beautiful dagger

How Not to Diplomacy

Ranger: So, what can you offer us in way of payment?

GM: The mayor fiddles in the small chest where he had drawn out the gold, and takes out a beautiful dagger of gleaming bluish metal.

Mayor: If you truly can solve the mystery behind the disappearing ships, then you may have this. It’s a family heirloom… my great-great-grandfather handed this down through the generations. It has a long and storied history-

Samurai: But isn’t there anything better that you can offer us than a measly dagger? 

- awkward silence - 

Mayor: Child, do you know what this is made of? This dagger is pure mithril, one of the rarest metals in existence! It is no mere dagger, it is a priceless artifact. It is worth more-

Samurai: Yeah, but… it’s just a dagger. Can’t you offer anything better?

GM: Are you kidding? Okay, fine. Roll diplomacy.

- samurai rolls a Nat20 -

Mayor: Well, if you solve our shipping problem, the small house in the centre of town with the vegetable garden - my mother’s old house - is yours. That is all I can offer you, lest you take the clothes off my back too.

Ranger (laughing intensely): Wow, real estate! Never had that as a reward before!

The Signs And What They Should Be Treated Like
  • Aries: Like an oasis. Like they are salvation in a territory of blank cruelty. Their kindness and generosity should be shared but protected from those who wish to taint it
  • Taurus: Like a home. They are always someone who is associated with comfort and normality, but they are never to be disrespected or abused— because while they stand tall they could easily come crumbling down, broken.
  • Gemini: Like a classic book. Their length of wisdom and truth is timeless, be careful when dealing with them. One wrong move could stain their pages forever, and tear at their seams. They should be cared for and their stories should be told to everyone.
  • Cancer: Like your old favorite song. They should be remembered and loved by everyone. Just the sound of them should bring joy and nostalgia to people far and near. They have a way of speaking to people- no matter their background.
  • Leo: Like a dagger. Their beauty may be intimidating and seem far away— but close enough their edges are sharp, ready to pierce and defend themselves against all who plan to fight. They are to be sheathed and cared for.
  • Virgo: Like a mug. A mug is used to be filled up with liquids to warm your body and quench your thirst, despite the cracks and dents in it. We often look past the signs to fill our own needs. But if you are not careful the one crack could lead to the entire thing shattering. They should be repaired, and loved for all their imperfections as well as their perfections.
  • Libra: Like a piece of glass. If you hurt them, and are lucky enough to be forgiven, just remember — you have a left a crack on their exterior, and it will always be a reminder to them.
  • Scorpio: Like a fire. Their light should be shielded from the wind— protected and kindled so it can burn brighter and brighter. Their warmth may be soft, but it is not to be taken lightly, because fires can engulf and destroy as well
  • Sagittarius: Like a rare flower. Their beauty may be brilliant, but that doesn't mean they don't need reassurance from time to time that they are incredible and one of a kind.
  • Capricorn: Like the stars. Even though you only see them occasionally, you know they're constantly there and appreciate their presence and guidance. Their light always a constant reminder that darkness doesn't have to be so lonely after all.
  • Aquarius: Like a storm. They may be unpredictable and hasty, but if you battle through the hardships and roughness– you will get to the center. And learn that there's nothing to be afraid of after all.
  • Pisces: Like a pen. They inspire you and help you channel your creativity, but if you mess up, it leaves a mark that can only fade with time. They should not be taken for granted or left behind when they run out of ink— they should be cherished forever, for getting you through a time when you needed a spark of creativity most.
15 days until The Raven King
19 days until A Court of Mist & Fury
19 days until The Rose & Dagger
110 days until The Beauty of Darkness
138 days until A Torch Against the Night