bad woman wouldn't let you have it

who you should fight: hogwarts professor edition
  • dumbledore: i mean, if you want. he'd play along. let you win for a little and then just kind of disappear. it'd be sorta weird
  • mcgonagall: no????? don't do it??????? why was this even an option???????????????
  • flitwick: you could, but then you'd be the asshole who should pick on someone their own size
  • quirrel: no wtf poor guy's got it bad enough as it is
  • lockhart: 11/10 would recommend. break his nose!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you're practically guaranteed to win
  • lupin: what kind of asshole are you??????????? don't fight him, hug him. bring him some chocolate. poor baby
  • moody/Barty crouch jr: he deserves it, but he'd probably kill you so stay 1847389282 feet away
  • umbridge: stay the FUCK away from this woman no matter how much you want to fight her (AND YOULL REALLY WANT TO FIGHT HER) do not even get close DO NOT ENGAGE
  • binns: fight the fuck out of him, if that's even possible considering he's already dead. whatever. do it anyway. maybe it'll make history of magic interesting
  • coach hooch: why??? why are you considering this???? have you seen her arm muscles???
  • slughorn: fight him!!!!! fight fight fight!!!!! but then like apologize while he cries when it's over because he feels useless or something.... on second thought, don't fight him. just bring him some fire whiskey and let him cry himself to sleep
  • hagrid: don't you DARE fight him i'll personally murder you. but, like, if you do, you probably wouldn't live to tell the tale
  • trelawney: why would you want to fight this poor little woman doesn't she already have it bad enough???? what kind of asshole???
  • snape: FIGHT HIM. 1748832/10 WOULD ENCOURAGE FIGHT HIM EVEN IF HE KILLS YOU COME BACK AS A GHOST AND KEEP FIGHTING HIM DON'T EVER STOP EVER