australian mines

You know, a lot of the Space Orcs posts have humans as the not-as-technologically-advanced species in the galaxy who came into whatever intergalactic government exists, but in reality humans would probably be one of the first species to achieve interstellar travel due to the fact that we have absolutely no sense of safety.

Humans say they want to go to the moon? Yeah right, they don’t even have nuclear power under control. But instead they just stick themselves in an explosive powered tube that has a computer less powerful than today’s average calculator and LAUNCH THEMSELVES INTO SPACE

The humans wanted to build a giant particle collider? Sounds good, but wait! There’s a chance that it could create a black hole, LETS DO IT ANYWAYS AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS!

And how about the hydrogen bomb? Scientists thought it could LIGHT THE ATMOSPHERE ON FIRE. Did they stop? NO, THEY TESTED IT ANYWAYS

Imagine aliens going through our scientific records and realizing how little we care what negative results happen, they do stuff just to satisfy their curiosity. They threaten their very existence in the universe to answer a simple question, a question that brings fear to any non-human ears that hear it, and that question is “But why?”

Humans are weird...

I love all these humans are weird posts so I’m trying my hand at one. I’ve been thinking, humans are like, ridiculous specialists. Our brains is so big we’re born prematurely so as not to tear our mothers apart. And we’re born crazy weak and we have super long childhoods to compensate. We pack bond and bond with bigger creatures to deal with this (this is why we think babies of all species are cute, it’s basically a drive to take care of this weak little thing because our own children are so weak). So what if alien species evolved so there was one, super weak but really brilliant species, has fine motor skills, huge language skills etc, and one that evolved as a symbiote that was basically huge protective dog/ox type to do the heavy lifting. And it’s really bizarre that we don’t have this symbiosis. Like the fact that humans are a stand alone species is weird. We seem huge and bulky to the tiny intelligent species (in my head it’s basically an otter/raven hybrid) and small and delicate to the other. And they don’t get how we function alone, until they see us spilling our pack bonding instincts all over everything, hostile predators, teddy bears, roombas, even cups with little chips in them. And then it’s like, oh I see, you don’t bond really strongly to one thing you bond just a little bit to everything and wait to see what sticks.

If I had only one piece of study advice to pass on, it would be constant summary pages. Every week or two, take one side of A4 and write down everything important by hand from that period. It might take 5 minutes, it might take 30. Either way, when that exam burnout sets in, you will thank yourself. Don’t use the pages as exhaustive study - use them as a contents page for your revision, or as a checklist to see what you do or don’t remember.

Yo guys what do ya reckon aliens would make of humans chattering their teeth? Like human jaws suddenly vibrate when it get below a certain temperature and the aliens are like

Alien: human steve are you ok?

Steve: yeah man its just kinda cold

Alien: should your jaw be doing that?

Steve: oh yeah that just happens when humans get cold

Alien:????

But like humans are adaptive to different climates so like one day theyre on some alright temperate plantet but a chilly wind blows in

Alien: human steve why are you not doing the teeth vibration?

Steve: huh? Nah man its not that cold just a little breeze

Alien: but human sara is teeth vibrating? Has it not gotten to cold for humans to refrain from vibrating?

Steve: nah you see sara is australian shes not to used to the cold. *whispers* its their only weakness

Alien: *shock*

Alright so this isn’t a proper story, but I was going through my dashboard when this gem showed up


And it got me thinking about all the stupid shit people do for amusement. Like in this picture and ones like it. When humans are bored and have nothing to do they will go to no end to find something to distract them.

So imagine a human in a high-risk job just looking at an alien Co-worker and saying “Hey dude, watch this” and starts miming something out with an unreasonably dangerous object.

Anyways this has been tired writing with me

4

“Congratulations Serena on 23. I have been right there with you, some of them I lost right there against you. Your win has always been my win, I think you know that. All the times I couldn’t be there, wouldn’t be there, didn’t get there, you were there. I’m enormously proud of you, you mean the world to me.”