What if, when Petunia Dursley found a little boy on her front doorstep, she took him in? Not into the cupboard under the stairs, not into a twisted childhood of tarnished worth and neglect–what if she took him in?
Petunia was jealous, selfish and vicious. We will not pretend she wasn’t. She looked at that boy on her doorstep and thought about her Dudders, barely a month older than this boy. She looked at his eyes and her stomach turned over and over. (Severus Snape saved Harry’s life for his eyes. Let’s have Petunia save it despite them).
Let’s tell a story where Petunia Dursley found a baby boy on her doorstep and hated his eyes–she hated them. She took him in and fed him and changed him and got him his shots, and she hated his eyes up until the day she looked at the boy and saw her nephew, not her sister’s shadow. When Harry was two and Vernon Dursley bought Dudley a toy car and Harry a fast food meal with a toy with parts he could choke on Petunia packed her things and got a divorce.
Harry grew up small and skinny, with knobbly knees and the unruly hair he got from his father. He got cornered behind the dumpsters and in the restrooms, got blood on the jumpers Petunia had found, half-price, at the hand-me-down store. He was still chosen last for sports. But Dudley got blood on his sweaters, too, the ones Petunia had found at the hand-me-down store, half price, because that was all a single mother working two secretary jobs could afford for her two boys, even with Vernon’s grudging child support.
They beat Harry for being small and they laughed at Dudley for being big, and slow, and dumb. Students jeered at him and teachers called Dudley out in class, smirked over his backwards letters.
Harry helped him with his homework, snapped out razored wit in classrooms when bullies decided to make Dudley the butt of anything; Harry cornered Dudley in their tiny cramped kitchen and called him smart, and clever, and ‘better ‘n all those jerks anyway’ on the days Dudley believed it least.
Dudley walked Harry to school and back, to his advanced classes and past the dumpsters, and grinned, big and slow and not dumb at all, at anyone who tried to mess with them.
But was that how Petunia got the news? Her husband complained about owls and staring cats all day long and in the morning Petunia found a little tyke on her doorsep. This was how the wizarding world chose to give the awful news to Lily Potter’s big sister: a letter, tucked in beside a baby boy with her sister’s eyes.
There were no Potters left. Petunia was the one who had to arrange the funeral. She had them both buried in Godric’s Hollow. Lily had chosen her world and Petunia wouldn’t steal her from it, not even in death. The wizarding world had gotten her sister killed; they could stand in that cold little wizard town and mourn by the old stone.
(Petunia would curl up with a big mug of hot tea and a little bit of vodka, when her boys were safely asleep, and toast her sister’s vanished ghost. Her nephew called her ‘Tune’ not 'Tuney,’ and it only broke her heart some days.
Before Harry was even three, she would look at his green eyes tracking a flight of geese or blinking mischieviously back at her and she would not think 'you have your mother’s eyes.’
A wise old man had left a little boy on her doorstep with her sister’s eyes. Petunia raised a young man who had eyes of his very own).
Petunia snapped and burnt the eggs at breakfast. She worked too hard and knew all the neighbors’ worst secrets. Her bedtime stories didn’t quite teach the morals growing boys ought to learn: be suspicious, be wary; someone is probably out to get you. You owe no one your kindness. Knowledge is power and let no one know you have it. If you get can get away with it, then the rule is probably meant for breaking.
Harry grew up loved. Petunia still ran when the letters came. This was her nephew, and this world, this letter, these eyes, had killed her sister. When Hagrid came and knocked down the door of some poor roadside motel, Petunia stood in front of both her boys, shaking. When Hagrid offered Harry a squashed birthday cake with big, kind, clumsy hands, he reminded Harry more than anything of his cousin.
His aunt was still shaking but Harry, eleven years and eight minutes old, decided that any world that had people like his big cousin in it couldn’t be all bad. “I want to go,” Harry told his aunt and he promised to come home.
The rain fell just loud enough for you to hear, the skies a beautiful but somber grey and the world feeling otherwise silent. The birds weren’t chirping. The neighborhood seemed empty. It was just you. You and your empty apartment and your thoughts. The all consuming thoughts that made the silence seem so loud. His voice just kept replaying in your head, like the soundtrack to the otherwise quiet moment.
💖 sparkle up your heart by doing random acts of kindness to the people you love or even to strangers (if ur comfortable with that)
🐶 pat your doggos, pets, and animals friends for a happy soul! give em extra hugs for optimal results!
🐣 dont chicken out! if u want to do something that makes u happy, just do it! and always remember to do it for yourself
🐚 collect sum cute shells in the beach, fill a smol jar with sand, and chill with ur friends/significant other
🌱 go on a botanical garden adventure! make ur own garden! plant the old seeds u bought from a plant shop, water your little sprouts!
🍵 drink a warm cup of earl grey tea or coffee! spice it up with cinnamon if u want! (i dont like. cinnamon tho but u kno)
🍋 detoxify!! lemon is a good antioxidant! drink a cup of lemonade or do ur mix in ur own way!
🍓 boost ur health (bc it is wealth) by eating and storing a couple of organic fruits for personal consumption
🌻 go buy yourself some sunflowers, daisies, zinnias, crysanthemums in the farmer’s market
🌞 go out, experience the sunny weekdays, enjoy the feel of sun beams during the golden hours, fall in love with the summer feel
🌚 observe the moon, fall in love with the stars, embrace the beauty of the skies and the galaxies
📌 grab the keys and go on a crazy spontaneous adventure !! bring a tad of food for picnic purposes too
🎨 make art, appreciate art, be ur own version of masterpiece. grow up and craft yourself to become ur best version!
🔮 invest in the little things in life. enjoy the smell of rain, the copper brwn color of your trees on autumn, living for the littlest things is (proven to be) magical.
⌚ dont worry too much!! you are not running out of time. you are still young and you have ur life ahead of you.
🎥 film all the beautiful things about your days. do it for achive’s sake. do it for your future self. do it so that u may be able to rewatch it over and over again
🎶 listen to good soothing music while taking a shower, nap, or walking on parks!!
💌 write your future self a letter that talks about your aspirations and dreams and a little description about ur present self
📖 read your favorite books under the genre feel-good! reread if u want to feel the lingering joy inside ur chest again!
💭 talk to your friends, colleagues, best buds etc! it is never okay to bottle up the sadness!!
🔎 research cute places you’ve never been to and visit them alone, with your significant other, or with your best pals! google is ur adventure bestfriend!
✨ dont forget to sparkle up! ur shinier than the glitters!
💤 get some sleep to recharge for a brighter tomorrow! oversleeping may sometimes be bad for u tho
✋ give yourself a high five for surviving today and yesterday! im proud of u!
📯 learn a new instrument and compose a cute song for your friend!
“Don’t say that you love me more than I love you. Trust me, you are the glorious sun to me, my everything and I love you with all my heart.”
“Repeat after me; I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy…and believe it, ‘cause you are.”
“Darling, perfect is just a word. Perfection is impossible and chasing after it will lead you nowhere. Just do your best and accept that the result is good.”
“When the most broken put themselves back together, they become the most beautiful angels. It’s okay if it’s sloppy or if a crack is still left open, you’re even more ethereal to me.”
“The longest and most difficult roads in life end in the best places. Be patient and keep going.”
“So what if the world is complex and overwhelming? So what if you can’t do it all, can’t be the best? Stop focusing on your image and focus on yourself. You have these years on this earth, enjoy them, don’t overthink it. “
“I’m love with your mind, soul and body.”
“The best thing you can do in life is to love yourself and let your passion help others to love themselves too.”
“I know you may feel alone right now but just remember how big the world is. How many souls will love you for who you are. They’re out there, don’t worry. Just get through, explore and you’ll find them. Just don’t forget to find yourself.”
“Can I kiss where it hurts?”
“Hey, it’s going to be fine. We’ll get through this together, hand in hand, okay?”
“It’s all about the little things. Your favorite tea, good stories, sparkly eyes, beautiful skies, the thrill of adventure, passion, the feeling of home. Enjoy them.”
“You’re not broken. Your mind is just built differently, get to know it, have a little chat with yourself. The most complicated minds tend to be the most beautiful ones, just don’t let it use you, learn to cooperate with it.”
“Hey, beautiful, you okay?”
“You’re amazing, did you know that?”
“I think I’m going blind from your beauty.”
“Everyone’s different. Everyone’s beautiful. You’re the most beautiful human I’ve met, and I’ve met myself!”
“Breathe, darling, breathe.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know that triggered you, I’ll never do it again.”
“Here, I’m going to make you some tea and we’ll watch a movie, that sound good?”
Magic is real. It’s not spells and cauldrons, no… it’s more subtle. Like, when the air seems electrified, when eyes speak more than words, when you sense something none of your normal senses detect. If you stop for a moment and look beyond, you’ll find it.“
“I know you don’t want to, but in the end, it’ll pay off. Just breathe, keep your head up and you’ll be fine.”
O beautiful for spacious skies, For amber waves of grain, For purple mountain majesties Above the fruited plain! America! America! God shed His grace on thee, And crown thy good with brotherhood -and sisterhood From sea to shining sea!