bard card


Behold: three Shakespeare-themed Valentine’s Day cards!

Find more here!

(These are not mine. I found them on a Facebook thread and through Google searches. If any of these are yours and you want them taken down, just shoot me a message. If any of these are yours and you want credit, just shoot me a message or comment on this.)
The smutty Shakespeare game you need for your next smarty-pants party
“Bards Dispense Profanity” challenges players to explore Shakespeare’s dirty side

“In the new game, released this month, a designated Profanity Judge lays down a card that shows an uncompleted sentence, such as: “I’m getting a degree in English. It’s basically four years of _______.” Players select appropriately suggestive Shakespeare cards from their hand…”


an empty cricket cage,
it holds god, fresh and
newly branded, contained

like a cow on a leash,
walked round the block,

or like an invisible dog
with a proud ecstasis,

a koan singer who is
carnal and quiet erotic asks the dog,
what is this delirium?
what is this hallucination,
what is this whorl.

ask noam chompsky, said the dog.
ask a ouiji board, said the block.
ask madame blavatsky, said the golden cow.

vallejo, answered the grassy knoll.
lorca, said the moon with a spoon.

to arrive at woman or snow or mailbox
from the wrong serpentine tree on 
the wrong ribbed road 

i love this storm, said i,
the privacy.
i move in swirls of light,
like an undertow.

jung marx malcome x
all burnt their draft cards
daft bards
laughed hard,

in seeking my lover
i hold my iphone close, but
first i play two dots as
i finger my own lips