So I saw the post by xxseverus-snapexx about how out of character is is when Snape is portrayed as some kind of suave sex god in fic. (Don’t get me wrong though, ooc-ness can be fun at times.) They mentioned Snape lacking the confidence, or even the knowledge, of how to sweep someone off their feet. Of how to deal with romantic relationships in general. Yes, please. But I’ve always wanted to take that a step further (and in a different direction, I guess) and say that he’s not only unsure, he’s a bumbling mess when it comes to someone showing interest in him or vice versa. Someone (Lily, Hermione, Harry, whoever you prefer) compliments him? Freezes. Blinks. Just literally stares until the other person changes the subject. Someone he has a bit of a thing for (not that he would ever admit it to a soul, of course) smiles at him? Actually trips over his own feet. Trying to have a conversation? Stuttering mess. Continuously saying weird/stupid things until the other person is barely holding in their laughter and oh merlin someone just put him out of his misery. And don’t even get me started on what would happen if someone actually kissed Snape. The poor man would probably pass out. Cold on the floor. Wakes up in a hospital bed with Pomfrey standing over him wanting to know what the fuck happened, but he’s blushing too hard to speak and at this point Pomfrey is really very concerned, and oh fuck, there’s the person who just kissed him, standing in the doorway, what the fuck does he do now. He’s fighting the urge to jump out the window or under the bed or just anywhere where he cant see the smirk on their face and why is it that he can handle being cross examined by the fucking Dark Lord, but he can’t handle a little kiss or a touch what the hell is wrong with him??