the signs as things i’ve heard my public school teachers say
  • aries: you're korean? my wife's korean! do you like kimchi?
  • taurus: we should have a tri-president system where america has three presidents
  • gemini: cows aren't edible in china?
  • cancer: in the hispanic world, farting is like pooping on the floor
  • leo: i always confuse india and africa, but then i remember that india's the one with the pointy thing at the end.
  • virgo: i didn't have enough wine to grade all your tests
  • libra: *animal noises*
  • scorpio: looking at this brown fruit, does it turn you off?
  • sagittarius: they call me [name that doesn't rhyme with vagina] because it rhymes with vagina.
  • capricorn: fat is more fattening.
  • aquarius: i am NOT a feminist. i am a heterosexual.
  • pisces: here's a picture of me and my friends smoking hookah