aye i had fun doing this

2

‘…and through fusion, we make lavender chalcedony! Prepare yourself for the Spear Spitting Star Shooting Big Giant Ass Harpoon Gun… of Doom!!

The name of their gun is a work in progress and it really doesn’t look all that doom like,,, but g o d I loved these two designs so I drew them and got carried away and drew the fusion too. Oops?

Reyes protects McCree from a spider, but in an interesting fashion-
  • Reyes: Ay, niño! Bring me my gun!
  • McCree: Fine. But, uh, we're in the base. What do you-
  • Reyes: *shoots into the air about an inch away from McCree's face*
  • McCree: POPS WHAT THE FUCK-
  • Reyes: I saw a spider dangling from your hat, pendejo. I had to kill it for you.
  • McCree: .... You coulda just fuckin' grabbED IT-
  • Reyes: Eh, maybe. But that wouldn't have been any fun, now would it~?
Embarrassed **DLuh Imagine**

Tonight was the night of Skate’s birthday party. You and Derek were really excited to go the party. You were dressed in a maroon,lace top with black ripped jeans. Arriving to the party,you could tell that it was going to be lit.

“Aye Juiceman happy birthday bro.” Derek says.

“Thanks man. Lil ma you look good.”

“Thanks you birthday boy.” You say laughing.

“Are y'all gonna do that all night?”

“You know it.” Derek says,as he pulls me away to get some drinks.

Throughout the night, you and Derek had a lot of fun. It felt great to have all of your favorite friends in one room. Close to the end of the night, Derek kept checking his phone as if he was waiting for someone.

“Babe you good?” You say placing your hand on his chest.

“Yeah I’m just gonna step out really quick.”

“Alright hurry back I wanna take Jell-O shots.”

Derek chuckled at you and then walk outside. After maybe five minutes, you hear a huge commotion outside. Everyone began to rush outside to see what was going on. When you get outside, you see Nate holding back Derek.

“Yo what the hell just happened?” You says beginning to worry.

“I TOLD HIM TO KEEP HIS MOUTH SHUT NATE. HE MUST’VE THOUGHT I WAS PLAYING.” Derek kept yelling as Nate was pushing him back.

“Umm…DEREK JAMES LUH ANSWER NOW.” You say getting angry.

“I just punched P in the face. I’m tired of him always talking crap about me.”

You weren’t shocked that Derek punched P, he does run his mouth a lot. But what made you mad was his timing. We all came to celebrate Nate, not to be petty and fight.

“Yo, you have to be kidding me…really D?”

“What do you mean "really” ? I’m a grown man I’m not gonna have him talk about me like I’m a little boy.“

"Wow I didn’t know your ego was that important. Out of all times you decide to address him it’s at Nate’s party. I’m so embarrassed at this point, I can barely look at you right now.”

“What do you mean embarrassed y/n?”

“YOU HAVE A TEMPER YOU CAN’T CONTROL DEREK. THAT’S WHAT I MEAN BY EMBARRASSED. ”

Derek stood there and looked at you with a blank expression on his face.

“Look D I love you and I’m gonna stand by you, no matter what. But, tonight you were wrong for what you did. So I need for you to go and apologize to Nate like….NOW, or you’re sleeping on the couch for the rest of the month.”

“I love you too mami. You’re right I shouldn’t have done that tonight, and I am going to apologize to Nate. I can’t imagine not cuddling you at night. I am truly sorry.”

“Don’t tell me , tell Nate. And please hurry I am really tired.”

“Alright babygirl gimme a sec. ”

“Hurry sexy” you say smacking his butt.

You truly did love Derek, even when he was wrong. He was yours and you were his…always.

youtube

Look a new video :OO

3

Ahahaha! On an art role, I am. I’m mainly working on the HC book that’s ALMOST FUCKING FINISHED AW HELL YEAH, Bronycon prints, and commissions. But in between I like doing stuff for the hell of it, and this of course includes my series of headcanon sketchdumps! So, as per usual, here’s another one, this time of the Satyr. :3 I had tons of fun drawing this creature, so much so I’m surprised I didn’t draw more of them for the sketchdump. I probably will add a few later, but for now this will suffice.

So yeah. Let’s just go ahead and jump right into the headcanon, aye?

——
The Satyr is a part of of the Taurus family, the classification of the creatures that are seemingly half-primate/half-ungulate. This includes the Faun, the Centaur, and the Minotaur as well. The Satyr is more related to the Minotaur in terms of looks, and look like a cross between a goat or sheep and a monkey.

———

Appearance:
The Satyr is the smallest of the Taurus species, typically coming in at around 5ft tall for both sexes. Like all Taurus, they have long, powerful arms with fingers tipped with strong, sharp claws. They are leaner than the other Taurus species, but don’t let their small stature fool you. They are deceptively strong for their size, however their truth strength lies in just how nimble, agile, and fast they are, both on land and in the trees. Their tails are long and powerful, strong enough to support the entire weight of their body, and are prehensile; they act as a fifth extra limb to the Satyr, similar to that of a tree-dwelling monkey. Depending on the breed of Satyr, the creature’s coat can either be short and straight like a goat’s, or thick and curly like a sheep’s. Both sexes grow horns and the females do not have prominent breasts unless nursing young. Both sexes harbor long and sharp canines. The Satyr is both bipedal and quadrupedal, however Satyrs do favor running on all four, and moving around in the trees on all four.


Diet:
Like their relatives in the Taurus family, the Satyr is omnivorous. However, they favor fruits, vegetables, and poultry over red meat. Due to the Satyr often taking to the trees, their favorite sort of poultry is often the type that can fly, especially pheasants, geese, and grouse. They love chicken too, though. Their hunting method often revolves around them stalking their prey similarly to a cat, and when the bird tries to fly they spring high into the air to catch it. The Satyr has an amazing vertical jump, able to leap more than 8 feet in the air without any prior running start. They almost always land on their feet, too.
Another hunting trick they like to utilize is ambush from the trees, which literally has them simply dropping from their perch and pouncing their prey of choice. This method is often used for bigger prey.

Breeding:
Of the species of Taurus, next to the Minotaur the Satyr is possibly the most dedicated when it comes to marriage and earning a mate. They’re also the most romantic. It’s common for courting satyrs to go out of their way and plan surprise after surprise for their mates, such as take them to secluded meadows with beautiful views of the lands, their favorite tree where the best foraging roots are grown, go out and hunt a special sort of bird or fish just for their mate’s meal, and so on. Minotaurs are known for being among the lowest of the divorce rate, but Satyrs are probably the species that has THE lowest divorce rate of all sapient species. That’d be impressive in itself, but Satyrs also are rated to be a species with one of the highest “genuinely happy” marriages. This is mostly because Satyrs aren’t necessarily looking for nothing but sex or a short fling. When searching for a mate, they look for someone they can be best friends with, then once they are best friends only then will they consider going on to be a couple. If a particular couple doesn’t work out, more often than not the Satyrs involved will remain good friends with one another. Basically, communication is among the Satyrs best traits.

A doe (or satyress) will typically have only one or two cubs at a time. The baby satyr can be referred to as “calf”, “cub”, “infant”, or “child”, and are born tiny, fluffy, defenseless, and unable to walk. Like the minotaur calf, however, they’re born strong enough to grip onto their parents’ fur so, if the parent has to, they can have their child upon their backs or to their chest without fear of them falling. That said, satyr parents will always use supports for their cub to make sure they really don’t fall off when they aren’t actively holding them.

Behavior:
The Satyr prefer to stay in one territory that have a vast amount of trees surrounding them. As such, villages, towns, and cities designed by satyrs are the stuff of legend, in which homes and populations are often built IN the trees and suspended in air (I’ll eventually draw what they tend to look like). Due this, their architecture and ancient ruins are often sought-after hot-spots for tourists. They are native to the small country of Taurus, but like all sapient species they’ve branched out to the entire world. The country, like Zebrica, is very tribe-like in orientation (in which there are many different tribes in the same country), however their government works somewhat like an oligarchy:

There is a “council” of sorts (referred to as the Council of the Holds) that is composed the leader and most trusted shaman/elder/representative of each individual “Hold” in Taurus (there are 15 holds in total). Each hold is under the rule of the Alpha (basically a king/queen/president) of Taurus, whom of which could be referred to as the “High Chief” of the country. The requirements to become the High Chief is that the Taur in question must be an experienced warrior and hunter, and must be at least 30 years old or older; the race of the Taur does not matter. Political experience isn’t necessarily needed to try to become the High Chief of Taurus, however it is preferred by those in the seats of the council.

Every four years, there is a huge, country-wide tournament held for those who wish to challenge the current Alpha for his/her seat as the High Chief. Only the best of the best will be able to get into said tournament, so in the year before the fourth year of a High Chief’s rule, there is are hold-local tournaments held, in which each Hold has their own competition to determine who will go to challenge the High Chief. These tournaments will determine the candidates’ hunting and battle skill, their ability to adapt, their ability to lead, and whether or not they follow the Code of Honor. Each hold’s tournament will send out two candidates (the winner of the tourney and the 2nd placer winner). This gives the final tournament 30 participates.

Once the candidates for the 4th Year Tourney has been chosen, they will train for the remainder of the time up until the final High Chief tournament begins. Once said tourney rolls around , 30 candidates will battle each other until there is only one who makes it to the final round. That round involves fighting the High Chief himself/herself. Whomever wins the duel will then be nominated High Chief of Taurus.

However, in the event that the current High Chief is less than satisfactory, those of the Council of the Holds are welcomed to challenge the High Chief to a duel for the title.
———-

Aaaaand there ya go! Now with the Taurus species out of the way (I’ll probably come back with a mash-up sketchdump to show off different breeds of each species) I’ll be moving on to other ones, such as the much-asked-for dragons and another one I came up with recently, the Crystal Cats, a sapient race similar to Diamond Dogs only they’re feline. c: And of course other species as well. But ANYWAY. As always, feel free to ask any questions if you guys have any!  ^.^

Brace Yourself, Bite Your Lips

read on ao3

title from I Slept With Someone From Fall Out Boy And All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me by Fall Out Boy (fob needs to chill)

Genre: Smut (college au, blow jobs, hand jobs, some body worship if you squint

Word Count: 2112

Warnings: swearing and use of alcohol

Side Note: i am so sorry i should’ve had this up like a week sooner i don’t even have a good excuse but i am v sorry. more smut (dirty talk ay) when i get back from visiting family next week

Keep reading

@omgturtlesoup asked: hello, i just read ur story that started w claire waxing abt xmas stockings. i wonder if i can req a wee drabble abt jamie knitting a xmas stocking during the winter for jc’s first grandchild jemmy’s first xmas. TY xox

Stocking drabble! I love it! Thanks for the ask! This was a lot of fun to do for sure. Hope you enjoy it!


I looked through our food stores, thinking about what we could do to have a nice proper Christmas feast. Or as much of a feast as we could. A strange clicking drew my attention. I followed the noise into Jamie’s study and stopped short. He sat in his chair with the knitting needles Jokasta had given me making a little red stocking.

“What are you making?”

“A stocking,” he said without looking up.

“Only the one? It’s awfully small.”

“Aye. It’s for wee Jem.”

“Is it? I thought he had two feet. Has he misplaced the other?”

Two perfectly blue eyes glared up from under bushy red brows. He meant it to be a little menacing, but I’d seen him truly menacing before. This just ended up being endearing.

“No, Sassencach. He has not. At least not since I saw him last.”

“Then why the one?”

“Did ye no’ tell me once that ye hung stockings up for Yuletide?”

My throat closed a little.

“That was a very long time ago.”

“Aye. But I ken Breeanah liked to put hers up in your time, did she no?”

“Yes. She did. I used to put sweets and little toys in it for her to surprise her on Christmas morning.”

“Wheel. There’s no’ much to put in a wee stocking, but he’ll have a stocking at least.”

Moving to him, I put my arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. The needles kept clicking rhythmically.

“You’re a very sweet man, James Fraser.”