avocado maybe

I wonder if one of the causes of animosity towards “entitled millennials” is that many millennials are poor people who look rich.  There’s this growing class of people who wear nice clothes, have fancy new electronic gadgets, go out to eat nice food… and will never own a home or have a retirement fund or put a child through college.

It’s so easy to say “if you cut down on the avocado toast maybe you could save up”, and so hard to accept that a house these days is fifty thousand avocado toasts, and that’s why so many of us have just given up.  We don’t treat ourselves because we think the world will take care of us when we get older; we treat ourselves because we know it won’t.  Might as well feel and look good on the way down.

chewelbwessem  asked:

How DARE you insult avocados, they are HEALTHY AND DELICIOUS! Have you EVER eaten a ripe avocado? That's what I thought bitch. I eat avocados WHOLE EVERY DAY with a SPOON because they are nutritious and delicious. Also?,,?,?, PINEAPPLE IS THE REASON PIZZA EXISTS. God I can NOT deal with this discourse right now

Avocados taste bland as hell and the only reason I don’t like it is because my mom used to tell me it was baby poo when I was younger and I just have war flashbacks every time avocado goes anywhere near my mouth but pineapple pizza is fucking disgusting I hate warm fruit and the only fruit allowed on pizza is tomatoes and that’s IT, NO pineapple, you know who eats pineapple pizza??? Heathens. It doesn’t taste good at all and belongs in the trash. The only reason people eat pineapple pizza is because the purpose of pineapple pizza is a deterrent if there’s pineapple on there, your pizza stays untouched because no one else will touch the nasty ass pizza, liking it is a beneficial adaptation

xswanlegs  asked:

“Remember Me" - Alistair

the elf is old, once-blond hair now nearly white, skin leathery but body still lithe and strong. alistair might not even recognize him, if not for the inked curves along the side of his face and the way he carries himself, just as cocky and deadly as he’s always been.

alistair asks the barkeep to send the elf a drink on him, and hopes that zevran still likes that rivaini wine he brought out at camp so long ago.

when the wine is sent over, zevran arches an eyebrow in pleased surprise. the barkeep gestures in alistair’s direction, and zevran glances over, cocking his head interestedly. alistair knows he bears little resemblance to the warden zevran traveled with twenty-some years ago. he’s scruffier, hair longer and face scarred. he lost an eye fighting some darkspawn years back, and he wears an eyepatch now.

the appraising look zevran gives him, however, suggests that the changes are not for the worse. he slides onto the stool next to alistair and raises his glass.

“to whom do i owe the pleasure?”

alistair chuckles a bit, self-conscious in a way he hasn’t felt in a very long time.

“an old friend,” he says, and clinks his glass with zevran’s. “tell me, zevran, what have you been up to since the fifth blight?”

his voice hasn’t changed as much as his appearance, and he watches as shocked recognition sweeps over zevran’s face.

and then, a broad smile, and a firm, warm hand clasped over his arm.

Avocados with SpideyPool
  • Wade: What took you so long? (starts plating food)
  • Peter: (pulls an avocado out of grocery bag)
  • Wade: You know I hate them! (places hands on hips)
  • Peter: I was just thinking how convenient it would be if we could get these two wrinkly avocados to fuck gently maybe your face would return to normal.
  • Wade: I was thinking the same thing (pulls out avocado suit).
  • Peter: You bought suits for us to fuck in? (starts undressing)
  • Wade: No,just you. Hey, you know what, I have a better idea for those avocados!
  • Peter: Yeah? (pulls on suit, adjusting it)
  • Wade: Yes! Just thinking about how many I can shove up your ass. You little piece of shit! (throws down apron)

anonymous asked:

🌼 I want to eat healthier but I get hungry often between meals and I HATE salads but my mom seems to think that if you want to eat healthier to lose weight you need salad EVERY DAY and no snacks between meals (I guess I don't like salads much because of her). so I guess my main question is can I eat healthy and eat enough to be full and eat food I actually enjoy?

You by no means need to eat salad every day. People like salad because it doesn’t have a lot of calories and it fills you up temporarily… but leaves you hungry a few hours later. We often equate “healthy” eating with eating less, but that doesn’t need to be the case! You’ll be better off making sure that you’re getting enough of what you need rather than making sure you’re eating a certain number of calories. While portion control is important, (not over-eating, etc.) less is not always more. If you’re eating something healthy, eat what you need to to get full. A few heaping handfuls of carrots is not bad for you, just because it’s a lot of food. 

Snacks are not the enemy, as long as they’re good for you. Almonds, pistachios, walnuts, peanuts (rly any nuts that don’t have a ton of salt on them), carrots, cucumber, celery, peanut butter, dark chocolate, avocado toast maybe w/ an egg.. my personal faves are edamame, apples rings w/ peanut butter and dark chocolate chips and homemade guac! There are soooo many options for good snacks between meals that won’t set you back on your healthy eating track and will tide you over until your next meal. 

A lot of research has been done into the whole several smaller meals over the course of the day vs. three larger meals thing as well. I recommend looking into it and seeing if that’s something that might work better for you. 

Here’s some healthy snacking resources! Sorry they’re.. literally all buzzfeed, they tell me what to eat 2/3rds of the time, but if none of these strike ur fancy just google “healthy snacks” and behold! Best of luck!!

claire :-)

if your mom’s concerned/always on your back, maybe you could convince her to take you to see a nutritionist! they’ll help you work out a meal plan with healthy, filling meals you like and I promise they won’t just tell you to eat veggies. 
-byrne 

2

Verity Vine: And you’re not going to, like, set me up with one of your friends?

Sangria Plum: We would never.

Hazel: We barely even have friends. Just you know… us, and Peach Puff, and probably Iris too. And maybe Avocado? Just six friends, hanging in the woods. Looking at the stars and… stuff.

Vegan recess/lunch ideas for school/work

It’s no secret that finding things to pack for recess and lunch can be tricky sometimes. All the most convenient and conventional ideas just aren’t suitable for somebody doing their best to live a whole food plant based lifestyle. I’ve been out of school for three years now but I’ve been trying to prepare lunch before work lately so I don’t find myself stuck and needing to buy something on the spot. Hopefully I can give you a few ideas and maybe even help myself out for future reference :)

1. Fruit

Like any lunch, this might require some preparation ahead of time but this is the most simple idea that I have. My favourite fruit to have for lunch is bananas. I find that about 11 is perfect for me to eat throughout the day at work. I also love mandarins and apples. Any fruit that comes with its own natural, convenient packaging is the best. If you have some time to chop things up, watermelon is a delicious snack and so are strawberries.

2. Rice

Rice is one of my favourite things to take to work for a few reasons- it’s cheap, it’s easy and it’s fast. I put the rice cooker on when I get up to make breakfast and it’s ready by the time I need to leave. All I do it stir through some herbs and some canned tomatoes and spinach and I’m done. You could also do the same with corn pasta. These still taste really good cold too so they’re great for when you don’t have access to a microwave.

3. Smoothies

Some smoothies I prefer to drink cold but some I could honestly drink at just about any temperature. Here are a few that I’ve taken for lunch in the past that tasted just fine hours after preparation-

Banana mylk-
All you need is bananas and water. If you want to spice it up a little with vanilla or cinnamon, go right ahead because those are delicious also. 8 bananas to a liter of water and you’re ready to take on the rest of your day.

Orange-
Literally just blend oranges. I prefer this to juice because I looooove love love fibre. This will fill you up and oranges taste great at room temp.

Datorade-
If you haven’t tried this yet, you’re missing out! 20 dates + a liter of water = caramel for lunch. Mhmm you heard correctly. Again, cinnamon and vanilla- both amazing in this but totally optional.

Pineapple and strawberry-
Just blend a whole pineapple with as many strawberries as you like (I usually use heaps because they’re my absolute favourite) and you’re good to go.

4. Wraps

Veggie wraps can take a little preparation sometimes because otherwise you’ll end up with spinach and tomato and maybe some cucumber if you’re lucky. There is nothing wrong with this if it’s what you love but I think if I was in the middle of a hard day of learning and was super hungry only to remember that that’s all I brought, I’d probably be a little disappointed. I suggest that to take your veggie wrap game to the next level, take a couple of minutes the night before to prepare a couple of things. This is what I’d do-

- grate some carrot, slice some tomato, cucumber, capsicum (bell pepper), cabbage, spinach, lettuce, kale WHATEVER VEGGIES YOU HAVE just go for it. A little bit of everything is amazing. Also maybe some avocado! Toss these all together and store in a Tupperware container.
- blend some chickpeas, tahini + lemon juice. However much tahini and lemon juice you use is totally up to you. You can add some water to thin it out a little if you like and garlic if you like garlic. This is just lazy, low fat hummus. I would start with one can of chickpeas, one tablespoon of tahini and a dash of lemon and see how it tastes. Scoop into a little container.

Now all you have to do is bring these to school with your wraps and assemble as you eat them. Don’t be afraid to use your fingers. Tossing your salad in the same container means that you get an even distribution of everything while taking the components separately means that you don’t ever have a soggy wrap come lunch/recess. You can do the same thing with rice/corn cakes or crackers too!

5. Left overs!

If you’re a person who makes delicious dinners, start making a little extra and taking left overs with you the next day. Dinners that are great for this include- stir fry, vegan pizza, shepherds pie, veggie soup and so many more.

6. Bliss balls

Bliss balls are perfect for recess and for snacking on throughout the day when you need some more carbs to get you through. There are also so many fun things you can add in to them. You can find the recipe a couple of posts back with some fluffy pink nice cream but that is just the beginning. The options are endless. In the past I’ve used cashews, goji berries and cranberries and they have been so so SO good! I also love using a lot of maple syrup (slight addiction). If you love almond butter, go for it. If you want to keep it low fat, load those bad boys up with plenty of dates and other dried fruit and oats.

It’s getting late and that’s all I have for the time being but when I think of more ideas, you guys will be the first to know! I’d also love to hear what your favourite lunches for school or work are so let me know :)

smallcoffee  asked:

I’m sorry you’re struggling with whether or not to eat- i HAAAATE when that strikes. But it’s important to realize that healthy foods are nothing to feel guilty about! Your entire body functions 10000x when it has healthy food in its system. Try eating a little portion of something like quinoa, or oatmeal, or avocado toast. Maybe some soup or something! &any time you feel like shit for eating, remind yourself that healthy food is nothing to feel guilty about. You deserve to eat & you’ve got this

Thank you sosososososo much, princess. c’: I know in my heart I need to eat in order to study, and that what I’ve eaten isn’t anything to feel guilty over, if I eat more I won’t gain weight and I’ll probably still lose. Its my silly little brain that mistakes almonds and veggies for poison.
Its like trying to convince yourself a hallucination isn’t real.

Anxiety is hitting hard right now. I just woke up from a 2 hour nap, ate some chips with avocado, and maybe that made me feel sick. I have two hours till my last group for internship. I’m debating just going back to sleep lmao but I really should finish this assignment I have due tomorrow night. Akjasdflaskdljf why is life hard

nothing will ever taste better to me than rice with some spicy shit and some crunchy shit in there.

white rice with garlic chili rooster sauce and some shredded carrot?? maybe some avocado?? BOSS

brown rice with cheese and hot sauce and some corn or beans? WHAT UP

basmati rice with some peanut sauce and whatever else?? NICE GET OVER HERE

miss me with that “using pots and pans other than a rice cooker” shit and that “balanced nutrition” shit

anonymous asked:

can you give us a full day of what you eat with whole30? im interested in trying it too and was wondering what it looked like

sure! I’m just about done now but here’s what a typical day looked like for me. my eating schedule is not what the makers of whole30 want t to be (I eat often as opposed to only thrice daily) but I’m not a fan of deprivation or of overstuffing, so here it is.

breakfast: fried egg, half avocado, sweet potato with sunbutter

snack: Apple

lunch: cauliflower fried rice w/ vegetables, sesame oil, and a couple scrambled eggs, plus a banana

snack: couple handfuls of almonds plus a piece of fruit

pre-run: Small bowl of unsweetened applesauce

dinner: tinfoil salmon, sautéed Brussels sprouts, a baked potato, and maybe some grapes

pre-bed: almonds/pistachios, an egg + half avocado, and maybe one last piece of fruit

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH ( obriensnipples ) U NERD

HAVE SOME CHEF!DEREK AND CHEF!STILES

Stiles glares at a crate of avocados.

He reaches out to test another one, squeezing it gently to test for its ripeness, but once again it turns out hard. He’s pretty sure he’s been through three fourths of the crate at this point and all of them are too firm. Really, he should have bought some when he last went shopping to give them time to ripen, but, then again, his cravings can be unpredictable at times. And he really wants fresh guacamole, like, today.

Sighing, he considers abandoning the farmers market and braving the local chain grocery store, but just as he’s reaching out to try one last avocado, someone else’s hand darts out to grab it.

“Hey!” Stiles yelps as his hand is knocked out of the way. He turns his glare on the intruder, losing hold of his anger for a moment as he takes in the man’s broad chest and perfectly groomed stubble.

However, as soon as he sees the avocado skin flex perfectly under the man’s fingers, he just about sees red.

“Oh my god,” he hisses, launching himself at the avocado. “Give me that!”

“What the hell?” the guy replies, jerking his hands away and holding the avocado away from Stiles’ reach. “What the fuck is your problem?”

“I have spent the last hour searching the entire market for a ripe avocado and you just waltz on in and find it on the first try,” Stiles growls, glare still sharp.

“So?” Tall, Dark, and Stubbly asks, unmoved.

“So don’t you think it’s only fair – ” Stiles starts, but Avocado Asshole cuts him off.

“No,” he snorts, placing the avocado in a plastic bag and heading over to the stall owner to pay. “It’s not my fault you suck at finding the best produce.”

“I’m clearly just unlucky!” Stiles shouts at Avocado Asshole’s retreating back, hands curled up into fists at his sides.

He finally finds ripe, but badly bruised, avocados at a mega chain grocery store an hour and a half later. However, it’s only once he gets home that he realizes he forgot to get tomatoes.

Fuck his life.

Keep reading

Post-coital Breakfast

Summary: Bond convinces Q that he had only the purest of motives when he snuck downstairs to make French toast on the morning after. 

Notes: Some fluff for @jordankaine <3 


Q wakes, nose twitching, to the scent of vanilla wafting its way up the stairs. Below, he can hear a sizzling skillet and someone singing, something-l’amour-something, in a low, cheerful voice.

Food. Cooking. He blinks his eyes open and turns to the other half of his bed: no one.

Which means…Bond is cooking.  

“No!” Q shouts, shoving his glasses on his face. He leaps out of bed, his mismatched Spiderman socks skidding on the hardwood floor, and thunders down the stairs. “So help me, Bond! You’d better not be doing what I think you’re doing!”

But Q slams past the kitchen doorway and a beautiful, custardy, cinnamon-vanilla smell hits him straight in the face. Bond is—oh, damn—he’s flipping cinnamon-glazed French toast in Q’s cast iron skillet, Q’s best spatula in his hand and Q’s blue TARDIS apron wrapped around his bare chest.

“You shit,” Q breathes, stopped in his tracks. The apron string is tied behind the broad, naked expanse of Bond’s back, a few inches above a pair of blue boxer shorts that Q finds too big on himself and wonderfully obscene on Bond.

Bond had to have heard him coming, but it’s only then that he turns around, robbing Q of the magnificent view of his arse. The smile on his face is a bit too pleased to be innocent. “Something the matter?”

Keep reading

It really irritates me that Claire is apparently not supposed to be a love interest for Matt in the show but they have such HOT, amazing chemistry, AND HAVE INTERACTED ROMANTICALLY, while Karen is supposed to eventually be his love interest (she is in the comics). They don’t really have much romantic or sexual chemistry. But then again, they haven’t really interacted that much outside of just basic work stuff. All we saw were a few moments they had, compared to seeing Karen with Foggy a lot which I ADORE AND CAN TOTALLY GET BEHIND OTP OR BROTP WISE and Matt with Claire. So maybe we will see more of Karedevil and I will be able to get behind it, but they shouldn’t have teased Clairedevil and then say “whoops, not really our intention.” I get it, Claire is supposed to be someone Matt can be completely open and on level-ground with. But shouldn’t that be someone you date, as well? She knows more about him than most people do at this point, besides maybe Foggy. (Avocados at Law bby!) I guess the choice not to get romantically involved is mostly Claire’s because she doesn’t wanna care for someone and see them get hurt constantly and possibly killed, but I’m still bitter. I suppose we’ll just have to see what next season brings for Karedevil and possibly Clairedevil.

Poached Eggs

So eggs are amazing things but I always get bored of scrambled ones (because that used to be all I could make) and I was scared to try anything more complicated. So, I went to the google to try to find any other way that was pretty easy. 

I found poached eggs. Poached eggs are my new passion. Seriously, I thought they were going to be the most difficult thing ever but they aren’t! 

Okay, so all you do is bring a pot of water to an almost boil and then stick something in the pot (like a spoon or a chopstick) and stir it around until you make a mini tornado thing in the pot. Dump an egg into the middle. The closer you get to the water before dropping it, the better luck you’ll have. Also, using a fresh egg will make the results better too. Now just walk away from the pot for four minutes, scoop the egg out or drain the water and VOILA! poached egg!  

(for even more restaurant like results add a small splash of vinegar to the water. Note: I never ever do this because I don’t care if they look pretty)

I like mine with rooster sauce and nutritional yeast but other great options include in ramen, on english muffins with ham and (store bought) hollandaise sauce, or with avocado and tomato and maybe lox or salmon or something. 

But anyway, a poached egg is a pretty simple recipe that doesn’t require chopping or opening jars or standing over a stove for a long time. So hopefully good for (some people’s)  low spoon days. Also eggs can be pretty reasonably priced and if you don’t add gourmet caviar. 

The below link is a list of recipes that include poached eggs, for more inspiration. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/28/poached-egg-recipe_n_4165033.html