beautiful niece

Current mood level: the bat who didn’t stop at one.

I fell in love with my bestfriend.
But he didn’t chase me. He had his doubts about me. Means he is careful about who he lets into his life.
He didn’t whisper sweet nothings to my ears. But he will always answer my phone calls. 
He doesn’t parade our relationship on social media.  I am not his shiny new toy. I am his hidden gem.
He doesn’t put me first. He has his parents, his beautiful nieces and nephew, his siblings, his health, his life.
He wasn’t jealous if I talk to my peers or work with other guys, he lets me grow. He didn’t care that I had 2 million followers. He knows all the 10 real friends I have and their names. 
He can’t remember the title of my songs, but he remembers his niece’s birthday.
He didnt forgo his friends for me. His friends were there for him when he needed them before i came into his life.
He would never immediately agree to my thoughts. He tells me if im wrong. And when im right, he acknowledges it.

All this time I thought love was all about how a man should profess his love, flowers at my door, letters saying he’s in love, enslaving his entire being to me, but here is this person, who just wants to be sure he is the best man that he can be for himself, his family, and the world. And at the end of the day, he tells me all about it. All these things that he does or does not do, for some reason, he wants to share all of them with me. 

And at the end of our every conversation, he lets me know that he loves me too.

I am his best friend. And for that, I am the luckiest girl in the world.


Here I’ll introduce you to my autistic niece, Victoria and how a 6 year old loves Lorna Dane aka Polaris from the X-Men. She loves Lorna and the color of her hair and clothes. She already know very well who is this character. She has a Barbie doll where her mother (my sister) dyed her hair green and bought many green clothes for her doll who she named Lorna.

This video was taken in her grandma’s house who just moved in recently. My cousin was recording while babysitting her and send me this heartwarming video since he knows I love X-Men. My beautiful niece is autistic who is afraid of costumes. She don’t like wearing them for Halloween and she gets scared when she sees people wearing costumes (you know, like creepy costumes lol). I thought this was something big and emotional to me since my niece, who is so young, started to like the X-Men and her favorite is Polaris. Funny how few people out there are pretending not to know Lorna when this 6 year old girl knows who she actually is and where she’s from. Autistic children are smart and that’s what makes them different. Please share and thank you!


‘You kidding Uncle Rau? I could beat Kori without even lifting a finger!’ 

‘Heh; You’re a lot like your mother little one’

random thought: i hate it when family members comment “wow i have such a beautiful granddaughter/niece/daughter/etc” on facebook. and i’m a cis female, so i think to myself…why does this bother me so much?

i think it’s the fact that they never comment or like things any other time. the only time they think to comment is when i’m wearing make up or i look feminine, and it’s solely on my appearance, and how i’m their grand daughter, niece, what have you. it’s as if all that matters is i look good, and when you add “wow, what a beautiful grand daughter”, it makes me feel objectified in this weird, awkward way. like yes, i know i’m your grand daughter, but…why do you need to bring that up every time you see a pretty picture of me?

and why don’t i ever get a comment like that when i post a picture of myself with my partner? the nicest i ever look is when i am going on a date and we take a selfie together, and my family (save for my awesome-ass mom) is completely silent. i could look like a goddess, but they don’t say shit.

how about when i post some really awesome art? you’ll comment on how beautiful i am, but not how beautiful my art is? how talented i am? no? all you want to comment on is how pretty i look. like…thanks. but the way you word it sounds like you’re saying “haha look at me i have good genes look how pretty this thing is.” like literally…fuck off.

i don’t know why this makes me so mad. i literally just explained it and it still doesn’t make sense.



8 Years.

Eight years ago today, the decision was made for me that I would receive treatment for my addiction. It’s wild that I have made it as far as I have in life because there was a time when I didn’t think I would make it to see 18 let alone stay clean. Here I am at the age of 22 alive and well. I have a solid job, friends & family, the keys to my grandparents’ home, my own apartment (even if it is a shitty studio), and I’m allowed to be around my two beautiful nieces who I love and cherish as if they were my own. If you would have told me all of this on March 27th, 2009 right after I walked through the doors of Pathway Family Center and not even a full 24 hours after getting high, I would have told you that you are fucking insane. Not once since then have I drank or used any other substances. Between the deaths of my closest friends and various traumatic experiences before and after getting clean, my life was never all that great until 2016. All of this has been worth it and I’m grateful I never picked back up, no matter what.

It used to be life that scared me and now it is death that terrifies me. I don’t know the time I’ll be punching my ticket so until then, I’m going to keep on living and enjoy all that I see and feel.

First ladies aren’t always presidential spouses. In fact, two early uses of the title refer to the beautiful, popular Harriet Lane, niece of James Buchanan, the only lifelong bachelor president. She was an able hostess who, not long before the Civil War, arranged for Northern and Southern guests to be seated apart at a White House function in order to keep the peace. Harper’s Weekly called her “Our Lady of the White House,” and Frank Leslie’s Illustrated Newspaper captioned Lane’s picture thusly: “The subject of our illustration … may be justly termed the first lady in the land.”

So as we learn that Ivanka Trump, Donald Trump’s older daughter, arranged a meeting between the president-elect and former vice president Al Gore; that she and husband Jared Kushner are reportedly house-hunting in Washington; and that Ivanka is rumored to be looking at White House office space, it’s pretty fair to say she isn’t breaking completely new ground. There’s no job description, so like other first ladies, Ivanka can define her position — and it looks like the gig is hers — in a unique way: advocating for nonpartisan causes, as Laura Bush did with children’s literacy and Michelle Obama did with nutrition, or setting up in the White House’s West Wing as a de facto policy adviser, like Hillary Clinton.

But unlike her predecessors who weren’t the wife of the president, Ivanka appears poised to be an adviser, advocate and hostess all at once. Which could revolutionize the role — and make her the most powerful first lady ever.

Read more here: “Ivanka Trump could be the most powerful first lady ever”