awh this is so cute

How each Overwatch character texts

Genji- laughs aloud at your response but leaves you on read if he has nothing to add. Doesn’t see an issue with this.

Doomfist- rarely and only when he’s got something important to say. Generally prefers to FaceTime. When he does text, it’s clear and to the point.

McCree- “I’m ur huckleberry 😘🤠 lol. Sent from my iPhone”

Pharah- Promptly and with perfect grammar. When she is sarcastic, people worry she is being serious and that they’ve angered her.

Reaper- if you had plans at 6:00 and you’re one minute late, instead of waiting a few minutes or texting you “ETA?” he just sends an angry selfie with the place you’re supposed to meet in the background and the Snapchat overlay reading “6:01” over it

Soldier: 76- still somehow has a phone plan where texts cost 15 cents apiece. Left you a voicemail that you definitely didn’t listen to. Gets mad when nobody listens to his voicemails. When someone suggests he get a phone plan with unlimited texting, he goes on a rant about how he doesn’t need it and people should just check their voicemails more often

Sombra: screenshots every conversation just in case. Half of her messages are screenshots of other messages. Nobody can reach her unless she wants to be reached because all of her messages always come from a different number.

Tracer- often sends one-word texts that require the recipient to call her for clarification. For example: “Beatles?? 😰”

Bastion- texts exclusively in emoji

Hanzo- similar to Genji but he just sends back “lol” as an acknowledgement that he has received and read the text, regardless of the appropriate tone.

Junkrat- phone is broken, has no one to text. If someone needs to contact him they do it through Roadhog.

Widowmaker- lurks in the Talon group text. Responds only when she has something to say. If she’s got a problem with you she’ll send you a vague but menacing “we need to talk” message and then switch off her phone for 14 hours so that by the time she follows up you’ve had several panic attacks and are willing to do whatever she says to avoid being in trouble. Do not be friends with Widowmaker.

Mei- double texts but is anxious about double texting. If you send her something that made you think of her she’ll respond along the lines of “awh!! cute!! 😊 thank you so much for sharing this!!”

Torbjörn- his last 30 texts are a back and forth with his wife. “On my way home. Do we need anything from the store?” “Nope.”

D.Va- sometimes gets distracted and forgets to text people back, but when she is texting, she hits “send” about 14 times before she finishes a complete thought. A series of texts from D.Va might start out “Okay” “So” “I’ve got to tell you” “did I mention what my dad said today?”

Orisa- you know that one person in the group chat who’s younger than everyone else? That’s Orisa

Reinhardt- all caps all the time. He will send you a meme followed by “HAHAHAHAHA” and then sign it “REINHARDT WILHELM”

Roadhog- sends menacing and unclear texts like “meet me in front of target in 30 minutes. we will leave without you.” which doesn’t really tell you whether he’s threatening to leave without you if you’re late or informing you that he will not be giving you a ride home from target and you should arrange your own transportation.

Winston- sends you links to 9-minute videos on YouTube

Zarya- sends context-free nonsense like “hey everyone settle a debate which finger would you choose to lose if you had to choose one finger?” and if people ask her “what the hell” she responds “))))”

Ana- sends Fareeha a cartoon where the little cartoon lady is rolling her eyes and saying “don’t even LOOK at me until I’ve had my morning coffee!!” and captions it “made me think of you!! xxx your mother Ana Amari”

Lucio- this is who D.Va was texting with earlier, and he’s very responsive to everyone’s stories. He also owns that Jackbox party game and regularly invites everyone to play. It’s always fun. A group chat with Lucio is always very active.

Mercy- incredibly passive aggressive. Refuses to engage in a text conversation unless the other person initiated it and therefore never really texts.

Symmetra- prefers texting to talking. Never makes a typo. Will respond to a text with “K.” and doesn’t always realize this comes across as “I am upset with you,” which was not her intent.

Zenyatta- this is the guy you text for advice or to vent. He’s 100% in your corner, he never takes the stranger’s side, and if you start out “ugh you’re not gonna believe what happened,” he’ll respond “👀”

youtube

New Yang Nam Show [방탄소년단편] 지민, 고1 무용대회 모습 대공개! 170223 EP.1  

live blogging my reaction to everything that happens

WARNING: SPOILERS

•HES GOT THE SCISSORS
•BARKO DIAZ LMAO
•she has his jacket awh
•fuck you possums
•dead bodies hanging from a tree aight coo
•tiny alligator WAA.
•mountain of tiny alligators WAA.
•SHE TORE THE JACKET FUCK THAT
•"old and grey like you" savage
•they killed her omg that’s dark
•"GRANDMA FARM TO PLAY WITH OTHER GRANDMAS" AWH MY HEART
•damn commercials.
•young moon looks so much like star omg
•APOLOGY MEAT I LOVE IT
•they’re so young and cute awh
•if i had just awoken after 300 years i, too, would immediately want candy
•apology meat pt. 2
•OKAY BUT HIM BITING OFF HIS ARM JUST TO GROW IT BACK TO PROVE HES TOUGH IS LOW KEY FUNNY
•HIS FACE WHEN HIS FINGER DOESNT GROW BACK LMAO THE UTTER DISAPPOINTMENT
•MOON IS SO BADASS.
•damn commercials.
•taco delivery bird.
•ludo’s reaction to the wand hand is how i handle every situation ever
•LUDO THE BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE
•"so this is probably not one of my favorite things that’s happened to me" lol me
•"i hurt in places i didn’t know i had"
•glossaryk trying to roast the pudding but it keeps melting off is an excellent metaphor for my life
•he finally cooked it
•i get ludo’s supposed to be evil and all but sometimes i feel bad for the guy.
•damn commercials.
•ew back hair.
•for a second there i thought River missed his wife and then he goes and throws a party
•make that two parties
•river, stop being a dumbass.
•okay now he misses her.
•THEY CALL THEMSELVES MEWMANS AHA
•high key feel bad for the monster for walking all that way for nothing.
•damn commercials.
•shit this things 2 hours long.
•"ima snek" “lol fuk u snek”
•BUFF FROG
•HE HAS A TATTOO OF LUDO FOREVER UNDER HIS BUFF FROG BOOBIE OMG
•star you can’t just NOT HAVE A PLAN
•damn commercials.
•anyone notice the flags on the castle resemble toffees hand with the missing finger??
•marco, now is always the time for butter.
•ruberiot is my two favorite things. patrick stump. and svtfoe.
•the mime is an artistic genius.
•ruberiots voice is sex.
•*casually scratches armpit with foot*
•LEVATADO
•damn commercials.
•star possumfly
•THEY FINALLY FOUND EACH OTHER AWH YAY
•"W-O-N-D"
•BUFF FROG
•stars voice coming out of ludo’s body is uncomfortabl
•TOFFEE.
•damn commercials.
•"she’s gone" SHE CANT BE GONE
•moons eyes welling up with tears made my eyes well up with tears
•POOR LUDO HES SO SAD AWH
•STAR’S BACK YAY
•just kiss already jfc
•oh it’s over okay.
•i like the old ending theme song better.

Undercover{ Pt.5}

Steve Rogers x Reader 

 Warnings: semi smutty, swearing, NSFW Gifs 

 Undercover Masterlist      Marvel MasterList


 After two hours of dealing with Steve arguing with the CIA agent you learned a few things

1.) even the CIA was dumb enough not to see past Steves terrible disguise
2.) the CIA believed you and Steve were hydra
3.) they bugged your house
4.) the CIA would be better off run by monkeys .

How could they not know about shield sending agents U.C? Communication skills are really that shitty now? After the pissing contest stopped , you decide to join forces ,agreeing that this hydra operation needs to be taken down , and the more hands the better . The house is debugged , and you call Coulson to inform him of everything that’s happened . When your new Allie leaves , then you both let out sighs of relief .

“ atleast now it’ll be easier .” You comment , and Steve shakes his head
“ no, now we have more chances of getting caught . The more of us , the more risk of someone figuring out we arent who we are ; it’s more room for error. ”

“ okay captain pessimism”You snap . The last thing you need is negativity ; you’re already worried enough.

“ it’s realistic y/n.” The sound of your real name is almost foreign now. You realize that being debugged means things go back to normal while in the house , real names , you don’t have to put on a show ; that means no sex . Well damn.

“ yeah no shit Steve. What the hell do we do now ?”

 “ we have one less suspect,but we have to be even more careful. With three of us not being who we claim we are, the chances of a slip up is increased . We have to up our game a little,keep our cover in tact for as long as we can. ” 

“that means we can’t be seen being too cozy with the other agent , keep your relationship with him at work the same it’s been. No weird looks across the room to each other and no odd coffee room interactions steve . Keep it normal .”

He nods as he grabs his clothes and heads to the bathroom . You expect him to make a comment inviting you to his shower , like he has previously , but when the bathroom door shuts your knocked back into reality. Your little undercover dream life with Steve shatters around you, now only being allowed in public . You sigh, silently wishing the house was still bugged . Ridiculous , I know


 Days pass, you both spend time with people from Steves work when he’s off , making sure to up the amount of PDA infront of others . Which ofcourse , you try not to take advantage of. But you did yourself pulling him into long, sweet kisses any chance it’s appropriate, and he doesn’t seem to hesitate at all, almost as if he was as desperate for them as you . The feeling of Steves plush lips on yours is something you’ve grown addicted to . While you two are still sleeping in the same bed , you fall asleep on seperate sides , waking up and quickly moving away when you both find your limbs tangled together . Your friendship has grown though, you laugh together , taunt each other and treat each other like people who have known each other for their entire lives; even when you’re not Public, so that’s a bonus . 

 “alright guys, we should get going , some of us have work in the morning .” Steve laughs as he playfully pulls you into his side . You just finished your 4th glass of sangria , and everything is a little blurry . You giggle , shoving your face into his shoulder . 

“ awh she’s so cute when she’s drunk ! “ Katie yells with a laugh. 

“ im not drunk! I’m just- shut up Katie youre bombed!” You retort slightly slurred , making everyone burst into laughter . You wave goodbye and allow steve to guide to you the car . You Keep your eyes out the window for the drive , not looking at steve at all until your home , and in the house . You send him a smile and send him a wink( your code of letting him now what you’re doing.)

 You go to check your burner phone to see if coulson has made contact , and he has .

 “ the house has been rebugged, cover needs to stay intact 24/7, be safe-P" 

 Oh shit . You take a few breath and wobble down the hall, the sangria hitting you a little harder than you expected. You enter the kitchen seeing steve leaning against the counter with a glass of water to his lips. How do I let him know about the bugs ? OH . You stand infront of him, taking the glass away and setting it down . You trail your fingers up his chest , sending him a shy smile . It feels odd doing this now that it’s just the two of you, but you can’t deny that you’re excited to be this way all the time again. It’s so unprofessional, and you’re aware of that, but you honestly don’t give a flying fuck.

 “ Chris , I feel a little .. dirty .i think I’m going to hop in the shower, care to join me?” Please get the message , please

 He doesn’t speak, he just leans down and lifts you bridal style as you giggle . 

He sets you down when you enter your bedroom, pushing you against the bedroom door as he closes it . His lips crash against yours in a needy kiss , his hands roaming your body and lifting your sundress off you . He moves back, taking in your bare chest and blue lace thong . You see a flicker lust in his eyes , but you don’t get a chance to comment on it , his lips successfully quieting yours . He lifts you once again, this time wrapping your legs around his waist as he walks you to the bathroom . He slams the door behind him, dropping you to your feet as he turns on the shower . 

As steam billows around the two of you, he removes his clothes and you slip off your thong. You are into the shower, steve close behind . The second you’re both in he finally speaks ,

 “ bugged?” He whispers, his hand landing gently on your waist . You nod , biting your lip as you do. He runs his thumb over you bottom lip, and you release it from between your teeth . His lips are on yours again, slow this time, like he’s drawing out the kiss. You follow his pace, slowly gliding your hands up his body until they wind around his neck .

 His hands move down to your ass, kneading the cheeks as his tongue rolls against yours . You pull back, gasping for air , leaning your forehead against his shoulder as his hands grip your waist to turn you to face the shower head . His hands slide from your waist down to your clit, gently massaging with one hand while the other tugs one of your nipple in the other . 

 “ fuck- please .” You whimper, letting out a low moan when he finally plunges two fingers into your pussy. He keeps the pace slow , but hard and has you teetering over the edge in no time . 

“ I missed the sounds you make .” He whispers into your ears , his finger still gently pulling you through your orgasm . 

You whip around , connecting your lips in another desperate kiss. He was totally hoping we’d get bugged again too. Fuck yes . As he moves his lips down from your lips to your neck, your mind wanders to other things . Things that finally make you push away from his as his lips seal around of your nipples. He sends you a confused look, and you voice your thoughts .

 “ who wasn’t at Peters today? ” you quietly ask, moving closer so you mouth is near his ear . Your hands stay on him, roaming over his toned body as you converse 

 “ uhm I- I think max and his girlfriend were the only ones not -”

 “ weird how they aren’t there on the day our house gets bugged,huh?” You nip his ear , and he releases a sigh. 

 “ anyone ever tell you you’re a genius ?” 

 You hum in response , dropping to your knees infront of him. You lick the underside of steve hard cock, moving to swirl your tongue around his leaking tip , moaning at the taste of his salty precum on your tongue . You don’t bother teasing , you dove right in and set a steady, quick pace as you bob your head . You relax your gag reflex , taking Steves long length as far in your Mouth as you can, earning strangled groans from the man above you . His hands thread through your hair, but don’t push you , they just relax there . You move your hand to cup his balls, and you feel them tighten immediately. 

 “ doll I’m - fuck -”. His warning is cut off by his climax suddenly ripping through him , both of you moaning as his cum coats your mouth . You manage to swallow all of it before you stand , sending steve a small smile . 

 “ how much do you know about max?”

 “ not too much, but I’ll get on it .find the right time, and text Robert Off the burner and inform him on this, and see if he knows anything about max. He’s been here longer than us, he’s gotta know something .” 

 The rest of the shower goes on as normal, and your cover stays up as soon as you leave the bathroom . 


 A couple days later 

 Agent Robert  Bart didn’t  have any further information on Max , he said max usually Keeps to himself and another officer, Dave cooper and sometimes peter since they get paired together on duty sometimes . Steve has been observing them , noticing they whisper quite a lot , and seem slightly aggressive. 

 Peter and Katie are holding an anniversary party this weekend , they invited most of the precinct that wasn’t on shift , including max ,his wife and Dave cooper. You managed to find out that they  all rsvp'ed to the party , and you immediately begin formulating a plan . Most of your planning has to be done in the shower with Steve , the sound of water disrupting any bug that could be near . After Steve shooting down numerous ideas, you’re only left with one . 

“Alright, how about this : we go to the party for a while , I’ll plan a fake call to my phone , saying something about a family emergency and I’ll take off. We have max and daves addresses, and since they’ll be at the party, I can scope out their houses , have coulson check for cameras before i go in, then see if I can find anything . ” 

 “ you want to go in, alone ? With our luck they will come home while you’re there.Are you out of your fucking-” 

 “ I’m an agent steve, this is our job, why we are here. Going in alone isn’t out of the ordinary, and it’s our only option. If we both leave , it’ll cause suspicion .” You snap . What the hell is up his ass, why is he shooting down all my ideas? Then it hits you, most of your ideas included you going on your own. Anger flares at the thought of steve trying to control everything , almost as if he doesn’t think you can do it by yourself . This isn’t going to fucking fly

“it’s not safe-”

 “ of course it’s not fucking safe, but that’s the job steve . I can handle myself , and if you don’t think I can you should of asked for a new partner when I fucking got here.” You bark .“ This is the plan , and we are doing it . End of discussion.” You slam the water knob off, and step out of the shower , leaving a confused, aggravated steve naked in the shower stall.  

 You feel him come behind you as you stand Infront of the bathroom mirror, his arms winding around your waist and and his head moving to rest on your shoulder as he speaks 

“I don’t want anything to happen to you doll. I-”

You turn around in his arms, placing a finger over his lips. You can’t focus on the danger, as much as you want to hear what he’s going to say next, you know if you do you might rethink your plan to ease his mind. You pull him into a sweet kiss beforehand leaving  the bathroom  .it’s not your job to keep Steves nerves at bay, your job is to keep the world safe from things like hydra, regardless of the danger for yourself .


 The day of the party .

  You walk into the party and immediately are greeted by everyone , and introduced to those you didn’t meet yet ; including max, his wife (Kat) and Dave.You immediately get a bad vibe from each of them , the kind of vibe that screams ‘hi, I work for a a group of neurotic psychopaths, hail hydra!’ 

 The fake call comes in about two hours into the party , you recognize the voice over the phone as daisy johnsons , and you have to bite back a smile at your friends voice. When you hang up you frantically grab onto steve , explain the ’ situation’ to him and those standing around him ( Peter, Katie, Max, kat(his wife), Dave, and a few others ) , telling them about how your mother fell while at your sisters and is in the hospital , you include how you are going to grab a flight and head back home to be with her. Peter offers to take steve home later so you can take the car to go pack and get to the airport asap. You say your goodbyes , Katie wipes away the fake tears when you hug her and wave to the others as you hurriedly take off . Steve sends you a worried glance , and you run back to give him a quick kiss, silently trying to quiet his fears. 

He hasn’t been shy about voicing his dislike of the plan, he even made a bet with you earlier , whoever was wrong has laundry &  kitchen duty for a week. He bet that one of them will come home and jeopardize everything , & you opposed saying you can get in and out undetected . You reassured him no matter what happens , you’ll handle it . 


  You hop in your car and head off . You grab your burner from the Glove box, calling coulson . 

“cameras?” You ask right away 

 “ none that I can detect, I routed the addresses I into your gps, the houses are 3 minutes apart . Don’t be reckless agent , if they are hydra-” 

 “ yeah yeah , I know the speech Phil. I can do this .” 

“ that’s my girl . Stay safe.” 

  With That you hangup, and pull into your garage.  You grab your hidden utility belt  and dump the  contents into a mini backpack. you tighten your thigh holsters high up on your thighs, loading the guns as you tuck them in place on both thighs.  You grab your phone and tap into the gps. This town is relatively small, the neighborhoods within reasonable walking distance of each other making this so much easier. You maneuver your way through yards in the shadows,trying to map out the quickest route for you to get between your house and your destination.  Daves house was 6 away from max’s, which will hopefully work in your favor. Thankfully the walk was only 14 minutes, when you’re a few houses down from max’s You  set yourself on high alert  . Here we go. 

The sun has just set , the darkness making the perfect cover for you to slip up Max’s front steps . You pick the front doors lock, quietly shutting it behind you. You pull your flashlight from your purse , not wanting to have the Neighbors see lights on in the house . You snoop around, not seeing anything stand out besides the cheesy pictures of him and cat kissing all over the place. That looks so fixed, I bet they aren’t even married!

You make your way around the house , landing back at the front door with zero evidence . You relock the door then head to daves . The second you step into his house , you notice a small side table in the entrance hall. You shine the flashlight on it, catching a gleam off a small odd shaped pin. You slide on a pair of gloves (gotta keep your prints off everything !) and lift the pin, eyes widening when you realize what you’re holding . A fucking hydra pin.

 “ holy shit .” You pull your phone out, snapping a picture . You creep through the rest of the house , coming across blueprints , and a painting , that flips over into a white board, filled with pictures of everyone at the precinct. Holy hell, he’s good. You snap pictures then get ready to head out . You approach the entrance hall to exit, you freeze when you hear the door handle turning on the front door . You eternally groan, and curse steve for predicting this . Of course , of fucking course he’d come home. 

You bolt back to the kitchen , panic flooding your body when you hear the door clam closed. You grab a towel from the kitchen counter and use it to open the back patio door. You sprint out of the house, not kissing the sound of a gun cocking from behind you . Shit shit shit . You hear the echoe  of the gun before you feel a sharp pain shoot throughthe top of your arm. 

“Son of a bitch” your pace barely falter as you run through the neighboring yards, the pain only intensifies when you have to climb over multiple fences until you’re a safe distance away from Daves and you’re sure he isn’t following you anymore. 

Jumping a fence in a sundress, not the most comfortable thing. you finally end up in yours and Steves backyard , and you can see him pacing from through the kitchen window .  He’s not going to be happy about this . You nearly fall over as a surge of dizziness sets in in now that your standing still. Fucking he’ll, I can’t believe I got clipped by a damn bullet .you pull out your burner, dialing phil. When the other end picks up you sigh

“ Can you knock out the cameras for 2minutes?” 

You hear clicking On the other end and use he time to You look yourself over , taking in your appearance; your legs are cut up from the fences, your dress has your blood splattered all over it, and your at, is still currently pouring blood from the gunshot wound. It was only a graze, but from the amount of blood you know it’s deep. 

Coulsons voices steadies you a bit,” you got 2 minutes starting now.”

You  cover the graze with your hand and  move to the back door, leaning your weight against the door as it swings open. Steves eyes widen when he sees your state

“ Get me into the shower, now. We don’t have much time.” Your words fade out towards the end and your vision goes hazy. Your eyes go shut as your body gives out, barely landing in Steves arms instead of the floor.


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