Relationship: Bucky x reader
Word count: 1,625
Tags: Fluff and comfort
Based off my own prompt (wow original); BED SHARING AUS
Hope you enjoy :)
Jumping in her chair, she drew a shaky breath as she took in her surroundings. She was sitting at a desk, her research paper sporting a stain as she must have drooled on it. Sighing, she realized she had fallen asleep. Her heart was still thumping from her nightmare and her room felt a lot colder than it usually was. Groaning at the pain in her neck, she stood up and threw on the sweater that was flung across her chair. Walking out of her room, she planned to get a nice cup of tea to soothe her soul.
“Hey.” A sudden voice made her gasp and groan as her heart picked up speed again. Bucky was leaning against a counter in the kitchen and gave her an apologetic smile. “Sorry.” He mumbled. The moonlight seemed to give him an eerily glow and her stomach threw a fit at the softness in his eyes as he looked at her.
“It’s fine.” She sighed with a smile as she made her way past him towards the cabinets. Opening up one, she turned to see his brows furrowed as he took in the dark circles under her eyes. “What?”
He hesitated before speaking, choosing his words carefully. “You look…tired.” He seemed to already regret his words and she knew why. Her…how to put this, her ‘sleeping pattern’ was a common knowledge between the rest of the Avengers. At first, it was a secret she only shared with Steve. But eventually, Steve had to go on missions and she became dangerously sleep deprived. So, she told Natasha, who surprised her greatly by agreeing to help. But then Natasha went on missions with Steve, so she went to Thor for help. Tony made remarks at first, but then started seeking her out to cuddle. She knew he struggled with nightmares too and was happy to be helping him as well. Eventually, everyone on the team knew, but they still treated her normally and for that she was thankful.
She wasn’t always like this. When she was younger she could sleep just fine by herself. Then…the nightmares began. You’d think having a superpower would improve your life, but it was not so in her case. She had to experience the horrors of other people around the world every time she fell asleep. It was exhausting and most times she would avoid sleeping until she couldn´t anymore.
But, the one good thing she had discovered is that having a cuddle buddy drew out the real-life dreams. Somehow, instead of latching onto someone else in the world, she latched onto the mind of her cuddle buddy as they slept. Finally she was able to dream, even if it was someone else’s dream.
“I’m always tired, aren’t I?” she tried to joke, shrugging her shoulders. Bucky didn’t laugh though, his brows furrowing in concern.
“Have you slept at all this week?” He asked carefully.
This week had been hell, as somehow all the Avengers, except Bucky, hadn’t been at home. Bucky was one of the few teammates she had never cuddled with, both because they didn’t know each other that well and he was way too closed off for that stuff, so she assumed. Not that she was complaining, she’d deny it if ever asked, but she may have a tiny crush on the blue eyed soldier, and may not be able to handle casual cuddling with him.
“Yeah, of course, I just woke up.” She was still trying to sound light to not worry him, but she knew she looked and sounded just as exhausted as she felt.
“Y/N…” he trailed off, seemingly trying to decide something. Don’t say it, don’t say it, don’t say it. “Do you, um…would you like me to cuddle you?” he finished, scratching his neck and hesitantly looking her in the eye.
Crap. There goes her heart, beating fast. She was taken by surprise; it didn’t hurt as much as it did after the nightmares. It was…slightly nice. She was suddenly aware of her gaping face and red cheeks and quickly cleared her throat.
“I mean, if you want to.” Wait, no, those were not the words she intended to say. She tried to blame her tired mind and ignored the small thought that suggested it could be because she wanted this more than she realized.
“You need it, of course I want to…I mean I’m willing to help you.” Of all the time she had known the man, she had never heard him ramble like that. Not that he spoke often enough for it to happen, but still. He was avoiding her eyes now and she had to take a deep breath before speaking.
“Okay…um, follow me.” What was she doing? Follow me? She grabbed his hand and hoped he didn’t feel her shakiness as she led him away from her forgotten tea and towards her bedroom.
They didn’t speak as she closed the door after them and stood there with him in awkward silence. Taking a deep breath and silencing her mind, she crawled under the covers and shuffled to give him space. He seemed unsure of what he was doing, but still didn’t hesitate as slid in next to her. They lay awkwardly beside each other for a moment, debating to themselves how to play this. Eventually she convinced herself this was just like with everyone else and snuggled close to him, draping an arm over his stomach and placing her head under his arm.
After a few moments of even more awkward stiffness, he relaxed slightly and settled his mechanic arm on her waist, before quickly drawing it back. Confused, she looked up to see the slight…fear…on his face.
“What’s wrong?” she asked frowning. Did she do something wrong?
“I…just didn’t realize it was that…one.” Puzzled, she followed his gaze to his metallic arm lying beside her. She looked back at him as she realized why he was afraid.
“Oh Bucky, I don’t care, I really don’t.” she gave him a reassuring smile and grabbed the hand beside her and laid it back on her waist. He went rigid as confusion spread on his face, his eyes raking between her and his hand.
“But…” he trailed off.
“Bucky, seriously, it doesn’t scare me, I trust you.” Her own hand gripped his and she trailed her thumb over the sleek metal. “I actually think it’s pretty cool.” Her smiled widened nervously as he looked to have difficulty believing her. “Bucky, when have I ever been afraid of it?”
She was surprised he was even concerned about this, though she couldn’t blame him. His dark past is directly connected with the mechanic arm from Hydra. But the fact is, she was the only one, besides Steve, that didn’t have an issue with trusting him since he joined the team, and didn’t shy away or narrow her eyes at the super arm attached to the super solider. She didn’t like to judge people without knowing them in and out, which has caused her trouble before, but she still held strong to the belief that there’s always more to people than meets the eye.
He seemed to realize this but still didn’t relax beneath her. He kept staring into her eyes, trying to find something that indicated she was lying but coming up empty.
“Why aren’t you afraid of me?” He whispered, almost as if he didn’t want her to hear him. She gave a small sigh with a fond smile on her face as she sat up slightly to be more level with him.
“Why are you concerned about my well being enough to cuddle with me?” he seemed taken aback and she wasn’t sure through the dark, but she thought she saw him blushing. “Because you care, because in spite of what others think, you are a good person, Bucky. Believe me, I’ve seen enough bad people to know you’re not one of them. You care about me, just like I care about you.” She answered her own question, trying to sound as sincere as possible. His lips parted in shock and he stared at her at loss at words. She couldn’t keep the smile off her face as she brushed a lock of his hair away from his face. She wasn’t sure what had come over her, but the expression his face drew her in and she gave him a small peck on his lips. Drawing back, she felt the rain of realization wash over her. Feeling her heart hammering again, she cleared her throat and looked at everything but him, screaming at herself in her head. Just as she was about to run out of the room, she felt his lips on hers again, and it took a moment for her to understand what was happening. His fingers brushed across her cheek as they slowly started to move their lips against each other. There it was again, that nice, fast beating of her heart and Bucky’s body finally relaxed completely. They tried to make the bliss last as long as they could, but eventually they separated to breathe. A beautiful smile crept its way up his face and she felt her heart skip.
“I don’t deserve you.” He mumbled, and as she opened her mouth to object, he quickly spoke again. “And you’re right, I am concerned about your well being, which is why you should go to sleep now.” He gently pushed her back down and tightened his grip on her. She let her body melt against his, feeling his cool metal fingers brushing up and down her arm, slowly lulling her to sleep. Before she passed out, she let out a content whisper.
“You deserve so much more than you think.”