bagginshield plot bunnies

Bagginshield Prompt Idea

Idea: The heart of the mountain is found but it’s not a stone, it’s a being

Also Idea: That being is Bilbo Baggins and he is mighty pissed to be woken up and how long has he been sleeping and what the hell are all these Dwarves doing in his mountain?

I’m wavering between if it would be hilarious or tragic if Thorin fell in love with Bilbo fairly early on, but didn’t recognise the feeling as love.

So when he overhears Kíli going on about Tauriel: about how his heart races and his chest feels lighter and how he can’t help but smile when he sees her, Thorin basically goes:

“That’s not love, Kíli,” Thorin says, shaking his head.

“It’s not?” Kíli asks, a frown settling between his brows.

“It’s admiration and friendship, like what I feel for Bilbo.”

“Your heart skips a beat when you look at Bilbo?”

Well, not always. Just when the sun catches his hair just so, or when he scrunches up his nose, or when his hands flutter about in that particularly endearing way or-

Oh fuck, Thorin thinks, or something to that effect, his eyes widening with abrupt realisation.

That *is* love.

Bagginshield Plot Bunnies Afoot

Suddenly, I had a Bunny bite me.

I mean, what if Belladonna Baggins nee Took was still alive at the time of the Quest of Erebor? 

(I would like to propose a Middle Earth AU where Took and Brandybuck Hobbits live to be 200 and the rest have an average lifespan of 150 because I like my Happily Ever After Universes please and thank you.)

Maybe Bella had gone off to the Sea with some of her cousins for a vacation and had wanted Bilbo to go but Bilbo begged off because Mama Bella would want to matchmake her “sweet boy who won’t give me grandbabies!” and he’s like “AHAHAHAHAHAHA NO Mama, I’m a Confirmed Bachelor please and thank you.  And I don’t like that cousin of Fredegar, sweet Yavanna no.”

And so Gandalf meant to have both Bella and Bilbo as burglars but only finds Bilbo so Bilbo gets to be Sole Burglar.  So when Mama Bella comes back and finds her boy “run off with Dwarves” she’s all OMG! and thinks Dwobbit grandbabies may be in the future. 

But Bilbo comes back heartbroken because Certain Dwarf Kings are Idiots and Certain Hobbits Also Do Very Dumbass Things in the Name of Love.  But eventually Thorin finally gets some sense beat into him and goes running back to the Shire to beg his love’s forgiveness and propose marriage…

… but this time, he’s got to impress Mama Bella and honey, she ain’t happy that this Dwarf King (never mind the Ridiculous Handsomeness and that Knickers-Melting Smile) broke her baby’s heart.

** cackling **

OTP Prompts from Work

@alkjira said “To combat all the coffeeshop aus, can’t we all just share five plot bunnies based on our own occupation/daily life and/or experiences?” and I thought I’d join in :)

(I’m a Lab Assistant/Phlebotomist)

- A patient is being really nasty to me, swearing and yelling and oh my gosh I think they’re going to throw something at me but you intervene and get them safely removed from the clinic thank you for saving me…again

- This patient has super tricky veins and I can’t find them please help - wow how did you make it look so easy your fingers must be magic and now I’m wondering what kind of magic they could do on me…

- You come ‘round once a day to pick up all our samples and take them to the lab. I’m still new at this and I’m always running late getting everything packaged but you wait patiently and tell me to take my time, and omg wait are you seriously flirting with me while my hands are filled with tubes of blood and urine?

- It’s been a super stressful day at work. Our clinic was short-staffed, again, and the patients were especially rude today. We both worked overtime and we’re absolutely exhausted and never want to talk to another human being again but now you’re inviting me to get a drink and vent and how can I resist

- I have to take a toddler’s blood and they’re screaming and crying and the parent isn’t really helping because they’re getting upset watching their precious child get bloodwork. Please someone help I don’t want to re-poke this poor baby and you come in and wow you calmed that child down in record speed and I find that more attractive than I probably should

Thorin is a romantic, and a dork, if we combine these two traits hilarity ensues.

Especially if we add in oblivious Bilbo.

Both of them are are students at the same Uni, and they’ve got a few courses together even though they’ve got different majors.

Thorin is smitten. Bilbo sneaks glances when he thinks no one is looking. Both think that the other would turn them down.

At the end of the semester Thorin finally finds his courage (okay, well, Dwalin and or Balin finds it for him. There might be blackmail involved.) and he’s going to ask Bilbo out. Only he wants to do it properly. With flowers. Because Bilbo likes flowers. Thorin knows this, and like all the little tidbits he’s found out about Bilbo this is treasured information. 

So he heads for uncharted territory, the flower shop. He’s going to get roses. You can’t go wrong with roses. Or so he hopes.

Only who does he find behind the counter working part-time at that very flower shop? 


And unfortunately Thorin isn’t so much tongue tied in Bilbo’s presence as he has a tendency of ending up with the foot-in-mouth syndrome… Especially when he feels at a disadvantage. 


“Oh, hello Thorin,” Bilbo smiled. “What can I help you with?”

“Flowers,” Thorin said, immediately wanting to smack himself in the head. “Of course. I was looking for some flowers for a-” don’t say date. Can’t buy flowers from him and to him at the same time. Not a date. Wedding. Fuck, don’t say wedding. No weddings. “Funeral,” Thorin blurted.

Bilbo’s expression melted into surprised concern. “I’m sorry, is it for someone you were close to?”


“You told him I was dead?” 

Thorin did not need to see Frerin to know his brother’s facial expression. 

“I- panicked.”

“Good to know I’m likely to end up dead if you panic.” Frerin’s sighed and Thorin could hear him tapping his fingers against the bottom of the phone. “So what did he say when you explained?”


“Thorin, you did tell him that there’s not actually a funeral, right? As I’m not actually dead?”

Thorin closed his eyes and gripped his mobile a little harder. “He’s making you a wreath.”

Thorin and Bilbo going camping. It could be either one’s idea, albeit for different reasons, but I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them promised Dís to take the boys in a weak moment, lol


“Uncle Thorin, Uncle Bilbo, wake up wake up wake up!”

“Your nephews want you,” Bilbo murmurs and burrows down deeper into the sleeping bag.

“Before sunrise they’re your nephews.”

“You did not just quote the lion king at me.”


Kíli and Fíli being determined to teach Bilbo how to swim, Kíli having learnt it only the last summer and now full of excitement. Well, even more than normal.


Bilbo surfaces with a splutter. “I’m sorry boys, but I don’t think I will get the hang of floating.”

Kíli pouts slightly. “Are you thinking light thoughts?”


Bilbo and Fíli being forbidden to be too near the fire after the incident with the pine cones and the forest that could have burnt down.


“It looked really cool though,” Kíli whispers as he pats Bilbo’s hand and Bilbo secretly agrees.


Thorin being stalked by squirrels.


“Maybe they want your nuts, uncle,” Fíli suggest and Bilbo needs to take a minute as to not choke to death on laughter. Thorin pauses, hand half way to his mouth and then he tosses the walnut into the forest.

The squirrels are even more devoted to him after that.


And Kíli meeting a small redhead and immediately starting the Tauriel fan club after she saves him from a “really large spider”.

What I’d like right now is a fic where Bilbo stayed in Erebor post BoFA (everyone lived of course, don’t be silly that’s what happened in canon) and he married Thorin and they’re quite ridiculously happy together.

There might have been some worry that the rest of the Dwarven kind wouldn’t be very enthusiastic about having a Hobbit as the royal consort, but basically everyone loves Bilbo. 

Some… quite literally.

There’s a… guard, or something like that, a little older than Fíli, who has the biggest most obvious crush on Bilbo since, well, since Thorin to be quite honest. 

And just like Thorin he thinks that he’s doing a good job keeping it secret (spoiler, everyone knows). Well, everyone, except for Bilbo. Because Bilbo is more than a bit oblivious when it comes to things concerning himself.

Anyway, imagine the poor guard’s face the day when Thorin tells the him that he knows about the crush.

The guard basically thinks that Thorin is going to either punch him or exile him. Or punch him and then exile him. (The other way around wouldn’t be very logical)

But Thorin doesn’t do either of those two things. 

Keep reading

Bilbo stays in Erebor for the winter and Thorin the sweet doofus tries to play the matchmaker, thinking that if Bilbo falls for someone he might stay (and thus Thorin can continue to admire him from afar).

Meanwhile Bilbo is like, okay he has the winter to try and figure out if Thorin could love him back. Only whenever he tries to be alone with Thorin someone inevitably comes along to make conversation and ask strange questions, drat.

So Bilbo is frustrated everyone seems to think him a curiosity and Thorin is frustrated Bilbo isn’t as much as holding hands with any of the worthy Dwarfs he handpicked for his burglar (and also quietly relieved deep down. But he would much rather see Bilbo every day and never hold him, compared to being half a world away, so he’s also depressed)

Unless someone takes pity on them everything would come to a point when Thorin is like: I DONT KNOW WHAT I CAN DO TO MAKE YOU STAY!!?


and then happy ending.

- Bilbo and Thorin meeting because they’re both on really boring dates and both tried to hide in the bathroom to text for help.

- Bilbo and Thorin both taking the same bus/subway to work every day and discreetly ogling each other. And then comes the day with the traffic issues and they get stuck together for an hour.

- They get the seats next to each other on the airplane and one of them falls asleep on the other’s shoulder and the cabin crew thinks they’re a couple and the awake one doesn’t tell them otherwise.

- They each get a skydiving jump as a Christmas present and despite knowing better they both get teased into going through with it. Adrenaline is a good aphrodisiac, yes?

- One of them have a dog which runs away in the park and straight into the arms of the other. (Dog, or nephew if you will.)

- Bilbo moves into a new apartment only to realise that the next door neighbour is incredibly gorgeous and oh noes, likes to stand on the balcony half naked.

- Thorin is a music teacher and Bilbo is finally going to learn to play the piano since the plan is to surprise Prim at her wedding to Drogo and play her favourite song. Thorin manages to get the wrong idea and thinks Bilbo is marrying Prim.

- It’s New Years Eve 1999. They’re both at the same party as they both know Bofur and when the clock strikes midnight they happened to be standing next to each other. Kiss or not to kiss?

New (?) spin on the harry potter AU for bagginshield

Thorin is the Minister of Magic, Bilbo is the British PM, who has just been elected.

Or wait, maybe Gandalf should be the Minister of Magic? Because that would work better with canon. So Gandalf shows up in Bilbo’s office, things go about as well as it did in canon.

And then that night Bilbo gets some visitors to convince him that he’s not going insane and he ends up going on an adventure? (THE ADVENTURE IS THAT HE FALLS IN LOVE WITH A WIZARD) ((THE WIZARD IS THORIN))

North & South bagginshield AU

Right, so I’ve finally admitted to myself that I’m never going to get around to writing this. 

Have my notes below the cut, in case you have been thinking about something similar and wanna go for it. Use them with my blessing.

I was going to simply title it: East and West, as that’s both a good nod to the original and works really bloody well considering Erebor and the Shire.

Keep reading

Bilbo had always figured that when someone said: “they smile like the sun!” to describe their sweetheart, they meant said smile to be bright and beautiful.
Only now Bilbo has realised that that wasn’t right at all.
Thorin’s rare grins are bright, true, but bright enough to be blinding. And they fill Bilbo with indescribable warmth. And he’s sure that if he had to live his life without them he would wither and die like the flowers in winter.

Thorin smiles like the sun.

I feel Gimli would get a huge crush on Bilbo. Like teen crushing on hot teacher kind of thing. Blushing and mumbling and being all sorts of awkward. Because Bilbo is so heroic and pretty and wow.

Kíli and Fíli have a field day when they find out. (Cue Gimli muttering insults about Elves, ah, little does he know lol)

Gimli’s previous hero crush was probably Thorin, lol, now cast aside for Bilbo. (He’ll live.)

Regardless of if Bilbo figures it out or not (sometimes I really wonder re his observational skills) I think he’d be a good choice for a crush.

He’s nice enough that you’d know he’d never be cruel or mean about it, and it’s not like Gimli expects something considering that B is the royal consort and all, but maybe it’s his first really big crush. One of those you remember years and years later.

Say for example when you’re in Rivendell on a Very Important Meeting, as is Bilbo, and Legolas overhears a mention of it, and that gets the two of them talking and eventually to get with the game a little earlier than in canon. (Yup gigolas is canon)

Maybe something about love and aging. Like how Gimli would have considered it worth it even considering what the age difference and race difference between him and Bilbo would have meant.
Because love makes it worth it.

And then he brushes it off saying that nothing would have happened anyway since he was a child and he leaves Leggy wondering about love and risks and such, so when they both realise they’ve fallen for each other they might have a more reasonable talk about mortality and such.

I’m imagining a scenario where Bilbo does not want to leave the Arkenstone on Thorin’s tomb. Like, the stone has only brought Thorin misery, so why should he spend the rest of eternity having it at his place of rest. So Bilbo does a final bit of burgling and takes the stone with him when he leaves Erebor.

He brings it with him all the way to the Shire, thinking that it’s better the further it gets from Thorin. And then he buries it in the same spot he plants the acorn. 

He’s not entirely sure why he does this, but it’s like, maybe he needs to find it again, and the acorn and Arkenstone are both very much connected to Thorin, two sides of the same coin.

Anyway, the oak grows, and grows and grows, and after maybe five years Bilbo buys a clue and realises that a five year old oak should not actually be that big. It looks more like a ten year old oak. It’s not very tall admittedly, but it’s much sturdier than it should be. 

And the oak continues to grow. And the trunk… the trunk starts to look familiar.

It’s… it can’t be. It seem… If Bilbo didn’t know better he would say that the trunk is beginning to look like Thorin.

He tells himself that he’s imagining things.

(Bilbo is very good at self-delusion, just as a side note.)

One night there’s a terrible thunderstorm. The sky’s split open on lightning bolt after lightning bolt, and Bilbo almost falls out of bed when there’s a sudden and deafening CRACK, just as the world outside his window goes white.

Grabbing his robe Bilbo braves the storm to go outside.

He’s still a fair distance away when he sees that the lightning has indeed hit his tree, and his heart jumps into his throat. The rain is belting down but Bilbo does not turn back, he needs to see how bad the damage is.

Only… what he finds when he reaches the tree is something he never even could have imagined.


“Thorin?” Bilbo gasped, looking at the unconscious naked form of his- of Thorin lying on the grass, just beneath the oak tree with its trunk split open.

What if The Hobbit was a book written by modern!AU (sorta) Bilbo. But he wrote it after coming back from the war, in memory of the people he lost. 

So there would be three (more or less) parallel stories, one in M-E, (only lightly touched upon as we all know this one already) one set during the war, (the main story) and one set after, (which is basically the current time line).

And the things that happens in the Hobbit is things that kinda happened in RL for Bilbo, this is basically his way of making peace with them.

Like the bit with the Trolls were them being captured by enemy soldiers, and Bilbo managing to get them out of the situation. 

The spider thing was just a spider infestation in their tent one night when they had to make camp in a forest, and everyone freaking out about it.

And Ravenhill…. was Ravenhill.

I’m thinking first world war maybe. Or second. First would be a nice homage to Tolkien, but the second would mean that Bilbo might still be alive today, so the current time line would really be the current timeline. Hmm.

But then again, to have it be the first would mean that the war of the Ring wold be WWII, and that’s rather fitting. Hmmmmmm.

Anyway. *plops bunny down in the middle of the table* Here.

anonymous asked:

hnng now i'm just having squishy thoughts about unsuspecting bilbo bedding down near balin to talk and waking up in the morning to dwalin wrapped around him like an octopus and fili and kili snickering and thorin pretending he's not jealous and ugh

*snickers* lol also Dwalin is a really good cuddler.

No hands in inappropriate places, he’s just there to keep you warm and safe and there’s like a really happy feeling radiating from him when he gets to hold someone as he sleeps.

(Balin is sneaky so it might be so that he asked Bilbo to sleep close partially to get a break from the brother cuddles)

Still, Dwalin would still offer up an apology as Bilbo is wriggling away and it would be so genuine and oddly sweet that Bilbo would blurt that he didn’t mind. It was just unexpected.

Cut to Thorin standing some distance away telling himself he’s totally NOT thinking about what cuddling with Bilbo would be like.

How about a bagginshield ‘has to marry to inherit’ plot, but with a twist?

Bilbo needs to marry someone to inherit Bag End (which otherwise will got to Lobelia) because Bungo was really that stubborn.

So he asks his best friend Bofur to go along with it, and Bofur has nothing better to do (and was promised free beer) so he’s up for it.

Cue Thorin being the new lawyer handling this case.

So he’s trying to figure out if this is genuine or not (whilst falling in love with Bilbo) and Bilbo is trying to make his relationship with Bofur seem 100% genuine (while falling in love with Thorin) and Bofur is like ??? people come ON

So much UST, so MUCH

So post BoFA we have Bilbo staying in Erebor.
He’s in love with Thorin, who returns the feelings, but they’re a couple of walnuts so they’re still pining.

Cue someone being up to no good and trying to slip Thorin a love potion (wanting the totally awesome and badass King under the mountain to fall in love with you is not a crime but using love potions is).

Bilbo accidentally drinks it tho, and it doesn’t really work as intended with his hobbit body and he passes out. The first person he sees afterwards is Thorin.

Who is then told that it was a love potion by the peep who did it. (Who is most upset at the fail and even more upset when they’re taken away by the guards)

Thorin straight out (heh) asks Bilbo: “Do you love me?”
And Bilbo is really not a good liar so he admits that he does.
Oh woe that is Thorin. His One loves him but it’s not true, not really. Angst angst angst.

Bilbo (rather confused as no one will explain what just happened) is bundled off to Óin who has been ordered to fix this.

While Óin is poking and prodding Bilbo wants an explanation and seeing as he’s no fool Óin eventually susses out that Bilbo was also in love with Thorin yesterday. And the day before that. And two months ago. Etc.
So he tells Bilbo to go and tell Thorin that.

Thorin is like, cautiously hopeful. But when Bilbo goes in for a kiss he backs away because nope, not doing anything like that until it’s 110% certain there’s no magic compelling Bilbo.

Cue a rather grumpy (if understanding) Hobbit needing to wait for final confirmation from… (wait for it) Mirkwood. Because Elves are better with magic than Dwarfs.

Needless to say Thorin is grumpy as well.
But they both show admirable restraint waiting for the Elf to show up and declare Bilbo free of the magics.

And then happy ending and smooches. ^w^

“This is real,” Thorin half said, half asked as he cupped the side of Bilbo’s face.

“Unless you’ve also drunk something you shouldn’t ha-” Bilbo paused. “You’ve not, have you?”

An Elf’s job is never done.