me out to the point where I wanted them off the screen as soon as possible

*The camerawork for Evermore suggests it’s supposed to be sweeping and grand but why in God’s good name did they go through all the trouble and effort into writing a bland and inferior version of If I Can’t Love Her that isn’t musically interesting and doesn’t reach the high notes it should. Go listen to If I Can’t Love Her and then Evermore and tell me which one is better. Spoiler alert. It’s not Evermore.

*Everything is so extra. Please let me rest. Literally does everything need 3 layers of tarnished gold filigree. Leave my eyes alone

*Cry “practical simple elegance” all you want, that dress looks like a $100 Macy’s prom dress and was clearly designed for easy merchandising. At the very least give her the gloves oh my god

*why the F U C K would you take out the iconic stained glass intro for live action

*Emma Watson can’t sing. If they did put the Broadway songs in, no way could she pull off Home. She can’t do it. No harm in it but she wasn’t cut out for these songs

*They put the cut line about growing a beard again back in which implies Belle is a massive furry and into ripped buffalo men

*Lefou being gay is fine. I’m glad Disney at least attempted some kind of representation after all these years. But I really wish that his happy ending A: wasn’t a short 2 second clip at the end and B: Didn’t involve the other guy being from a man-in-a-dress joke that the audience was seemingly supposed to laugh at because that seems to imply that Disney thinks men trying feminine clothing and liking it instantly makes them gay which is giving me very bad 1990s Will and Grace vibes which should not be going on in 2017

*fuck i hate the beast’s big weird face

*I don’t know if it’s just me but the CGI makes it look like there’s a bigger age gap than there really is which also worsens the terminal case of Big Weird Face syndrome

*Lumiere is cheating the curse because he’s technically just a tiny brass man.

*Don’t know why Plumette has a bird face. That was freaking me out too

*Court composer maestro piano man is giving me very deep and horrifying flashbacks to the Tim Curry CGI Organ Guy from enchanted christmas and I never want that to be remembered

*Beast’s big lumpy photoshopped uncanny valley baby fangs lumpy lump face on his lumpy head

*removed illiterate Beast subplot

*no Human Again. It’s been 15 years. At least give me that

Long story short I will unapologetically hate this unnecessary cash grab for the fraud that I believe it is, knowing all the while yall ate it up and we’re gonna have to sit through more years of excessive live action remakes because of your collective buffoonery. If you like it, fine. I can’t stop you. But at least know the reason it was made wasn’t out of popular demand.

I literally fucking hate how society blames women for being catty and bitchy and passive aggressive while men are praised for being straightforward and just fighting and getting shit out of the way because 1st of all shut up with these weird generalisations but 2nd yall realise that women are literally raised to keep their mouths shut and be good and polite and keep unpleasant things to ourselves right?? so when someone we know hurts us the only thing we can fucking do is go and talk to other people and fucking vent and so yeah I’m gonna be passive aggressive as shit if I don’t like you because I am not gonna be nice if someone is shitty but I was also raised not to make a scene and to sit down and shut up so I’m gonna let out my aggression in subtweets and snarky comments like just stop

Short Story time

So I work at a gym and today this older white man (a gym member) came to the front desk, and he was having a conversation with my manager, who is black. I could hear their convo and this is what I overheard:

Man: yeah thanks for the help, man.

My manager: no problem sir, happy to help.

Man: you know black men are great when they aren’t trying to mug you hahaha

My manager:

My manager:

My manager: have you ever been mugged by a black man?

Man: no

My manager: do you know any black men who have mugged somebody?

Man: well no-

My manager: so all of the black men you know are great, then yeah? And that’s also a weird phrase to use because that would imply that anyone who doesn’t mug you is a great person, which I assure you is not the case. In fact, I ran into a racist guy today, he didn’t mug me, but he definitely wasn’t great.

Man: *turns and leaves*

Me to my manager: beast.

The Strange Men Series cast are all looking at a broken coffee machine
  • Keith: All right, who broke it? I'm not mad. I just wanna know who.
  • David: It was me, I broke it, let me pay for-
  • Keith: No. No you didn't. Paul?
  • Paul: Don't look at me! Look at Marion!
  • Marion: What? I didn't break it!
  • Paul: Huh. That's weird. How did you know it was broken?
  • Marion: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's BROKEN.
  • Paul: Suspicious....
  • Marion: No, it's not!
  • Sophie: If it matters, probably not, but Regan was the last one to use it
  • Regan: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
  • Sophie: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
  • Regan: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles everyone knows that, Sophie!!!
  • David: Ok, ok, let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Keith
  • Keith: NO. Who broke it?
  • Paul: ...Shirley's been awfully quiet
  • Shirley: reALLY?!
  • Paul: YEAH, REALLY!!!
  • Everyone: *Fighting*
  • Keith:
  • Keith: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. Its was getting a little chummy around here.
I am not a bartender

🌼REQUESTED! I HOPE YOU WILL LIKE IT🌼

CRIMINAL MINDS; SPENCER REID X READER

Prompt: the reader and Spencer meets again while visiting Diana after some years he left Las Vegas.

@overcastmisfitkid @paradiselover-18

~~~~~~~~~~

Spencer was at the reception waiting for a nurse to tell him where his mom was. His team had just solved a case in Las Vegas and he took the opportunity to visit his mom. It had been six month that he had not visited Diana and so, there he was.
When Bethany, one of the oldest nurse came to him she immediately smiled and greeted him. They had known each other for six years, since he was eighteen and he recovered Diana here.
She told him she was in the garden and so he went down the stairs he had just walked up and got the backyard. It was a peaceful place, with a fountain and several wooden benches. In one of them, he spotted his mom sat with another woman. Dark hair fell on her shoulder and she was beautiful seeing her from away and he was sure she was more than beautiful when he’d got nearer. But who was that woman who was talking to his mom? He didn’t think to know her. No, he definitely didn’t.
When he was standing in front of the bench, Diana finally noticed her beloved son.

“Oh Spencer, love what are you doing here?”

He kissed his mom cheek and gave her the flowers he bought for her, then he turned his face to the mysterious girl and he could recognize her eyes, the way she smiled. He couldn’t believe you were here.

“(Y/n)?” he asked with a kind smile.

“Spencer wow! You are… wow. How are you?”

You were shocked because since the last tike you saw him he grew up a lot. He was a man and you couldn’t lie, he was more handsome than he was before.
He hugged you tightly because he was really happy to see you again.
This hug was different from the last one he gave you six years before, it was stronger, full of happiness and feelings you couldn’t understand.
It ha been about six years since the moment he moved to Washington D.C. leaving you alone in Las Vegas. He didn’t do it with bad intentions, you always encouraged him to follow his dreams and heart, but you didn’t believe it would ended with him leaving you and Diana.
But now you were in his arms and you were able to forget how bad he made you feel years before.
When he put his mom in the clinic you didn’t have the strenght to go and visit her, but then your dark period passed, you went to her and it became an habit to stay with her. It was like a mom for you and it was the less you could do.
Spencer sat between ‘his favourite women’, as he used to call you two and he listened at how you took care of Diana and how lovely you were.
It was your style, worry for others and he was glad that you were there for his mom.

You were so into the talk that you almost didn’t notice that it was about time to leave for you. You worked the evening and it was not that good when you got late at your job place.

“I think I have to go but Diana tomorrow I will be here again, ok? And Spencer, it was so nice to see you again, maybe we could get a coffe when you will be here again the next time.”

You gave her an hug and did the same thing with Spencer, but you gave him a really big kiss on his cheek that he turned red. It was strange to feel your lips on his skin again.

“Love go with her, I am sure you have a lot to talk about.”

“It is better not, stay here Spencer. Maybe we can see each other another time?”

Your tone were full of shame. He couldn’t see where you worked at, you were sure he wouldn’t been happy about it and you would been so embarrassed.
But he couldn’t let you go alone. His mom was right, you two had to talk, it was true, but you tried to convince him to see him another time.

End of the story? You two had walked through the streets for about ten minutes before getting your little apartment in the worst part of the city.
When he still was there, you lived in big and wonderful home and now he couldn’t understand how you ended there, in that dangerous part of the city.

When you came out of the door with your work bag on your shoulder, you had no choice but let him see what you did to live.
‘Piece of Heaven’ was the name of the strip club where you worked at.

“Oh, you work as a bartender here?” he asked naively when you were in front of the club.

You smiled sadly and told him that you were not a bartender.

“Then why are you here?”

“Spencer, did your IQ got lower by accident? I am a stripper. You know, a girl who dance practically naked for…”

“(Y/n) I know who a stripper is but…”

He looked down at his feet with his hands in his pockets. How did you end this way, that what he asked you. It was not your plan. When he left, you were about to get into college to study psychology and you had a good life: as said before, a big house, an average-high lifestyle and even if you were not that popular girl in the school, everyone loved you. And now you were the opposite.

“Do you like working here? I mean, is it a choice you did yourself?”

“My parents left for another State after you did and so I didn’t have too much money. I had to leave college and I had to find a job.”

He told you that it was not your place, that if he needed his help he would have given you it.
Diana didn’t know about your job because you didn’t want to make her ashamed of you.
But it was a job you could pay your house and food with, so it was ok. At least, you had it to be ok.

“Spencer you wanna stay? Because if you do, I can dance just for you and not for other pervert men. I would be more comfortable. Even if comfortable means dancing naked in front of my childhood best friend. Would that be weird? I mean, you are handsome and all and I bet that you would like seeing a woman dancing just in her panties and…”

You were not able to finish your rambling-speech because his soft lips were suddenly pressed to yours. It passed some seconds before you started moving your lips too. They were so soft and and comfortable. Just once you almost kissed in your past and even if you had to wait years to finally complete that step, you were glad.
He slowly removed his mouth from yours and took a breath, leaning his forehead against yours.

“I don’t want you to dance for me. Come to Quantico with me. Tomorrow my team’s jet is leaving. Please (y/n).” he whispered.

“Are you telling me to leave my life here and move to another State to start it all again?”

He chuckled.

“I am asking you to move in with me. I have loved you since we were 11 years old, we were just kids and now we are 24 and I still love you in the same way, and I think you love me too. So, why still remain separated?”

Would you went home and take your few thing to leave and start again a life with that man? Yes.