Our Story Project
It was my senior year of high school, everything started out great to say the least. I had guy that I was seeing for two years in my life, but during that time moved away to go to college in Wilmington. My grades were good and the thought of going off to college and starting a new life was all I dreamed of. I had the best of friends, and a average home life.
As the school year went on, I found out the guy I was seeing was not all telling me the truth of what has been happening with him and another girl. But it was his second month of him being in college so I forgave him thinking it was just him adjusting and he didn’t really mean it. With the stress of that and college applications getting the best of me, my anxiety started to get worst. So I went to the doctor and therapist, explained my problems and how I feel and got put on depression and anxiety medicine.
Not thinking much about the medicine, my life started to spiral away from me. I truly lost control. The guy I was seeing started seeing someone else and never thought of even telling me. Two years with him, all wasted away to find out it was just a lie. Being rejected from the colleges I have always wanted to get in. Kept going to the doctor, explaining my problems, being put on more medicine to make the problems go away. I started not going to school, making horrible grades. Wondering if I was even going to graduate from high school??? I didn’t care, I didn’t care about my friends. relationships. How I treated myself or others for that matter. I wasn’t the person I knew and loved.
I kept being told by the people closest to me, asking why I have changed so much, when at the time I didn’t even know I did. No one wanted to be around me, so I found new friends, and a new boy, but with the way I was thinking at the time, they weren’t good influences on me. I got arrested (for something minor), starting abusing my drugs and just wanting more, anything to make the pain and feelings go away. I ended up being suicidal. For what reason? I still have no idea.
Two days before graduation, I was told I wasn’t going to walk across the stage with everyone. I was embarrassed, mortified, mad at myself for just giving up years of hard work, for a small time of depression. I cried and cried wondering what on earth I could do to change this. I overdosed on my medicine, sleeping medicine I was prescribed for panic attacks. I could have lost my life right there. The next morning I woke up to my dad and a phone call, it was my school, telling me they figured something out and were able to let walk across the stage and graduate after all.
After this, I got my life together. It was the biggest wake up call of my life. Don’t let depression defeat you, don’t let it bring you down and kill your happiness and everything you worked hard for in life. It’s been almost two months since all of this happened, I have my true friends back, the guy of two years, even though some may not agree with that. And I am happy……I stopped taking my medicine and till this day I can’t decide if that’s what ruined me or if it was just truly me. I wanted to share some of my story to the people who have depression and anxiety and take the medicine they do for it. Fight, fight as much as you can to get threw it, achieve what you need to achieve. Things will work out, things will get better. I promise. Love yourself to the best of your ability and don’t look back, don’t regret it. Build yourself up and conquer what you can without that medicine. Don’t let it get as far as I did, and I hope for the people who do read this and can realize from my mistakes and make there life better.