Dick once accidentally sucked up Tim’s iPad charger with the vacuum.
Damian once intentionally attacked Tim with the vacuum. They ended up having to cut his hair just to set him loose and Tim was not happy.
When told to clean his room, Jason would, without fail, stuff everything into the closet and drawers… only to be busted by Alfred.
Cass tends to do the same thing at her place, but more because she genuinely thinks she’s cleaning? Alfred is appalled when he opens a closet door and Literally Everything pours out.
Damian and Tim once had a “Windex fight”.
Dick is really bad for not pointing the nozzle in the right direction when dusting or cleaning, and has sprayed himself in the eye many, many times.
Jason once mopped the kitchen and forgot to tell anyone… so Bruce came back from patrol and slipped, falling face-down on the floor. When confronted, Jason shrugged and said that if Bruce had let him go on patrol “this wouldn’t have been a problem”.
There is an ongoing competition to see who can scare Damian while he’s cleaning and wearing his headphones the most. Dick is currently winning with 7 confirmed scares.
Eight-year-old Dick being made to do the occasional chore (at the behest of Bruce, “to teach him the values of diligence and hard work”) and singing “It’s The Hard-knock Life” from Annie just to piss of Alfred and Bruce. It works.
Dick fell out of a window once when he was cleaning one of the top floor windows. Tried to do it again because he claimed it was “good practice”.
Steph is forbidden from cleaning or touching anything in Wayne Manor after breaking a rare, antique vase that cost $1.2 million. She’s allowed to sit on the couch though.
Babs definitely stress cleans. Like, everything in sight. Don’t leave your stuff out when Babs gets really stressed because she will probably throw it away.
Dick dances and sings while he cleans, which means it takes him much longer and gets on everyone’s nerves because it’s usually cheesy pop or 80′s tunes.
Bruce once took it upon himself to clean his own shower and Alfred found him laying on the bathroom floor, barely conscious, a strong fume permeating the room:
Alfred: *coughing through the fumes* Master Bruce! What on earth is— is that fear toxin?! Laughing gas?
Bruce: No… *weakly points to a spray container* I used too much… Cillit Bang….
Alfred: *slowly stands and leaves the room without another word*
I mean disagree if you must I don’t really care aha. I’ll try to add more when I think of them, just wanted to get this out since I said I would write a list. I got lazy on why I think these things and kinda had a moment where I went “wait why am I even explaining myself. I don’t give that much of a fuck to explain myself.” so yeah. Enjoy.
1)Sherlock Holmes – Why you ask? Because Sherlock is just
too cynical to be from any other house. A lot of people think he’s a ravenclaw
(which he could be!) but nah I don’t believe so. Sure Sherlock is smart AF but
he’s not like other smart people. He’s cunning and clever and just so Slytherin
it hurts. (SIDENOTE*** I do believe that brave John Watson is in fact a
Gryffindor. But he’s more like “aye that’s my favorite Gryffindor, John!” than “Ew
Gryffindors” ya feel?)
2)Kayne West- Do I really gotta go over this? Sorta obvious.
3)Jim Halpert-100% Slytherin. Well maybe 98% but close
enough. His constant pranks on Dwight (who is arguably a Gryffindor) is just so
… Slytherin? Aha sorry but I don’t even have the patience to argue this, it’s
set in stone in my mind.
4)Doctor Gregory House-This is another one of those that
doesn’t need explanation.
5)Mare Barrow (Red Queen Series)- I don’t know what it is
about her… But Mare just reminds me of a Slytherin. Just something about her is
so badass ya feel me?
6)Robert Downey Jr.- I’m not sure if I have to explain this
one because come on :’)
7)Ariana Grande- Not a big fan of her, but she’s just very
like mean girl Slytherin (even though I know she’s probably a very sweet girl,
just like the way she looks makes me think of like a mean girl lmao)
8)Hugh Jackman- Totally. Couldn’t see him in any other
11)Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier- There is just something
about him that is so Slytherin (you could probably argue Gryffindor as well…
12)Jyn Erso- I’m a multi fandom nerd and I 100% am so for
this. Jyn is such a strong lead character that takes no shit.
13)Princess Leia- Completely and totally a Slytherin.
14)Zuko (Avatar the Last Airbender)- I know this doesn’t
help the whole “villains are not Slytherin!!” but like he gets a redemption at
the end (sort of last season). So to me he’s like a good mix of “bad” and “good”
15)Lestat De Lioncourt (The Vampire Chronicles)- He’s a mess
and that’s amazing. Also he’s kind of the stupid (he’s not stupid I know but he’s
just like… a dumb blond which I find hilarious) mean Slytherin.
16)Louis Tomlinson- Louis William Tomlinson is for sure a
Slytherin. He’s just like the popular outgoing kind of Slytherin (they exist
lmao), but he can just be so savage/sassy.
17)Anne Boleyn- Fucking queen (literally and just as an
adjective) as fuck. She’s especially boss and Slytherin-y in The Tudors.