bathroom conduct

So apparently people like klaine!mpreg

Here is some for you.

Title: It’s Not Food Poisoning
Author: misskaterinab
Rating: T (mostly for potty mouth)
Word count: ~4300

Summary: Blaine has severe stomach pains and blames it on bad street vendor food. But the street vendor is innocent. An “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant” story. Mpreg.

The loft was never quite quiet at night. The downstairs tenants were night owls and liked to watch old Game Show Network shows on repeat, screaming the answers to questions answered long ago many times over. The people in the building opposite them were a couple who probably should’ve broken up years ago; they had an affinity for conducting their knock-down, drag out fights in front of their open bedroom window, which was definitely nowhere near far enough from Kurt and Blaine’s “bedroom” window, especially when you figured the woman’s extremely shrill voice into the equation.

But on a hot summer night in the middle of July, the main source of the nightly cacophony was centered in the tastefully decorated apartment of Blaine Anderson and Kurt Hummel. The place was nearly empty - Kurt had flown to his hometown of Lima, Ohio, three days before to pay a visit to his father and stepmother. It was the anniversary of his brother’s passing and Kurt felt the need to be near his family. Finances being what they were, the pair could only afford to purchase one plane ticket and Blaine stayed at home to hold down the fort. 

“Fuck, I should’ve never eaten that sausage from that street vendor,” Blaine moaned to himself. He lay on his side in bed, curled up into the fetal position, and clutched his stomach, praying for the shooting pain in his stomach to subside. “I thought it smelled a little funny.”

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