barely-noticable-but-

Barretos || Closed

There was always that adrenaline rush when you’re in the chute, tied down to the bull and tightening the rope with the crowd shouting in raucous Portuguese– something that Bucky just couldn’t get enough of. His third time to Barretos and he was still shaking as he sat with a two thousand pound bull between his legs. This one was already kicking and moving against the metal walls angrily.

He gave a nod and then he was out. It was hard to imagine it had been less than eight seconds by the time Bucky got thrown off, he ran to the fence, jumping up and pulling himself over onto the other side. He was breathing hard and barely noticed the men talking to him and patting his back. He did what he always did after a ride, disappeared to find his lover, wrapping his arms around Steve and holding him maybe a little too tight.

I’m in trouble. I’m sitting beneath the curl of a tidal wave, standing in the middle of the road as a car hurtles toward me. I’m stranded on the tracks, a train inexorable and heavy, bearing down.

I’ve got warning whistles blasting through my mind, sirens wailing, my every instinct has screamed at me to run since the day I met you, and I have no idea why I never really listened.

Until yesterday. Until the screaming sirens were swallowed in the roar of the tornado. Until I lay awake, way too late, trying to stumble my way into phrases, communicate the utter panic racing through me. 3 am, and I can’t stop thinking—



We’re walking down by the lake, and my hand drifts into yours, propelled by the gentle waves, so simply and naturally that I barely notice it until after it happens, and then—then I can’t notice anything else. I can’t even breathe.
The path narrows ahead, no divergence in sight, and we stride, side by side, hands still inexplicably linked even though we’re not like that, we don’t work that way, we don’t think that way, we’re friends, we’re still talking like we’re friends and your hand is brushing my palm—I swear I can feel you shaking, too. It’s more dangerous the longer we stay like this, more unlikely for us to brush it off or laugh about it later, and this is the part where I should be deciding to leave, the girl in the horror movie smart enough not to go in the woods.
But I’m not leaving.
I stay, overriding my every instinct, because I want you more than I’ve wanted anything else in the world. Because not being with you is what keeps me up at night. Because I don’t want to ever stop memorizing you.
And the path narrows further. Our hips brush, and the sky starts to darken, sunset slowly and suddenly to twilight, the silver creeping on the edges of the world, and everything gets even more dangerous.

You stop. Our hands linked, drawn closer, my palm to yours, holy
palm to palmer’s kiss–kiss me, please. I haven’t been able to think about anything else for so long, please kiss me, I think you’re my favorite person to talk to. Kiss me, I’m not afraid if you’re next to me.

By the time your lips brush against mine.
Softer than a butterfly’s wings…
I’m already fallen.

—  “fallen hearts and other natural disasters”
Maybe one day you’ll realize. You’ll realize why I do the things I do. How I get angry because I always feel like I would do so much for you, but you barely even notice me sometimes. That whenever I know that something’s happening to you, I always ask how things are or tell you goodluck; but you never do the same thing to me. I don’t think I’m asking for much.
Maybe one day you’ll realize; but right now I can’t take any more disappointment. I have to act like I don’t care, even though I really do.
Voice changes?

When can you expect voice changes to first start? Even if barely noticable. I always experience a slight voice drop on my period, which is when afab people have the highest amount of T naturally. Vocalists will actually sometimes avoid performing around their period for this very reason. My voice is having that same drop go on right now. My voice is still definitely female, but it sounds like I have shit in my throat rn.

I hope soon because literally it’s the only thing outing me at this point. “I have a hormonal condition.” usually works well enough, but yeah.

@alloutsidershere

The broken hearted boy walked into the cafe without really registering much. Flynn had just had the pleasure of walking in on seeing his girlfr- no, his ex girlfriend in bed with some other man. Needless to say, he was devastated. He ordered himself a drink and a muffin before taking a seat, mentally running through his past relationship. Where had he gone wrong? He barely noticed someone had approached him. “Pardon?” He asked politely, trying to shake himself out of it.

commission for guizhou, this one was a lot of fun

Alec 100% notices how Magnus rubs his fingers together when he’s nervous or unsure so whenever he sees him do it, he reaches out and intertwines their fingers and gently squeezes his hand and Magnus just instantly relaxes and pulls Alec a little closer to him