i wanna talk about daydreams for a sec, because i absolutely live in mine. my entire life i’ve been so enthralled by the worlds in my own mind, that at times i prefer to be left alone with them. even as a kid i loved playing by myself, being a spy or a mermaid or something, and playing alone meant i never had to explain my intricate fantasy to anyone else.
i’m 24 tomorrow and i have to wonder if i’ll someday be lying next to my spouse and still playing out fantasies in my head. will i be driving my kids to school and spacing out about what if i were an FBI agent?? what if i were the avatar? what if i were a famous celebrity? it’s weird to think about bc my life right now is so empty, and i’m fully aware that my daydreams fill the void, and as as a kid it was just all about fun. but if/when i do have friends/a spouse/children/fulfilling career, will my want for daydreams simply dissipate? is it really just a coping mechanism, or will i always be living half in reality and half in imagination?
i hope i never lose it tbh. it’s hard to imagine my mind without it, what would I think about in the car? in the shower? in bed? god only knows. but i will say that i hope parts of my reality someday become as good (or almost as good) as my daydreams. it would be nice to have that particular brand of happiness be a permanent thing.
you’re an orchid petal floating in the lake of the universe,
constellations strewn over the surface of your skin,
i can see fireflies gleaming in the dark rivers of your hair
you’re a deity, a masterpiece,
you’re on the tip of every muse’s tongue
stars should be so lucky
to be strung around your neck.
your heart is made of galaxies and liquid gold (happy birthday osh!!)
Tomorrow: HOME! Really looking forward to it actually, which is good. Nothing’s more heart breaking than leave a place you wouldn’t want to leave, so looking forward to get back home as much as looking forward to get to Japan again is super wonderful :3