aye aye captain

based on this for @vermundr because the crack keeps on coming [ x ]

-Aifread pops out-

ARE YOU READY KIDS?
AYE AYE CAPTAIN!
I CAN’T HEAR YOU!
AYE AYE CAPTAIN

OOOOOOOHHHH

WHO LIVES IN A SHIP THAT SAILS ALL OVER THE SEA?
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE!
UNLUCKY AND (HAIR) YELLOW AND PERVERSE IS HE
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE!
IF NAUTICAL TROUBLE BE SOMETHING YOU WISH
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE!
THEN DROP ON THE DECK AND FLOP LIKE A DRUNK FISH
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE
EIZEN THE FILTHY PIRATE

EIIZEEEEN THE FILTHY PIRAAAAATE!

-Aifread laughing in the distance-

Acting Captain’s log, Stardate 4523.3. 

I dinnae know why the captain returned with a ripped shirt while the rest of the away team look perfectly fine. They landed on Tribble Planet. There’s nothin’ but Tribbles there. Doctor McCoy looks mighty peeved and Mr. Spock hasn’t spoken since their return. The Captain looks pleased with himself. Why am I still on this ship. Help.

DUDE!!!LIKE......

 I’m the only one who doesnt give a damn that the musical episode and the wedding is the same thing??

CAPTAIN SWAN IS GETTING MARRIED  

SHE IS GONNA BE EMMA JONES (if she wants) 

SHE IS GONNA WEAR A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING GOWN MAYBE A FLOWER CROWN (MADE BY JMO HERSELF) 

AND SHE AND KILLIAN ARE GONNA SING A SONG LIKE THE DISNEY MOVIES.

Who's a Pretty Boy?
  • It's a slow day at the fancy dress store. Levi is about to take a tea break when the doorbell chimes.
  • Its Eren. Again.
  • And damn, he looks hot today. Windswept suits his brunette hair. Those sea green eyes crease at the corner as he spots Levi and smiles.
  • It occurs to him that Eren sure goes to a lot of parties. Wasn't he in here only last week?
  • ...
  • Eren: (emerges from the changing room in a pirate costume. Takes a spin.) So, how do I look?
  • Levi: Ridiculous, as always.
  • Eren: Great! Is the parrot too much? (the parrot in question is huge and perched precariously upon a captain's hat)
  • Levi: *shrug* You'll lose it within 5 minutes. Go with something smaller.
  • Eren: Aye-aye, Captain. (places his captain's hat on Levi's head)
  • Levi: (huffs) I'm not a hat stand!
  • Eren: You know, it actually suits you. The hat, not the parrot.
  • Levi: Yeah right.
  • Eren: It does! (blurts) You should come to the party!
  • Levi: Yeah?
  • Eren: Shi... (realises his grave mistake as there is no party, he only popped in today in case Levi was here and now, oh god) Wait. Uhm. (unsteady) I mean, it might not be your thing.
  • Levi: (removes the hat from his head) You're right.
  • Eren: Good. OK-
  • Levi: Non-existent parties are definitely not my thing.
  • Eren: (jaw drops)
  • Levi: Going to get a drink with you, however... that just may be.

I’M SO MAD THO BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING

LIKE WE’RE GONNA’ GET REALLY ATTACHED TO NOE AND FRIGGIN’ VANITAS AND OF COURSE THE SHIPS WILL SAIL

AND I’M FRIGGIN’ WILLING TO BET MY HAT ON A SCENE SOMEWHERE TOWARDS THE END WHERE ONE OF THESE ASSHOLES CALLS THE OTHER BY THEIR “TRUE NAME” AND MAKES ME FLING MYSELF OFF A TRAMPOLINE AND INTO THE ASTEROID BELT

AND OH GOOD LOOKS LIKE WE KNOW FROM THE BEGINNING THAT NOE’S GONNA’ KILL VANITAS,

VERY POSSIBLY WHILE VANITAS REASSURES HIM WITH WORDS LIKE “DON’T WORRY, I WON’T DIE…EVEN IF I’M NO LONGER HERE” OR WHATEVER THE FUCK,

LIKE F U C K THE NEXT 100+ MONTHS OF MY LIFE

TRUST FALL INTO A PILE OF PITCHFORKS 1 2 3 GO

Age of Ultron Deleted Scene

Tony: Maybe I should take a page out Barton’s book. Build Pepper a farm. Hope nobody blows it up. 

Steve: Then you probably shouldn’t give out your address to super-villains through TMZ reporters again.

Tony: …

Steve: … I mean I’ll miss you.