Best Out-of-Context Lines From Musicals

- “Sit down John, you fat motherfucker!”

- “Screw the middle classes, I will never accept them!”

- “Consider yourself part of the furniture.”

- “Now shut your face.”

- “Henry can’t really stay; he’s got rabies.”

- “I love you even though it does not matter that I still don’t know your name.”

- “The internet is not for porn!”

- “Miss America should just resign!”

- “No one keeps a cow for a friend!”

- “Lot 666 then.”

- “Nothing can bend the will like half-Castilian men!”

- “Sometimes my father appeared to enjoy having children.”

Bootlegs is

P) professional
H) high quality
M) medium quality
L) Low quality

THIS POST IS CONSTANTLY UPDATED

25th Annual Putnam County Spelling
Bee (L)
[Title of Show] (M)
A Chorus Line (L)
A Very Potter Musical (P)
A Very Potter Sequel (P)
A Very Potter Senior Year (P)
A Gentleman’s guide to love and murder (M)
An American In Paris (M)
Anything Goes (M)
American Psycho (M)
American Idiot (L)
Avenue Q OBC (L)
Avenue Q (H)
Bonnie & Clyde OBC (M)
Bonnie & Clyde (M)
Bring it on (p1-p5) (M)
Book of Mormon OBC (M)
Book of Mormon (H)
Book of Mormon w/ Ben Platt (H)
Carrie (L)
Cabaret W/ Emma Stone (M)
Chicago (M)
Cinderella (L)
Cannibal! The Musical (P)
Dirty Dancing (L)
Falsettos OBC (H)
Falsettos Revival OBC (H)
Fun home (M)
Hamilton Chicago (H) Heathers (M)
Heathers w/ Thomas Sanders ((AUDIO))
Heathers read through (M)
Hedwig and the angry inch w/ Andrew Rannells (M)
In the heights W/ Javier Munoz (M)
If/then (M)
Jesus Christ superstar (P)
Kinky boots Pre-Broadway (L)
Legally blonde (P)
Little shop of horrors (M)
Next to normal (H)
Newsies OBC (L)
Newsies (M)
Pokémon Live! (L)
Rent (L)
Spring awakening OBC (M)
Spring awakening (H)
Something rotten (H)
Something Really Rotten (H)
The Addams Family (M)
The Secret Garden (L)
The Phantom Of The Opera (L)
Wicked OBC (L)

Pls message for one !!!!!!YOU CAN ASK FOR BOOTLEGS UP TO FOUR AFTER FOUR ITS TRADE ONLY NO MATTER WHAT YOUR ASKING FOR!!!!!
Renamed Musicals
  • • Les Miserables: Breadsticks Meme Gone Wrong ft. The Only Cop in France.
  • • Miss Saigon: Americans Fuck Shit Up, the musical!
  • • Legally Blonde: This is Harvard, not a Stripper Bar.
  • • Wicked: Misunderstood Green Girl and Sparkly Witch Hide Lesbian Feelings
  • • Little Women: That Story Where All the Girls Fall in Love
  • • Book of Mormon: Spooky Mormon Hell and Crude Gay Humor Clash w/ Sparkly Tuxedoes.
  • • Shrek: Don’t Judge a Book By It’s Cover; Another Show About Diversity.
  • • The Last Five Years: How Not to Adult: A Manual
  • • Joseph and the blah, blah, blah: Fifty Shades of Bible Humor
  • • Suessical: Always Trust that Weird Voice you Hear PS Elephants Can’t Fly
  • • Songs for a New World: I’m Sure There’s a Story Here Somewhere…
  • • Thirteen: Puberty Sucks Plus Jewish Jokes and Weird Sexual Tension
  • • Matilda: We’ll Fight Like Twenty Armies and We Won’t Give up ft. Miss Honey’s Self Esteem Issues.
  • • Spring Awakening: Why Sex Ed Matters, the musical!
  • • Next to Normal: The Story of a Sexy Ghost
  • • Avenue Q: Horney Puppets Use the Internet for Porn and Then Build a School For Monsters.
  • • Children of Eden: Bible fanfiction.
  • • The Drowsy Chaperone: Hallucinations of a Man in a Chair
  • • Violet: Sutton Foster and a Sob Story ft. Indecipherable Accents
  • • Anything Goes: Into the Woods, Except on a Ship
  • • How to Succeed: A Dummies Guide to Making an Ass Out of
  • Yourself
  • • Once on this Island: Why Gods Should Not Interfere With Humans
  • • Into the Woods: Fairytale AU on Crack
  • • Fun Home; Gay Tears, the musical!
  • • In the Heights: Everybody has Issues in the Barrio.
  • • Chess: East West Relations Under Different Masks and Various Plots
  • • RENT: Diversity, Death, and Drugs.
  • • Annie: My Life Sucks: By Me.
  • • Sweeny Todd: Revenge Means Killing Everybody
  • • Young Frankenstein: It Runs in the Family.
Songs to make your Non-Broadway Friends Listen to with no context at all
  • My Unfortunate Erection: 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee
  • Sugar Daddy: Hedwig and the Anrgy Inch
  • Hasa Diga Eebowai: The Book of Mormon
  • Blue: Heathers
  • Totally Fucked: Spring Awakening
  • Black Death: Something Rotten!
  • Friki-friki: Honeymoon in Vegas
  • Spooky Mormon Hell Dream: The Book of Mormon
  • You Can Be As Loud As the Hell You Want: Avenue Q
  • Telly: Matilda
  • Over The Moon: RENT
  • The Ballad of Farquaad: Shrek
  • Magic Foot: 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee
  • The Word of Your Body reprise: Spring Awakening
  • Die Vampire, Die!: [title of show]
  • Something Rotten/Make an Omelette: Something Rotten!
  • Joseph Smith American Moses: The Book of Mormon
  • Hello Little Girl: Into the Woods
  • Angry Inch: Hedwig and the Angry Inch
  • It's Eggs: Something Rotten!
  • The Internet is for Porn: Avenue Q
Most beautiful and inspirational final lines in musicals
  • Heathers: "Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful BEAUTIFUUUUULLL!"
  • Sister Act: "Spread the love around!"
  • Lion King: "Circle of lifeee!!"
  • Hamilton: "Who lives, who dies, who tells your story?"
  • Les Misérables: "tomorrow comes!"
  • Rent: "No day but today"
  • Avenue Q: "Everything in life is only for now"
  • The Book of Mormon: "I STILL HAVE MAGGOTS IN MY SCROOOTUUUUUUUUM!!!"

i have never understood people who think musicals are boring/lame. they get away with way more violence, sex, social commentary, and profanity than mainstream movies do, just because its all done onstage in song form

and thats amazing

Theatre is so amazing actually like

You want a musical about revolting people because they can’t use the bathroom? Got it

A musical with puppets after they get out of college who have upbeat songs about racism, sexualities, and sex? Yep we got it

Maybe one about gay Mormons who love Orlando and Star Wars? You guessed it

Fucking Shrek the musical?? Yeah (and its actually not as shitty as it sounds)

Not two mention a musical that accurately portrays a dysfunctional family due to mental disease?

Rock musical based on presidents lives?

Addams Family and Mathilda the musical? Aight man

Anything you want there’s probably a show about it tbh