Tony turned off Finding Nemo after it had finished.
“That was sad…” he said to himself thinking about the hardship and journey that Nemo’s father had to endure. What could Tony do to stop such an unfortunate thing happening again? “If only Nemo and his dad had been dead from the very beginning none of that would’ve had to have happened…”
He stroked his chin. This didn’t help improve thinking, he’d just seen it on TV and thought it was necessary to mimic when doing the “thoughty-brainies.” He turned and saw a pile of coal next to his desk.
“Of course!” an idea dimly lit up in his mind. “Kill them with coal!”
He called Greg Hunt immediately.
“I have a plan!” He explained his plan to destroy the great barrier reef. After all, it was like a mercy killing in advance right? That’s good isn’t it? Fish didn’t want to live in a world where he was in power anyway…
“Nice plan!” Greg hung up and resumed strangling a dolphin in front of its family.
Tony stared at the coal on his desk with a perplexed look.
“Julie? Where did all this coal come from?” he screamed inquisitively.
“Santa came early to deliver it to you for being a terrible fucking person” she called back through the walls, disinterested.