baker!clint

146.

For the nonny who wanted Pride xx

There should be more of a variety of gay clubs, in Clint’s opinion. It’s all about the pounding bass, the diva hits, the sweat and the grinding and he gets that, he does, but when you’re a deaf PTSD suffering clumsy archer with no rhythm, sometimes all you want is a really gay bagel.

So when he sees the rainbow flag sticker in the window next to the gorgeous looking cupcakes, when he takes a step back and realises the damn shop’s called Cake Boys and there’s pride flag bunting strung in honour of the day, there’s really no other option but to push open the door with a cheerful ‘ting’ and take a lungful of warm sweet air.

There’s a guy behind the counter when Clint walks in, and Clint offers an automatic grin. The guy eyes him up and down - his shirt’s a little tighter than usual, and his jeans are somehow trailing glitter - and walks through the beaded curtain behind the counter. Someone else gets shoved out in his place (and there’s no question it’s a shove, he almost crushes a cream horn).

“Hey,” the guy says. Unlike the first guy - dark hair, stubble, beautiful in the way of things that can kill you - this one’s like a perfected version of Clint. Clint hates him, just a little, on principle. “What can I get you?”

“No clue,” he says, honestly. “Never had that much of a sweet tooth.”

“Cheese danish?” The guy asks. His name tag says 'Steve’, but it’s been doctored to 'cap'n Steve’ and has a red star sticker half hanging off the edge.

“Sure,” Clint says. “That sounds great.”

“Hey Buck,” Steve hollers, “cheese danish ready?”

“Yeah, yeah, keep your freakin’ shirt on,” is the growled reply, and then the guy from before emerges, carrying a tray of faintly steaming pastry. He’s got his hair tied back but a couple strands have fallen free, and Clint gets a sudden and inexplicable urge to carefully tuck them behind the guy’s ear. He’s pretty sure it wouldn’t be welcomed, though, the way the guy’s glaring at him.

Steve bags up a danish, takes Clint’s money and makes change, and the whole time Clint’s the subject of a grey-eyed stare. He takes a bit of the danish almost absently, has to suck in air quickly to cool the lava he’s choking down, and it’s a second before the taste hits.

“Holy shit,” Clint says. “Holy *shit*.”

“Good?” Steve says, with the confidence of someone who knows there can only be one answer.

“Marry me,” Clint moans, unashamed, and Steve laughs and jerks his thumb at the angry kitchen guy.

“Bucky’s the baker,” he informs Clint. “I mostly just stand out front and look pretty.”

“Don’t want to intimidate them with the sexy death glare?” Clint says, and Bucky - whose name tag proclaims him to be 'Sarge’ and has a star and a skull at either end - looks a little startled for a second before turning abruptly and pushing back through the bead curtain, looking a little pink.

Steve watches him go, grinning fondly, and Clint feels a little pang at the obvious affection there. Obviously the both of them are too hot to be single, but Clint can pine over Bucky’s face a little if he wants to.

“Thanks,” Clint says, raising the pastry a little in a toast.

“No problem,” Steve says, and flicks another little grin over his shoulder. “Hope we see you around.”

Fun Facts About Extended Avengers Family Part I

Part II Part III

Bruce Banner loves scented candles. His and Tony’s lab always smell like either vanilla or lavender.

Clint Barton is terrified of ghosts. Bucky and Tony once played (intentionally harmless) a prank on him which resulted in Clint not talking to them for a week. (and sleeping with Bucky Bear in the process of recovery.)

Tony once appeared in an episode of Sesame Street. Clint dubbed the video as “Best Sex Tape of The Tony Stark” New members of Avengers are never amused.

Sam Wilson hates mashed potato. He doesn’t have time for your bullshit when he can have perfectly tasty french fries.

Pepper Potts once put hair dye in Tony’s shampoo. A little misstep in the process caused Steve to end up with purple hair instead of Tony.

After Steve Rogers’ begging (and puppy eyes) they all went to get tattoos together. Every single one of them has a tattoo that represents the team.

Thor is allergic to chocolate. How can a god be allergic to something that simple, don’t ask. Though when he ended up in the hospital after eating three boxes of Hershey’s Kisses it was pretty clear.

Jane and Maria once had a drinking competiton in which they both ended up vomiting all around the tower. (Darcy and Thor held their hair back, don’t worry.)

Darcy Lewis once baked Bucky cookies because she beat his ass in Wii and he got upset.

Whenever the team is gathered together they play Trivial Pursuit. With the different experiences everyone has, it lasts really long. (once they played for eight hours straight.)

Pietro Maximoff is Dum-E’s favourite person after Steve Rogers.

Vision has a great ability silence everyone in a second. He is Steve’s second second hand.

Bucky and Tony once prepared a mixtape for Steve together. It has all the hideous songs from 1920 to 2015.

James Rhodes is obsessed with Greek Mythology. He and Sam always cosplay as one of the gods in Halloween.

Clint and Tony once got so drunk in an impromptu trip to Vegas, they ended up getting married. Neither Bucky or Steve were impressed.

Natasha Romanoff once made the team have an underwear party. Reasons are still unknown but there were scenes no one wanted to see.

Tony Stark is the biggest music buff you can meet. He can play four different instruments. He also once sang for Bucky when he was having a panic atack.

On Wanda and Pietro’s birthday Tony threw the biggest party they could ever imagine. If he saw them both tearing up a little he didn’t say anything.

Bucky wears two pair of socks during winter and then puts his toes under Clint’s tighs. That’s the only way they don’t feel cold.

Tony sits on Steve’s lap during movie nights. No one bats an eyelash.

Bucky and Natasha call Tony kotehok. Tony calls them idioti.

Once it was raining so hard, and the rain lover Wanda and Rhodey made them all go out. They danced and laughed and kissed for hours in the rain. Sam ended up getting hypotermia.

Bruce is the best cooker of the bunch but he is shit when it comes to baking. Shokingly Vision, Bucky and Darcy are the best bakers.

Pietro once found Clint and Bucky having sex in the kitchen. He still threatens them with this piece of information and gets whatever he wants because they know Steve would kill them both if he hears about it. (Especially after team objected to Steve and Tony having sex in public places.)

Natasha loves borrowing Clint’s children. No she doesn’t care they are Clint and Bucky’s, she can borrow them whenever she wants.

Pepper hates pizza. Whenever they order from outside they get fried chicken for her. Tony rolls his eyes but doesn’t say anything.

Clint once ate three pints of ice cream to prove Thor that he can do it. Consequences Bucky dealt with.

Bruce is obsessed with sand glass art. He collects them whenever he can and crafts different gifts for his friends.

Bucky Barnes is a big David Fincher trash. He loves all of his movies and has collecter’s edition of every. single. one. of. them. Tony approves.

Jane and Tony once got into a very heated argument over space that Thor threatened Tony with walking around naked for a month.

After a battle Rhodey ended up with high pitched noise as a result of magic and Steve didn’t let him live it down for the rest of the year.

Clint, Tony and Rhodey are obsessed with Easter Egg games. They came up with different levels and all. The first year Natasha and Bucky’s team won against Jane and Tony’s and it was hilarious.

Natasha and Wanda are so scary together. Once they tickled Tony to the point of tears. Steve laughed for months about that.

Sam is so obsessed with puppies. Clint and he came up with a box of them after a battle. Every teammate has their own puppies. Kinda like pokemons. Thor’s is a dalmatian called Spice. She is pretty.

After seeing so many Avengers attempt self improvement and inner peace through non violent options (ballet, researching ancient history, playing with magnets, etc) Clint decides to take a baking class at the local community college. No one knows he’s an Avenger and if he screws up, it’s somewhat edible. Surprising everyone, he’s one of the best cake bakers in the class.