band-of-the-day

I would like to point out something

band kids during the day: relatively collected, a bit wild and immature but have most of their shit together, can function

band kids at night: SCREAMING RAGEFUL MONSTERS ON CRACK OH MY GOD EVERYTHING IS DESTROYED THEY BLASTED A HOLE THROUGH THE WALL AND HAVE TAKEN THE ORCHESTRA KIDS HOSTAGE TIME AND SPACE DO NOT HEED THEM HOLY FUCK GOD SAVE THE QUEEN, cannot function

At a camp day when I was a freshman, my friends were talking about twerking, and I had no idea what it was. They started yelling to someone I’d never met, who was another freshman. He was more than happy to demonstrate for me…on my lap. It scarred me for life at the time. However, we’re both juniors now, the twerking guy is drum major, and we’ve been dating almost 2 years. He’s my best friend too. Whenever some one asks how we met, it’s a series of awkward glances. And yes he still twerks…
—  anonymous

VIDEO of the Day (NEW Photoset Preview Edition): “So many nerds, as far as the eye can see!” (TWRP, “Live Action Tour”) — The Fillmore Silver Spring — June 22nd, 2017

List of la la la na na na ran ran ran lai lai lai parts in H!P songs
  • 1998: Morning Musume - Tatoeba | Heike Michiyo - Shinkokyuu Shiyou!!
  • 1999: Morning Musume - Never Forget | Morning Musume - Furusato | Morning Musume - Da Di Du De Do Da Di!
  • 2000: Melon Kinenbi - Skip! | Country Musume - Hokkaido Shalala | Morning Musume - Tsuugaku Ressha  | Melon Kinenbi - FuwaFuwaFuu
  • 2001: Matsuura Aya - Machiawase | 7nin Matsuri - Summer Reggae! Rainbow | Morning Musume - Mr. Moonlight ~Ai no Big Band~ | Tanpopo - Nenmatsu Nenshi no Dai Keikaku | Matsuura Aya - MERRY X'MAS FOR YOU 
  • 2002: Matsuura Aya - Enkyori no Renai | Morning Musume - Ii Koto Aru Kinen no Shunkan | Morning Musume - Suki na Senpai | Morning Musume - Nan ni mo Iwazu ni I LOVE YOU | Minimoni - Chiccha na Chiccha na Onna no Ko
  • 2003: Morning Musume - Ganbacchae! | Melon Kinenbi - ENDLESS YOUTH | Morning Musume - “Suggoi Nakama” | Morning Musume - Megami ~Mousse na Yasashisa~ | Abe Natsumi - Koi | Minimoni - Kazoe Uta | Nakazawa Yuko - Tokyo Hatsu Saishuu
  • 2004: Matsuura Aya - LOVE TRAIN | Morning Musume - Dekiru Onna | Abe Natsumi - Toumorokoshi to Sora to Kaze | W - Robo Kiss | Matsuura Aya - I LOVE YOU no Tsuzuki | Ecomoni - Eco no Waltz
  • 2006: Morning Musume - Aozora ga Itsumademo Tsuzuku You na Mirai de | Morning Musume - Aruiteru | Morning Musume - Samui kara Fuyu da mon! | Morning Musume - Kotatsu no Uta ~jyuken story~
  • 2007: Morning Musume - Sayonara no Kawari ni | Morning Musume - BE Positive! | Matsuura Aya - Egao | Morning Musume - HELLO TO YOU 
  • 2008: C-ute - Lalala Shiawase no Uta | MilkyWay - Sansan GoGo | High-King - C\C (Cinderella\Complex) | Mano Erina - Lalala-Sososo
  • 2009: C-ute - Big dreams | Berryz Koubou - Rival | Frances & Aiko - Ma Ma de Hua | S/mileage - Asu wa Date na no ni, Imasugu Koe ga Kikitai | Mano Erina - Love&Peace=Paradise | Mano Erina - Itsumo Itsudemo
  • 2010: Buono! - Tabidachi no Uta | Morning Musume - Tomo | S/mileage - Onna Bakari no Nichiyoubi
  • 2011: Mano Erina - Seishun no Serenade | C-ute - 3ban Home 3ryoume
  • 2012: Mano Erina - Doki Doki Baby | Morning Musume - La La La no Pi Pi Pi
  • 2013: Peaberry - Niji no Seseragi | Kenshuusei - Ten Made Nobore! | Morning Musume - Wolf Boy | S/mileage - Ee ka!?
  • 2014: S/mileage - Mystery Night! | C-ute - Kanashiki Heaven (Single Version)
  • 2015: ANGERME - Otome no Gyakushuu | C-ute - Gamusha LIFE | Juice=Juice - Wonderful World | ANGERME - Tomo yo | ANGERME - Marionette 37℃ | ANGERME - Ase Kaite Carnival
  • 2016: C-ute - Naze Hito wa Arasoun Darou?
  • 2017: Juice=Juice - Feel! Kanjiru yo | Kobushi Factory - Shalala! Yareru Hazu sa | Country Girls - Rhythm ga Yonderuzo

Did I forget anything???

  • Pete: Hi
  • Brendon: it was the summer of 2001, and Joe meets Patrick and he's like "yo, I know about music." then Patrick's like "yo I know more about music!" "that's impossible. so you wanna start a band?" and Patrick's like, "yeah that's cool." and then, he's like "yo this is a book store not a music store." and then they met at Patrick's house. so Patrick's wearing shorts, socks, and a hat. Patrick is playing drums for some fuckin' reason and then Pete's there for some reason. and they start playing music together and they're like "oh, let's play some covers from some other bands." it was like Green Day, and fuckin' Misfits, and fuckin' Ramones. Pete said to Joe, "yo, that's dope, but we need a fuckin' drummer." because Patrick's playing drums and he's a singer. Patrick's like "yo, I got a soul voice," and they're like "wait how do you have a soul voice?" and he's like "yo, watch this: YEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEeeeeeeAAAAAAAAaaaaAAaahhh!" and they're like, "oh my god, that sounds like soul!" so they put it in a song, and it was like, "WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIIIIIIIiiiiiIIIIIIIIIiiiIIIIIIIGHT?!" and they're like "yo that's fuckin perfect, this is Fall Out Boy." and they made records like Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it. "it's called Evening Out With Your Girlfriend." with your ex-girlfriend. it's called evening out with your Ex-girlfriend. it's called eating out your girlfriend, and it's real and it doesn't matter. and Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he's like "you what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. yo, this is gonna be fuckin' doooooooooope!" so they made a record and it was called Take this to Your Grave. they made it without a drummer, and they had like 3—4 drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like Josh Freese, Neil Pert, the dude from Toto, the fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something, and they're like "you, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take This to Your Grave. Fuckin' record it." and he did, and he killed it, and he was like "bigidalililililillillilila, PSHHH!" killin' the skin, tapping the skins, tapping the rim, playin' the shit, killing these bitches, rapping it out. you're getting a fucking tattoo right now?! what the fuck is going on?! We should get signed to Fueled By Ramen, 'cause thee guys know what the fuck is going on. and they were like "yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin' hard, we will sign you guys." and Pete was like "yo, we got this record that's fuckin' dooooooope, dude, it's called Take This to Your Grave, it's called From Under the Cork Tree it's gonna be fucking huge." and then Patrick's like "I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic, these are three songs that are gonna make the album and it's called-BURP-Thnks Fr th Mmrs, 20 Dollar Nose Bleed, and Sugar, Were Goin' Down. and they made this record that was fuckin' dope, and it fucking hit on the charts like one two three, three two one, three four five six seven eight nine ten. ten to one. From Under the Cork Tree sold like four million records. ten million records. fifteen million records. and Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. and Patrick was like "that's gooooOOOOoooooOOOOOOOOd." Pete was like, "yo, fuck you I can do whatever I want." and Joe was like, "yeah it's cool man whatever I don't give a shit." and then Andy was like "eh, cool." and Pete was like "Make up is fuckin' great for a guy. because it makes a guy look beautiful, which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. and I wanna change that. I wanna make sure everyone thinks that guys are beautiful." I'm good so far yeah. yeah I do. SHUT THE FUCK. oh fuck, alright alright. Pete was like "oh my god, I'm so embarrassed about this dick pic." and then I saw the dick pic and was like "ah it's not bad." it's not a bad dick. let's be real. we made Rollins Stones one issue before Fall Out Boy. and Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed they were like "yo, fuck you guys!" they're like "yo! Panic! has the fuckin' cover for Rolling Stones, yo, fuck these dudes, we're gonna fucking go miles above. we're gonna hit every fuckin' continent there is known to man." but they didn't because they missed a second of time. apparently they were like "oh shit, we got every continent." and they didn't actually hit it. dude, and Pete was like, "WHAT THE FUCK?! 'oh you didn't fuckin' make the continent' it's like FUCK YOU!" so From Under the Cork Tree happens, we fuckin' have three-four years of awesomeness. like, people are coming in themselves 'cause it's so big. Alright so Fall Out Boy was like-- so Patrick's like "yo, we are going to name these records from under the Cork tree and from Innity-- from infinity on high." Pete was like "yo folie à deux means the theatric of two." "The madness of two." oh sorry I'm sorry. follow boy was like "yo we got to take a break." Meaning Pete was like "yo we got to take a break bro." and Patrick's like "I need time for my music. UHUhUhUHuhUUUh." and joes like "yo I need time to find the fucking art dude I got to find some fucking me-- metal" and andys like "i'm just gonna play with some fucking metal bands." and they're like "all right this breaks been like three years long two years long three years long 3 1/2? we gotta fucking come back man we gotta come back strong." you took my beer away what the fuck? "no you poured it all over yourself." "yeah you poured it on yourself man here." "we got to make this shit legit it's gonna be fucking dope it's going to go fucking sky high. we're going to make a fucking record that sails the skies. we're going to call this record save rock 'n' roll." so they made alone together light 'em up alone together Phoenix. and everybody's like "what the fuck? you're working with this guy who fuckin' recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk." is this pu-- what the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on myself? oh god. Pete was like "yo were gonna end up on a tour with Panic! At The Disco and twenty pilots. and that's all and that's all that matters. and that's just how the fuckin' story goes."
I HOPE ALL YOUR FAVOURITE BANDS PULL A 'GREEN DAY' AND STAY TOGETHER FOR A LONG ASS TIME

This also applies to Green Day, because they are awesome. Just keep doing what you’re doing guys. Don’t change, and keep up the good work 👍👍👍 [edit] If your favourite bands are no longer together *cough* mcr *cough* I hope they pull a ‘Fall Out Boy’ and rise from the ashes, before continuing to produce kickass music 🤞🤞🤞

some of the pranks green day has pulled on other bands
  • kaiser chiefs: green day brings an entire jazz band onto the stage during their set.
  • prima donna: crashes their set with toilet paper, confetti, booze, and costumes. also filled their dressing with smoke and confetti.
  • franz ferdiand: gets a bunch of random guys to play bagpipes onstage to while wearing kilts. also toilet paper flies everywhere.
  • jet: green day goes onstage dressed up as animals with a bunch of male strippers. the male strippers start taking their clothes off onstage.
  • the bravery: popcorn, mascots, male strippers, and toilet paper everywhere. the bravery actually got revenge on green day by “recreating” woodstock 94 and having mud flying around during their set.
  • rise against: tre cool brings a foosball table onstage and starts playing it with the band members during their show.
  • billy talent: tre cool gets the sound people to create a loud bang during the song “rusted from the rain”. the entire band gets really scared but then laugh after realizing it was tre pranking them.
  • paramore: same thing as billy talent. tre cool creates an unexpected explosion. 
  • 30 seconds to mars: this was at a music festival so they weren’t even technically playing with green day but tre (obviously) decided to prank them anyways. he goes onstage dressed up as jared leto and starts banging cymbals while dancing around the stage.
  • afi: green day comes onstage in the middle of their set dressed in animal mascot costumes.
  • my chemical romance: had a huge garbage bag full of popcorn above the stage that opened during mcr’s set, covering everything with popcorn. every time gerard way tried to say something into his microphone, a loud explosion would interrupt him. green day then proceeds to come onstage, fighting each other with light sabers.
  • jimmy eat world: green day would randomly set off concussion light blasts in the middle of songs.
  • the interrupters: green day crashed their set while in costume and tried blindfolding all the band members and putting tape over their mouths while the interrupters were trying to sing. 

there are more but these are some of my favourite ones. this band is honestly out of control.

quotes from the music department

*Repeatedly sings part of the music in scat*

“Ben swore to Jesus that if he didn’t help me at the concert he’d do thirty push-ups in front of the entire band, and I’m just as excited for this as you guys are.”

“If it were easy, football players would be doing this”

“We were 4.75 points off of the next band, and I’ll make certain this number will haunt you until next season.”

“Tomorrow’s gonna be a rough week.”

“I’ll just get a golf cart to follow the band in the parade. Maybe one day I’ll play a halftime show in a golf cart, all by myself.”

“No, Danny, you’re not starting a group chat for jazz.”

“Someone made me a 22&½-inch stick to measure steps. Don’t make me use it.”

“Trumpets, raise your right hand, and move it over to the person next to you. You’ll be fingering the notes on their trumpet.” *leans over to woodwinds* “this is gonna be really funny”

“We don’t have Thursday night rehearsal this week, so live the lives you have outside of band. So basically, catch up on homework.”

“Here it is– wait no, that’s 32 pages, that’s not right.”

“Before we step off on Saturday, you need to focus and say the following prayer”

“All the freshmen are on break, none of them are here!” *section leader raises hand* “Adeline’s here” “She’s the only one ADELINE WHY DONT YOU TAKE BREAKS IN THE STANDS”

“I hope this is loud enough, because this is as loud as its gonna get” *glares at the saxophone that forgot the speaker* “He forgot the speaker, my own flesh and blood.”

“As usual, the bassist knows the articulation and rhythms to the saxophone parts better than the saxophones do.”

*beatboxes to metronome*

“I want you to go home, do homework, practice, do more homework, have a milkshake, and practice some more.”

“If you want to annoy the heck out of a musician, play a cadence but leave out the last chord and wait like 20 minutes”

“this passage is called ‘Glendy Burk.’ I went to high school with her, actually.”

“you aren’t feeling well? Drugs?”

“while I was in the middle of complimenting you, you made a mistake”

“that saxophone line was jazzy as hell”

“you just have to play angrier”

“what’s the point if they’re all accented?”

“you squeaked in tune”

“can you take that d?”

“you can play my final pitch”

“imagine brass knuckles, but on a tambourine”

“I had to blow on my tongue”

“Bethany, you’re my number one!”

“the entire band is pianissimo, so play really loud. mezzo piano.”

“go through the head”

“BAD tambourine!!!”

“112 is the American tempo”

“the audience started clapping during the caesura. I didn’t know whether to continue on or leave the stage.”

“Matthew, while you were gone, Ed and I determined that you’re a freeloader”

“you came in early” “I don’t remember”

“did you just compare terrible bass parts to a terrorist attack?”

“Christ, Elizabeth, you’re such a violinist”

“All of our violas are at another rehearsal today, so we’ll begin today’s rehearsal with a prayer as that is the only thing that can save us.”

“We don’t have a spare bass bow to use while Ed’s is being rehaired, so you two are just gonna have to share. Yeah. Sorry about that.”

“Ah, yes, but what baroque style are we talkin’ here”

“It was at that point she handed the first chair violin a viola part. He proceeded to hand it back to her.”

“I went home and cradled that music. I never get original bass parts.”

“She turned the page in her score and forgot to continue conducting. Honestly, I would’ve been less surprised had she thrown her baton into the cello section”

“There are two basses in pit this year, so we’re an actual section, so he can’t just shove us in the corner this year HIGH FIVE”

“Does she really know how to buy a bow? She should make it a field trip so you get the right one.” *swings hands in air super wide* “it has to AGREE and BLEND with the instrument DO YOU SEE”

“When the orchestra director doesn’t know what to do she just asks the second chair. If he’s gone, she waits until a day he attends rehearsal to ask him.”

“Don’t be afraid to play out. Except during rests. Then you should be very afraid.”

“is it ok if I start to cry a little right now?”

“I had anaemia as a kid, and my schoolteacher’s name sounded like ‘anaemia’, so naturally, I hated her”

“she took the pen out of my hand and said, ‘no, Richard, use pencil.’ I was so mad”

“I don’t think it’s a coincidence that there are fewer bassists today and higher rates of suicide, gang violence, school shootings…”

“channel your inner Whitney Houston”

“play quietly, like you’re about to wake a baby. except you’re the baby, because you didn’t practice”

“I have another metronome app now. I collect them.”

“if someone calls my bass a cello one more time I’m gonna lose it”

“at the gig, a drunk guy came up to me, pointed to my harp, and called it a sideways piano”

“I want the space between these notes to be so big you can fit a little drawing of a house, a sun, a tree, and little dog in there.”

“90º angle notes”

“I want the sixteenth notes so sharp they could kill a man”

“turn the soundbox on”

“do you have a fancy phone? the answer is yes, yes you do.”

“I listened to the narration a few times before realising it was in German”

“I’ve got, like, four copies of that piece. the conductor keeps forgetting that I already have it and makes me a new copy.”

“soon I’ll have AIDS. Hearing aids, I mean. I’m old, is what I’m saying”

“more birdlike, turn on roundabout faster”

“kissing from the left is different from kissing from the right. not that I would know. asking for a friend.”

If you ever want someone's attention, send them this-

It’s summer of 2001; Joe meets Patrick and he’s like “Yo, I know about music.” and Patrick’s like “Yo, I know more about music” “That’s impossible. Do you wanna start a band?” And Patrick’s like “…Yeah… That’s cool.” And then he’s like “Yo, this is a book store, it’s not a music store!”

And then they met at Patrick’s house. And Patrick’s wearing shorts and socks and a hat. Patrick is playin’ drums for some fuckin’ reason! And Pete’s there, for some reason! They start playin’ music together. And there like “Oh, let’s play some fuckin’ covers from some other bands!” It was like, Green Day and fuckin’ Misfits and fuckin’ Ramones! Pete said to Joe “Yo, we gotta change this shit up! Yo we’ve played all these bands; let’s play shit from Fall Out Boy.” And so Pete and Patrick are like “Yo, that’s dope. But we need a fuckin’ drummer!” Because Patrick’s playin’ drums and he’s a singer! And he’s like “Yo! I got a soul voice!” And there like “Wait, how do you have a soul voice!?!” And he’s like “Yo watch this! Yeah!” and they’re like “Oh my god! That sounds like soul!” So they put it in the song and it was like “WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIGHT!”

And then they’re like “Yo, this is fuckin’ perfect. This is Fall Out Boy.” And they made records like, Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. its called Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it. Its called Eating Out Your Girlfriend, and its real and it doesn’t matter. And Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he was like “Yo, what the fuck! Yo this is gonna be fuckin’ dope!” So they made a record, and it was called take this to your grave. They made it without a drummer! And they had like three, four drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like… Josh Freese, Neil Peart, the dude from Toto… The fourth one was like the guy from papa roach or something. And they were like, “yo, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take this to your grave. Fuckin’ record it.” And he did it, and he killed it. He was like,Bigadigadigalalululapssshhhh! Killing the skins! Tapping the skins! Tapping the rims! Playing the shit! Killing these bitches! Wrapping it out!

“We should get signed, to Fueled by Ramen. ‘Cause these guys know what the fuck is going on.” And they were like “Yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin’ hard. We will sign you guys.” Pete was like ”Yo! We got this record that’s fuckin’ dope dude! It’s called Take This To Your Grave.“ Hey, its gonna be called From Under The Cork Tree, its gonna be fuckin’ huge. And then Patrick’s like “I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic. These are three songs that are gonna make the album and its called… This is called Thanks for the Memories, 20 Dollar Nosebleed, and Sugar We’re Going Down..” And they made this record that was fucking dope and it fucking hit on the charts.

Like one, two, three! Three, two one! Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten! TEN TO ONE! From Under The Cork Tree sold like, four million records! Ten million records! Fifteen million records! And Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. And Patrick was like “That’s good!” Pete was like “Yo, fuck you! I can do whatever I want!” Joe was like “Yeah, it’s cool man, whatever… I don’t give a shit.” And then Andy was like “Eh… Cool!” And Pete was like “Makeup is fuckin’ great for a guy. Because it makes a guy look beautiful. Which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. And I wanna change that.I wanna make sure everybody thinks that guys are beautiful.”

Pete was like “Oh my god, I’m so embarrassed about this dick pic!” And then I saw the dick pic, and I was like “Eh, it’s not bad. It’s not a bad dick. Let’s be real.” Panic! At The Disco made Rolling Stone one issue before Fall Out Boy. And Fall Out Boy made the issue right after Panic! And they were so pissed! They were like “Yo, fuck you guys!” They were like “Yo! Panic has the cover of Rolling Stone!?! Yo, fuck these dudes, were gonna go fucking miles above! We’re gonna hit every fucking continent there is known to man!” But they didn’t! Because they missed a second of time, apparently. They were like “Oh, shit we got every continent.” And they didn’t actually hit it. Dude, Pete was like “What the fuck!” oh you didn’t fuckin’ make the continent. It’s like, fuck you!

So From Under The Cork Tree happens, we fuckin’ have three, four years of awesomeness! Like people are cumming on themselves it’s so big! So Fall Out Boy was like, so Patrick’s like “Yo, we’re gonna name this record ‘From Under The Cork Tree’ and From Infinity In High.” Pete was like “Yo, folie a deux means, the theatric of two.” Fall Out Boy was like “Yo, we gotta take a break” meaning, Pete was like “Yo, we gotta take a break bro” and Patrick’s like, “Y need time for my music! Yeah!” And Joe’s like “Yo, I need time to find the fuckin’ art dude I gotta find some fuckin’ meau-metal.” And Andy’s like “I’m just gonna play with some fuckin’ metal bands.”

And they were like, “Alright, this breaks been like three years long. Two years long. Three years long. Three and a half. We gotta fuckin’ come back man. We gotta come back STRONG! We gotta make this shit legit. It’s gonna be fuckin dope. It’s gonna go fuckin sky high. We’re gonna make a fuckin’ record that sails the skies. We’re gonna call this record… Save Rock And Roll.” So they made Alone Together, Light 'Em Up, Alone Together, Phoenix. And everyone’s like “What the fuck? You’re working with this guy who fuckin’ recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk!” Pete was like “Yo, were gonna end up on the tour with Panic! At The Disco and Twenty Pilots.” And that’s all. And that’s all that matters. And that’s how the fucking story goes.

best story ever...

Pete: Hi
Brendon: it was the summer of 2001, and Joe meets Patrick and he’s like “yo, I know about music.” then Patrick’s like “yo I know more about music!” “that’s impossible. so you wanna start a band?” and Patrick’s like, “yeah that’s cool.” and then, he’s like “yo this is a book store not a music store.” and then they met at Patrick’s house. so Patrick’s wearing shorts, socks, and a hat. Patrick is playing drums for some fuckin’ reason and then Pete’s there for some reason. and they start playing music together and they’re like “oh, let’s play some covers from some other bands.” it was like Green Day, and fuckin’ Misfits, and fuckin’ Ramones. Pete said to Joe, “yo, that’s dope, but we need a fuckin’ drummer.” because Patrick’s playing drums and he’s a singer. Patrick’s like “yo, I got a soul voice,” and they’re like “wait how do you have a soul voice?” and he’s like “yo, watch this: YEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEeeeeeeAAAAAAAAaaaaAAaahhh!” and they’re like, “oh my god, that sounds like soul!” so they put it in a song, and it was like, “WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIIIIIIIiiiiiIIIIIIIIIiiiIIIIIIIGHT?!” and they’re like “yo that’s fuckin perfect, this is Fall Out Boy.” and they made records like Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it. “it’s called Evening Out With Your Girlfriend.” with your ex-girlfriend. it’s called evening out with your Ex-girlfriend. it’s called eating out your girlfriend, and it’s real and it doesn’t matter. and Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he’s like “you what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. yo, this is gonna be fuckin’ doooooooooope!” so they made a record and it was called Take this to Your Grave. they made it without a drummer, and they had like 3—4 drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like Josh Freese, Neil Pert, the dude from Toto, the fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something, and they’re like “you, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take This to Your Grave. Fuckin’ record it.” and he did, and he killed it, and he was like “bigidalililililillillilila, PSHHH!” killin’ the skin, tapping the skins, tapping the rim, playin’ the shit, killing these bitches, rapping it out. you’re getting a fucking tattoo right now?! what the fuck is going on?! We should get signed to Fueled By Ramen, ‘cause thee guys know what the fuck is going on. and they were like “yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin’ hard, we will sign you guys.” and Pete was like “yo, we got this record that’s fuckin’ dooooooope, dude, it’s called Take This to Your Grave, it’s called From Under the Cork Tree it’s gonna be fucking huge.” and then Patrick’s like “I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic, these are three songs that are gonna make the album and it’s called-BURP-Thnks Fr th Mmrs, 20 Dollar Nose Bleed, and Sugar, Were Goin’ Down. and they made this record that was fuckin’ dope, and it fucking hit on the charts like one two three, three two one, three four five six seven eight nine ten. ten to one. From Under the Cork Tree sold like four million records. ten million records. fifteen million records. and Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. and Patrick was like "that’s gooooOOOOoooooOOOOOOOOd.” Pete was like, “yo, fuck you I can do whatever I want.” and Joe was like, “yeah it’s cool man whatever I don’t give a shit.” and then Andy was like “eh, cool.” and Pete was like “Make up is fuckin’ great for a guy. because it makes a guy look beautiful, which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. and I wanna change that. I wanna make sure everyone thinks that guys are beautiful.” I’m good so far yeah. yeah I do. SHUT THE FUCK. oh fuck, alright alright. Pete was like “oh my god, I’m so embarrassed about this dick pic.” and then I saw the dick pic and was like “ah it’s not bad.” it’s not a bad dick. let’s be real. we made Rollins Stones one issue before Fall Out Boy. and Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed they were like “yo, fuck you guys!” they’re like “yo! Panic! has the fuckin’ cover for Rolling Stones, yo, fuck these dudes, we’re gonna fucking go miles above. we’re gonna hit every fuckin’ continent there is known to man.” but they didn’t because they missed a second of time. apparently they were like “oh shit, we got every continent.” and they didn’t actually hit it. dude, and Pete was like, “WHAT THE FUCK?! 'oh you didn’t fuckin’ make the continent’ it’s like FUCK YOU!” so From Under the Cork Tree happens, we fuckin’ have three-four years of awesomeness. like, people are coming in themselves 'cause it’s so big. Alright so Fall Out Boy was like– so Patrick’s like “yo, we are going to name these records from under the Cork tree and from Innity– from infinity on high.” Pete was like “yo folie à deux means the theatric of two.” “The madness of two.” oh sorry I’m sorry. follow boy was like “yo we got to take a break.” Meaning Pete was like “yo we got to take a break bro.” and Patrick’s like “I need time for my music. UHUhUhUHuhUUUh.” and joes like “yo I need time to find the fucking art dude I got to find some fucking me– metal” and andys like “i’m just gonna play with some fucking metal bands.” and they’re like “all right this breaks been like three years long two years long three years long 3 ½? we gotta fucking come back man we gotta come back strong.” you took my beer away what the fuck? “no you poured it all over yourself.” “yeah you poured it on yourself man here.” “we got to make this shit legit it’s gonna be fucking dope it’s going to go fucking sky high. we’re going to make a fucking record that sails the skies. we’re going to call this record save rock 'n’ roll.” so they made alone together light 'em up alone together Phoenix. and everybody’s like “what the fuck? you’re working with this guy who fuckin’ recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk.” is this pu– what the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on myself? oh god. Pete was like “yo were gonna end up on a tour with Panic! At The Disco and twenty pilots. and that’s all and that’s all that matters. and that’s just how the fuckin’ story goes

Shit Phase 1 Noodle Did To Annoy The Others

• Would respond to any chastising with “why?”. Once she managed to make Murdoc cry from frustration when he spent half an hour trying to explain why you can’t eat a yogurt with a pen lid.

• Would hide in the washing up basket for hours and make them all run around, worried sick, only to appear in a random place when she got bored and scare the shit out of them. One time 2D opened the fridge to find her eating a cake, after having been missing for nearly two days.

• Bathtime was an absolute NIGHTMARE because she loved to play submarine. Russel would come in with her towel and pyjamas, only to find the bathroom soaked.

• Related to the submarine incident, the water flooded through the ceiling into the kitchen and completely drenched Murdoc while he was trying to eat his Rice Krispies.

• 2D once drank her strawberry milk that she always had on a Saturday with breakfast and she screamed for a solid three hours. D can’t look at the stuff now without having a minor panic.

• She drew all over the walls without a care in the world. Russel would have told her off for it, but she drew a really cute mural of them in his bedroom in crayon so he couldn’t find it in his heart to be mad.

• Would sing “get the cool shoeshine” over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and ov-

• The band came home one day to find her sat in the living room playing with an iguana. No one knows how she acquired it, but Squish ended up becoming a full time resident of Kong Studios.

tag yourself - pop punk bands edition
  • A Day To Remember: switches between loving and despising their home town at the drop of a hat
  • As It Is: constantly nostalgic. all of the time.
  • Brand New: disappears for a long time without a word, reappears again as if nothing happened.
  • Citizen: would rather die than do literally anything
  • Knuckle Puck: oversensitive, uses too many big words without being 100% sure what they mean
  • Moose Blood: likes Brand New, in love with the same apathetic person
  • Neck Deep: just can't get over this one girl, will actually fucking stab you if you insult their home town
  • New Found Glory: couldn't care less about you
  • Real Friends: chainsmokes like an old lady, bony knees
  • State Champs: the friend that just appeared one day and nobody knows where they actually came from, but they're accepted anyway
  • Taking Back Sunday: still haven't gotten over that feud from 17 years ago
  • The Story So Far: blames a specific person for ruining them
  • The Wonder Years: //really really// loves their friends
Me as a parent
  • kid: mom tell me a story
  • me: it was the summer of 2001, and Joe meets Patrick and he's like "yo, I know about music." then Patrick's like "yo I know more about music!" "that's impossible. so you wanna start a band?" and Patrick's like, "yeah that's cool." and then, he's like "yo this is a book store not a music store." and then they met at Patrick's house. so Patrick's wearing shorts, socks, and a hat. Patrick is playing drums for some fuckin' reason and then Pete's there for some reason. and they start playing music together and they're like "oh, let's play some covers from some other bands." it was like Green Day, and fuckin' Misfits, and fuckin' Ramones. Pete said to Joe, "yo, that's dope, but we need a fuckin' drummer." because Patrick's playing drums and he's a singer. Patrick's like "yo, I got a soul voice," and they're like "wait how do you have a soul voice?" and he's like "yo, watch this: YEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEeeeeeeAAAAAAAAaaaaAAaahhh!" and they're like, "oh my god, that sounds like soul!" so they put it in a song, and it was like, "WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIIIIIIIiiiiiIIIIIIIIIiiiIIIIIIIGHT?!" and they're like "yo that's fuckin perfect, this is Fall Out Boy." and they made records like Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it. "it's called Evening Out With Your Girlfriend." with your ex-girlfriend. it's called evening out with your Ex-girlfriend. it's called eating out your girlfriend, and it's real and it doesn't matter. and Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he's like "you what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. yo, this is gonna be fuckin' doooooooooope!" so they made a record and it was called Take this to Your Grave. they made it without a drummer, and they had like 3—4 drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like Josh Freese, Neil Pert, the dude from Toto, the fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something, and they're like "you, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take This to Your Grave. Fuckin' record it." and he did, and he killed it, and he was like "bigidalililililillillilila, PSHHH!" killin' the skin, tapping the skins, tapping the rim, playin' the shit, killing these bitches, rapping it out. you're getting a fucking tattoo right now?! what the fuck is going on?! We should get signed to Fueled By Ramen, 'cause thee guys know what the fuck is going on. and they were like "yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin' hard, we will sign you guys." and Pete was like "yo, we got this record that's fuckin' dooooooope, dude, it's called Take This to Your Grave, it's called From Under the Cork Tree it's gonna be fucking huge." and then Patrick's like "I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic, these are three songs that are gonna make the album and it's called-BURP-Thnks Fr th Mmrs, 20 Dollar Nose Bleed, and Sugar, Were Goin' Down. and they made this record that was fuckin' dope, and it fucking hit on the charts like one two three, three two one, three four five six seven eight nine ten. ten to one. From Under the Cork Tree sold like four million records. ten million records. fifteen million records. and Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. and Patrick was like "that's gooooOOOOoooooOOOOOOOOd." Pete was like, "yo, fuck you I can do whatever I want." and Joe was like, "yeah it's cool man whatever I don't give a shit." and then Andy was like "eh, cool." and Pete was like "Make up is fuckin' great for a guy. because it makes a guy look beautiful, which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. and I wanna change that. I wanna make sure everyone thinks that guys are beautiful." I'm good so far yeah. yeah I do. SHUT THE FUCK. oh fuck, alright alright. Pete was like "oh my god, I'm so embarrassed about this dick pic." and then I saw the dick pic and was like "ah it's not bad." it's not a bad dick. let's be real. we made Rollins Stones one issue before Fall Out Boy. and Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed they were like "yo, fuck you guys!" they're like "yo! Panic! has the fuckin' cover for Rolling Stones, yo, fuck these dudes, we're gonna fucking go miles above. we're gonna hit every fuckin' continent there is known to man." but they didn't because they missed a second of time. apparently they were like "oh shit, we got every continent." and they didn't actually hit it. dude, and Pete was like, "WHAT THE FUCK?! 'oh you didn't fuckin' make the continent' it's like FUCK YOU!" so From Under the Cork Tree happens, we fuckin' have three-four years of awesomeness. like, people are coming in themselves 'cause it's so big. Alright so Fall Out Boy was like-- so Patrick's like "yo, we are going to name these records from under the Cork tree and from Innity-- from infinity on high." Pete was like "yo folie à deux means the theatric of two." "The madness of two." oh sorry I'm sorry. follow boy was like "yo we got to take a break." Meaning Pete was like "yo we got to take a break bro." and Patrick's like "I need time for my music. UHUhUhUHuhUUUh." and joes like "yo I need time to find the fucking art dude I got to find some fucking me-- metal" and andys like "i'm just gonna play with some fucking metal bands." and they're like "all right this breaks been like three years long two years long three years long 3 1/2? we gotta fucking come back man we gotta come back strong." you took my beer away what the fuck? "no you poured it all over yourself." "yeah you poured it on yourself man here." "we got to make this shit legit it's gonna be fucking dope it's going to go fucking sky high. we're going to make a fucking record that sails the skies. we're going to call this record save rock 'n' roll." so they made alone together light 'em up alone together Phoenix. and everybody's like "what the fuck? you're working with this guy who fuckin' recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk." is this pu-- what the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on myself? oh god. Pete was like "yo were gonna end up on a tour with Panic! At The Disco and twenty pilots. and that's all and that's all that matters. and that's just how the fuckin' story goes."
When Styles returned to L.A., an idea landed. The idea was: Get out of Dodge. Styles called his manager, Jeffrey Azoff, and explained he wanted to finish the album outside London or L.A., a place where the band could focus and coalesce. Four days after returning from the movie, they were on their way to Port Antonio on Jamaica’s remote north coast. At Geejam, Styles and his entire band were able to live together, turning the studio compound into something like a Caribbean version of Big Pink. They occupied a two-story villa filled with instruments, hung out at the tree-house-like Bush Bar, and had access to the gorgeous studio on-site. Many mornings began with a swim in the deserted cove just down the hill. Life in Jamaica was 10 percent beach party and 90 percent musical expedition. It was the perfect rite of passage for a musician looking to explode the past and launch a future. The anxiety of what’s next slipped away. Layers of feeling emerged that had never made it past One Direction’s group songwriting sessions, often with pop craftsmen who polished the songs after Styles had left.