batman ll

everyone’s expectations about the possible damian wayne video game: finally! a new take on batman! we’ll get to see what it’s like to have damian grown up and in the cowl! this could be a major turning point for the batman franchise!!

reality: here are 7 side quests, all of them are about backtalking to each family member. main campaign includes collecting every stray in a 1000 mile radius. you finish the game when you turn 17 and tim drake self-combusts as a direct aftermath of the curse DC imposed on him at the beginning of time with the Adult Not Even Once spell. congratulations. you outaged him. credits

Headcanon: Ask teenaged Damian about Batman Inc. and Brucie Wayne’s relationship with Batman and you’ll always receive a different answer.

Example:

“What is your father’s relationship with Batman?“
"They’re lovers.”
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“Unrequited love. Father adores him, but Batman has only one passion: JUSTICE.“
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"Childhood friends. Met at summer camp. My father stumbled into the woods and noticed a rather fat bat in the tree. Back then he was a little overweight, and also known as Batboy.”
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“I am here to deliver the truth, and the truth shall set this city free. X-Men are real. He’s a mutant! They’re all mutants!”
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“Total weebs. They were really into Inuyasha in high school. You know that one episode with the bat demons? Huge inspiration.”
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“My father cares a great deal about animals, as I’m sure you are aware. Batman is half bat. That’s why he covers his face. He has bat eyes.“
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"It’s a torrid affair. Batman’s secret headquarters are under Gotham harbor. My father has always had a thing about romance surrounded by fish. Sometimes he’ll get Batman to sing sea shanties.”

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“Here’s the thing: Batman is actually not a man. The figure is made up of small cobbler elves. That’s why the Kevlar fits so tight.”

I want you to think about your favorite fandom. Whichever thing you’re enthusiastic about dedicating your brainspace to, because you find it fun to think about.

Have you picked a fandom yet?

You have? Great. Now let me tell you about mine.

My fandom is Batman. I spend my free time tracking boring news stories, on purpose, if they’re about Batman. I dedicate my long-term memory to obscure historical information, if it’s about Batman. I dress strangely in public to express my enthusiasm about Batman. I’ll even dedicate myself to arguing with the entire world if I think it can change the direction we’re going as a society … Batman-wise.

Thanks for reading that paragraph. Now: Please reread that paragraph, and mentally replace the word “Batman” with “democracy.”

Have you reread it that way yet?

You have? Great. Please remember that paragraph. We all need to reach a point where that paragraph describes us. We need to know about what’s happening in our government, and vote accordingly. Because regardless of who got elected President this year, this election was a flat-out disaster for democracy. And its biggest disasters reflect our collective disinterest in anything that’s not a big, flashy Presidential race.

Want proof? Here’s the three things that went wrongest in the Election of 2016 … and just a heads up: I’m going to unleash just an absolutely obscene amount of links.

3 Non-Trump Reasons This Election Was A Disaster

3

“‘We’ll all take turns as den mothers!’ Batman said. ‘It’ll be fun!’ Batman said.” –Black Canary, done with all her colleagues and these crazy little punks.

Based off of this fantastic text post by incorrectyjquotes. I’ve been giggling about it for a couple days…

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First sound of Jenny Slate’s Lego!Harley’s voice and… it’s definitely one of the friendlier Joker/Harley exchanges I’ve seen, even if it’s just two lines. Still, the film seems to be shaping up to be about how Batman has no friends besides Alfred, so Harley and the Joker in this version being on good terms emphasises how lonely Batman is. Or something.

In other Harley Quinn news, Gotham executive producer John Stevens has said that Harley may appear in the show around episode 22 (the third season finale). Which raises a lot of questions. Sure, Bruce is slowly progressing up the skill-tree he needs to become Batman, but the rate this show is going he’ll become Batman before he’s even graduated highschool.

The show seems to have jumped the rails in regards to showing us the origins of certain Batman-related characters and is just straight up having them appear… Several years before Batman actually shows up. Y’know, like how in Smallville they had Zatanna, Darkseid and Bart Allen show up years before Clark even began superheroing full-time.

i’ll fight you for batman. i’ll fight 20 men. i’ll fight for his no-kill rule. i’ll fight for his part-timing with the justice league. i’ll fight for how hard he tries to rehabilitate the gotham rogues. i’ll fight for his kids and how much he loves them. i’ll fight for the good he does through wayne enterprises. i’ll fight you about his dedication to prefixing the word bat onto any object that could be remotely bat-shaped. i am, if you will, a batstan

some highschool patrochilles headcanons I think of in my spare time
  • achilles absolutely loves neck kissing this is a fact. Patroclus would be prepping for a final and achilles would make it his life’s mission to distract him by kissing him neck to collar
  • patroclus asks the teacher if he could go for a bathroom break but as soon as he’s out achilles follows and they makeout in the empty hallways against the lockers
  • achilles getting bored in class and absentmindedly doodling hearts on patroclus’ arm who’s trying really hard to concentrate
  • everyone knows, if one of them is absent from class, the other wont be there too.
  • achilles is always passing notes to patroclus, one time the teacher catches him and reads the note infront of the whole class 
  • the notes are usually along the lines of “forget about spiderman, superman, and batman……I’ll be ur man ;))”    “Hershey’s makes millions of kisses a day……all im asking is one from u”
  • achilles and patroclus go bowling on friday’s and achilles takes  every opportunity he gets to touch patroclus like “no no you’re holding it a bit to your right let me align my wHOLE body behind you and grab your waist to show you how”
  • patroclus is good at bowling but he plays along
  • achilles takes screenshots of every snap in patroclus’ snapchat story
  • they’re just so in love
  • im okay

acebeatriz  asked:

Are you going to see Lego Batman?

the trailer where batman and robin are in the car and batman’s like “LIFE DOESN’T HAVE SEATBELTS” and then robin hurts himself when the car slams to a stop and batman’s like “I’LL HAVE ALFRED INSTALL SEATBELTS AS SOON AS WE GET BACK” has got my hopes up that this is a sarcastic critique of both pop culture batman and actual batman

i mean, i might not give it my money, but i’ll at least be watching it illegally at some point

The Day The Aliens Came (Hawaiian Feeling)
  • The Day The Aliens Came (Hawaiian Feeling)
  • The Mountain Goats
  • Come, Come To The Sunset Tree
Play

“This was on the vinyl edition of ”The Sunset Tree”…It’s a song about how sometimes you find yourself living in a house and you think ‘I have to get out of here’, but maybe you’re too young to get out of there, or you don’t have any money, or you don’t have any means or anywhere to go, and yet, you cling firmly to the idea that someday you will escape through some means, maybe Batman will show up in his car outside or something, and other people might laugh and say ‘Man, John, Batman’s not coming to save you’, and you think ‘Look, man, between me and Batman and you, I’ll take Batman’.” – JD, Denver, 2010/06/15

Oh, also..

Today I dreamt of a new Gotham Villain

His name is (the) Jackpot and he is casino themed

He liked to wear leds and shiny stuff on his clothes and has a small speaker that uses “Ding-Ching-Ka-ching” and “dooloolooloop” noises.

He is p violent when angry, but is usually very laid back, almost playful. He carefully plans every move he makes, but he is not perfect.
He is p full of himself and likes to smoke and drink.

He likes all casino games but his favs are Slot Machines and BlackJack

Some of his interactions would be…

Batman: Someday, I’ll get you, Jackpot
JP: Ahahah, you never learn, do you, Batman?
JP: No one, ever. Gets the Jackpot.
JP: At much, they get a consolation price. *Slot Machine Noises*

Batman: This… must be the work of a man corrupted by greed…
JP: *Appears with Flashing lights and slot machine noises* JACKPOT!

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I’ll be voicing Talon in DCAbridgedUniverse’s Court of Owls Abridged.

Five little Robins went out one day, over the skyline and far away.
Daddy Bats said “Justice is served!”
But only four little Robins came back.

Repeat x4

Daddy Bats went out out one day, over the skyline and far away.
Daddy Bats said “I swear if you don’t get back here this instant you will all be banned from patrol indefinitely.”
And all of the little Robin’s came back.