#6: Is there a reason you’re naked on my bed? || requested by @blogitsmargi
A/N: Okay, let’s just imagine that Kylo Ren is a shit head who uses his mind reading to an advantage to get reader flustered because, come on, he’s a dick like that. Thanks for the request, if you’d like, send me a number from this list! [gif not mine, let’s imagine he’s not in the bath]
Word Count: 1.6K+
Warning: Mention of nudity? But not in a detailed way…so…
There wasn’t a single day that Starkiller Base wasn’t busy, from finding the BB unit to dealing with the Resistance; there wasn’t a minute, nor second, where members of the First Order could take a moment to relax. It was blasphemy for a First Order affiliate to take sometime for themselves, so it was quite odd that the commander–Kylo Ren–had been missing for most of the day.
Birthday:October 6. put it in your diary but DON’T WORRY, I will “subtly” mention it nearer the time
Relationship status: bitterly still married because we have children and own property together? also i would def. still bang him, so.
Zodiac Sign: Libra
Favorite Color: when my children ask i say green, so green i guess because it’s important to tell the truth to children.
Pets: we used to have lizards. they smelled, the insects they ate infested the flat, and then they died.
Love or Lust: you know how estate agents say, location, location, location? i say context, context, context because honestly lust can get you a long way.
Cats or Dogs: cats, but have we all seen that post where oscar isaac doesn’t like cats? his cat-bite suffering and subsequent much repeated dislike made me happy for like 72 hours so I’m prepared to disagree on this point.
Coke or Pepsi: put whisky in it and i don’t care
Day or Night: i want to be the sort of person who says night, but 1) night in Malaga means leaving the house at midnight and I just don’t have that kind of stamina any more, and 2) I don’t like getting out of bed but i have come to appreciate the start-over sense of promise that comes with the first coffee of the morning when you haven’t fucked the day up yet and anything is possible.
Calls or Texts: are you my mother? then never call me.
Makeup or Natural?: MAKEUP OH MY GOD. my ability to apply liquid eyeliner in the most horrific workplace toilets should go on my CV
Met a Celebrity: my mum introduced me and my best friend to David Attenborough once, but then at the critical moment where you typically introduce the other person she went blank on whether he was David or Richard and had to leave him to say his own name but I don’t think he noticed.
Smiles or Eyes: both. yes i’m demanding. here is an example:
Sense of humor: I’m hilarious (and a fucking delight), but i have come to realise that i am not looking for GOSH in a partner, i’m looking for a Tiggerish complete absence of irony. it’s good to recognise these weaknesses in oneself.
Favourite things to do: produce and consume fanfic; objectify beautiful young men on the internet; drink. yes i’m a 40-something divorcee waiting to happen! aren’t you glad to have me in your life?
Last song you listened to: the mountain goats heel turn 2: listen to it then tell me the way he sings “You’ve found my breaking point, congratulations" doesn’t make you think of Poe Dameron tortured by Kylo Ren?
ANYWAY nobody actually tagged me I just jumped in anyway so in the same spirit please consider yourself tagged, if you are reading this TRUST ME I want to know your answers.