Lying Is The Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off (Sebastian Stan x Reader)
A/N: I honestly have no idea what this is bC I wrote in just now lol. I figured what the heck right haha (: also I had to rush bC of my lima bean attention span. I may or may not make this into another series (;I hope you guys like it! ENJOY! -Delilah ❤
You stared down at the glowing computer screen in complete boredom.
It was spring break, yet instead of partying it up like usual nineteen year olds, you were tucked away in your room on the Internet.
The sounds of the rain blowing against your bedroom window was the only audible thing in the room besides the Twilight movie playing in the background. Taking a sip of your wine, you clicked away.
Omegle was literally the poorest excuse for entertainment. There was nothing but either perverts, psychopaths and obnoxious teenagers that screamed “send nudes!” Which was the complete opposite of what you planned to do.
But this site was new, it still allowed you to talk to strangers, as there were no profile pictures, but you could see their usernames. After typing in the first thing that came to your mind, you finalized your profile and started chatting.
Immediately, you were reconnected to the chatting page, where the familiar words typed out.
“You are now chatting with a stranger, say hi!”
Princess97: hi (:
You watched as the stranger began typing.
SexySeaBass82: hey. (-:
Princess97: sooo I’m kinda new to this lol.
SexySeaBass82: same. gosh I feel so old.
Princess97: oh? how old are you?
SexySeaBass82: 34. you?
Your eyebrows instantly raised. He was a bit older than you expected. You didn’t think anything of it, though. You were just chatting, for the love of god.
Princess97: wowwww I thought you were actually old for a second. (;
SexySeaBass82: lol you sure it doesn’t bother you?
Princess97: cross my heart. (-;
SexySeaBass97: thank god lol. you’re the first decent dame i’ve met on here.
You don’t know how it happened, but you and the mysterious SexySeaBass82 ended up chatting for hours. You found out he lived in New York, which was pretty far from your hometown. He was a really big Marvel fan, especially when it came to the Winter Soldier.
The guy had a huge hard on for him.
SexySeaBass82: all i’m saying is, the actor who plays him is 100% the hottest hands down.
Princess97: you mean Steven Stan?
SexySeaBass82: his name is Sebastian Stan lol. and he’s gonna win an oscar this year. just you wait.
Princess97: the guy who plays captain america is hotter.
You knew that would get him. You let out a giggle as you saw him replying rapidly.
SexySeaBass82: UM ARE U BLIND?
SexySeaBass82: SEBASTIAN IS A DIME OK?
SexySeaBass82: i cannot believe you said that. smh.
Princess97: ok, ok. he’s sort of hot.
The reply you got was almost instant.
SexySeaBass82: YES! mission accomplished! (;
After a few more exchanged words, you said your goodbyes and you watched as his status went from online to offline.
You plopped onto your bed with a content sigh. It was completely irrational, but you really wanted to talked to the mysterious man again. You guys were practically the same person, just at different ages. And you were pretty sure he was just bored like you were.
You closed your eyes, letting the exhaustion of the day pull you under.
Little did you know, the man on the other side of the world was lying in his own bed, smiling like a dork before drifting off to sleep.
Thanks for helping me out with my 15-Minute “Masterpiece” (round 2) prompt! (For those of you unfamiliar with my 15-Minute Masterpieces, they are one-shots I write for at least 15 minutes, with no beta, and light editing. Basically a brain dump to help get my writing wheels turning again.)
Kath, I bet you didn’t think I would go in this direction…
Here’s a little Captain Charming for you because it’s Friday! (Rated PG, ~745 words)
Look At Your Mate
“What’s this?” Killian asked, a look of amused suspicion on his face.
David had just thrust a small package into his hand and nodded at it, then stood back a pace, folding his arms over his chest.
“What’s it look like?” David asked with a huff.
The baby giggled from where he was tossing blocks out of his play pen at his father’s feet. David took the opportunity to avoid looking directly at Killian who stood there, eyebrow raised.
“It’s not my birthday.”
“Not so far as you remember anyway.” David shot back with a snort.
Shrugging, Killian chuckled. “Fair point. Maybe it is my birthday.”
“Just open it already,” David muttered, rolling his eyes.
Using his hook, Killian pulled the tape away from what was a rolled up paper bag and then gently shook it open to reveal a red box and a citrusy, musky scent wafting up at him.
Killian pulled the box out and tossed the bag on the table, all the while perplexed as he read the label. “Soap… on a rope?” he asked.
“Yeah!” David said, his enthusiastic grin sliding away in exchange for a nonchalant shrug. “I saw it at the drugstore and thought you might like it.” David tapped the box with his finger. “Look, there’s a ship on the label. Thought it kinda looked like The Jolly Roger.”
“Aye, mate, I noticed.” Killian read aloud from the box and shook his head in disbelief. “‘Old Spice?’ Are you disparaging my age or the way I smell?” he laughed.
David sighed. “No. Neither! I was just trying… you know what?” He reached over and snatched the box of soap out of Killian’s hand. “Nevermind. I’ll keep it for—”
“No, no, no, no, no,” Killian interrupted, holding his hand up to stop David from continuing. “It was a lovely gesture, and I am flattered you thought of me when you saw this…soap. On a…rope.”
Retrieving his gift back from David, Killian wedged the box between his left bicep and his chest and opened it, fishing out the cream-colored round of soap. He hung the rope from his finger and gave it a little twirl. “I look forward to using it,” he said with a nod. “Thank you.”
David slapped Killian on the shoulder. “Don’t mention it.”
A few days later, the two men were helping Emma wrangle three rowdy and inebriated former Musketeers into the squad car to return them to their lodgings after a particularly raucous gathering at the Rabbit Hole. They weren’t belligerent so much as unruly, and at one point, David lost his balance when Porthos attempted to put Aramis into a friendly headlock, sending the two of them careening toward Killian who had been keeping Aramis mostly upright.
“Son of a bitch!”
Killian managed to right David after he awkwardly dodged the burly Porthos, who toppled over onto Aramis. The sheriff and the pirate let the two swordsmen sort themselves out and finally spill into the backseat of the squad car where a drowsy Athos was waiting, his head pressed against the glass, and a glare directed at them like the point of a rapier.
Emma was coming around the back of the cruiser, making sure everyone was ok when Killian caught the look of confusion on her face.
“Dad? What are… Are you sniffing Killian?”
Killian glanced behind him to catch David, eyes closed, and in the middle of a deep inhale.
Chuckling, Killian asked, “So, which is it, mate? Do I smell old or spicy?”
David grinned. “Spicy.”
Emma said with a soft snort, “You two are weird. I’ll take my chances with Huey, Dewey, and Louie over there.” She walked back over to the driver’s side and opened the door.
“Aye, but they won’t smell as good as I do, love.”
Nodding in agreement, David called out “It’s true!”
Emma rolled her eyes and got into the car, turning on the flashing lights as she revved the engine.
“What kind of soap do you think would be good for me?” David asked, as he and Killian walked toward the squad car.
“Sheep dip,” Killian responded, not missing a beat.
David opened the passenger door and gave Killian a shove. “You think you’re so funny, don’t you?”
“Aye, funny and fragrant,” Killian said, sliding into the front seat next to Emma, leaving just enough room for David.
just downloaded the best distraction free writing app - it’s a google chrome extension. it’s called Writer and i can get all my documents from google drive onto this program, and it is literally just a blank page where i can write and i can get it to make typewriter sounds too like whoa
lmao i sound like i’m advertising for them but i’m really not, i’m just super excited about it
(1/2) I have a crack fic I'm working on and I thought you might enjoy it: the story starts with Emmanuel Gregor, a newly turned american who has been accused of fraternizing with werewolves by the volturi. He does the only thing he can think of when he's brought in front of the kings, he asks for a lawyer and is a lil afraid when Cauis starts to curse.
(2/2) Enter Miriam McDonovan, a vampiric lawyer whose job is to interpret The Law and find ways to protect her clients all the while her wedding planner wife sends her cute text messages about what their kitten is up to around the house. She is also Cauis’s archnemesis, or at least one of many. I don’t have much of a storyline rn but I just thought I’d share for your amusement.
Ahhhhh, this is adorable and hilarious, I am screaming. It’s the most American thing in the world to immediately demand a lawyer and get super-litigious at the first sign of trouble. Also, Caius needs more nemeses who are not werewolves and who oppose him in normal ways.
(Is it bad that I kind of want Miriam’s life? Granted, I’m buried in law job applications and I can only think huh, being undead would probably mean less crying and falling asleep while filling these out. But still, she seems like she has herself together.)
Thank you for sharing this idea with me. If you ever post this story, extra-please pass on the link :3
Your writing should have a warning, like... tfw you know you should close the window but you can't so you sit in public and keep reading and try not to embarrass yourself because holy fuck pia
Omg this is so nice. I mean less so for you because like obviously you don’t want to be reading the most explicit things in public like I get that I’ve been there, I’ve had fics like ‘hahaaaa I can’t read this around PEOPLE but I have to know what HAPPENS NEXT’ and just *quietly rolls around you.*
Today is the day on which I hit 100 followers more than I had before I posted my first flinthamilton fanart (that was a complicated sentence?) That means almost a third of my followers is here because of Black Sails. FUCKEN AWESOME
Thank all of you for being interested in the stuff I draw :D I feel like my efforts truly pay off when I see nice tags and messages :”) It’s just gREAT to be part of a fandom that is so friendly and responsive, I love each and every one of you folks keep being awesome yo
Oml this hiatus is going to end me. Could you do 32 and 38 w/ love square? (As one story or not its up to you)
I STARTED THIS AND TUMBLR DELETED IT I HATE MY LIFE and I did them separately ^_^
“I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.” with Adrienette
Marinette dashed up the stairs, then grabbed Adrien’s arm. “We have to get out of here,” she told him. He looked shocked, as if something was colossally wrong, more than any akuma. “Come on, we can’t just stand here.”
He nodded, though ended up leading her back down the stairs. They dashed into a classroom, and Marinette tried to come up with an excuse to hide him and go outside. She needed to transform. Where is that darn cat?
“Marinette, you should hide. I’ll go find a teacher,” he told her.
She gaped. “No way! I can go find a teacher, you stay here.”
He shook his head. “I can’t let you do that, it’s dangerous.”
A flare of anger rose up in her throat. “I could say the same for you.”
The two jumped as a column of flames shot towards them. They took off, running side by side. Marinette couldn’t even find it in herself to feel nervous around him.
“Ugh, students. Useless little beasts,” the voice of the akuma said. “I’ll lock you up in the dragon’s lair where you belong!” The akumatized teacher shot forward, catching the two of them off guard. Using extremely accurate shots, she forced them towards an open door on their right. And as soon as they dashed in, she closed the closet door and locked the two of them inside.
“Well that’s brilliant,” Marinette growled.
“We need to get out of here,” Adrien said, looking panicked. She turned to him, eyes wide.
“Are you…claustrophobic?” she asked.
“A little…but mainly…I….”
Marinette couldn’t wait for the rest of his explanation. She turned to the door, hearing screams from outside. The akuma’s maniac laughter rang through the halls. Growling again, Marinette picked up her foot and tested the closet door. She backed up a few steps, causing Adrien to yelp. Then with deadly aim, she kicked the door open with a powerful sidekick.
The door flew open, the area she kicked in splinters. It did sting a bit as she wasn’t Ladybug, but she was rather proud of the well placed kick. She turned to Adrien, who was pale as a ghost.
“I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.” came his blunt statement.
Marinette’s eyes widened again, and her face burned. He started to blush as well, not saying anything. She managed to stammer something unintelligible, then took off running to find somewhere to transform.
Her head was not really in the fight that day, not even when Chat Noir joined her. Actually, he looked just as flustered…
“You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.” with Marichat
Marinette groaned, hearing the sounds of crashes outside. It was their second akuma of the week, and she hadn’t eaten breakfast or lunch yet. She was just about to, and now she had to go and fight.
Transforming, she took off outside to find the source of the crashing. A speeding man crashed into storefront after storefront, stealing things from every window.
“I will get whatever I want, whenever I want!” he declared.
“No need to act like the mayor’s daughter!” Ladybug called to him. The man glowered in her direction.
“You can’t beat me!” he declared. He sped towards her, landing quick punches and kicks around her in a circle. A bit disoriented, she grabbed for him and managed to kick him in the stomach. He went skidding backwards, then glared and started for her again.
She managed to tangle him up with her yo-yo, then reached for his goggles, which she figured had the akuma. He kept shifting his head so she couldn’t reach them, infuriating her further.
Finally, her leather-clad partner showed up and grabbed them off his head for her. Ladybug smashed it under her foot, then cleansed the akuma.
“I wasn’t even needed,” Chat joked.
“No way, I couldn’t get those goggles off,” Ladybug admitted. “I gotta go.” She ran into a nearby alleyway to detransform, dizzy from lack of food and from physical exertion.
“Marinette, are you okay?” Tikki asked. Marinette nodded woozily, starting back for her house.
Her vision started to get blurry, and the last thing she remembered before her world turned to black was a familiar sensation of leather gloves catching her.
When she woke up, she groaned. Her eyes focused, and she noticed she was leaning on someone’s shoulder. She jolted up, realizing it was Chat Noir.
“Easy there,” he told her. “You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”
“Ah…thank you Chat Noir,” she managed with a nervous laugh. “What time is it?”
“You have half an hour before your lunch ends,” he responded.
“Ah, I have to get home and eat. Erm, thanks again.”
She dashed off again, thoroughly embarrassed for the day.
Here is a short list of writers to follow this year if you aren’t following them already. These are just a few blogs that I personally enjoy and want other people to be aware of. Don’t miss out on this goodness.
@chanyeolspoutaka my best dream and worst nightmare. Writes for SHINee, Exo, Big Bang, and GOT7. Go learn a thing or two from her. She is phenomenal. My FAVORITE when it comes to reader/idol scenarios.
@iskpoptrashaka writes for too many groups to mention. Just know she writes for your faves!! ALL OF THEM.
@smutfictionaddictedaka so nice, so thoughtful, just plain lovely. Writes for multiple groups and writes for poc readers, thick readers, basically she’s out here repping for people who often get left out. She’s amazing, go check her out.
Obviously all of these people write for SHINee or have written at least one thing about SHINee. Though some of these people write for a lot of other groups as well. (And a reminder that they don’t just write smut. Some of these people pour their hearts and souls into angst and fluff and other original content!) Read some stuff by these people. You might find a new favorite writer. And if you know them already go read more from them.
Just remember to show these and all your favorite writers plenty of love. Be respectful and considerate of these humans who have feelings and lives outside of their blogs. Don’t harass them, or send requests to closed inboxes. Leave feedback and let them know that you liked their work.
I’ve recently been writing a book which surrounds an LGBT+ group going through what is essentially a magical combat school, so I wanted to have some poly characters there as well! But I’m not poly myself, so I’m worried I’m going to get it all wrong. I was going to have three characters that were all together (a triad?), two boys and a girl. Do you have any advice I should keep in mind while writing them? Should I be doing this at all? Thank you!!
That sounds like such a fun book! I definitely think it is okay, even awesome, for people to write about characters who are different from themselves - as long as it’s done sensitively and realistically! I think “please don’t write about XYZ type of people in a stereotyped, offensive, or damaging way” is a far cry from “please don’t write about XYZ type of people unless you are one.”
One thing to keep in mind is that polyamorous people are just like other people - we react to things pretty much the same way as anyone else, so for the majority of situations that might come up during school or magical combat, there won’t be much of a difference. All the same rules of writing well-rounded, interesting characters still apply. Go ahead and let each of these characters be their unique selves, with identities, interests, and inner lives that aren’t solely defined by their polyamory.
You can always poke around the resources here to get a sense for what’s out there in the realm of polyamorous experience and identity.
When it comes to your fictional triad, think through their specific arrangement: are they all dating each other, or is it three separate inter-linked couples? How do they settle tension or conflict? How do they present their relationship to other people? What do they like to do together? Are they polyfidelitous or do any of the individuals involved date or sleep with other people? How does each individual identify in terms of sexuality and gender expression? Are they pretty insular or relatively independent?
Since your book isn’t a romance that revolves around the formation and maintenance of this triad, you can probably rely on doing situation-specific research for anything that comes up in the natural progression of your story that you have questions about. First, try relying on your own imagination and sense for these characters; then, if you’re struggling to conceptualize how a polyamorous triad might respond to something specific, feel free to kick that question to a polyamory-focused forum or back to this blog!
And when you finish, let me know! If my inbox is any indication, people are hungry for polyamorous and polyamory-positive fiction and media.
First full night’s sleep in over a week and I used the extra brain power to remind people (*couch* men *cough) to better include me if they’re talking about what is essentially my work. Not gonna accept it this time.
“It’s a bit cold to be lying on the ceiling, princess,” Chat told her, grinning as she looked up at him. A completely clear sky, shining with stars, gazed down on them. Marinette giggled, gesturing for him to lie down next to him.
“Maybe, but it’s so much fun to stargaze. Why don’t you join me?”
Well it was a little more than three sentences :P Hope you enjoyed!
SO. I just hit a kinda cool milestone?? I never really expected this blog to get a whole lot of traction or many partners because the fandom is so tiny… but I am HAPPY to say that I was wrong!! I still can’t believe that I have so many awesome and diverse people to write with – and that y’all have accepted Charlie Harris (and his ghosts) into your hearts and minds. He’s become one of my favorite fictional characters ever and one of the most satisfying blogs I’ve ever had. That wouldn’t have happened without all you lovely people! So, below are just a few of the people who have been extra special to me over the past year and a half: