bbybrat

should have done this

should have done that

constantly finding yourself stuck in the past,

wondering what would have been, if you took the other path.

guess this is why most believe everything is meant to be

most can’t handle living, while killing themselves as a result of over thinking.

You were all I ever wanted from the first days I met you. You always want what you can not have, and back then that was completely our situation. You had this interesting, yet shy spark in your personality I had never seen in a person prior to meeting you. Secretly, I desired you more than anything in this world. I did not necessarily want you to be mine, but I dreamed one day you would be more than just my “friends boyfriend”. I constantly remind myself how funny the way life works is. You are mine now, something I could have never imagined becoming a reality. The first days we spent alone together were indescribable and life changing. We made a connection I have yet to have experienced with another human being. Although we knew each other for a few years at this point, it turned out we knew completely nothing about each other, and the people we were. I know you now, sometimes I think better than you know yourself; as you also feel about me. You are mine now, and I think to myself that I am glad life works out in funny ways. You are mine now and all I ever want to do is to hug you and hold you. All I want is to be held by you constantly to grasp on to this blissful feeling of love.  

Reading through old posts on my past blogs gives me an uneasy feeling.

My body and spirit were completely engulfed in a darkness I’ve now been set free of 

You’re leaving my side for the day  so you tuck me in really tight; the blankets are warm and I’m protected from the cold. I feel loved, I feel safe. These are genuine emotions and although they aren’t everlasting they are my favorite.