Avengers Assemble: Second Round!

Season 2, Episode 1: “The Arsenal”

We start Season Two with Thor and the Hulk being adorable and hilarious and the bestest bros ever. They’re always picking on each other and it seriously is one of the most compelling reasons to watch this frivolous cartoon. It’s good to note that when they have tinier missions, Steve is often paired up with Sam. That makes me crazy happy. 

And without Steve, Tony’s awfully lonely. Clint gets Natasha, Thor gets the Hulk, and Sam gets Steve. What the hell is Tony supposed to do? Creep on Steve from a safe distance and yearn to be fighting beside him?

Yep. 

Tony flies off into space because I’m not joking, he’s really lonely, and then a ship attacks him. He calls his team right away (since, you know, they’re not busy or anything, he just needs Steve around) but it turns out that the ships that are attacking him are empty. (While crossing paths, Thor and the Hulk high-five each other. THEIR FRIENDSHIP SUSTAINS ME). 

A plane falls from the sky and Tony gets all jealous and insecure about the people on the plane cheering Thor on instead of him. Well Thor is awesome, darling, look at those luscious locks…. 

(Seriously. The banter in this episode is fucking wonderful.) Steve and Tony are giving the orders and co-leading the team effortlessly. It’s kind of everything you could ever want in something with the words “Avengers” in it.

Tony about his Daddy: [He was] too busy saving the world to worry about his ‘people skills’….
Clint: Sounds familarrrrr…..
Tony: You got a point, circus act? (Damn Tony, is this a sensitive issue??)
Clint: Nope! No point at all!

Yeah. I think it might be…. this is going to come up later….

The dude in the main ship that crash-landed is actually a really fucked up Red Skull. It’s creepy to see because he’s like…… drugged up or something. He’s delusional. He warns them about Thanos and everyone but Steve’s like 'who the fuck is that and who gives a crap.’ A bunch of robots end up beating them up and Steve finds that the Skull has a magical red stone. Guess what it is, guys……THE POWER STONE (Holy bananas!!!) Steve touches it and almost blows up……Well, kinda…… (Poor voice actor guy, he screams for like 4 minutes.) 

Tony: Guys, change of focus… *stop paying attention to the robots shooting at you* “Cap’s going nuclear… *Cap’s going nuclear oh my god what’s happening to him Jarvis scan him tell me what’s happening?!*

He’s not actually. He’s going……………………………………. cosmic. OH SHITS. Which means his muscles get all huge and he turns bright pink. While everyone shields themselves from the blast he’s creating, Tony hovers above them all, just watching him. He’s the first to land in front of Steve once he’s shrunk back down to normal. It’s okay, guys. Tony’s got this. 

The only thing that can contain the Power stone is a little machine thingy that Howard built called Project Arsenal. Howard used the machine thingy to contain a radioactive blast in the middle of a small town, so they all go to that small town to search for it. 

Look at our boys. Just doin’ their thing… casually ignoring the others and chit chattin’ because this is serious…

They get attacked by a fucking HUGE ASS ship that ends up setting off a gamma containment unit (oh of course it does, oh my god), giving Tony only 60 seconds to contain it before everything blows up. Turns out, the machine thingy that Howard built is actually an adorable human-sized robot that trapped itself inside the containment unit for safe keeping. You know. Where it should be. Nice and safe in an abandoned radiation unit…

Tony: These readings make no sense…
Steve: Research later Tony! *I know you love robots sweetheart but now is not the time!*

Long story short, Arsenal (the human-sized robot) saves the day and the Avengers bring the HUGE ASS ship down and call SHIELD in to deal with it. Typical protocol so that they can all head on home and hang out together, eat some popcorn, play video games, chit chat, have casual sex in Tony’s lab. You know, typical. 

And now I’m just going to point out real quick that Tony’s relationship with Howard is kind of adorable in AA. I might get shit for that but I don’t care, it’s true. Arsenal was specifically made for Tony. It was specifically made to not only protect him, but to actually play with him. Howard felt so guilty about not spending time with his kid that he set aside some time to build Tony his own best friend. Because that’s the only way Howard knew how to deal with that thing called "feelings” and “fatherhood”. He’s an engineer and he saw a problem and that’s how he thought he could fix it. He even programed it with little video files of himself trying to teach Tony how to shave. 

How fucking adorable is that. 

(Steve thinks it’s adorable. Look at him.)

If this thing’s primary programming is to keep Tony safe, I think we can all assume that Steve is 100% okay with this.  =D

And that’s the end! I like to think that by this point, Steve and Tony are so incredibly comfortable with each other that they could have kicked their relationship up a notch…. After the overwhelming gayness that was Season 1, i’m sure one of them went up to the other and was like “dude, you’re clearly in to me so let’s cut the crap and go to town on each other. You in?” And the other inevitably said “hell yeah, the walls look pretty soundproof, let’s do this”. And they did. They achieved ‘casual fuck-buddies’ status. 

That’s my theory and I’m sticking to it. 

MCU fans, do yourself a favor.

Watch Avengers Assemble - the WatchDisneyXD show.

Realize that this could easily  be canon in the MCU.

As in, it could be the actual Saturday Morning TV show that people in MCU watch.

Can you imagine?  A whole show written off broad characterizations based on what most of the “normal” people who live and work in the MCU would know about the Avengers.

Its the closet thing to an Avengers sitcom we’ll ever get.

BONUS:  Body and mind swapping plots.  Evil-Twin AUs. De-aging plots.  Sam’s mother doesn’t know he’s an AVENGER plots.  I swear they use cheesy fanfiction for idea generators and its GLORIOUS.

EVEN MORE BONUS

Sassy McSassypants as his finest.

vine

When Cap was about to say “Avengers Assemble” but got cut off with credits…

2

i swear to god, I SWEAR TO GOD, the writers of this show ship stevetony and read fanfic on ao3 

LOOK AT THE FIRST PHOTO i mean he has TWO PAINTINGS OF TONY on his wall THEY ARE RIGHT IN THE CENTER and that tony painting on the left like TONY WITH A COFFEE MUG AND A SLIGHTLY ANNOYED LOOK ON HIS FACE LIKE doesn’t that look like he just woke up and steve handed him coffee or something and STRANGLE ME if that doesn’t sound like EVERY FIC I’VE EVER READ EVER

AND THE SECOND PHOTO GOD steve’s painting the very first episode of the first season where HE SAVES TONY AND THEY BRING THE TEAM BACK TOGETHER LIKE NO DON’T LOOK AT ME THIS IS SO GAY THIS IS SO SO GAY