Pussy Tea (make your kitty taste great) 😛

1. You will need: a bag of frozen or fresh cranberries, 2 cinnamon sticks, loose tea leafs (I use a cinnamon blend from David’s tea or plain black tea) and liquid cranberry pills (this is optional but you should have these already if you want a tasty 🐱)
2. Add one cup of the cranberries to a pot of 4 cups of boiling water.
3. Pop in the cinnamon sticks and add a table spoon of the loose tea.
4. Cut open 1-5 cranberry pills and add liquid to the water (optional but works faster)
5. Let boil for 5-10 mins.
6. Remove from heat and strain the liquid into a cup.
7. Drink up! I swear by this and it’s soo tasty, sweet and doesn’t add any extra calories to your diet! This will make your kitty deadly sweet so I recommend drinking this at maximum 3 times a week !!!

✨Hoe tips #1 -✨💆🏻

Hope you like my first hoe tips and beauty tips thread! These pearls of wisdom really help me a lot. Let me know what you think.


-💗 COCONUT OIL WILL TURN YOUR HAIR INTO SILK leave on overnight or if u don’t have time use a hairdryer to heat ur hair for 10 minutes for the oil to sink in. Wash with shampoo to make sure the oil is out and enjoy ur beautiful hair

-💗 tie your hair before you sleep and during sex, preferably in a ponytail or a very loose and low bun, if its damaged and tangles/frizzes easily in bed. Trust me this has saved my hair from breaking apart

-💗 chuck out ur foam and shave ur coochie with baby oil hell shave ur whole body with this beautiful oil just be careful not to apply it too close to the vaginal opening as u should only wash that area with water or a feminine wash

-💗 bicarbonate of soda or COFFEE granules are cheap easy and natural face scrubs/masks and will leave ur skin baby soft

-💗 for acne - sudocrem, witch hazel oil, tea tree oil are all cheap and effective

-💗 honey, lemon juice and olive oil mask for acne scars use everyday or every other day for half an hour and keep it up for a few months

-💗 don’t use coconut oil to moisturise ur face it has been proved it blocks ur pores which can cause acne

-💗 always leave spare clean panties, leggings/trackies and a top in ur car so if u stay round someone’s place u can sleep and chill comfortably n keep sexy underwear with u in ur bag just incase

-💗 a cup of apple cider vinegar in your bath will restore ur coochie’s pH to its normal state so less discomfort for u ☺️

-💗 for soft baby feet, pumice the dry heels then coat them with Vaseline and put clean socks over before u sleep and ur bae will be wanting to stroke them all day

-💗if ur into guys, carry condoms in ur purse at all times; don’t expect them to provide them all the time because truth is they don’t always n u don’t wanna be in that position where ur risking ur sexual health

-💗 combo of double wear foundation n urban decay all nighter setting spray is sex proof

-💗 coconut oil is good natural lube for giving head to guys , and the taste is good too.

More to come! ❤️

How to burn calories

- Eat yogurt! Studies have shown that people who ate low fat yogurt lost 70% more fat than those who didn’t.

- The more you increase the intensity in your workouts, you’ll burn more fat faster than regular aerobic exercises.

- Iron helps oxygen get to your cells and if your cells aren’t getting enough oxygen, your metabolism will start to slow down.

- Drink water! Water helps your body perform better and increases your metabolism up to 30%. The colder it is, the better it is.

- Alcohol slows down your metabolism, it’s not healthy and you should try to stay away from it.

- Drinking green tea can increase your metabolism and it helps you burn up to 60 calories a day!

Please message me any tips you’d like me to post

How to wash your hair.

I’ve been doing it wrong apparently.

  1. Use lukewarm water. Not hot.
  2. Don’t use more than a coin-sized shampoo dollop.
  3. Only shampoo the roots - it dries out the ends.
  4. Only condition the ends - it makes the roots oily.
  5. Double shampoo, single conditioner.
  6. Comb in the shower before rinsing out the conditioner.
  7. Pat dry with a towel - rubbing breaks it.
  8. Use coconut oil or argan oil on the ends whilst damp to avoid splits.
  9. Let it air dry whenever possible - artificial heat makes it brittle.
Self care

Ok so I really believe that if you feel good about yourself it will radiate through you and you will look beautiful because of your confidence. And self care and healthy lil tips make me feel beautiful so:

Drink water. You know those annoying red bumps on your face that aren’t full on pimples so they’re really hard to get rid of? Drink a gallon of water every day. It sounds like a lot but they will disappear, and water has so many other benefits with skincare and weight loss.

Moisturize! I love almond oil for my face because it’s like coconut oil except it won’t clog your pores. Honestly as long as you consistently moisturize your face and body with some kind of lotion you’ll see benefits, it’s not complicated.

Exfoliate! Okay you can go buy an expensive exfoliated but if you’re ballin on a budget just mix some oil (coconut, olive, almond, etc.) with some sugar for your body, or with baking soda for your face. The baking soda is gentler.

Apple cider vinegar! Shits not tasty but if you add a tablespoon to a big glass of water plus some lemon (and stevia to taste) to begin your day there are benefits to your metabolism and anti bloating properties.

As for holy grail skin care ingredients, I love turmeric. Combine 1 tsp turmeric powder, 2 tbsp flour, 2-3 tbsp milk, 1 tbsp almond or coconut oil and a little bit of honey. Put on face for 20 minutes and wash off. You will glow.

Take baths because they are so great. Light some candles, get some wine or a good book, whatever makes you relaxed. There is literally a bath for everything. Sore muscles? Epsom salt. Trying to balance your skin’s ph (aka you have a dick appointment)? ¾ cup apple cider vinegar. Dry skin? Oil or oatmeal. So many options.

As for makeup, I found that when I quit makeup I found more confidence in myself and less pressure to look perfect, but if you want to beat your face every day then do it! I admire the dedication. Do what makes you feel beautiful because if you feel good, you look good.

Take care of yourself, you deserve it.

cold weather survival tips so y’all can start the new year with soft glowy skin

I posted a list of beauty tips for hot weather on my old blog at the beginning of the summer and it went over really well, so I thought I’d do a cold weather version now that we’re in peak chapped-lips-and-cracked-hands season.

  • Do yourself a favor by going to the nearest drugstore and buying the biggest tub of Vaseline/petroleum jelly you can find. 90% of Dry Skin Problems™ can be solved by slapping some Vaseline on there. 
  • Seriously. Chapped lips? Use Vaseline as a lip balm. Dry, cracked heels? Slather those feetsies with Vaseline right before you go to bed (just put socks on to keep from getting your sheets all sticky) for an overnight moisturizing treatment. (You can do the same thing on your hands if they’re dry and cracked!) I’ve even used Vaseline to fix severe dry patches on my face and neck. This stuff is a lifesaver. 
  • (You might also wanna get one of those tiny mini tubs to keep in your jacket pocket or in your bag, so you’ll always have it on you. It works way better than lip balm and is the only thing that can keep my lips from cracking and bleeding all winter long.)
  • While you’re at the store, it’s a good idea to invest in a good lotion. Most scented lotions (especially Bath & Body Works brand) actually make my dry skin worse because of the perfume in them, so you might want to look into an unscented formula. Try to avoid formulas that contain alcohol (which is sometimes used to make the lotion absorb faster) because they’ll dry you out worse than before. 
  • I always recommend using lotions and moisturizers made for sensitive skin even if your skin isn’t actually sensitive, because they don’t have as many harsh ingredients that might draw moisture out of your skin! Looking for formulas with all-natural ingredients (like Burt’s Bees and Yes To) is another good way to avoid heavy chemicals.
  • Replace your makeup remover with olive oil. It melts makeup right off, and you don’t have to scrub at your face like you do with a lot of makeup removers. It’s also super hydrating and makes my skin feel SO SOFT after I use it. (Just be sure to wash it off with a cleanser before you go to bed.) A lot of people use coconut oil the same way, but I’ve never tried it so I can’t speak for how well it works compared to olive oil. 
  • If your foundation sticks really noticeably to the dry patches on your face, a good hydrating makeup primer can help a lot. e.l.f. has really good, really cheap primers that I swear by, and they even have one specifically made for dry skin! (And you can find them at Walmart and most drugstores, so you can swing by and pick it up while you’re getting your groceries.)
  • Avoid “matte” or “mattifying” foundation formulas in general if your skin is really dry, because they’ll just make your dry patches more noticeable. Use a “satin finish” or “dewy finish” foundation instead, and if you want to make it look more matte you can always set it with a powder to take away the shine! 
  • If your lips are really dry and scaly, the best thing to do is just exfoliate the dead skin away. You can make your own lip scrub really easily by mixing sugar with either olive oil or honey, and just rub it on your lips to buff off the dry skin. Be sure to follow with Vaseline or a good lip balm!
  • As a matter of fact, you should really be exfoliating your entire face once or twice a week, especially if you have really dry skin. You can buy exfoliating scrubs at the store for a few bucks or make your own. (My favorite is a homemade scrub with 1 tablespoon of cooled green tea, 2 tablespoons of sugar, and a few drops of tea tree oil. It makes my skin soooo soft and helps fade my acne scars.)
  • Consider replacing your moisturizer with a face-safe oil like jojoba or rosehip at night. (I wouldn’t recommend using olive oil or coconut oil for this though, because they’re a little too heavy.) I started using rosehip oil every night to help with the scarring on my face, and it makes my skin feel so good. It doesn’t absorb right away, so it’s almost like sleeping in a face mask every night, and you wake up with a baby-soft face. This is the first winter I haven’t had really dry patches on my face, and I think using facial oils has a lot to do with it.
  • If your lipstick is drying out your lips, use a very light layer of Vaseline as a lip primer! This also makes the lipstick go on smoother – I’ve been using this trick for chalky/streaky lipsticks for years. (I told you, Vaseline is a lifesaver.)
  • I know everyone on tumblr is always saying this, but it really is important; you gotta stay hydrated. Drink water. (Drinks like soda actually dehydrate you, so it really does have to be water.) If your skin is just feeling a little dryer than usual, it could be because you just aren’t getting enough water. Increasing your water intake is a really easy, completely free way to help your skin out. 
  • And fyi, these tips aren’t just for girls! If you’re a guy with dry skin, feel free to use any and all of the things I talked about in this post! Taking care of your body is gender neutral and everybody deserves to have nice skin. 
Hoe tips #2 💗🌟

Hi beautiful ladies, I’m here with more tips from my experiences and to help u with day to day hoeing and health n beauty tips 💜 enjoy ur day

✨- every hoe who drives should have a car ‘kit’ in the glove compartment or somewhere to store:
-backup contraception and condoms (sexual health is 🔑)
-baby wipes
-deodorant
-gum
-tampons
-water bottle
-both spare sexy panties and chill panties
-chill clothes than can double as pj’s (tracksuits, leggings, vest etcetera)
-lotion

✨- use shimmer body lotion to make ur skin n limbs look radiant n a lil sexier than they already do (beautiful hoes come in all shapes n sizes💜) even a cheap one like dove or VS does the trick n ur skin feels soft to touch too

✨- don’t forget to castor oil ur eyebrows every night

✨- be a confident hoe.. Smile more n sit with good posture n u will appear more confident n approachable

✨- warm n wet camomile tea bags help get rid of eye infections n eye bags really well and it works amazingly for tired puffy eyes too lay down for a while and place them on ur closed eyes

✨- WATER n green tea, drink them both (skip the tea if ur caffeine sensitive)

✨- if u self tan like me, get you some exfoliating gloves. Actually everyone get them, they revolutionised my skincare routine n now I don’t need to buy or make body scrubs unless I wanna treat myself on the odd occasion

✨- always wear spf on ur face and under ur makeup even when it’s cloudy

✨- always wash ur face in cool or lukewarm water n avoid doing it in the hot shower as the heat n pressure can upset the skin

✨- as tempting as it is to make it smell like ur shower product for when ur getting head, don’t clean ur coochie with ur shower gel it can upset the pH n cause infections such as thrush and BV as well as parched skin

✨- spray ur pressure points (behind ears, insides of elbows n knees, inner thighs, décolletage, wrists) n ur perfume will linger all day

✨- exfoliate ur lips too! Make ur own white sugar scrub (or buy from LUSH) or use a wet flannel or an old toothbrush n rub very gently

how to do prom on a budget

Because not everyone can afford to spend a ridiculous amount of money on one high school dance, but that absolutely does not mean that you can’t enjoy your evening to the fullest. 

  • Your prom dress definitely does not have to cost several hundred dollars. Amazon.com has some really nice formal dresses, and most of them are in the $50-100 range! (I know there are other websites specifically for discount prom dresses, but in my experience Amazon has better quality and lower prices. Plus prime shipping can be a lifesaver if you’re in a rush.)
  • And if fifty bucks is still out of your price range (and I know that it is for a lot of people), check your local thrift stores. Second-hand prom dresses sell for a fraction of their original price, and they’ve usually only been worn once or twice. Seriously, I got my first prom dress at a thrift store; it was a very pretty, very well-made dress, and I payed $15 for it. Check. Thrift. Stores. 
  • Or, if you just don’t like second-hand clothes or if you couldn’t find anything good in the thrift stores, check Ross or a similar store. (Ross is just what we have in my hometown.) They usually stock some formal dresses around prom season, and they’re almost all in the $20-30 range. I’ve gone to formal events in dresses from Ross before, and they hold up really well and look great in pictures.
  • All of the stores I just mentioned are also really good places to get shoes, jewelry, ect. to go with your dress. Even stores like Walmart and Target might be good places to look for shoes, bags, and other accessories. And definitely check your own wardrobe – you might already own stuff that will look good with your dress. (I’ve worn the same pair of heels to, like, three different proms at this point tbh.) 
  • Get a dress that fits you well without alterations. Seriously, tailors are so pricey – you’ll probably end up paying several times more for alterations than you did for the dress itself. You’ll save yourself a lot of money if you just buy a dress that already fits and looks good. 
  • Do your own hair and makeup. There are approximately two billion “prom hair and makeup” tutorials on YouTube – find one that you like and practice it a couple of times before the big night. 
  • And if you aren’t confident enough to do it yourself, call in a friend for help. I’m totally useless when it comes to hair, but my best friend is a hair genius. We would always get ready for dances together, and we’d do a trade-off; she’d do my hair for me, and I’d help her with her makeup, and then we’d both go to the dance looking amazing. It’s a good system, and makes getting ready a lot more fun.
  • Or, if you don’t want to do your own makeup and don’t have a friend you can ask, a lot of department stores that have makeup counters (Macy’s, Belk, ect.) will do free makeovers, even if you don’t buy any of the products! I had a friend in high school who always got her makeup done at Belk for school dances. I don’t like trusting a stranger to do my makeup, but it is an option if you want to get it done professionally without spending a lot of money. (MAC and Sephora both do “free” makeovers, but only if you make a $50 purchase first, so probably not the best option if you’re trying to save money. Always make sure that the makeover service really is free before you sit down in the makeup chair.)
  • Also, you absolutely do not have to wear dramatic makeup or complicated hairstyles to prom if you don’t want to. If bold makeup isn’t your thing, you can just do mascara and a little bit of lip gloss. If you don’t want to spend two hours on your hair, just wear it down, or pin it up in a really simple bun, or whatever works for you. You don’t even have to wear a dress if you don’t want to – if renting a tux is more your speed, then rent a tux. Feeling comfortable and confident in how you look is more important than following trends. 

LIFE CHANGING TIP EVERYONE: mix three tablespoons of honey with one tablespoon of powdered cinnamon, and apply it to your face every day for at least 30 mniutes and then wash it off with warm water. IT WILL GET RID OF YOUR PIMPLES, I’ve only been using it for a week but my face is super clear, soft and nice, I love it. and if you have acne scars, add some lemon juice to the mix and you should be good to go.

how to get into skincare

I’ve already done a post about how to get into makeup, and one about how to get into SFX, so I figured I might as well make one for skincare. I have extremely sensitive, extremely acne-prone skin, so when it comes to skincare products, I’ve literally tried everything. It’s gotten to the point where I’m the “resident expert” that all of my family and friends come to when they need help figuring out which products to use.

I think a lot of people don’t take proper care of their skin because they have the misconception that it’s time-consuming and/or expensive. Honestly, I spend less than two minutes on skincare on most days, and I only use affordable products that are available at drug stores. No matter who you are, you can afford to take good care of your skin.


product names you’re likely to see, and what they mean:

  • cleanser is just soap that’s gentle enough for the delicate skin on your face. It comes in liquid, cream, and even powder formulas, but all you need to know is that if the label says “cleanser,” then it’s just face wash. If you’re only going to use one skincare product, this is the one you should invest in.
  • Note: You should NEVER use bar soap on your face! The skin on your face is thinner and more delicate than the skin on the rest of your body, and most bar soaps will damage it. There are some cleansers that come in bar form, but as a general rule you should never use a product on your face that wasn’t made specifically to be used on faces. 
  • moisturizer is probably the second most commonly-used product, after cleanser. This is exactly what it sounds like – it’s basically lotion that is specially made to be used on your face. No matter what your skin type is, you should be moisturizing daily. (Proper moisturization actually helps cut down on oily skin in most cases.) 
  • toner (sometimes also called astringent) is a product that is usually applied after cleanser, but before moisturizer. It’s called “toner” because it tones your skin, as well as cleansing any dirt or grime that your cleanser missed. Not everyone needs to use toner, but if you have oily or acne-prone skin, I’d recommend it.
  • a face mask is any product that is made to be used occasionally to give your skin a little extra love. A lot of them are made to address certain issues, like acne, dryness, or dullness. Usually, you apply it and let it sit on your face for a few minutes before you wash it off. I personally try to use a mask on my face once or twice a week whenever I have the time, but they’re more of a treat than a necessity. (And you probably shouldn’t use them every day.) 
  • exfoliators or exfoliating scrubs are products designed to buff away dead skin cells. Usually, they have some kind of gritty texture to them (like sugar grains) that scrubs off the dead skin. Like face masks, they’re more of a treat than a necessity, but unlike with face masks, too much exfoliating can actually hurt your skin. You should never exfoliate more than 2-3 times a week, and never, ever exfoliate two days in a row.
  • pore strips are kind of like waxing strips for your face, but instead of removing hair, they remove blackheads and other junk clogging your pores. I would not recommend pore strips to someone who is new to skincare, and like with exfoliators, using them too often can really damage your skin. If you’re going to use them, you should never use them more than once every three days. 

There are other product names that you might see floating around online (like “essence” or “facial oil”), but these are the basic products that you need to know about. Honestly, if you have a good cleanser, toner, and moisturizer (plus maybe a face mask or two for occasional pampering), then you don’t really need any other products, because those three will get the job done. 


how to build your own skincare routine:

  1. The first step is to understand your skin type. The three most common types are: dry, oily, and combination (in between dry and oily). Shop for products that are designed and labelled for your skin type. (If you have a lot of acne, look for products labelled “acne care” or something along those lines. If you have a lot of skin allergies, or if your skin doesn’t react well to harsh chemicals, look for products made for sensitive skin.)
  2. Go to the nearest Walmart, CVS, Walgreen’s, ect. with $20, and find the skincare aisle. Keeping your skin type in mind, look for a good cleanser and a good moisturizer. (If you have oily or acne-prone skin, you might want to pick up a toner as well.) If you can, look for generic brands (I know Walmart carries one called Equate) that make products with the same ingredients as name-brand products, but significantly cheaper. (If you’re looking for cruelty-free products, check out the brands Burt’s Bees and Yes To.)
  3. If you want to make things easier, you can buy all of the products you need in a pack. (Like this, or this.) These usually contain a cleanser, a toner, and a moisturizer. 
  4. Every morning when you first wake up, wash your face with the cleanser and pat it dry with a clean towel. Then apply the toner, if you bought one – you do not wash this off. Then (after waiting a few seconds for the toner to take effect), apply your moisturizer. That’s literally all there is to it. If you’re a morning shower person, you can save time by washing your face in the shower, then applying toner and moisturizer after you get out.
  5. Every night before you go to bed, do the same thing. (Of course, if you wear makeup, you’ll have to remove it, either with makeup remover or with warm water, before you wash your face.) 
  6. Right before bed is a good time to use face masks/exfoliators/pore strips, if you want. I always wash my face first, then skip over my toner and go straight into applying the mask/exfoliator/strip, and let it sit for as long as the directions on the packaging indicate. After I wash it off, I use my moisturizer like always.
  7. Congratulations! You now have a skincare routine!


This post goes into detail of all the products and tricks I use in my own personal routine, if you’re curious. 

I hope this post was helpful! If you have any questions about specific products, or about treating specific skin conditions, feel free to message me and I’ll try to help in any way I can. 

masterlist (there’s more beauty/skincare tips on there, if you’re interested)

How to Prep Your Skin For Foundation

When it comes to foundation, you really need to take the uttermost care when applying it, and that goes for prepping your skin too. Whilst it seems quick, easy and effective to simply slap your foundation on and head out the door, you may find that it moves about during the day and doesn’t look as fresh as possible. It’s SO important to prep your skin properly for foundation and that goes beyond just applying moisturiser.

Cleanse

One of the most common steps people forget in their makeup routine is cleansing their skin, but it is also one of the most important. You don’t necessarily need to do a full deep cleanse using foaming cleansers or cream cleansers, but giving your skin a quick cleanse before applying makeup is something that can really help improve the appearance and application of your makeup as it helps to remove any excess dirts and oils that are in the pores. A gentle micellar water (I recommend Bioderma Sensibio h2o Micellar Water as it is gentle but still effective) After cleansing ensure that you “pat” your skin dry to remove any excess moisture.

Keep reading

I've actually decided that I can hairspray my fringe, which makes it crispy and less soft but it isn’t doing this *flips into his eyes* while I’m trying to talk. So there’s my little beauty tip. Second beauty tip I’ve learnt: If you’ve just had a hair cut or your hair is not working properly  put some dry hair shampoo in your hair before you go to sleep because then your hair releases oils in the night and that’s when the dry hair shampoo can be like “no, I am a barrier!”, so I’ve been doing that. And it’s made my hair look nicer the next day, if I’m having one of those days. “Oh my gosh, beauty tips with Phil #BeautyTips”. I know. Look at me knowing how to use dry hair shampoo. Phil, the hair specialist. Depends on what kind of hair you have. I’ve just got hair that turn into a bit of a greasy rat after about a day, so that helps. *chuckles* Yeah, so that’s my beauty tips. Any other beauty tips? We need some kind of beauty vlog music though for beauty tips. *finds generic royalty free background music* Is this beauty? It sounds like I’m going on a journey with my animals to get to a new circus. So your next beauty tip is, if you have a zit, try putting some toothpaste on it the night before you go to sleep because it dries you out. Also try not to pop the zit because that hurts and it can leave a scar. This should just be the theme tune to my life. I’m just going to play this. *continues to wiggle to the music* Other beauty tips with Phil… I don’t have any other ones… hmm… don’t drop things on your feet because it makes them bruise. It’s getting a bit DanAndPhilCRAFTS now. Protip! … What other beauty tips? Drink lots of water. Stay hydrated. ‘Cause then your skin will have a drink. Don’t be afraid to moisturise. I actually started moisturising quite a lot. Cleanse in the shower, then afterwards your face will be a bit dry so then you moisturise after you’ve done that. Protip! “What moisturiser do you use?” I don’t really have… oh, I got some Clinique for Men. I need to stop this now *turns off music* this is endless. I got some Clinique for Men. Why is it for “men”? I would just have the normal Clinique but I got for Christmas in like one of those Christmas things. Apparently it’s specifically designed for my roughed skin. But that is working quite well. Smells quite nice. … “Gendered skin care is ridiculous.” What I think is ridiculous is how the women’s deodorant is always more expensive than the men’s and it’s exactly the same product. It just smells a bit nicer. I can’t believe that. That's should be changed. If it’s the same product, why is it more expensive to be a girl and need deodorant? Who knows? Why does it even exist?
— 

@amazingphil during his live show on the 8th of June 2017 (x)

Quotes from Phil (3/?)

Meet Phil who dishes out #BeautyTips and bashes gendered beauty products while being utterly adorable. 

3

aloe! i love her 💕 i use aloe every so often, usually when i have deep and inflamed acne because it reduces inflammation a lot. i’ve only ever used fresh aloe and i recommend it 110%! i know it can be difficult to find in many places, but i purchase aloe leaves (is that what they’re called?) from my local mexican supermarket. i just cut slices like the picture and use my fingers to get out the gel and spread it on my face. once it dries it tends to leave white residue, so i only apply it at night. one last thing, fresh aloe does have an unpleasant scent!