Hey guys, sorry to be that person but I’m not going to be able to do anything for the advent calendar today. It’s been a super busy day and right now I really just need to go to sleep. I’m super sorry please don’t hate me :(
The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.
So, turns out my coven can’t get together this equinox, and I really fancy doing something.
Not necessarily “magic”, but something. So here are a few ideas for other fellas who would like to celebrate the equinox, but are on their own and have no ideas!
- decorate around, or make an altar, with autumn related stuff (go collect fallen leaves, go to your local farmer’s market and get some seasonal products, learn how to pick a yummy pumpkin) - light all the candles in your house and meditate on the dancing flame - try guided meditation or some binaural beats to astral travel and chat with your astral familiar, they need visits and care sometimes, not only going on quests and work - open your circle, do whatever it is you do every time (call the elements? call some divinities? do that) and just be there, offering some food you made and thanking the Earth - maybe some divination - put on some “fall-ish” music and dance to that - clean up your house and then cleanse it, guarding it against the cold months - write on your grimoire (I’m writing down my Natal Chart) - make blessed pumpkin pie spice (get cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, cloves, allspice, research their properties, grind them together, maybe clockwise and chanting or something, to remind you about the nice things of autumn, the bounty of harvest season, and sprinkle it whenever you feel like :) - do some yoga: balance, equinox = things in balance - make a fall playlist and use it as an offering, dance and use that dance as an offering, or a painting, or whatever “artistic” - bundle up and watch your favourite fall movies - brew and enchant some tea - knit a scarf and use it for knot magic (where the knots stand for warmth, protection, friendlyness, abundance, health, wealth) and choose the colours of the threads accordingly - make a moodboard inspired by Persephone and her myth - collect some leaves, write on them things you want to let go, then get somewhere high and scatter the leaves to the wind, let them get lost and rot, and so will your worries - reflect on what has been, what you’ve gained, what you’ve lost, what you’ve learned, maybe write this down in your grimoire or witch diary
If you have any other ideas, feel free to add them :)
Okay, Time after Time is pretty unintentionally hilarious and goofy but in an entertaining way (and everyone is really attractive) but the MOST unrealistic thing, beating out Jack the Ripper traveling to 2017 in H.G. Wells’ time machine, the one H.G. apparently built by himself, and Ripper having very little culture shock and adjusting to being a modern day serial killer easily, is the fact that
he took a hotpocket straight out of the microwave and bit into it eminently and didn’t instantly die from his mouth being burned alive
Warnings: slight smut, dirty content, cursing (no sex but allusions to it)
I stared at her dancing to some rock song and knew my pants would soon become too tight in certain reasons. I was hooked.
She moved her hips in tune to the provocative beat and her hands traveled far down south before nearly going where I wanted mine to go when she pulled up.
Her face, that’s what drew everyone in. Her eyes closed and her lips parted slightly yet I all I could see was her innocence radiating off her. The beat began to speed up and her whole body began to vibrate with it and I finally decided enough was enough.
“Get her for me would ya?” I ask with a smile toward my nearest worker. They follow my gaze before hurrying over to her. She looks at me winks, and continues to dance.
The man comes back shaking. “She said after this song Mr. J.” He can’t even look at me. Pussy.
I grin lazily at the man and bring my hand up to my lips showing off the tattoo before laughing. “She’s so good.” I grin at the man keeping my hand there to scare him some more. Fucking pussy. His hands begin to shake and I laugh longer this time before standing up. I stalk over to him and circle him slowly running my hand across his chest as I pass. “Ya scared? Scared of the evil Clown of Gotham pretty boy?” He doesn’t answer and I slowly get mad. As I walk past his face I grab his jaw quickly. I pull the man’s face close to mine. “Answer me…pussy.”
“No Mr. J.” He replies quickly.
I drop the grip on his jaw and pat his face before running my hand back to his hair. “Liar and a pussy. I can smell the fear on you pussy. Either admit to it and I shoot you or get her the fuck over here.”
He runs away as fast as possible and I drop myself back onto the couch seat and spread my legs out across it. A perfect place to watch this exchange.
She leans down and bites her lips before facing her ass right towards my eyesight. “Fucking perfect.” I mumble dragging my hands down my jaw. The man is shaking and she caresses his hair before kissing his cheek. As she straightens up he visibly relaxes at what she says next. The man then follows her back over to me.
“You wanted me Mr. J?” She asks with a smile now not even three feet from me.
“Sit down doll,” I pat my lap and she grins wickedly before sitting right on my crotch. The pussy is standing in the corner scared. “You can leave before I change my mind about killing you.” My left hand wraps around her waist as my right hand makes a gun. I squint my eyes and point my ‘gun’ at him. “BANG!” I yell shooting the gun and he jumps. “Want me to try with a real one? Or you gonna leave you pussy?” He leaves without a second thought.
“My name,” she says softly by my ear her hips grinding into my crotch, “do you want to know?” My hand squeezes her hips as my right hand pushes her hair away from the tattoo on her neck. I pull her neck to the side before running my tongue across the inked skin. She moans and I begin to suck in response.
“It’s a game sweet cheeks. Not knowing adds to the lust for me. I’m horny as fuck and want you.” I move my lips down to her collarbone and she wraps her fingers into my hair.
“Then take me.” She murmurs her lips sucking on my earlobe.
“God your so perfect. Sorry doll, I have to yell at a guy for screwing up a million dollar deal.” I begin to pull away slowly and my hands run up and down her sides.
“Let me stay and afterwards I can show you,” her hand grabs my crotch as she pulls away. She rubs it slowly as she talks, “All of you a good time.”
I growl at her before quickly kissing her. I grab her sides causing her mouth to open and I dive in trying to learn everything about the inside of that sexy little mouth. She pulls away first causing my to growl but she just grins and begins to unbutton my shirt. After each button she adds a long hot open mouth kiss and I lift my hips up. She looks up from halfway down my chest before deciding to wrap her legs around my waist and pull me close. “Don’t stop baby doll.” She giggles and her tongue licks back up everything she’s kissed.
“Mr. J.” A voice interrupts and she pulls away slowly before buttoning my shirt back up not looking at who was there. “He’s here.”
I growl at the interrupter before pulling the gun out from behind my back and shooting him in the head. “Bang!” I say halfheartedly pissed about being left dry down beneath.
“Don’t worry J, I’m not letting you go before I taste that dick of yours.” She tells me before laying down on top of me.
“Doll, I’m not letting you leave till I taste you and my dick gets slammed into every single one of your holes.” I reply before motioning the man in.
“She’s new.” Matt? No…Mark? No…Mike! Fucking Mike. “Hi hot little thing I’m David.” Oh, well he’s dead. David was the one who got my favorite club found by Batman.
“Fuck off Douche, you ruined my time with her.” I reply my hand stroking her breasts.
He holds his hands up in surrender. “Apologies J, I will make sure your alone next time. You were the one that wanted to see me.”
“Your attractive.” She says with a smile, her fingers playing with my tie as her legs tangle into mine. I laugh at that.
“Maybe I won’t kill you after all! If she likes you I mean. But you did lead Batman to my favorite club…” I kiss her hair and begin to untangle myself from her. She lets go willingly and I stand up.
“Look, J, man, total accident and wasn’t really my fault.” David begins to back away slowly from me.
“You were looking after the club for one day and that same day Batman comes to town and finds my club.” I grab a knife from the table nearby and flip it between my fingers. “Yet somehow that isn’t your fault?” I begin to laugh. David grins nervously and I quickly throw the knife at his dick and hit right on the mark.
He screams and I run over and cover his mouth. “Shh, shh.” I press my fingers to his lips. “If you make a scene I’m gonna have to murder you.” Tears begin to leak down and I groan. I walk away before whirling around and pulling a gun out and pressing it to his forehead. “Kidding! HA HA HA! I’m gonna kill you anyways.” I pull the trigger and his blood splatters on me and the wall.
“Come her puddin’,”She says as his body slumps down to the ground. Her legs are in the air and her stomach pressed against the couch. Her legs were wide open and inviting. I walk over and she leans up onto her knees and begins to unfasten my belt. I stroke her hair as she unfastens the zipper. Her fingers dance around my boxers and she smiles up at me. “(Y/N), that’s my name.” She tells me before swallowing me whole.