When Terrans first made contact with the rest of the galaxy, the other advanced beings of the galaxy made a request to study Human history. Purely in the interests of understanding, to be sure. When they got permission, they sent in a group of historian-archivists - with backgrounds in espionage. The best way to learn any civilization’s weakness is, of course, is to study it in depth. The ‘historians’ (spies) are flabbergasted to be given free access to the entire planet’s libraries and an unholy, horrifying, unregulated pit of information, misinformation, and bickering that they call the ‘internet’.
It takes the historians several weeks to realize that the internet and most of the libraries are open to all. Anyone who desires can access the information. ANY OF IT. There are directions on how to build their worst terror weapons, available to any and all who want to bother looking it up, in all their libraries and their ‘internet’. Anyone at all can build them, given the proper materials.
They take a day off to discuss this, then go back to their work.
Terrorism. This is a disturbing concept to the historians.
They have to take a week off when they get to the invasions of Russia. The humans WIPED OUT THEIR OWN SUPPLIES to keep the other side from getting them. The concept of “scorched earth” requires another week off.
They get to Auschwitz, to Hiroshima, to Stalin and Mao and Pol-Pot.
They tell their hosts thank you, as politely as possible. They have learned all they need. They obey any and all diplomatic protocols they have been given, are as polite as they possibly can be. They wish they had more rules to follow, more directives for how to behave so as not to anger or offend.
As soon as they are off-world, they send an alert. Terra is on the Permission Only list, to be visited by invitation or not at all. Humans individually are to be treated with caution and all known good manners. No one is sure what they are capable of and do not want to find out. Their history is full of remarkable individuals in all fields including warfare.
Across the galaxy, human scientists and explorers wonder why all of a sudden, everyone has gotten so NICE. They shrug, and go try to figure out the next interesting thing.
HEYYY if you haven’t noticed my spam on your dashboard I’m back from my trip!! With this!!!! im actually v proud of it
While without wifi I had a ton of time to waste so naturally I reread a bunch of kakavege fics in my dbz fic stash…and I was reading@schlopreceptacle‘s You Buried Meand I legit cried happy tears it was an amazing experience. If you’re into fluff and seeing Vegeta be the sap he not so secretly is, please read it. I just had to draw something for this!
Apparently I can’t stop drawing these two. Have a MariChat sketch inspired by @baneismydragon‘s ridiculously hilarious and adorable fic Cut From The Same Cloth (found here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/9783911) wherein Adrien collects scraps of fabric from his father’s office to gift to Marinette for her project and shenanigans ensue. Go read it, it’s amazing.
Also, since I didn’t bother to sketch a background, because backgrounds are my ultimate weakness, pretend they’re on Marinette’s rooftop balcony and Chat interrupted her as she was about to go to bed. (Yes, it was just an excuse to draw her in cute ladybug pj’s, and also maybe torture Adrien a little, okay. I have no regrets.)
Imagine Voltron in its first fight against Prince Lotor, and Lotor somehow is able to comunicate (maybe he got one of his cronies to hack Voltron’s communication system). So the entire time Voltron is fighting, they hear Lotor making snide comments in the background, like “Is that the best you have?” “My father must have been weak if he couldn’t squash you like the bugs you are.” And it looks like the Galra are going to win, and Voltron is about to lose when Lotor makes a remark about how, after he kills Voltron, earth is next one to go.
And Lance fucking looses it.
Suddenly, enemy ships are being cut and frozen left and right, the number of Galra ships decreasing rapidly. All the while Lance is screaming over the intercom, saying things in English and Spanish alike. But everyone, including Lotor, gets the gist of what he is trying to say:
“Get anywhere near earth and I will fuck you up.”
Lotor never hacked into Voltron’s communication system again.