i hate d/avek/at for reasons that relate to my abuse, and it makes me really nervous about interacting with other kinfolk because it's so popular and it feels like everyone remembers it in their canons (including me, lmao) and i'm really scared about getting backlash for saying i don't like it, and don't want to be around people talking about it, especially since i'm not dave or karkat? i'm john? i shouldn't have an issue with this?? but here we are. i'm kind of just really bitter.