bad jokes

Did someone say, shitpost?

Woodward: What do you call a newborn Cavendish?

Diana: *sighs* Enlighten me.

Woodward: Banana Bread! Because she’s no longer a bun in the oven!

Akko: *snickering* Woods, that was awful, even by my standards!

Diana: By the Nine, I need to keep Bernadette safe from you two.

Amanda: Why is your family tree like a goddamn breakfast menu?

Sucy: Seriously, we all have diabetes now from the sheer amount of sugar related nicknames being thrown around.

Hannah: Pray for Diana. We all know Akko is going to teach Bernadette how to drive Diana crazy.

Akko: Of course, right baby?

Bernadette: *happy gibberish*

Diana: ….

Diana: You never call me ‘baby’.

Lotte: You two are…something else.

But at least their happy. Mostly.

Adventures of a DnD group.

Your Druid is sneaking through the camp site and a few soldiers start walking towards her general direction.

Druid: Uhh, I turn into a tree.

DM: The camp you’re sneaking through is in the middle of an open field.

Druid: Shit. I’ll turn into a tree anyway.

Soldier: Hey, has that tree always been there?

Druid: I’ve been here for weeks.

DM: Roll to bluff.

Druid: Nat 20

Soldier: Well the tree would know better than us I suppose.