avengers file

The Times Clint Barton has Sassed/ Annoyed Steven Grant Rogers #2

Report File by Steve Rogers, written to Tony Stark

Reporting: Clint Barton

Issue: I’m certain he is the one using my credit card to buy Pizza!

Present of incident: Probably everyone, since he buys a ton of pizza, certainly cannot eat it all himself; maybe they know or don’t that he uses my card.

My bank phoned me and asked me about weird transactions that have been going on for a few days, conveniently after my first report file, weird big pizza orders are showing up. I don’t want to point fingers or place blame but I am certain it’s Barton, for starters it could be retaliation because I reported him or some stupid joke; he’s the only one that would do this.  Also, it’s the same pizza place that he usually orders from, his favourite Italian place, I know we all like it but he introduced us to it.

Furthermore, I phoned the pizza place and they tell me the name always changes, it’s never a set name that he orders with a few are; Golden Boy, 90-something-year- old Virgin and what’s became his favourite Bald Eagle Herder. This is EXTREMELY embarrassing for me, also, it’s illegal to use someone’s card without permission, so on top of this and the other report he’s a criminal now. I’ve tried talking to him, he doesn’t listen to me, I’m worried he’s gonna start buying other stuff; highly embarrassing stuff. 

Punishment: I want him to pay me back for all those pizza orders, I worked it all out and it comes to around two-hundred-and-fifty dollars, I want it all back into my account. Like last time, even though the punishment didn’t get done, I want his pizza privileges taken away again.

Additional Notes: This is a very serious matter, I’m also sending this to Phil Coulson, Clint is in violation of the law this time. This is credit fraud, everyone can see this as a joke, and I don’t. I’ve tried seeing the funny side, heck, I even laughed with Sam over the names but over two-hundred dollars has basically been stolen from me.

I know you’re going to show this Clinton also, this is going to be extremely unprofessional of me, but fuck you, Clint! Just you wait, you can hide in the vents eating, basically, my pizza all you want but you gonna have to come out at some point. I’ll be waiting for you.

Thank you – this better get taken seriously – for your time.

   Steven Grant Rogers

(Report One) Inspired by Chatzy and Kik conversations between myself as Steve Rogers and @avenger-fanfic-person as Clint Barton - Rosalee (This one I have made up but honestly, this is something we would talk about in the chat anyway, hope you enjoy these.)

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And you’re pretty fucking proud✌️

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Originally posted by fox-alfa

we’ve had a clone club dinner and even a clone club dance party, but what if orphan black gave us a clone club fight scene? picture sarah, cosima, alison, helena, rachel, tony, and krystal all teaming up, each wielding weapons ranging from frying pans to needles and SCIENCE! to guns and knives, all using their specific skillsets to take down hordes of Neolutionists Gone Wrong while exchanging banter and crushing their enemies.

The Importance of Paperwork Part 1

Doing more with that flash fiction, the way everyone requested.

The day after Loki tried to conquer New York, the Avengers gathered on the deck of the battered helicarrier to welcome Doctor Foster and her assistant.

When the women came off the jet that brought them in, Thor happily swept his Jane up in his arms. Darcy Lewis absently stepped around their embrace while fiddling with her iPod.

Tony Stark stepped forward hesitantly, sorrow on his face. He opened his mouth to speak, but she turned away from him and started walking to the nearest door. He gaped after her before following, along with the others.

Inside the doorway Darcy hesitated, looking down both of the corridors she could take.

“Which way, Jay?” she asked.

She appeared to get an answer through her iPod because she turned right. The Avengers followed in confusion.

“Where are we going?” Tony asked.

“A high security medical room,” she said.

“Why?” he asked again.

“Because Pip’s 54b hasn’t been filed even though everyone else’s who died has,” she said.

“What’s a 54b?” Tony asked.

“A piece of paperwork that starts the official declaration of death for a Shield agent. Maybe? I’m not super sure, it was really boring.” Darcy said, turning down another hallway.

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Imagine being a master thief, able to steal anything without being caught. One day you come home to find the house wrecked and your 12 year old sister missing. A man with some of his goons says that he’s kidnapped your sister and will torture her if you don’t steal something for him. He wants you to steal some secret files from S.H.I.E.L.D. and in return he’ll give you back your sister unharmed. He says you have two weeks to bring him the files or the deals off and you never see you little sister again. Figuring the easiest way to get the files is by hacking into Tony Starks computer. Later that night you sneak into the tower and begin doing your work. Nearly finished you’re distracted by the sound of a door opening and look up to see a very confused and shocked Loki standing before you. He immediately takes charge and starts throwing attacks at you, which you easily dodge. All the ruckus wakes up the Avengers who soon come to the same room. Putting your hands up in surrender they began to ask you a dozen questions in aggressive tones, to which you reply by nodding your head to the computer. One of them walks over to the monitor and quickly reads it before turning it around. On it the sentence “Help, they have my sister”, blinks in bold letters. Everyone’s left in silence when you smoothly reply, “If I really didn’t want to be caught, you think it’s be this easy to get me? I am a master thief after all.”

I need to follow more people. since restarting my blog, I’ve lost a ton of blogs to follow. If you frequently post about tow of these or more, reblog, like or follow me or whatever and I’ll follow you back.


Avengers

Agents of Shield 

Agent Carter

Marvel universe in general including any of the movies, comics books. I just need more.

Sense8

Kingsman

Orphan Black

Jeremy Renner

Fall Out Boy

My Chemical Romance

X-Files

Baking, cakes etc

The sequel to “The Soldier’s Plan” as requested by nerd-kat–hell-yes. Enjoy!

I freaking loved The Soldier’s Plan! That was so adorable and clever. Would you mind maybe making a second part to it about what happens after the mini dance party?

“The Soldier’s Plan” (Part 2)

Part 1

The dance party had gone on for much longer than you had anticipated. Steve was dragged around by Natasha for a couple of hours and whenever he got a break, you began dancing with Pietro to avoid him. Truthfully, you felt slightly proud for being able to get such a jealous expression out of the legendary Steve Rogers.

When everyone finally admitted that enough was enough, the Avengers began filing out of your room. Taking the CD out of the stereo, you returned to the cabinet where you kept the cases. Reaching up, you attempted to grab the case for your ‘Queen – Greatest Hits’ album but as a result of Pietro being the one who obtained it, the box was little out of your reach.

Suddenly you felt two large hands on your waist as Cap – who you hadn’t realised was still in the room – lifted you higher. After a surprised whimper, you soon retrieved the case, placed the disc inside and returned it to the shelf. Steve then let you to the ground.
“Hey.” He said with a smile. You smiled back – unsure what else to say.
“So…” Steve began.
“We never actually finished our dance.”
“We did sort of get side-tracked, didn’t we?”
“Yes, and I still need some rehearsal.” He reminded you before placing a pointed finger on his chin.

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3

Requested by anonymous


The Avengers filed into the tower, going into the elevator and eventually entering the lounge area. Only Bucky seemed to explore the room with purpose. “Um… Jarvis, do you know where Y/N is?” He speaks loud and clearly, still not use to this form of modern technology.

“I’m here,” you cry out, your voice quieter than you wanted it to be. Everyone else turned to see you first, most of them letting out shocked gasps as they saw your state.

Bucky had left you on a six month mission but the night before you’d had sex, either you forgot to take your pill or the condom snapped or the two of you were just really unlucky, but now you were six months pregnant, showing, and really nervous about telling Bucky.

He turned around and when he saw you his eyes widened, “Y/N?” He gasped and you couldn’t tell whether he was happy to see you or not.

Without thinking you held out a picture which was a scan of the baby, “meet Bucky Jr,” he walked closer and took the picture out of your hand, his mouth falling open at the image.

“It’s a boy?” He asked, you simply nodded your head and swallowed air. The way he was acting only made you feel more scared. And then suddenly he smiled, a big grin that almost didn’t fit on his face. “It’s a boy!” He cheered, slamming his lips against your sand gently placing his hand on your enlarged belly. He moved down and nuzzled his head into your neck, having to work to hide the tears which you felt on our bare skin, those were happy tears. 

After sorting himself out properly he turned to the rest of the group, his smile once again growing larger and larger, “I’m going to be a dad!”

The Avengers cheered, each one of them congratulating you and Bucky. Though soon after the merriment Tony brought up what you were going to name the baby, saying that Tony was the most befitting name for a brilliant child. Then Thor spoke up, saying that his name was much better and for children that will grow up to be warriors, “like there mothers” he’d added, hoping that would sway you more. After that an argument began, everyone yelling over one another, trying to decide the best name.