batman suit up

I’m debuting my new blog with a headcanon

  • look ok the Waynes don’t go to normal banks
  • what are they, poor?
  • but Jason does because he doesn’t have access to their money
  • I mean he is fucking dead
  • and fuck if he’s letting them give him any money
  • so Jason is in line at the bank
  • he looks like a normal guy, if a bit muscular
  • he goes by the name Todd Peters
  • bc he has a sense of humor gdi
  • and some guys in masks run in and shoot at the ceiling
  • they order everybody around
  • and the civilians “cower”
    • none of them are actually all that scared
    • they’re used to this ok
    • they deal with Scarecrow every other week ok they’re fine
    • they just figure this is easier than making a fuss
    • Jason’s pretty sure there’s only one bullet in that gun anyway
  • they start demanding the money
  • and Jason can’t just leave this bc he’s here
  • he might as well deal with it
  • so he stands and brings attention to himself
  • “hey!” he yells
  • they turn to him
  • and he just
  • he just fucking decks the closest one in the face
  • it’s a surprise bc nobody usually tries
  • he’s outnumbers like five to one
  • but he ducks their attacks and kicks their feet out from under them
  • and punches them all and basically just leaves them all black and blue
  • he ties them all up when he’s finished
    • bc of course he has fucking rope with him
    • why wouldn’t he
    • that’s a normal thing to have
    • (no it isn’t Jason what the fuck)
  • he couldn’t help but notice that as this was all happening
  • the civilians just quietly started making their withdrawals
  • the people at the desks thank him when they realized he was done
  • one person calls the cops
  • and then Jason realizes that there’s a camera in the bank
  • and he just makes his withdrawal and fucking books it
  • no doubt the bats will be seeing this footage soon
  • and he’s not about to deal with the police
  • he hides in a safehouse for a while in hopes that they don’t call
    • they do
    • bruce thanks him for leaving them alive
    • he doesn’t respond
  • *221B*
  • Sherlock: *sitting in his chair*
  • Rosamund: *sitting in his lap; frowning at a photo* What am I looking at, Uncle Sherlock?
  • Sherlock: *smiles* My baby *points* that's the head, see?
  • Rosamund: *fascinated* Wooow...all those squiggly lines are a person?
  • Sherlock: *chuckles* Yes.
  • Rosamund: Your person.
  • Sherlock: *nods* Yup. And your Aunt Molly's.
  • Rosamund: *giggles* It's funny.
  • Sherlock: Hmm?
  • Rosamund: *still laughing* Aunt Molly has a person in her. How did you put it there?
  • Sherlock: *snorts* Oh, no *lifts her and stands* I'm not having that conversation for another twenty five years.
  • Molly: *enters; grinning* Hello.
  • Rosamund: *happily* Aunt Molly! *runs over; hugs her, whispers* hello, little person.
  • Molly: *smiles* You told her, then?
  • Sherlock: *nods* Oh, yes *pats Rosie's head* you're going to be a godcousin, aren't you?
  • Rosamund: *excited* Uh-huh.
  • Molly: *giggles* Is that so?
  • Sherlock: *nudges Rosie* Pyjamas, young lady. I'll be in soon.
  • Rosamund: *sighs* Okay, Uncle Sherlock. Night Aunt, Molly. Night, little person *runs off*
  • Molly: *calls* Night, Rosie *hugs Sherlock* I'm glad she took it well.
  • Sherlock: *kisses the top of her head* Mmm *pauses* John has some questions to answer, though.
Lego Batjokes Prompt #100 ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽŠ๐Ÿ˜„

“Joker, the point of tuxedo dress-up party is to change into DIFFERENT tuxedos.”

“I am.”

“No, you’ve literally come out over and over in the same purple jacket and pants you wear all the time.”

“What!? Are you blind!? They were all completely different. That last one was violet and this one is obviously plum.”

6

[…]Invest in Gotham. Treat its people like family, watch over them, and use this money to safeguard them from forces beyond their control. My deepest regret is I will not see you grow into the good man I know you will become. And finally, my son… I ask that you never abandon this city to fate. We have lived through dark days, and no doubt there are more to come. But it is the good and great men who stand up for Gotham when others turn and run… In death, I will love you forever.

http://everydaycarry.com/posts/6014/Automatic-Essentials?utm_source=tumblr&utm_medium=tumblr&utm_campaign=tumblr Submitted by Jorge Cabrera

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Compulsively check 14 things stuffed in my pockets before walking out every morning- that if you were to shoot it with close-ups and smash cuts, it would look like George Clooney’s Batman suiting up scene (nipples included).