axis 2p

anonymous asked:

How would 2p axis react to seeing their s/o wearing a lingerie colored by the colors of their flag? (For example green white red colored lingerie)

2p Germany: *bursts into laughter and shakes his head* “Oktoberfest would’ve been a better pick! My colors look like ass!”
Lutz would laugh at first, but don’t take that to mean he isn’t turned on. He is. Majorly. Though he would be the first to say that his colors aren’t the most flattering…or sexy. He would slide them the idea of Oktoberfest, but he wouldn’t wait too long before jumping on his s/o. Talking is boring and they look at as fuck, so why wouldn’t he pounce?

2p Italy: *sighs quietly and rolls his eyes* “You’re body looks better nude~…just letting you know…”
Luciano is a proud Italian, so he would rather appreciate the beauty of his s/o’s natural body than seeing some lingerie on them…especially if it his flag that is being turned into lingerie. He would appreciate the gesture, but he would make sure that lingerie doesn’t survive the night…even if that means going longer and rougher than he intended. But Luciano isn’t complaining. 

2p Japan: *raises eyebrow* “How and why?”
Kuro would just raise an eyebrow and shake his head. White lingerie, fine. But white with a red circle? That never looks good. Unless it is Twister, no one should have giant colored dots on their crotch…or ass… He would sigh and look at his s/o with those eyes of “change or I won’t touch you.” Though as soon as they got out of that lingerie and tossed it, he would be all over them. He won’t deny a feast on a silver platter…

Things only in Hetalia

• An entire religion based on a character.

• Hetaoni and Dreamtalia.

• Gutters and Danish Slaughterhouse

• 23.5

• Being able to trigger an entire fandom at the mention of Davey, Pineapples, and Jeanne D'arc

• 5 minute episodes, 4 seasons.

• Russia’s hands.

• 2p Hetalia

• The elusive 3p Hetalia

• Fucking micronations

• Direct 3rd wall breaking like in the office

• Gay Countries™

• Every Hetalian suddenly knows how to perfectly cook pasta

• Vocaloids made for the characters in Hetalia; Hetaloids

• All Hetalians know at least bits and pieces of several other languages OTHER than Japanese like other weeaboos; Examples include German, any Nordic language, French, Italian, and Spanish (All of which I can say bits and pieces of)

• Ace-ing history class

• Asking your history teacher what Prussia is, and where Liechtenstein is, and if Sealand is considered a country

• Everyone can voice act well or do at least one good or great impression of a character

• Being able to name more countries off the top of your head than anyone else

• Dark Lord Hima

• Studio Dean Animation

2p's as april fools pranks

2p america: air horn. (96% evil)

 2p canada: kraft dinner as orange juice. (88% evil)

 2p england: mayonnaise as toothpaste. (10% evil)

 2p france: personal lubricant instead of hand sanitizer. (50% evil)

 2p russia: cups of water. (40% evil)

 2p china: soy sauce instead of coke. (99% evil)

 2p italy: key board garden. (60% evil)

 2p germany: play-doh as gum.  (80% evil)

 2p japan: switch out the chocolate chip bread for the cinnamon raisin flavor. (101% evil do not do this unless you’re tired of having friends)

2ps as shit I've done at school
  • 2p!America (Allen Jones): told the French teacher to fuck off because she's been rude before storming out of the class (he dropped the class and joined another class which he wasn't there for the beginning of the year to learn about safety so he got 100s for doing no work because the teacher did everything for him)
  • 2p!Canada (James Williams): said the most sarcastic and low-key rude comments loud af but never got in trouble
  • 2p!France (François Bonnefoy): joked about suicide and dying so much the school did a suicide check on him
  • 2p!England (Oliver Kirkland): got out of school early for no other reason than to go home and bake
  • 2p!China (Zao Wang): asked his best friend to bring him weed (they ended up hanging out and smoking instead)
  • 2p!Russia (Viktor Braginsky): got a 105/100 on an assignment
  • 2p!Italy Veneziano (Luciano Vargas): got caught on a porn site while looking for memes
  • 2p!Italy Romano (Flavio Vargas): filed his nails during class without getting caught. Finger and toenails.
  • 2p!Germany (Lutz Beilschmidt): ran down the world language hall screaming "choke me daddy" in various languages
  • 2p!Prussia (Gilen Beilschmidt): always watched over the school hamsters whenever there was a break
  • 2p!Japan (Kuro Honda): used his phone for the whole class and got every question right
  • 2p!Austria (Roland Edelstein): brought in a book about witchcraft and showed it to his extremely Christian teacher
2p’s react to s/o bursting into a room and asks to feel their freshly shaved legs

2p america: HOLY FU- , damn soft as a baby bottom.

2p canada: no I DoNNT WANT TO FEEL YOUR DAMn le- this feels nice.

2p england: Splendid! How did you get them so soft poppet?

2p france: *looks bored* nice. *silently to himself* mon dieu.

2p china: Kittin, any place else I have to feel hmm? ;)

2p russia: Yes very nice, now shoo, i need to work.

2p italy: CHE CAZZO RAGAZZA WHY THE HELL YOU BURS- mio dio *keeps petting your leg without saying anything*

2p germany: SCHEISSE- ohh. Might wanna wrap those legs around me so we both can enjoy them?

2p japan: *monotone voice* nice.

2p prussia: s-soft as a baby bird.

2p lovino: What cream did you use darling? The new one I bought you?

2ps as Insults

2p Italy: I’d slap you but that would be animal abuse.

2p Germany: Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, third one’s for you.

2p Japan: You’ve mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.

2p Romano: I’m busy. You’re ugly. Have a nice day.

2p Spain: The smartass in me really doesn’t like the dumbass in you.

2p Prussia: You fear success, but really have nothing to worry about.

2p America: 100,000 sperm and you were the fastest?

2p England: You’ll never be the man your mother is!

2p France: You’re as useless as a knitted condom.

2p Russia: Shock me - say something intelligent.

2p China: You’re so fake you look like you were made in China.

2p Canada: Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.

(No these are not mine but I am more than happy to use these.)

Cinnamon rolls

Looks like a cinnamon roll but can actually kick your ass: 2p England, 2p Romano,

Looks like they can kick your ass is actually a cinnamon roll: 2p Germany, 2p America, 2p Canada,
2p Russia

Looks like a cinnamon roll and is a cinnamon roll: 2p Prussia, 2p China

Looks like they can kick your ass and can kick your ass: 2p France, 2p Italy, 2p Japan

The 2ps as shit said at my lunch table

2p America: “According to all known laws of aviation-”

2p China: With a heavy Taiwanese accent: “…. Shiiiitttttttt”

2p England: “OH FUGGERNUT I DROPPED MY SANDWICH” this friend won’t swear it’s so funny 

2p France: “Mangez mon cul.” //dabs

2p Russia: “Swearing is gross which is why I don’t swear now shut the fuck up and let me eat.”

2p Canada: “I forgot the word… À la papetaria or some shit like that I don’t know I don’t speak French.”

2p Italy: “pasSA LA PASTA” //queue laughing at it for like 5 minutes

2p Germany: “Okay but honestly the German tree on duolingo can eat my ass.”

2p Japan: “I vape straight up yaoi.”

2p Romano: “Mom yelled at me when I said I’d wear Gucci to grandma’s funeral.”

2p Austria: “Ah yes I see now. Your palm says that you’re a little bitch.”

2p Prussia: “Ah yes, only one more day until I livestream my suicide.”

anonymous asked:

All of their reactions to finding their soulmates? (Like that one prompt that goes around with the glowing heart image)

2p america: blood goes south, gets hot, can’t think of something else

2p canada: stares, blushes, gets clumsy

2p england: stutters, BLUSHESS, rattles

2p france: [hisses] what is this new feeling.

2p russia: i’m sick? Searches symptons on google.

2p china: makes lame jokes, rattles, blood goes anywhere but his head. (;))


2p germany: (see 2p america)

2p japan: gets funny feeling in stomach, thinks he ate something bad


2p lovino: flirting, speaks louder, shows off
Good Girl
  • Word Count: 552
  • Characters: 2p Canada x Overweight Reader
  • Theme: DD/LG, Daddy Kink, NSFW

You feel tears clouding your eyes as you feel your papa grab the back of you head, pushing his length deeper into your throat. “That’s a good girl, take it all!” Matt growled as he tightened his grip on your hair, earning a delicious whimper from your lips. He chuckles as he begins to pump in and out of your mouth, coating his shaft with spit and saliva. You gag as you feel him hit the back of your throat repeatedly. 

“Such a good girl, letting papa fuck your tight throat” Matt grins as he watched his cock slide in and out of your mouth, almost memorized by the motions. He then holds your head still with his large hands, “Such a dirty little girl, I bet your pussy is dripping, huh?” You look up to him with pleading eyes with eyes clouded with lust and tears, causing him to grin.

He pulls out of your throats, studying your body. “P-papa?” you whimper as you look up to his tall stature.

You chubby body as you sit on your knees, with your thick thighs on display and legs tucked tightly under your round ass. Your thighs pressed tightly together to stop your juices from flowing down your legs and onto the floor. Trails of saliva and spit running down your chin and at the corners of your mouth, while your eyes plead with desperation for yet another throat fucking. How could he deny his princess such a request?

With a deep growl, he once again grabs your head and entangles his fingers in your blonde hair before slamming into your mouth once again, his balls resting on your chin. Matt lets out a sigh of satisfaction of how wonderful your warm wet mouth feels on his hard length. You will surely be rewarded for pleasing your papa.

He groaned loudly as his tip brushed the back of your throat, earning a gag from your tiny throat. He stays in this position to feel your throat adjust to his thick cock and your tongue blushing along his shaft. Once he felt he wanted more, he began to buck his hips into your mouth. Practically fucking it while exploring every inch of your mouth and throat.

You felt his cock twitch in your mouth, indicating his end coming soon. Matt growled as he tightened his grip on your head, “Fuck, papa is going to cum. I want you to swallow every drop, got it?” He said, more so an order than a question. He began to buck into your mouth at a faster and harder pace.

“Fuck!” he groaned out,h is seed spilling into your mouth and onto your tongue. Cum leaking out at the corners of your mouth  as you began to swallow all of his cum. He pulled out of your throat, a long string of saliva attached between your lips and his cock. He stood there panting heavily as he looked at the mess before him.

He noticed the pool of juices running down your legs and onto the floor. Matt grinned mischievously, “Looks like my little maple leaf made a mess? I guess I will have to punish her.” He said before gathering your plush form into his arms before making his way to the bedroom for your “punishment”.

anonymous asked:

2p's daughter brought her boyfriend to dinner, everything was going on fine, until their daughter said "daddy can you pass the salt?" when he reaches to salt to give it to her, her boyfriend reaches to the salt too at the same moment. There is dead silence. How would they react?

2P! Italy:
- “give me one good reason why he shouldn’t end up like your exes”
-“what happened to your exes?” “dAD’S JUST MESSING AROUND”
- permanent glare at his daughter’s boyfriend
- he’ll deal with him some other day

2P! Germany:
- mcfreaking loses it
- gets smacked by his daughter
- he’s pretty chill as long as they’re safe fucking

2P! Japan:
- “I am giving you ten seconds to leave this house”
- it’s only okay is h e ’ s doing it (which is complete bullshit, kuro)
- just give him a few days and he’ll be chill kinda

2P! Romano:
- overreacts™
- interrogates them
- will definitely tell the boyfriend’s parents about this

2P! Prussia:
- continues to pick up the salt
- but he’s staring intensely at the boyfriend and disappointedly at his daughter
- “we’ll talk about this later” he mouths to his daughter
- proceeds dinner as planned

2P! Austria:
- “I see how this is”
- embarrasses the frick out of them
- gives them tips n’ tricks
- gets yelled at by his daughter

2P! America:
- mentally having a fit
- “use a goddamned condom, aight?”
- gives a smug look at his daughter
- gets food flung at him
- war breaks out

2P! England:
- “gee golly, sweetie, I think you’ve misheard it”
- he didn’t want to make this situation even more awkward
- so he just let it slide
- f o r n o w

2P! Canada:
- well he’s pretty pissed

2P! France:
- “…if that’s what you’re into then I won’t judge”
- lowkey judging
- he’s literally staring the the boyfriend the entire time
- awkward silence throughout the dinner

2P! Russia:
- “Your boyfriend and I need to have a talk”
- also pretty pissed
- but he’ll handle it like an Adult™
- like Ion isn’t intimidating enough

2P! China:
- “I don’t want any grandchildren yet, for shits sake”
- he’ll joke about it lmao
- “if ya need any condoms, they’re in the drawer” “dAD”

2P! South Korea:
- “Jesus christ, (daughter’s name), I didn’t raise you like this” “dAD” “Are you referring to me or him?”
- jokingly threatens the boyfriend
- but he took seriously lmao