babytao

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(old vid yes but)

who. the. heck. allowed. the. eyeliners.

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my reaction in a nutshell

“Back to reality” From My Fanfic “The Adventures Of Mama Suho”

Tao (POV)

Gosh I feel like I’m back in the fucking jungle!Everything was so nice and calm yesterday despite mama’s mental break down.But now everyone has gone back to their normal bitchy selves well most of them have.Mama’s still upset and Kai……well Kai’s gone into freaking Terminator mode!

Sehun:Hey buttface!!

Uh this fake ass bitch!!

Tao:Hey shit face!

Sehun:So you never really told us about what you actually did while you were in the jungle

Tao:Well I talked to a monkey but I guess he followed me home because I’m staring him right in the face right now!

Sehun:Hahaha very funny now tell the truth….or did you cry like the whinny little bitch you are

Tao:Wow who crapped in your corn flakes this morning Regina George?

Suddenly Baekhyun walked in!This is just great….this is just fucking awesome!!

Baekhyun:Hey whats going on in here?

Sehun:Oh you know just asking Tao about what all he did while he was in the jungle

Baekhyun:He probably cried like a baby

Tao:No I didn’t !!!

Sehun:Oh really?

Tao:Ye-yea-yeah I t-t-totally didn’t cry

*(Tao has flashback to when he was in the jungle)*

Manager: Tao look you can’t have your phone its the rules so give it up

Tao:B-bu-but thats not fair*Starts to tear up*

Manger:Tao give it to me now!!!

Tao:*Sobs*

*Later during filming*

Manager:So tao I’m going to need you to be careful there’s a bee hive not to far away from here so just be very careful please

Tao:Wait did you just say bee’s?!!!!*Faints*

*2 hours into filming*

Tao:*Running around screaming*

*Later on during filming*

CameraMan:So Tao how are you feeling?

Tao:Like shit!!!!I want my Mama!!*Suddenly grabs the camera*

CameraMan:Hey Give me that!!!

Tao:Mama if your watching this please help!!!!There’s no Gucci or Wifi yet alone signal and I can’t get on my fucking phone!!And I’m pretty sure something’s crawling on my leg!!!*Looks down to see a Spider on his leg*

CameraMan:Tao don’t panic!Tao stay calm!Tao don’t!Tao Don-

Tao:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*runs away crying*

CameraMan:Should we go get him?

Manager:Don’t worry he’ll get tired

Tao:*Accidently runs into a tree knocking himself out*

*(End of Flashback)*

Baekhyun:Um…T-Tao?

Tao:Hmm?

Sehun:You okay?

Tao:*Giggles*Peachy

Kyungsoo(POV)

Gosh I’m so fucking hungry!You can’t plan world domination on a empty stomach

Kyungsoo:Ah Chanyeol can you come here for a minute

Chanyeol:What the fuck do you want?!

Kyungsoo:Hey should I add another day to your punishment!!

Chanyeol:Just tell me what you want

Kyungsoo:I want for you to go make me a sandwhich

Chanyeol:Wait so you’re trusting me to make you a sandwhich after you just threatened me?

Kyungsoo:You know what I can make it myself

As I was walking towards the kitchen I couldn’t help but stop and stare at Kai

Kai:*Throwing darts at a picture of Kris*

Wow he’s so cute when he’s evil

Kai:When I find you I’m going to murder you *Throws another dart*

Oh look at those muscles!And he’s all sweaty yum yum!!

Kai:I’m going break your fucking face for breaking mama’s heart *Throws multiple darts*

Oh no keep your self together Kyungsoo!!!Remeber you were going to make a sandwhich

Kai*Walks towards the mirror*Damn I look good

Luhan(POV)

Ever since Tao got back Xiumin has been all over him!I mean he’s injured but he’s not a fucking baby!!

Xiumin:Tao do you need anything?

Tao:No but maybe some hugs and kisses would be nice

Xiumin:Sure anything for you *Sits on Tao’s lap and hugs him while kissing his forehead*

Luhan:*Dying inside*

Tao:*Enjoying all of xiumin’s love and cuddles*

Uh how dare you try to steal my man but its okay I got something for you Tao

Xiumin:*Still sitting on Tao’s Lap*

Just act natural Luhan

Tao:Ahhh just caught a cramp in my neck

Xiumin:Aww you poor thing let me kiss it better

Tao:Hey xium-xium

Xium-Xium?What kind of nickname is that?!

Xiumin:Yes?

Tao:Can you go get me some fresh ice for my foot?

Xiumin:Sure anything for you *Walks downstairs to go to the kitchen*

Luhan:So its just me and you

Tao:Yeah I guess *Smiles*

This bitch!

Luhan:Xiumin really cares about you huh?

Tao:Yeah he really does

Thats it time to take matters into  my own hands

Luhan:*Grabs Tao’s Wheelchair*

Tao:Umm w-what are you doing luhan?

Luhan:What I should’ve done a long time ago *Pushes Tao’s wheelchair towards the staircase and watches him fall down the stairs*

Now I have to go hide the evidence that it was me

Luhan:*Picks up Tao and his wheelchair and throws them in the closet*

Baekhyun:Luhan!What did you just do?!

Luhan:*Picks up a bottle and throws it at Baekhyun’s face*

Baekhyun: Owwwww!

Luhan:You didn’t see shit!!

Baekhyun:*tries to run away but gets shoved in the closet with by luhan*

Luhan: Another Hoe out the way *walks back up stairs and sits down acting all innocent*

Xiumin:*Comes back in the room with some ice*Sorry I took so long Tao-Tao?Hey where did tao go?

Just deny deny deny…..

(Meanwhile in the closet)

Tao:*Crying*I think I broke my foot!

Baekhyun: Aish Luhan is fucking crazy!!

Tao:I’m scared hold me *pushes up against baekhyun*

Baekhyun:Ow Tao get off of me!

Suddenly the closet door flies open and baekhyun and tao fall out  onto the floor

Xiumin:*In shock*

Luhan:Oh shit

Baekhyun:*Jumps up and yells*Freedom!

Tao:*Struggling to get up*Um baekhyun help me

Baekhyun: Haha no bye bitches *walks away*

Luhan:*Glares at Tao*

Kyungsoo:Tao!!What happened oh you poor thing!!!*Helps Tao*

Xiumin:*Turns to luhan*How many times do I have to tell you that you can’t try to kill every guy that I talk to?!

Luhan:But you’re mine and only mine

Luhan:*Points towards Tao*Oh this shit isn’t over!

Tao:Ha bitch you can’t do shit to me now that I got my bitch kyungsoo with me

Baekhyun: Um just so you know I got attacked by Luhan too just saying kay bye *walks out of the room*

Xiumin:*Points to Luhan*You disgust me

Yep he totally wants me!!