bad bullet

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save him

also my commissions are open, if you’d for whatever reason be interested :’)

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my daily to-do lists are shorter this summer because i’m working full time, so i’m experimenting with spreads a little. last week’s was “3 things i’m proud i accomplished each day.”

Cute Things To Put In Your Bullet Journal

  •  Actual bullets
  • Drawings of bullets
  • Your hit list
  • The blood of your enemies (Apply to your nails for a chic look which also makes a great alternative for a pen! uwu)
  • Mind Maps
  • The address of your drug dealer
  • Your parent’s birthdays
  • All the things you won’t be doing this year
  • Your crying schedule
  • Self-insert smut fanfiction.
  • Mud
  • The entirety of The Bee Movie script
  • Illustrations for your self-insert smut fanfiction.
  • Cuttings of poisonous plants.
  • Pictures of you smiling creepily.
  • A reminder to look behind you
  • Seriously, look behind you
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[ 3rd February 2017 ] This spread is from 2 weeks ago when I went to planetshakers awakening!! (for like 2 days) I actually only finished this spread last night while watching bungo stray dogs (stayed up till 4am oops) and omg BSD IS SO GOOD!!!!11!!! If you’re looking for an anime to watch I would definitely recommend! I’ve been really liking this colour and I’m buying every stationery that’s available in this colour tbh someone pls stop me before I do. Hope everyone has an amazing February ahead of you!!! 💕💖

pic credits: @cwote

studygram: ohlookimstudying

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BEWARE THE MOON, BEACON OF THE WEREWOLF


Werewolf special-makeup-effects are a 100+ year artform that kicked off with 1913′s The Werewolf. Which is why it really gets under my skin when i see werewolves that are rendered entirely in CGI (e.g. Underworld, Twilight, Howl, etc.) To me, it’s a sign of an incredibly lazy creature-effects department. I honestly hope the love and craft for practical creature design inevitably returns for this genre. 

topaz-rabbit  asked:

You know how Mr Alan Ituriel joked about being Black Hat's dad. Okay, what if that were true, and Mr Ituriel was his dad and raised him since he was a barely sentient eldritch squid baby monster thing. How's that possible if BH is probably really fucking old. Easy Mr Ituriel would be some immortal that one day was like"yep, I'm going to raise this demon. Sounds fun." But he's the most suburban of dads ever, but never tried stifling BH's evil tendencies, he encouraged them even.

(Continued) Like Mr Ituriel has seen his son kill several men, and was just like ‘eh, kids will be kids.’ He is an immortal that gives no fucks. He is one of the few humans BH can say he’s ‘fond’ of (will never say it out loud) The one time he visited his son, because he’s a proud pop pop of his sons success and see how he’s doing because HE NEVER CALLS. So as a slight act of payback, he tells EMBARRASSING stories ‘Remember when your powers started to come in Hattie? You scared yourself silly!’

((I am torn between staying consistent with my personal theories and completely abandoning them for this great hc. So let’s just say I’m gonna be very contradictory with whatever the fuck I post, because oh man Normal Dad Alan Ituriel is a very good idea indeed.))

  • Alan, an immortal demi-human with abnormal morals who lives in the Mexican suburbs, is walking by an alleyway or something when he hears some kind of blood-curdling screech
  • naturally his first instinct is ‘oooh what the fuck is that let’s go find out.’ so he looks in a dumpster, and finds one dead-looking prostitute with some kind of Alien-franchise-esque parasite abomination thing crawling out of her chest cavity. It’s covered in blood, seems to be only made of wriggling black tentacles, and hissing.
  • “Aww, cute! Come on little guy, let’s get you cleaned up.” He kinda scoops him up with a shopping bag; he may be immortal, but fuck touching whatever fluids those are. Alan casually carries his writhing, screaming horrorterror baby home in a yellow plastic bag, and promptly throws it into the tub.
  • (Cue the insane bathtime montage where Alan locks it in the bathroom and sprays it with the showerhead until it’s clean enough to touch. BH tries to “kill” him (his hand) several times. Alan laughs.)
  • Once BH is thoroughly doused, he resembles a drenched eldritch cat, a soggy, angry bundle of wriggling flesh, multiple eyes, and gnashing teeth. He has not stopped trying to bite Alan.
  • Alan grabs him by the “scruff” and he immediately starts fighting back. He puts him in a cage until BH tires himself out from screaming and pounding at the bars. The two just stare at each other for a moment, silently regarding the other.
  • Alan sits in front of it and throws a small piece of raw meat into the cage. BH devours it in seconds. Alan unlocks the cage. BH instantly tries to attack him again. Alan puts him back in the cage. He waits a few minutes for the tantrum to end, then repeats the process.
  • eventually BH realizes he can get more food if he stays still for longer. so he stops fighting back and let’s Alan lure him closer, piece by piece. Eventually Alan has BH practically in his lap, literally eating out of the palm of his hand. With more food in him, he’s calmed down a bit. Alan smiles. Okay, this is pretty cute.
  • Only Alan would find BH eating cute tbh, it’s quite fucking disgusting how much raw meat has been spilled all over the place
  • Eventually BH is sated, becoming sleepy and much more complacent. He bites very, very weakly when Alan picks him up. Alan kind of cradles him like a baby, then pets him like a cat. The tentacles quiver. “Weird.” He thinks that means he likes it? BH falls asleep in Alan’s arms. “Cool.”
  • Fast forward a couple months, when BH exits the “larval stage.” That outer casing of tentacles is basically a cocoon, and BH eats and grows and eats and grows until he goes from small cat-sized to human-toddler sized. Then he stops fucking moving.
  • Alan freaks out thinking that he’s killed his adopted son after poking him with a stick for a day doesn’t do anything. Then, the outer casing splits open. BH re-emerges from his “pupal stage” as a fully-grown juvenile, basically a one-year old child. He looks like a miniature version of his current form, but without the dapper clothes or any teeth, and with two open eyes. Alan literally squeals and hugs him. BH tries to bite him again. Some things never change.
  • From there it’s basically like raising a baby, with a couple more eldritch aspects. BH grows twice as fast as an ordinary human. Alan dresses him in adorable baby clothes, not because he needs them, but because it makes him look “soooooo cuuuuute!!!”
  • BH’s teeth grow in, and Alan has to use metal teething rings when normal plastic doesn’t work. BH’s learns how to walk with Alan holding his hands. BH’s claws grow in and Alan files them down for him so he doesn’t hurt himself.
  • It takes about a month or so for BH to start talking. Normally he makes little eldritch blurbles that would make a human’s bones melt. Alan just repeats normal words that sound vaguely similar. Eventually BH gets the hang of it. (BH always claims that his first word was “evil”, but it’s his and Alan’s closest-kept secret that it was actually “papá”)
  • Black Hat’s powers come in during his “evil puberty.” He wakes up one morning feeling a little odd and… shimmery? It feels like his body isn’t quite there, like he’s almost floating outside of his flesh. Then he looks down, focusing on his arm. It solidifies more, feels less fuzzy. He focuses again, bringing the fuzziness back, and watches as it changes
  • “DAD HOLY FUCK”
  • Alan is kind of nervous as BH demonstrates how he can turn his arm into an actual, functioning snake. He gets even more nervous when BH starts sleep-teleporting. Alan wakes up with BH on the roof, BH in the garden, BH on the floor of his room, and BH a couple streets away. He always manages to find his son though, he just has to hurry before BH wakes up. (The first time Black Hat woke up after a sleep-teleport, he was confused and scared and started ripping dimensional holes trying to get home. Alan found him about a town over, but it had been quite the scare.)
  • Shortly after this, BH’s “edgy” phase started. (“MY NAME IS MR. WUT NOW DAD”) Alan never really tried to talk him out of it, instead just giving him the eldritch version of “The Talk.”
  • “Now I know that lately your body has been going through some… changes, and I know that might be scary. But any, uh, urges you feel are completely natural, and–” “DAD FOR FUCK’S SAKE I KNOW ALREADY, OKAY?? I’ve been murdering people for like, five months now.” “Oh, okay, if you ever need any, protection, or help hiding a body, you know you can always ask–” “GET OUT OF MY FUCKING ROOM!

It’s a great relationship they have. BH moves out a couple years later to start his business, and refuses to call Alan (out of pride? probably??) Alan doesn’t let him get away that easily, and each year he makes several unannounced visits. It almost always results in some kind of one-sided yelling match between the angry Black Hat and his cheerful dad, as his horrified employees listen on…

anonymous asked:

pls i want to hear all bob-kent family headcanons

Didn’t anyone tell you to be careful what you wish for?  Okay, fine, but you asked for it.  Where do I start?

  • Kent and Bob officially first met at some team picnic thing that the Zimmermanns do every year for Jack’s team before the season starts
    • Kent totally played it cool by calling Bob “Mr. Zimm’s Dad”
    • “Son, I’ll have you know that I was Zimms before Jack was Zimms.”
    • Kent just calls him Mr. Z
  • By some twist of fate, the Zimmermanns ended up being Kent’s billet family
    • He would basically pick up all of Bob’s bad habits
      • Walking around the house in his boxers
      • Eating dry cereal from the box
      • Feet on the coffee table
    • Kent laughs at Bob’s jokes, which is a terrible development for Alicia and Jack.
  • Bob taught Kent a few basic cooking tips, like how to hold a knife and how to properly chop an onion
    • Bob tried to teach Kent how to juggle knives, but Alicia put a stop to that pretty quickly
    • Kent still can’t cook, but he as least knows how to add pork, carrots, and celery to some top ramen to give it some “pizzazz”.
    • (That’s Bob’s word.  He keeps trying to make it stick, but it’s just embarrassing for everyone, especially when he does the jazz hands)
  • Kent’s favorite food is Bob’s Lasagna
    • Seriously, he would sell his Stanley Cup Ring for a tray of that shit
    • Bob also makes the best sugar pie on the planet and this is ABSOLUTELY NOT UP FOR DEBATE
  • Bob was the first person Kent came out to.
    • He did it at the end of the season, the day before he was headed back to New York. He figured if things didn’t work out, he could just not come back.
    • Kent seriously thought about quitting because hockey wasn’t for “people like him”.
    • Bob squashed that idea pretty damn fast and gave Kent the biggest, warmest hug he’s ever known. 
    • Kent cried like a baby
    • “So, is there someone on the team you like?” *nudge nudge*
    • Kent wouldn’t know the answer to that for another year.
  • Bad Bob did NOT teach Kent how to drive.  There are a couple of important reasons for this:
    • Bob cannot drive.  Yes, the government gave him a license, but you do not want this man behind the wheel of a 1-ton vehicle.
    • Besides, he was too busy teaching Jack.
    • Alicia teaches Kent how to drive, and this is why Kent can shift gears like he’s 2 Fast 2 Furious.
  • Kent accidentally calls him “Dad” exactly once.
  • The last thing Kent heard from Bob was a voicemail saying, “This is not your fault.”
    • Kent still has this saved on his phone
  • Kent’s watch isn’t new. Bob sent it to him as a gift after the 2009 draft.
    • Engraved on the back, it says: Your Team is Your Family. Family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten
    • (Jack has a matching watch, but he… didn’t keep it)