awkward moments

Today on "A day in the life of a smol trans dude": Milo's adventures at target
  • ME: *finds pants I want to try on*
  • Mom: "Go try those on, I'll meet you over there."
  • Me: *Goes to fitting room* *falters at which side to go on because Im so used to going to the girls side*
  • Target lady: "This side little man" *Points to mens*
  • Me: *is Happy* *Leaves after trying on pants*
  • *5 minutes later*
  • Mom: *goes to fitting room* "Have you seen my son?"
  • Target lady: "Is he really good looking?"
  • Mom: "That's him"
  • Target lady: "He just wandered off... He's almost too pretty to be a boy."
  • Mom: "Haha yeah he is really good looking, thanks."
  • ------------------
  • Man if only she knew : ')
youtube

Have you guys seen this yet? 😂😂😂

anonymous asked:

Single dad au?? Maybe it's not really a secret child but they are very shy and tony is totes mama bear protective so spawn is kept out of the media. Maybe tony takes spawn to parent/child group activity (like painting or cooking class) led by [bucky, Sam, tchalla, Nat take your pick] and spawn absolutely loves teacher and then they are big happy family 😄 or alternatively tony/spawn meet another parent/kid duo and hit it off

Oh. Oh. With every new AU I hadn’t considered, so many new doors open themselves… Also I love how you call Tony’s beloved child a spawn lol.

For Tony his child is the centre of the world and it doesn’t matter how busy work gets or how much Pepper yells at him, every Thursday afternoon at 2 o’clock, he’s at the tiny bookstore right across the street of his favourite coffee shop, where an employee–his name is Sam Wilson, he’s twenty-nine and Tony is not interested in him at all–reads to the children.

It was an accident when they first stumbled upon one such session, but Aileen fell heads over heels in love with Sam–thankfully in a completely I-makes-the-best-voices-daddy way. And well, Tony’s never been all that good at saying no to Aileen when it comes to these sort of things (he’s surprisingly good at not buying her endless toys though).

So they’ve come back ever since, Aileen to listen to a new story and Tony to stare at Sam dazzling a bunch of children into worshiping the grounds he walks on. They regularly stay behind too, and by some sort of divine intervention Tony always ends up chatting with Sam for a little while–who, aside from being great with children and amazingly hot, is also unfairly funny and great to talk to.

Alright, so maybe Tony has a small crush on the man. But he’s not a complete idiot, he won’t act on it. He’s not going to ruin this for his daughter, not in a million years. Besides there’s one advantage to admiring from afar: reality doesn’t get the chance to crush your dreams.

There are moments where he almost thinks that maybe his interest isn’t so one-sided though. When Sam laughs at one of his jokes, even though it’s kind of a dumb one for example. Or when Sam smiles at him over the top of his excitable daughter’s head. Or when–yeah, well, whatever. Tony’s good at seeing things the way he wants them to be instead of how they really are, so what does he know.

The real problem is that having a excitable five year old daughter who loves fairytales. Because one day, near the end of the reading, Aileen suddenly speaks up. Which is unusual, she gets too caught up in the stories normally. But when Sam reads about the marriage of the prince and the princess, suddenly her hand is up in the air and she starts talking (she still forgets sometimes that she’s supposed to wait until her name is called).

“Why does she marry the prince?” she asks.

“Because they love each other,” Sam explains, radiating nothing but gentle patience in the face of the interruption.

“So when people are in love they marry?”

“Not always but yes, a lot of them do,” Sam agrees.

Aileen frowns and Tony edges closer towards her, wants to remind her that she can still ask her questions after Sam’s finished the story, but her next words stop him dead.

“But then when are you and daddy gonna marry?” she asks, turns towards her frozen father in confusion. “You’re in love, don’t you wanna marry? Daddy, you can have my green dress if you wanna!”

Tony is blushing so hard, he’s sure he’ll pass out any moment. (He also can’t help but feel a tiny bit of sappy happiness at his daughters’ willingness to lend him her favourite dress). It helps a little that Sam is flushed too, but Tony still has to fight the urge to grab his kid and make a run for it right there and then. Thankfully the children are distracted by the ending of the story, and if Sam has to clear his throat three times before he continues reading it out, that doesn’t have to mean anything.

The parents give them a couple of very long (in some cases very judging) glances though.

(They’ll figure it out eventually but what would life be without a little awkward pining?)

Awkward Moments

“One moment unstuck other stuck!”-Deyth Banger


Raven launched into the air, narrowly missing the sticky red trap that rocketed towards her. Black energy crackled at her fingertips, and Raven muttered her mantra. “Azarath, Mentrion, Zinthos!”

The energy grew and warped into a fist, launching itself at the irritating, masked thief. Red X dodged it, much to her ire.

“Missed me, birdie.”

Raven scowled. A barrage of starbolts rained down from above, spurring Red X to leap across the rooftop and out of range.

The ever irritating thief had decided once again to attempt to rob some stupid corporation Raven hardly cared about. Which left the Titans chasing after him, ruining her relaxing night and interrupting her reading, something she did care about.

Everyone else was pretty peeved off as well, given by the cloud of annoyance pulsating in the air. The intensity of it was slowly beginning to give her a headache, and Raven wanted nothing more than to catch the bastard and go home. But Red X was a slippery villain, and had a nasty habit of getting away.

And every time that happened, their night became a whole lot worse.

Raven shook her head and zipped towards Starfire, her dark energy mingling with the blazing starbolts in an attempt to better subdue the thief. Cannon blasts echoed among the streets, accompanied by Cyborg’s frustrated growls and curses as Red X leaped nimbly aside.

“This is too easy,” Red X said, yawning exaggeratedly. He launched some of his sticky red x’s at them, landing a hit on Cyborg. It began sparking on contact, bringing the cybernetic teen down. There was a shout, then Robin was upon him. The two grappled, fists swinging.

“Azarath, Mentrion, Zinthos!”

Raven conjured up more black tendrils at his feet, trying to snare the wayward villain. Red X dodged them of course, landing a hefty kick into Robin’s chest in the process. A few things happened at once, then.

Beast Boy exploded from a pile of rubble, his green form in the shape of a tiger. Raven surrounded her fist in a ball of black energy, launching herself towards Red X.

Raven wasn’t really sure what happened next. One second, she was flying towards Red X, the next, a blur of green collided with her and sent her sprawling.

She landed on the ground in a heap, the weight of the tiger regressing back to the weight of Beast Boy sprawled on top of her. Raven groaned.

Well, that hurt.

“Rae?” Beast Boy’s voice was low and husky, and he sounded a little dazed. She blinked, his concerned expression coming into view.

Oh.

He was right on top of her, his face only inches from hers. Suddenly, the air felt hot and stuffy, and Raven almost forgot how to breath.

Had his eyes always been this pretty?

She’d always known them to be green, but up close, she could see the valleys and forests of greens swirling there. They shifted and changed as he stared, constantly evolving to the pace of his thoughts and emotions. It was enchanting, really.

“Uh, Rae?”

Raven blinked again. “Hmm?”

“You okay?”

She forced herself to nod, struggling to wiggle out of his grasp. “Y-yeah, I’m fine. Can you get off of me now?”

Beast Boy winced. “I would, but I uh…I think I’m stuck.”

“What do you mean, stuck?” she asked. Raven craned her neck, trying to see what Beast Boy could possibly have been referring to, when she saw it. A red stripe banded his arm, looking very much like the same color red as the x-traps belonging to the very Red X himself. Raven let her head fall back against the concrete and let out a groan.

This day just had to get weirder, didn’t it?

“Can we at least get off the ground? This is…awkward…”

She could practically feel his blush, his embarrassment was that intense. He stammered some unintelligible phrases in agreement, and proceeded to attempt to push himself and her into a sitting position.

Raven tried to help, she really did, but it quickly became apparent that her arms were bound with the sticky red substance that held the two of them together, thus making her mobility limited.

Well, this wasn’t going to work. Raven heaved a sigh and willed her powers to come bubbling to the surface. Tendrils of black curled and tickled at her skin, and she muttered her mantra under her breath. “Azarath, Mentrion, Zinthos!”

Just like that, she pushed them upright. Now that she was off of the ground, Raven could get a better bearing on the extent of their situation.

They were very much stuck together; though that was nothing new. The last time this happened, however, they were back to back. This time…

Raven flushed. The x-trap bound them tightly together, and there was no real stretch room. Unless Beast Boy transformed, but she doubted that would make things less…weird. And things were certainly weird enough, as it was.

Though they were now upright, their position was still awkward at best. Raven was practically straddling Beast Boy, thanks to the stupid x-trap. Their legs were entangled together, and she had to lean back to keep her nose out of the crook of his neck. Her arms were bound uselessly to her sides, while he had at least one free arm.

Luck of the draw, she supposed.

Raven sighed. Why did these things always happen to her?

“Beast Boy? Raven? Are you guys…okay?”

They both turned to see Robin standing over them, a bemused expression tickling his features. She took a little bit of satisfaction in the small little red x’s strapping his skin and uniform, but a scowl still tainted her features.

“Does it look like we’re okay?”

He opened his mouth to answer, but Cyborg beat him to the punch.

“Well, BB seems to be enjoying himself!”

Beast Boy cringed, embarrassment pouring off of him. He refused to meet her gaze and leaned away from her, wriggling against their bonds. “Just cut us loose!” he snapped. Raven felt his heart pounding in his chest, and she was pretty sure his ears were turning red.

Worse yet, she could feel her own face burning, too.

Robin produced one of his bird-a-rangs  and sliced through the x-trap with ease, allowing them to fall apart. Beast Boy sprang away immediately, ducking his head and marching off towards the tower. Raven bit her lip and watched him go, an array of thoughts plaguing her mind.

Did…did Beast Boy like her?


Here we are! Prompt number two. XD I figured this would be entertaining, and I certainly loved writing it! So enjoy. :)

-mod vixensheart

That feel when u female and u at church and the preacher man b all “dang these teenaged boys and their pornography destroying the moral fabric society!” And u just sitting there with like 3 tabs of smut on your phone ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Awkward Moments (Part 1)

Prompt: Imagine being in love with Howard Stark back in the 40s…Only to meet his son nearly a century later. What will Tony think of you?

Word Count: 1230

Warning: A few layers of angst later on

Note: I thought of this as I watched Captain America: First Avenger, I loved Howard’s humor and his wit. So I was inspired. It also prompted me to binge watch Agent Carter from start to finish. I realize this is sort of…out of my usual scope, but inspiration struck so I went with it! I hope you like it!

These chapters will be rather short.

Shout out to my beta @like-a-bag-of-potatoes

Forever Tags: @capsmuscles@cocosierra94@essie1876@magpiegirl80@letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked​ @harleyquinnandscarletwitch @iamwarrenspeace @marvel-imagines-yes-please @superwholocked527 @myparadise1982sand @missinstantgratification @thejulesworld @rda1989 @marvelloushamilton @munlis  @bubblyanarocks3@thefridgeismybestie@random-fluffy-pink-unicorn @hardcollectionworldtrash @igiveupicantthinkofausername @kaliforniacoastalteens@feelmyroarrrr@kaeling @ijustwanttobepartofyourworld

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hand me that tester,” Howard gently commanded to you.

You immediately handed it to your boss. He attached the two clamps onto pieces on the motherboard then turned to you.

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anonymous asked:

Are you aware of Alternate Universes like Underswap or Underfell?

Necros has been to a few different universes via any rifts he manages to find in the Void, he’s also come across a couple different Underswaps and Underfells. With every universe he’s managed to find he makes a point of taking something as a “souvenir” and keeps them in a room back at his Void Home. That way, in case something were to happen to said world via Hacked!Chara’s, “modifications”, he has proof the worlds existed at all.

Awkward Moments (Part 2)

Prompt: Imagine being in love with Howard Stark back in the 40s…Only to meet his son nearly a century later. What will Tony think of you?

Word Count: 1004

Warning: A few layers of angst

Note: I thought of this as I watched Captain America: First Avenger, I loved Howard’s humor and his wit. So I was inspired. It also prompted me to binge watch Agent Carter from start to finish. I realize this is sort of…out of my usual scope, but inspiration struck so I went with it! I hope you like it!

These chapters will be rather short.

Shout out to my super amazing beta @like-a-bag-of-potatoes

Forever Tags: @capsmuscles @cocosierra94 @essie1876 @magpiegirl80 @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked @harleyquinnandscarletwitch @iamwarrenspeace @marvel-imagines-yes-please @superwholocked527 @myparadise1982sand @missinstantgratification @thejulesworld @rda1989 @marvelloushamilton @munlis  @bubblyanarocks3@thefridgeismybestie@random-fluffy-pink-unicorn @hardcollectionworldtrash @igiveupicantthinkofausername @kaliforniacoastalteens@feelmyroarrrr@kaeling @ijustwanttobepartofyourworld

AM Tags: @masha-meow01 @mellsstark

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a year after Steve Rogers gave his life to help end the terror that Hydra was causing. You mourned the loss of a dear friend and American hero.

In honor of his memory, though, you and Howard were still leading research on the Tesseract. In order to determine what was so important about it to Schmidt. Trying to learn things about it. Learn what it could do, how it could help, how to properly harness it’s power.

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BBRAE Week 2017 -  Awkward Moments

He could not say when or how it happened, but at some point during the beginning stages of the formation of their team, he became the designated doctor. Sure, Raven helped out every now and then with her magic healing capabilities, volunteering when needed to help heal some of the more serious wounds that needed immediate medical attention (something he could not always provide when they were in the heat of a battle). However, he took on the brunt of the work. He supposed it was, because he was the only one with any medical experience. He was more of an engineer than a doctor, but because of his current medical condition, he had to be somewhat fluent in the world of health and medicine. Therefore, thanks to his knowledge in the medical field, he took it upon himself to assist his team by keeping them as healthy as possible. This meant he had to conduct routine exams on each of his teammates, to ensure they are at their best health capacity.

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  • so this just happened...
  • guy customer: hey when's your next day off
  • me: this weekend, why?
  • guy customer: may I ask you to coffee?
  • me: hate to do this to you but I'm a lesbian
  • guy customer: well that sucks
  • girl customer: oh hell yeah, want to get coffee?
  • me: oh my god

You know, playing ‘Before Awakening’ can be kind of awkward when you married Chrom. It’s like:
“Ohhh, hey Chrom….. didn’t know you’d be here….. How’s Lucina and Morgan…..”
“Leave you? I would never do such a thing”
“I never cheated on you with a green haired ninja or a wolf furry…. they’re just…. really good friends…..”
“Kids? What kids? Oh, you must be talking about the little boy and girl who keep calling me mom! I’m not really their mother….. I’m just… kinda like a mother to them….. heh…”