🐺- Would your muse consider themselves a lone wolf or a social butterfly? - Considering Wellson/Kestrel's past, did he then, and does he now consider himself to be sociable, even as he pushes everyone (with few exceptions) away from him? While he does not seem to have trouble speaking easily with others, he almost definitely has trouble sharing very much beyond superficial or informative conversation as opposed to personal conversation.
You’re spot-on: he does not truly express the way he feels about pretty much anything whose qualities are not absolute. We know that he views the Old Gods as bad, that he supports equitability in education across the socio-economic and gender divides, that he cares about what happens the orphans after they’ve been turned out by the system, &c. But even then his motivations are largely unknown.
I think it can be frustrating for some people to interact with him. Like Osprey had told Lark last evening… some people wear their hearts on their sleeves and live open, social lives, often to their detriment. Wellson/Kestrel believes the converse of that situation holds true, as well – i.e., those who do not wear their hearts on their sleeves can live a sustainable life with minimal risk.
This (^ ^ ^) is why both Osprey and Wellson/Kestrel backed away from the object Blackbay had found last evening. To approach an object placing their comrades under duress, to make an attempt to wrestle the
naïve strong-willed girl away… that’s folly. That is, through their refusal to engage, they protected their own self-interests, and thus maximized their chances for survival. In essence, each of our interactions with the object last night was a microcosm of every individuals’ inner dialogue:
- Lark “Can I Poke It” the Botanist;
- Swan “I Will Kill All of You” the Expedition Leader;
- Albatross “I Hate Myself” the Pious;
- Osprey “I Will Put You Down” the Soldier; and,
- Kestrel “Chucks Deuces” the Thinker
* * *
Considering the last time he was sociable, he was ‘assassinated’ – that he was a victim of circumstance is unknown to him – the likelihood of altering this part of his psyche is close to nil. The same goes for Osprey, though this quality is far more ingrained and established in her character. Wellson/Kestrel’s aversion to personal relationships keeps his survival chances high; as he sees it, the more one cares, the more likely they are to risk their own integrity.
Looks like Lark’s going to be unrequited for a long, long time.
Thank you for the ask (and the attention you’ve paid to our interactions)!
(( @sarastarbreeze ))