balancing books on your head

Gryffindor is staying up all night to plan a prank. It’s running around with sparklers during a carnival. Gryffindor is finally standing up to a bully after awhile. Gryffindor is laughing so hard you almost pee your pants. It’s staying in your pajamas all day on Christmas Day. It’s screaming at the top of your lungs because your favorite team won a game. Gryffindor is being too competitive at video games. Gryffindor is laughing even though you’re not supposed to. It’s listening to music while you’re working. Gryffindor is freedom and bravery.

Ravenclaw is cleaning the steam from a hot drink off of your glasses. It’s walking down a hall while balancing a book on your head. Ravenclaw is buying ugly Christmas sweaters with your friends. Ravenclaw is practicing a dance routine over and over again even if you perfected it. It’s having your own little area at a library. It’s correcting a teacher even if they’re terrifying. Ravenclaw is binge watching your favorite shows for the fifth time. Ravenclaw is getting paint on your face. It’s drinking hot chocolate on a cold, rainy day. Ravenclaw is creativity and knowledge.

Hufflepuff is laying in the sun with your pet. It’s staying home and eating pizza instead of going to a fancy restaurant. Hufflepuff is wearing flannel with everything. Hufflepuff is forcing your friends to dance with you. It’s kisses in the rain. Hufflepuff is hugs that seem to last forever. Hufflepuff is having your crush like you back. It’s road trips and screaming your favorite song. Hufflepuff is getting whipped cream on your nose. It’s standing up for your friends when they can’t defend themselves. Hufflepuff is love and loyalty.

Slytherin is slicked back ponytails. It’s the satisfaction of hearing your high heels on hard ground. Slytherin is eating a whole pizza because someone said you couldn’t. It’s dark colors and pastels combined. Slytherin is doodling on your arm because you’re bored. It’s forcing your cat to lay down with you. Slytherin is blowing all your money on the perfect birthday present. Slytherin is having an office on the highest floor. Slytherin is helping someone so they’ll help you later. It’s starting work a few days before it’s due. Slytherin is ambition and cleverness.

How to Be a Woman

In the 1800’s
Press whalebones to your ribs
and carry a parasol. Don’t let the sun
kiss your ivory skin—death
is the perfect complexion.
Balance a book on your head,
climb the Eiffel Tower with a straight
back and high bust.
Pluck songs from the piano, paint sunshine
and weave daisies into a tapestry.
In the presence of men, be flirty, comely,
and dumb—no man claims a bride
for her intelligence.
Give birth to monarchs since you can’t
become one yourself.

In the 1930’s
Freud says all you want is a penis
so your opinion will matter,
so your role will be bigger
than the baby clamped to your breast.
Hold your tongue when your boss
gives your butt a good morning pat—
he pays the meager wages your husband
makes in an hour.
Take pride in the silly little movements
sprouting up around you: it’s cute
your friends think you can handle the right
to vote.
When your man returns from war,
be his pearl-clad June Cleaver:
your trim figure forever adorned
in apron, roast in the oven and children at play.
Dote on him, slippers and pipe, a fire
to warm his feet.

In the 1960’s
In an era of free love, your pockets stuffed
with birth control, head bumping the glass ceiling,
it’s advised you don’t question the status quo.
America is in turmoil because your kind
is dissatisfied with the pittance you’ve been given.
The echoes of your war cries can be heard
by suits in D.C., and they fear you.
While you’re at it, show a little skin!
Raise the hemline of your skirt to match
the plunging neckline of your blouse.
You mother may be appalled, but at least
you’re not a pin-up girl.

In the 2000’s
The definition of “woman”
is a crooked fence around a storied past.
In one breath society tells you “thin is in,”
and in another, “big is beautiful.”
There is no singular meaning to the word,
no cookie-cutter pattern to follow.
Some of the most gorgeous girls are born
with a bat and balls. Some lose their breasts
to cancer, and some simply bind them
for a night.
Maybe she was born that way,
or maybe it’s Maybelline. Maybe she’s keeping
Victoria’s little secret.

A woman is not a slut for the men who’ve
made her bed their burrow, nor a prude
for the brilliance of her untouched chastity.
She can wear her hem as high or low as she chooses,
can loosen or tighten her stays at will.
She is not a toy to be played with, but she
can play the game as well as any man.

A woman has the right to speak
her mind, and the ability to decide
when, or if she’ll speak.
Her place is not the home—it’s wherever
she feels most at home.

Because a woman is the apple and the tree
that bears the fruit. She is as useful
as she is lovely, as hardened as she is soft.
A woman has skin all the colors of the rainbow,
but never assume you are entitled to her
pot of gold.

Ask any female how to be a woman
and she will tell you: a woman is whatever
she designs herself to be.

EXO REACTION TO YOU SPENDING ALL OF YOUR MONEY ON BOOKS/BEING A BOOKNERD

BOOKS ARE AWESOME

KAI

K: “Hey jagi so what did you spend your birthday money on?”

Y/N: “Books, oh gosh I bought so many”

K: “Should have known”

SEHUN

*He had tried to cuddle with you earlier but you weren’t having it because you didn’t want to be distracted from the end of your book. You had finished now so you had come to find him*

Y/N: “Still want some hugs”

SH: “Oh now you want me, well sorry jagi but the time for hugs is over”

SUHO

*When you two are sitting in silence together it’s usually because you had delved yourself into a good book and he doesn’t want to disturb you, but he steals glances from time to time taking note of how your facial expressions change when something interesting happens*

CHANYEOL

*When he wants your attention he takes some of your books and balances them on his head to amuse you*

CY: “I’m over here jagi… and so are your books”

BAEKHYUN

*He finds the facial expressions you make when reading a book funny and cute so he puts on his glasses and sits next to you mimicking what you do*

D.O

*Encourages you on your goal of trying to finish this book in a day because that way he gets to spend time with you without your head in a book, however he does like the fact that you are a book nerd*

CHEN

*It was your birthday and he was with you and your family whilst you were opening your presents, when you opened your present from him you just saw a box full of books, and they happened to be the exact ones you had wanted to read for ages*

C: “Oh and the award for best birthday present goes to me”

TAO

*He knew how much you loved a certain book and that it was your favourite, so he took it upon himself to read it just so he could:

-Impress you

-and help you fan girl over the book

T: “Yes I am the best boyfriend ever I know”

LAY

*You were up till the early hours reading a really interesting story but whenever something major happened you tended to voice it out loud, waking up Lay in the process*

Y/N: “No, he did not just do that you can’t be serious!”

L: “Wait whats that noise”

KRIS

*He walks in your bedroom and trips over one of the many books that are scattered over your floor*

K: “Baobei, I know you love books but I’m tall and when I fall over the ground quakes so please pick them up”

LUHAN

LH: “Hey Y/N, can we go out now”

Y/N: “Wait just let me finish this chapter”

*GIF*

XIUMIN

*He finds it really attractive that you love to read books and he swears every time he comes round your house the amount of books on your shelf has always increased*

XM: “Your not going to have any space soon jagi”


*None of these GIFS are mine credit to the owners*

SEND IN (NON SMUTTY) REQUESTS

2

Gif source:  Elijah

Imagine having trouble sleeping, so you see if Elijah is awake and you find him reading in bed, so he lets you sleep there and you curl up next to him whilst he reads and strokes your hair and is all cute.

——— Request for anon ———

He can’t help but smile as you dive under the covers as he holds them up for you, your welcome escape from the cold hardwood beneath your bare feet, “Want me to read to you?”

You situate yourself softly against his chest, feeling his hand come to rest on the side of your head, stroking soothingly as he balances his book in his other, “What are you reading?”

ProTip #47: Balance a book on your head

When studying for hours on end, or sitting at a desk for hours on end, it’s natural to end up tired, hunched over the desk, and have a horrible crick in your neck at the end of the day. Plus, you can end up with some medical issues from poor posture over the years!

To stave this off, sit with your back straight (pretend you’re balancing something on your head) and your head only slightly tilted downward, and drink a lot of cold water. This will help you breath deeper, stay hydrated, and consequently keep you more alert.

Ways to help with posture:

  • put a tape marker over the spot where you USUALLY end up hunched over your desk; this will remind you to not stray from your posture
  • tape a reminder to your computer/lamp/cubby: “sit up STRAIGHT” usually works for me

Get things UP and to your eye level:

  • an old shoebox as a computer stand
  • a stack of old textbooks as a computer stand
  • bookstands can be very cheap, save space, and prevent you from hunching over your textbooks!

Ways to stay hydrated:

  • put fruit in your water (I like cucumbers & citrus)
  • keep (unsweetened) pre-prepared tea on hand
  • put a checklist of how much water you drank today (half your body weight in ounces is good!)
  • put reminders in your work space (post its are good and don’t cause any residual stickiness)